Sali Hughes #6 Eric's at the cat flap, hide your side of beef with a shower cap!

[litereally]

Just caught up and realised after reading everyone's spendy shames on the last thread how SH was really the gateway beauty dealer that led to the whole beauty spending problem I had a few years ago which culminated in going to the US for the first time and spending £800 over the week I was there purely on makeup (Sephora and Ulta can fuck off). Now, mostly that was because of youtube influencers by that point (2015) but it all started with the idea that the sexy empowered woman I was desperate to be in 2012 wore a red lip and did it in her sexy black chanel travel mirror, that Chanel Pirate, the stupid mirror I broke weeks later when it fell out of my handbag. Not to mention the credit card debt the whole stupid lifestyle left me saddled with (just a few months more until it's all paid off!)

Also this week I was idly looking on depop for Acne Pistols even though I can't wear heels, let alone wear them every day. This shit runs DEEP.

I'm so sick of the stupid beauty and makeup industry idea that face paint has more innovation than the bloody tech industry. That there's always a new bloody serum or moisturiser or newly discovered universally flattering shade of [insert current trendy colour here] that we just HAVE to buy, that these influencers somehow find time to change their skincare and makeup every bloody month, but still repurchase things of course, the old favourites they've loved for YEARS even if it only came out. It's all such bollocks driven by industry press releases and deadlines. I feel such an idiot to have fallen for it.

Hyper Consumerist Performative Makeup Culture isn't going to "solve" the problems of my life, all it did was make me want to buy all the things and hope they'd make me feel better. Years later though I'm still the same skidmark with saggy eyelids that'll never be big enough for drag queen elaborate eyeshadow looks, thin hair that will never look like it has extensions in it, and skin that's actually fine, thanks.

 

[PineappleQueen19]

A fair comment in response to IK’s tweet about today’s column. No response, of course

 

[Tesla's Ghost]

Skincare on a skiing holiday.

During the day, when you are being pulled by a wire with legs in a position like you are trying to hide your genitals, be sure to wear a high SPF, I swear by The French Academy of Thermal Opulence 's Visage Leggere SPF 50 (£95). Don't forget to put a lip balm that also provides protection from the sun, as well as cold wind and hot beverages. Try Earth Goddess Mother's balm Womb (£35), hand made by a former socialite who had a nervous breakdown after her husband left her for his assistant, and is now trying to find something to do. Ingredients include bitter almond oil and traces of cocaine. Finally, the best hand cream that will protect your skin even as you wave goodbye to your offspring and the au pair that will look after them, Corsica's Rose Blubber (£24,50). And for budget recommendations - as if you can afford a skiing vacation.

There. I could be a beauty writer, too.

 

[Jelly Bean]

Just caught up and realised after reading everyone's spendy shames on the last thread how SH was really the gateway beauty dealer that led to the whole beauty spending problem I had a few years ago which culminated in going to the US for the first time and spending £800 over the week I was there purely on makeup (Sephora and Ulta can fuck off). Now, mostly that was because of youtube influencers by that point (2015) but it all started with the idea that the sexy empowered woman I was desperate to be in 2012 wore a red lip and did it in her sexy black chanel travel mirror, that Chanel Pirate, the stupid mirror I broke weeks later when it fell out of my handbag. Not to mention the credit card debt the whole stupid lifestyle left me saddled with (just a few months more until it's all paid off!)

Also this week I was idly looking on depop for Acne Pistols even though I can't wear heels, let alone wear them every day. This shit runs DEEP.

I'm so sick of the stupid beauty and makeup industry idea that face paint has more innovation than the bloody tech industry. That there's always a new bloody serum or moisturiser or newly discovered universally flattering shade of [insert current trendy colour here] that we just HAVE to buy, that these influencers somehow find time to change their skincare and makeup every bloody month, but still repurchase things of course, the old favourites they've loved for YEARS even if it only came out. It's all such bollocks driven by industry press releases and deadlines. I feel such an idiot to have fallen for it.

Hyper Consumerist Performative Makeup Culture isn't going to "solve" the problems of my life, all it did was make me want to buy all the things and hope they'd make me feel better. Years later though I'm still the same skidmark with saggy eyelids that'll never be big enough for drag queen elaborate eyeshadow looks, thin hair that will never look like it has extensions in it, and skin that's actually fine, thanks.

