Rhi, Mummy of Four #2

[RobotLady]

Having given this a little more thought, the constant matching clothes, meal plans and even signing little Z up to Karate because that’s what the others do. Nobody in that house really has been given the chance to have their own identity.
It’s easy enough to say Z has autistic tendencies because she struggles with sensory overload or change in routine, but seriously her little life has been so rigid and it’s all she’s ever known. No wonder she doesn’t cope but there’s a lot more evidence to say that her behaviour is the product of her environment.
Sadly, agencies are swamped with a backlog. Lots of children haven’t coped well with lockdowns and more people than ever are after an EHCP. Everywhere is short-staffed, that’s not new! Rhi is right in that respect, it’s not good enough and services needs to funded sufficiently to provide help for those that need it. But crying on Instagram because you disagree with the professionals is wildly unnecessary. And guess what, stamping your feet and demanding a second and third opinion until you get your own way is taking the opportunity away from another parent desperate for support.
I can’t help but think that this smug, privileged madam, grown up adult is going to get her own way purely because a professional is afraid that their name will be dragged through the mud or they’ll be reprimanded by their superiors for the bad press, bet they’re thinking life would be easier to just her have her own way to get her off their backs.

 

[Dogleggedhat]

Having given this a little more thought, the constant matching clothes, meal plans and even signing little Z up to Karate because that’s what the others do. Nobody in that house really has been given the chance to have their own identity.
It’s easy enough to say Z has autistic tendencies because she struggles with sensory overload or change in routine, but seriously her little life has been so rigid and it’s all she’s ever known. No wonder she doesn’t cope but there’s a lot more evidence to say that her behaviour is the product of her environment.
Sadly, agencies are swamped with a backlog. Lots of children haven’t coped well with lockdowns and more people than ever are after an EHCP. Everywhere is short-staffed, that’s not new! Rhi is right in that respect, it’s not good enough and services needs to funded sufficiently to provide help for those that need it. But crying on Instagram because you disagree with the professionals is wildly unnecessary. And guess what, stamping your feet and demanding a second and third opinion until you get your own way is taking the opportunity away from another parent desperate for support.
I can’t help but think that this smug, privileged madam, grown up adult is going to get her own way purely because a professional is afraid that their name will be dragged through the mud or they’ll be reprimanded by their superiors for the bad press, bet they’re thinking life would be easier to just her have her own way to get her off their backs.

Great posts. I agree that she will probably get her way as they will want rid of her. I used to work in benefits and the amount of times claimants came on hurling abuse and being obnoxious and getting their way because management would jump them ahead of the queue was ridiculous. Personally if someone is being a dick to me I’m much less inclined to want to help.

 

[havesomeclassReb]

Sorry, I’m not a regular lurker; just pop in and out but I’ve a few things to bring to the conversation.
For me the sudden “fight for her child’s rights” has come at a very coincidentally opportune time.
I’m not sure about Orlando as it’s not been relevant to us on our trips there but in Disneyland Paris if you have a disability pass it gives you fast pass or return access to rides for you and 5 others. It gives priority access, seating and reserved space for the parades for only you and 1 other. Currently that would mean only 2 children with statements and 2 others, wouldn’t it be handy to stamp your feet and demand an EHCP.
Secondly, a PROFESSIONAL decision was made not to assess her youngest daughter, to which she took to the internet to cry about how hard done by and exhausted she is by it all.
But surely I’m not the only that can see that if her daughter is assessed and the decision is made that she does not have Autism, Rhi is not going to be happy with that. She is only going to be satisfied with a statement.
In my personal, ex-professional (those days are behind me) opinion; Zara’s behaviour is combination of various factors.
- Large percentage of her childhood in lockdown, she probably barely remembers a time pre-covid.
- Siblings with autistic tendencies, Zara’s behaviour is mirrored from what she observes
- A mum with obsessive behaviour, unable to explore, learn risk and dangers, pandered & molly-coddled, everything has a place..,

There is a vlog that I’ve seen that is just red-flag after red-flag and I hope Z’s teachers and doctors get to see it. It’s a meeting Santa vlog. I think Zara is 3, and Rhi is trying to get her to have a nap whilst the other children play. Squashed into a pram too small, very interesting viewing, but so sad to hear her cry. My children fight their sleep and both my girls would cry when they were overtired, but I certainly wouldn’t have been so forceful.

