SacconeJolys #3 Cold shower punishments

[murphy]

The latest series of Wife Swap USA has an episode where a Youtube vlogging family swap with an off-grid family.

The little girl from the vlogging family is encouraged to perform for the vlog every day. After spending time with her substitute mother, playing games, making up stories, laughing and having fun, she says she doesn't miss her 'real' mother one bit. She says she feels so much happier without the camera recording her every move.

Surprise surprise.

Most of us here have an instinctive dislike of the whole family vlogging phenomenon. There's something deeply wrong about putting a camera between you and your child on a regular basis and making that camera almost into a third arm, always there. I'm sure we've all seen kids recoil from being filmed. Younger babies just grin because they're looking at their own reflection; not because they love being filmed (I've heard more than one vlogger try to say their baby just loves the limelight. Bollocks.)

They are CHILDREN. They don't have the capacity to understand any of it.

And you will never get a family vlogger to have an open and honest debate about any of it because they all know, deep down, that what they're doing is wrong and indefensible. But the money lures them in and keeps them locked into a lifestyle they then have to maintain. The new life with better cars, better houses, becomes a very visible part of their vlogging content. They can't step out of the cage, they can't afford to turn the camera off.

But if it's sad to imagine the adult trapped in this constant competition for views and subscribers, what about the child? This isn't a TV show, this is their life, played out in real time, across months and years.

The more I think about family vlogging the more bizarre, appalling and just plain screwed up it seems.

 

[Ruby’s mum]

Two year old wakes up from a nap to find something in her nappy. As she is in the throes of being potty trained she sleepily registers that it doesn’t feel right so puts her hand in to remove and inspect it. She is naturally curious (as she is two) so plays around with the substance then finds it sticky, smelly and probably a bit unpleasant so does the normal thing which is to wipe it off. As she is alone in her cot there isn’t much else she can do. She isn’t ‘smearing’ it or being naughty, she is being normal. Fucking heartless, insensitive, unthinking, incompetent idiots.

 

[Andsoitbegins]

Looks like I have blocked by Anna on insta. I am a mother of 2 and a social worker. I am very tolerant and respect people’s parenting decisions as far as is possible. But giving a child a cold shower to shock them into changing behaviour is abusive and a total abuse of parental power. This is not ok. And Kelly is 110% right to be calling them out on this as we all should.

 

[Prodcon21]

Can you imagine the uproar if it was reported in the news that care homes were punishing elderly, incontinent patients with cold showers?

Yet some seem to think it’s ok to do to a 2 year old? I just don’t understand how people are saying it’s “not that big a deal”

 

[HelenLovejoy]

Hi guys.
I’ve been reading this thread and others on tattle for a few weeks. My mind has been opened to the sad reality of children being used for money making purposes. I am a mum of three, also a teacher. I am a fan of letting children be children. I am also a fan of guiding children to be kind and conscientious members of society. Sometimes this entails discipline, but the levels of discipline vary from family to family. Family is intimate. It is safe. It is love. It is guidance. Sometimes I’m stressed and yell, sometimes I growl, sometimes I give dirty looks. I know this is me losing control. I quietly reflect and try harder the next day. I can’t see how publicly shaming a child, for being a child is acceptable.

Not one blue tick has addressed this. Cold showers are horrid, but sadly recommended by some. The cold shower in itself is horrid, but the true pain and torture here is the child being exposed. The lack of intimacy. Sharing moments that need to be kept private and special.

Childhood is a series of special moments that need to kept in the mind and hearts of the family. We as people can not be defined by the actions of our youth.

Sorry for the incredibly long message but my heart is heavy regarding this case.

Keep our children safe.

Respect their privacy.

Give them a safe space.

Home is intimate.

 

[Pinchme]

Wow, so daddy of the year has blocked me on Twitter for disagreeing giving a 2yr old cold showers.

What a sad nasty little twat he is.

 

[Tublet83]

Says everything that is wrong with social media and a lack of legislation when an adult is highlighting the abuse of a child, and they get penalised as a bully

 

[Fizmozoo]

You only have to look at the comparisons between Emilia's first birthday and Andrea's. Emilia's party was full of family and excitement. Peppa pig decorations that you can buy in Tesco, food that the kids would enjoy. Not a whiff of gluten free, sugar free, dairy free lark.
Andrea's was lifeless and only her two family members there. Everything staged and fake. The food was for show and not child friendly. Everyone colour co ordinated for photos. No fun, no games, no kids. That's why they are so unrelatable. They only put on a show now, there's no natural fun or family time.
They are living a life I wouldn't swap for in a second. I'd rather genuine family and friends around me and my kids having every day fun. Getting dirty, wearing comfortable clothes, play doh on the carpet, paint on table, out door adventures, spontaneous car drives to pass an afternoon, getting down on the playroom floor and doing jig saws or board games with the children, etc.
It's just so sad they think they are providing their kids with this great life when in reality they are ruining their kids lives.
The poor babies waking up from a nap to a camera shoved in their faces with that annoying screeching voice waking you up to viewers.

 

[Peluna]

Emailed gleam...what can you do I’ve never even heard of this family until I saw them at the top thread repeatedly and I’m so upset by everything that I’ve seen and read. The laws need to change in this country and it needs changing quick. This oversharing of children for financial gain is simply child exploitation. I couldn’t begin to imagine how I’d feel today if I knew millions of people had watched me growing up everyday on the internet. When can people start to realise that children are not your possession, I have a son and I love him entirely however he is not ‘mine’, he is only 1 year old but he is still his own person with a right to privacy and dignity.