Brilliant. You have articulated so well what is rotten in the house of SH and influencers generally. Actually made me quite sad. We have all been there. All tried to have that sassy girl around town look at vast expense - because that was so normalised. We all bought into the myth that spending money on unsuitable things is empowering. And the next thing. Then the next must have thing. In the light of this debacle I've been reading my copy of Pretty Honest (lent not purchased) and it has not aged well in a few years. Ironic eh? It's just about chucking money at beauty shit as a form of empowerment. I wear makeup and know I probably look better in it but do you know what I actually just don't care that much any more. A Chanel red lippy to be pulled out of my clutch in a restaurant will never ever make me feel better than the knowledge I am the age I am. I may look it. I may not. I am healthy and happy. I'm cross with people like SH for insinuating this wasn't good enough.
Thanks again for that brilliant post which unleashed that rant!

 

[BettyDoodah]

Morning, SideBeefs!

My favourite reply to IK hissy fit about not being invited to sign the Naga letter was from a black woman who told her to "sit down" due to the fact that she's mixed race and has had 3 white husbands. Priceless

 

[PineappleQueen19]

It’s rich coming from Grazia, one of the gutter magazines pretending to be sophisticated, with accolades including the hounding of Jennifer Anniston as “Poor Jen” and the Jen v Angelina wars, the mocking and hounding of Amy Winehouse to her death.. I think they massively went in for the “Waity Katey” bullshit as well. Probably currently perpetuating the Meghan vs Kate bullshit narrative. They need to get off their high horse pronto.

 

[Birdie42]

I have been quietly following the threads since joining on that fateful Friday! However, I have found a community of like minded people (i too must be a skid mark!), have laughed out aloud and followed with interest, the largely witty, sassy, compassionate and intelligent posts that have been written here. The exposure of twitter bullying and sheer ruthlessness of people I respected has been both shocking and eye opening. DOP is ace and has a special place in my heart..especially after mousegate!!
I also, like others, have made purchases that I couldn’t afford in trying to attain something that isn’t real. However, you live and learn, and as long as we do learn (forums like this help!), then hopefully our bank balances and self esteem will be all the better for it

However, can I just add that I have never respected IK!

 

[Jelly Bean]

A fair comment in response to IK’s tweet about today’s column. No response, of course

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Brilliant. And you know what will be so galling is how well written and articulate it is. They can't tell themselves that only thick skidmarks object to their grubby ways.

Btw wtf were St Pimple's 'lawyers' thinking? Let's pretend she actually rang them up saying 'I'm being bullied. I'm going to make a video exposing it all'. Would they not say 'this is a can of worms. You really need to think very very carefully about your own online history before you do that. Have you ever bullied anyone online?'

St P. 'No'.

Lawyer. 'Think carefully. No women journalists, presenters and authors? No wives of Hollywood and Emmy winning stars? Even if it was years and years ago? You've never staged a Twitter campaign to get a woman the sack so you could have her job? Never wanted to punch women in the face? No? Phew. Great. Go ahead then'.

 

[Jelly Bean]

I can definitely identify with the "bought all the crap the charlatan recommend" theme. I fully take responsibility for my own actions but I ended up £20,000 in debt because it was always about the new or the next for validation.
I do still adore beauty and skincare and am really passionate about it but now I have a drastically reduced budget (because 75% of my pay goes to paying off debts) I tend to be much more picky about what I spend my money on. Yes, I will Google for hours, watch YouTube demos, but mostly I trust my own instincts on if something is right for me.

I'll jump in and admit to an expensive Hughes recommended product that was a massive waste of money for me. Parlux hairdryer. Firstly, I air dry my hair 98.7% of the time and secondly I'd need to put in some serious gym time to be able to use it on myself as it is so phenomenally heavy.
The only use it gets it to blow dry the dog if he gets wet on his walk. Over a hundred quid for something only the dog uses.

