I think we can all agree at this point that there’s no need to speculate on whether or not Scuz and Durt are vaccinated. Sarah has complained about lockdown THAT MUCH that if she was given the all clear to actually go to the gym/shop etc then she’d make a HUUUUUUUGE deal about it on Instagram. But she isn’t.
Agreed. Changing direction - I recently got recommended one of her early vids (circa 4-5 years ago?), and I thought, ok I’ll bite (still didn’t make it through though). And wow.
Even though her ego wasn’t quite as overblown as it is now (it was still big and she is verrrrry self centred), and she looked more normal in the face, there were so many disordered behaviours, pretty much constant, that I never picked up on at the time. And these were probably the videos I watched when I first discovered her.
There’s several scenes where she’s talking about how hungry she is, so she makes a ‘LoW GI’ smoothie, with zucchini - ZUCCHINI - to “mAkE iT cReAMy” ?!
Later on she
weighs said zucchini when making a salad or something.
Now if you know anything about zucchini you’ll know it is very low calorie, and is certainly not creamy.
Weighing my food, even very low calorie vegetables, was 100% something I did in the height of my ED, same with weird food combos (although I never had a zucchini smoothie or cinnamon cucumber, wtf).
The more it went on the more I was just like: ‘I’m just watching an ED how to’. It was pretty blatant - up at 5am for a SwEaTy SesH, smoothie for fullness (but with no substance), a weird salad with almond milk and anchovies, another workout, binge on chocolate and fruit and nut mix. I turned off at the end when she was wrapping up basically berating herself for ‘slipping up’.
It looked so much like one of my days when I was really feeding my ED and trying to convince myself I was in control. Multiple workouts a day, very little and weird foods, and then sometimes a binge. It would consumed my entire day. I would factor things like work and study and socialising around my workout and eating schedule, not vice versa. On days where I could justify it, it meant I literally didn’t have energy for anything else than my set routine.
But Sarah made an entire channel/job of it. Documenting her ED, crashing, then repeating. Only she’s in so deep at this point she’d never admit she has a problem…
idk where I’m going with this post. It just hit very different watching her old vlog content without my rose tinted (sezzy werk) glasses on!