Oh really, I haven’t seen that vlog, how very sad. So sad. She’s really damaging her children, why can’t she see that. Everything she does is for content. She’s making sure cameras work for her holidays with the children for content. for compete strangers. She seems more bothered about her view count than enjoying holidays with her children. These holidays are booked purely for content.

Her whole life is for content, it’s all a lie. I believe every second of her life is consumed by Instagram/YouTube, every little thing she does and thinks is for that. You can tell that by the things she says. Constant trying new ways of building up her views, It isn’t normal and she needs help!

 

[Dogleggedhat]

I agree Rebs, she is the only person I follow (not saying she is the only one doing it but she is the only one I follow) who posts two potential thumbnails and asks people to choose what they would click on. She said she isn’t doing vlogmas as when she has in the past she has ended up with the same amount of views overall anyway.

She also regularly asks content related questions in her stories. I understand trying to work out what your audience wants but it just makes it all look so contrived-like she is going to scrap her favourites videos because the views are low. Surely if you enjoy making that content you should still do it anyway even if it isn’t watched as much as a haul or vlog?

she also thanked people for supporting her brand work as it allows her to continue to ‘provide us with free content’. I hate this bollocks that influencers spout,as if they are doing us all a massive favour by putting out free content-it’s your audience that gets you your brand work love,you’d get duck all if it wasn’t for your audience.They act as if they are some sort of charity just doing all this content out of the goodness of their heart. No,you are getting freebies and paid work as a result of people watching your content so don’t act like you are doing all us plebs a favour. And if content was behind a paywall and people had to pay to support,you can be sure they wouldn’t be using money to watch a control freak in her late thirties throw tantrums about her children whilst wearing another Disney top and swinging about a loungefly bag.

 

[Zoepenguin]

Great posts @RobotLady and I totally agree. Those kids lives are so regimented and every possible situation is mitigated to an obsessive degree by Rhi. In the words of Frank Gallagher, she's a psychologist's wet dream. I wonder if they're ever allowed to pick their own outfits, get muddy outside, take risks in their play etc.

 

[lc04050607]

Absolutely horrified (but not surprised) to hear that we’re getting a whole vlog dedicated to this whole autism situation.

 

[Pinklady567]

Is she classing sorting and wrapping presents as her work today?
She does realise that people who go to actual work have to find spare time to sort and wrap!
Also does she literally buy the kids everything the same??? It’s like they are not allowed their own personality!!!

 

[lc04050607]

‘i’ve had so many messages asking for X…’

Nope. I don’t buy it. I simply will not believe that she’s inundated with people desperate to
know what her kids are having for Christmas.

 

[Princess 6]

Is she classing sorting and wrapping presents as her work today?
She does realise that people who go to actual work have to find spare time to sort and wrap!
Also does she literally buy the kids everything the same??? It’s like they are not allowed their own personality!!!

Every thing she buys for them it's what Rhi would like to buy for herself ,

 

[Dogleggedhat]

Yea god forbid the kids have a bit of individuality and like things outside of Disney! I have two girls 18 months apart and am so conscious of trying not to dress them the same and force the same things on them as already I can see how different they are and they are only 2.5 and 1.

 

[Lilybobtail]

Why are most of the kids gifts linked to their holiday its Christmas let them have what they want....not bloody pillows for the plane surely you would buy that as a holiday treat not a Christmas gift? I'm not seeing much of the fun of Christmas with their gifts

 

[focusdochas]

I could understand a few small presents connected to the holiday but Will is mad into Lego get him a kit that would challenge him, same with the girls something they enjoy but a step up to challenge. Sad as it sounds my favourite gifts as a kid was books as my dad made an effort to find a book that would challenge me.

 

[RobotLady]

Why are most of the kids gifts linked to their holiday its Christmas let them have what they want....not bloody pillows for the plane surely you would buy that as a holiday treat not a Christmas gift? I'm not seeing much of the fun of Christmas with their gifts

I also thought this, and I’m torn.
One part of me says “yes they are very lucky to be going to America less than a month after Xmas, they should be very grateful for that”.
The other part of me is thinking it’s not really fair, if they were going in June would she be filling their stockings with holiday bits.
They’ll probably get suncream & handheld fans for Xmas, something you’d otherwise buy but because the holiday is in Jan, other stocking fillers are out of the window.
Also you can 100% guarantee when her children see souvenirs and toys in the shops she’ll tell them no and buy them for their birthdays as they are just after the holiday… again you would usually let your children have a little holiday spending money anyway, not save it as a birthday gift.