So many of of us here now. It is absolutely brilliant. Buying something SH recommended. Thought it was 'meh' at best or just shit but still thinking 'this must be my fault. I'm just not getting it but everyone else is'. So buy the next recommendation to see if things change.
All fed the mantra makeup is important and empowering. In Pretty Honest I was perusing earlier SH keeps using the term 'nerdy' re her interest in beauty. 'Now I might be a beauty nerd but...'. Now I think this is quite calculated. It implies something almost scientific and specialist. Quite niche. Justifying endless buying of 'stuff' because I'm a nerd. Makeup isn't trivial but very important and almost a science. Normalising 30 expensive lipsticks because 'I'm a beauty nerd. You wouldn't understand. And if you don't you just aren't as cool as me. But buy stuff and you might be!'.

I like makeup and wear it but ffs it isn't important. It just isn't.

 

[Jelly Bean]

OK, so...

Nazi collaborator - "dodgy" politics, let's not talk about it, doesn't matter, buy the lipstick, enjoy eye fucking yourself in the mirror as you put it on.

Susan Sarandon supports a candidate - she got Trump into the White House, even unwillingly because she's an idiot, doesn't support other women etc.

This makes sense.

Exactly. I'm not going mad am I? It is all just very strange? This is the quote from Pretty Honest. Under Beauty Icons.
'I adore Coco Chanel for many reasons. Dodgy politics aside, she was an awesome and inspiring woman'.
'
Isn't that like (for a very exaggerated example I know) saying 'As patio layers go I adore Fred West, dodgy parenting aside'. Is there an 'aside' when it comes to something like that?
Can your professional life cancel out your utterly depraved private life? (Omg that sounds like a Carrie voice over to a particularly hardhitting Sex and the City).

 

[Jelly Bean]

For all their so-called feistiness and 'zero fucks given' attitude SH and her chums are awfully delicate flowers when someone doesn't agree with them. No idea how to debate and not take it personally. I was reading with fascination Caroline Hirons on twitter today. She just tweeted something about 'remind me never to mention the word vegan on twitter again' and saying how preachy vegans are. So I read the original (which was about Lewis Hamilton) expecting unhinged ravings from people - instead comments were intelligent, polite, but just not agreeing with her 100%. These bluetickers are so used to every utterance being unchallenged that when someone does, however politely, they can't handle it - block, mute, moan, lable it trolling, be rude 'dunno', imply people are nutters. Next tactic is to bang on about how great Twitter used to be, when it was such a wonderful community before all the foul hordes got their greasy beefy mitts on it (when you could bully people for nearly a year unchallenged apparently and brag about wanting to punch people in the face).
No wonder their heads would explode finding somewhere like this .

Wasn't aware that there was a leader here? Would love to know who this is!

'I am Spartacus!'

 

[joancrawford]

Long-time lurker/moderate SH reader until the Instagram debacle unfolded.

Her obsession over this place is rooted in her own unconscious belief that she is, in fact, a bad person. She and her mates have to publicly lambaste everyone on here as subhuman scum because they can't live in a world where any of the criticism *could* be credible. But of course they all know that some of it must be, which is why they're so defensive, circling the wagons every time one of them breaks a nail.

Seriously witty writing on here btw, 10/10. And not remotely as vicious as SH & co. made it out to be. Well done guys.

 

[Jelly Bean]

If it was men saying what we said would that be better or worse? Why bring gender into it?

(I don't think of any of you fellow skidmarks as having a gender tbh - we cave dwelling shitmouth turds always struck me as sort of shapeless lumps with beef strapped to where our faces might be).

 

[Ginger fuzz]

New member (and lurker until now!) - used to be an SH fan but got increasingly irritated when she stopped doing the Guardian videos and stopped updating SHB, the fact that all the influencers were flogging the same products and people and the ‘normalizing’ of spending considerable amounts of money on must have products. Don’t believe for one instant that any reputable lawyer would have been happy with her posting that statement. Am also shocked at how supposedly ‘professional’ women conduct themselves online - can’t believe it’s in line with their employers’ SM policies? If I had posted anything remotely like that I would have been lucky not to have been sacked. Anyway, rant over - I shall go back to lurking...

 

[Jelly Bean]

Yes, the consumers that are being targeted are not allowed to critically think, have differing opinion, or call out lack of transparency or the hypocrisy. And yet, those so against diverse opinion, themselves talk about "punching women in the tits", have relentless hateful twitter threads targeting women, trying to get a woman who was self made, sacked etc. We should just blindly support and consume any product marketed, and insecurity created to justify the -need- for a new product, all the while these gatekeepers don't care about the monetry value to the average person, who could never sustain the amount that is being flogged.