Good Afternoon,

I’m horrified to see the child abuse that is being shared to millions of people by your client the Saccone Joly family. As an agency for social media ‘influencers’ I believe you not only have a duty to your clients but also to the public. The term ‘influencer’’ was coined as such for the exact impact these people with large followers have - influence! Do you find it acceptable that millions of followers should see an influential family use a cold shower as a form as punishment? This sends a message to potentially vulnerable people that this is a good way to control their children’s behaviour. I’d really like to know what your opinion is on this and what you are going to do about it. I don’t expect a response as this is just being brushed under the carpet. Please take in what I have said and think carefully about what steps you can take to protect followers from being harmfully influenced. Please also consider that this family needs some serious help and guidance. I am not a troll, I am a ‘normal’ person genuinely concerned for their children and the impact this content could have on followers.

 

[Scarlett30]

She is absolutely spot on about their being no “governing body” to protect these kids on YouTube. Like there is with child actors/ models. They have set “work” hours, breaks, YouTube kids don’t. Then when things like this happen there is no “governing body” to protect the kids.

This needs changed ASAP!!! This is cause for petition, this is a child safeguarding issue.

 

[emmafranklin14]

Rufus hound has retweeted this, will be interesting to see if more mainstream media folk talk out about it and if they'll be threatened so easily into removing their views on it.

 

[Scarlett30]

What I find even stranger is that they both think it's so normal they edited it into the video, I just cant get my head around it how could this be so normalised they didnt think there would be any kind of disagreement, people have literally had the police called on them for smacking children in public but they reckon using an actual form of torture on a toddler would go down smoothly

As my husband said if that’s what they decide to share online..... what on Earth goes on behind closed doors?

 

[Jeannie3009]

Spotted this doing the rounds on social media.

 

[lemonandlime]

Ok, to abuse a child means to harm physically or mentally a child,right?
So if I put cold water on my boys (or anyone else)you can be sure they would shout so loud that my neighbors would hear them.
So it’s harmful right ?
So wtf with them saying it’s not abuse.
Let alone the mental abuse that they will suffer from that when they grow up.
Let me put some cold water when you’re naked to see if it is abuse, you coward dumb ass follower.

I think what should be noted is that Anna thought it was awful enough that she didn't feel physically able to administer the punishment herself! That's what shocks me the most to be honest. She knows it's so bad that she can't do it, yet she needs her personal slave do it to her baby???? That's sick.

 

[HopTop]

Louise Pentland deleted comments about the abuse despite being an 'NSPCC Ambassador'. Why? Because she has the same PR Company as them. Along with Zoella, Mrs Hinch and the likes. Gleam, the PR Company are very pally with the Daily Mail. This is why they haven't picked it up.

 

[Lucypea]

They didn’t think this was wrong at all that’s the biggest worry - they wouldn’t have posted it if they did.

Also I’m a social worker of ten years - Surrey mash team will open this as a referral and will have to consider the history of the family as part of the wider context of this new concern. What doesn’t help is anyone previously maliciously referring the family as this is on record and social care get such a lot of malicious referrals if there is a pattern it does impact on decision making. However if my team received a referral of this nature we would be asking the family to consent to a section 17 assessment. As part of that each of the children is spoken to on their own, often in school to get their views. This is done in the form of direct work so it’s not like the child is directly interrogated but rather asked to engage in role play with puppets, or complete work sheets or three houses took where they have to list things that they would like to change in their house or things they don’t like but it’s done in a way that prompts a lot of detail by the child. This would then be seen as good quality evidence if the older two talk about what happens when you are naughty. I hope anyone referring can upload the video as social care with clearly see on this occasion it is not malicious and parents are admitting it.

 

[murphy]

Anyone receiving a cease and desist letter rest assured that its a toothless document. It has no real legal merit. If they are trying to claim its defamatory for the cold showers to be discussed then they must also be aware that a case for defamation must pass the truth test. If people are commenting on what they have put in the public domain, and its of public concern, then no case for defamation would ever succeed.
They are bullies.

 

[Pandafeet]

I think what should be noted is that Anna thought it was awful enough that she didn't feel physically able to administer the punishment herself! That's what shocks me the most to be honest. She knows it's so bad that she can't do it, yet she needs her personal slave do it to her baby???? That's sick.

Hi! I've come over from the meldrums thread. I work in child protection and to say I am outraged, saddened and very concerned about what I've heard about this family is a huge understatement. I really hope the local authority are taking the referral.

This is the bit that I found so difficult to comprehend. I would never, ever!!! have my husband administer any sort of "punishment" that I wouldn't do myself! She knows it's wrong! She knows that she will be in pain, so why does she allow it????

 

[Yel]

Anyone receiving a cease and desist letter rest assured that its a toothless document. It has no real legal merit. If they are trying to claim its defamatory for the cold showers to be discussed then they must also be aware that a case for defamation must pass the truth test. If people are commenting on what they have put in the public domain, and its of public concern, then no case for defamation would ever succeed.
They are bullies.

Rest assured tattle disregards any meaningless legal threats to delete threads. We have strict rules to protect the site and users so hateful, abusive, threatening or similar messages are the ones that will be deleted. Not people discussing a video from a business account that someone chose to release.

That gluten free cake from the baker will be no healthier than a normal cake, it'll have gluey type additives that could be worse for you. I'm cringing for her that it wasn't spelt flour

 

[Ineedahero]

I saw this couple referenced in another thread and then watched Organused Motherhoods stories. Absolutely appalled at this and more disgusted at the sheeple defending these pricks.

What if this isnt being naughty? What if this kid has sensory issues and is smearing for a reason. Shes 2 ffs. She doesnt necessarily understand what shes doing. To punish for that reason is despicable. And the video from 2017 where their other daughter is talking about punishing her dolly with cold water showers. Chilling.