 

[Pinklady567]

I don’t get why all of a sudden she’s buying so much Disney stuff. All their Christmas gifts are Disney related!! I can’t remember them being this mad on it! It’s so strange

 

[Lilybobtail]

I also thought this, and I’m torn.
One part of me says “yes they are very lucky to be going to America less than a month after Xmas, they should be very grateful for that”.
The other part of me is thinking it’s not really fair, if they were going in June would she be filling their stockings with holiday bits.
They’ll probably get suncream & handheld fans for Xmas, something you’d otherwise buy but because the holiday is in Jan, other stocking fillers are out of the window.
Also you can 100% guarantee when her children see souvenirs and toys in the shops she’ll tell them no and buy them for their birthdays as they are just after the holiday… again you would usually let your children have a little holiday spending money anyway, not save it as a birthday gift.

And with most of it being from Primark it's usually a better price...a lot of it seems very practical and I do agree we shouldn't be wasting money but the kids must be asking for other things slime, daft board games, things they don't need and as parents we usually hate but it's Christmas...maybe that's just my wee one!

 

[Dogleggedhat]

I’m laughing at the thought of Rhi letting slime get within a five mile ratio of her house. Don’t get me wrong,I hate all the messy stuff kids are into and hate when my kid wants to paint or do crafts because she’s so little and it’s a complete mess but she loves it and it’s fantastic for her so i suck it up,put an old shower curtain down and let her do what she’s doing.

she usually has all these categories for gifts for the kids but all their stuff she has shown seems to fall under the same umbrella. The only time the kids get to do something else is when Rhi is getting paid for it.

Everything about those kids lives is structured to the nth degree and to me it’s more for Rhi’s benefit than the kids. My kids have a semi strict routine but there aren’t limits on their play and when we are out for walks etc if their clothes get dirty then who cares? the kids raincoats/wellies are fancier than my kids fancy clothes lol but maybe that says more about me than Rhi!

edit to say that I have annoyed myself with how much I have used the word kid/kids in one post!

 

[Lilybobtail]

I put cling film over my coffee table and pray haha my little one is 5 and not one sensible gift has been requested I always try to buy quality and things that will last when we can I think Rhi needs to take a step back and think if its what the kids want? Plus for how much the Disney toys are she could have had double what is there...its very over priced!

 

[Givemethetea]

Found it weird she said will is getting the joint Disney castle with the two girls! Let him have his own identity I’m sure he will play with it- but Jesus!!!! Like someone said above rhe has bought all the gifts she would want as a child

 

[Mable93]

Found it weird she said will is getting the joint Disney castle with the two girls! Let him have his own identity I’m sure he will play with it- but Jesus!!!! Like someone said above rhe has bought all the gifts she would want as a child

Really strange Will wants it makes me think has he actually said that or is she just forcing it on him! My 9 and 10 year old have phones/ Lego/ acrylic paints/ boxing equipment this year for Xmas her poor children aren’t allowed their own interests so so sad for them!

 

[RobotLady]

My eldest is a 9 year old girl. She understands the magic now, somebody spilled the beans at school earlier in the year. She’s been amazing! This year has weirdly been one of the best already! She is keen to keep the spirit of Christmas alive for her younger siblings. When her 7 year old brother asked how quickly Santa moves in one night, she was quick on her feet and came up with an explanation faster than I could.
She’s also been helping me with the elf! I hid the elf in the fruit bowl, when I came down in the morning, Barbie was wrapped in a toilet roll wedding dress, with a toilet roll aisle and flower petals were strewn everywhere.
She has asked for a top or trainers this year, now that she knows who she’s asking she doesn’t want to ask for much! Believe I’m giving her both and more. I can’t imagine the stick he must get at school with his mum broadcasting that he’s asked Santa for a Disney Princess castle. 9 year olds can be ruthless and some are more grown up than we’d like them to be. Trust me, I’m all for keeping children as children for as long as possible and not allowing them to grow up too quickly but I’m dead against forcing them to be a puppet without considering for a second the consequences it will have amongst their peers.
And… I honestly have to say, I’ve nothing against boys playing with princesses or castles at all! But I truly believe W is playing the part his mum has assigned him and is “liking” what she has told him to like; just to satisfy her.