Who cares if the influencer claims to be pro-animal rights yet flogs animal tested brands, heaps of limited recyclable material, overpriced "must haves" and isn't transparent that the thing claimed to be loved for years, is just another undeclared AD.

Brilliant. Just brilliant.
It is comments like this that people like SH are so scared of. They keep telling themselves how thick and jealous we are but this is what deep down they are terrified of. Clever people seeing through their shit.

New member (and lurker until now!) - used to be an SH fan but got increasingly irritated when she stopped doing the Guardian videos and stopped updating SHB, the fact that all the influencers were flogging the same products and people and the ‘normalizing’ of spending considerable amounts of money on must have products. Don’t believe for one instant that any reputable lawyer would have been happy with her posting that statement. Am also shocked at how supposedly ‘professional’ women conduct themselves online - can’t believe it’s in line with their employers’ SM policies? If I had posted anything remotely like that I would have been lucky not to have been sacked. Anyway, rant over - I shall go back to lurking...

Don't lurk! Stay! God I sound needy. But you seriously hit the nail on the head. People like you are who people like SH are scared of. Former fans with their eyes opened.

 

[PineappleQueen19]

I like to imagine the folder of printouts from here came to an abrupt stop when the pages of Dawn O'P bully tweets started filling page after page. Was the folder #gifted or a #press sample? I think we should be told.

Yeah when did she realise she was just printing out her own misadventures? “Oh yeah that time I tweeted out where Liz Jones lives.. hmm, best leave that page out.. and when I tweeted about punching that woman in the face... hmmm.. that can’t go in.. And what I said about Esther Coren... fuck. Turn the printer off.”

 

[melfish]

Ooops, that was a little large. Should I have inserted a thumbnail?

 

[Adverse Camber]

Search on twitter for IK's @ + Malala - interesting. Though probably belongs on th IK thread. Apologies if I"m repeating stuff already discussed.


You've spelt journalist wrong.

IK or a minion has done a vast delete session - she's down to about 350 tweets. I got the gist from Google though. Oy.

This was a reply to one of her deleted tweets.

 

[Jelly Bean]

It’s aggressive and so not on anymore. SH has highjacked the Gordon Ramsey- circa 2007 attitude about any topic she chooses to talk about or the manner in the way she addresses anyone not quite agreeing with with her. The over-use of the ‘loathe’ word in her columns is remarkable. How aggravating can seemingly light-hearted beauty topics be? A lot apparently. It all feeds into her beauty message- that if you don’t do what you are told to do in very firm manner, you are not doing it right. Mind boggles!

Such a good point. Constant use of words like 'loathe' really does imply a right/wrong attitude closing down any nuance or discussion.
SH is quite old school I agree. I think her whole approach to beauty is now is a bit old hat. There simply has got to be a fresh approach to it all rather than buy something, usually expensive. I don't know the answer tbh. But I feel something is missing, an opportunity being missed. Even VB trundling up with her range is just more of the same. I was looking at some old cookbooks of mine recently including dear old Keith Floyd and omg the recipes were so difficult - half a teaspoon of this, 2 ounces of that and it made cooking seem so hard and scientific and off-putting and expensive. Then came along someone like Jamie Oliver who really was revolutionary for me at least as a timid cook. He made cooking accessible and fun.
Anyway I see SH as the old guard now, Fanny Craddock. Beauty doesn't seem much fun. Especially with the normalising of Botox which I just see as so sad. Not empowering at all but sad. As I said I don't have the answer.

 

[rosemarina]

I know I mentioned this on the Friday it all kicked off, but the sexism in women talking about women being problematic somehow but men talking about footballers / other such folk (I'm guessing almost exclusively male sports people) has never caused this kind of fury that I'm aware of. I'll pay attention to thinkpieces about this kind of space when it's not made out to be primarily a women v women issue.

Abso-fucking-lutely!

I can’t tell from the context whether this was intended

Plus, there’s an underlying air of virtuosity lingering, especially around Tattle Life.

but virtuosity does not mean “being virtuous”, it describes a state of being highly skilled at something. I assume the writer either didn’t know that they’d used the wrong word, or is secretly giving us all a high five for our efforts. Up top!