Pleasing everyone at Christmas

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I am so so fed up with trying to make everyone else happy this Christmas and therefore dreading the day with the kids. There are only my two kids in our family and the other 12 adults are so selfish, they think the kids are there purely for them and their enjoyment.
 
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So stop. Stop trying to please everyone. It’s an impossible task.

Focus on yourself & your kids. That’s it. duck everyone else! The rest of them are adults right? They can sort themselves out. Stop putting the pressure on you, it’s not worth it. Christmas is 1 day out of a whole year. That’s all.
 
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I am so so fed up with trying to make everyone else happy this Christmas and therefore dreading the day with the kids. There are only my two kids in our family and the other 12 adults are so selfish, they think the kids are there purely for them and their enjoyment.
What are they doing?

Family can be a nightmare sometimes.
 
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It’s ONE DAY!
Literally ONE. Consumerism pushes all these expectations and pressure on everyone to be grandeur, to be the perfect host with a feast, spectacular presents & oodles of alcohol! Really Christmas is how YOU want it. This is the first year I’ve dreaded Christmas, truly. I do not feel festive, I felt an anxiety ridden mess and it wasn’t until I had given myself a good talking to that I felt better.

If people don’t like how you do Christmas well f*ck em!
I’m not spending all day in the kitchen this year, I’m not getting dolled up, nor stressing that the presents I’ve gifted are good enough it’s like it or lump it. I really hope you can find peace with it like I have. Be selfish! And have a good one! Xx
 
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I am so so fed up with trying to make everyone else happy this Christmas and therefore dreading the day with the kids. There are only my two kids in our family and the other 12 adults are so selfish, they think the kids are there purely for them and their enjoyment.
Same. My in laws like to take over but we've put our foot down and will be spending Christmas how we want to, for our son. I'm not looking back in 20 years and regretting missing out on time with him to please others. we will see them but we wont be spending all our time with them.
 
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I was trying to please everyone last year. It all came to a head when my mother in law decided everyone was going to spend it at her house, where my kids being the youngest, get totally eclipsed and would have ended up with their cousins opening their presents (as it nearly happened at their birthday) and having to follow her strict routine of no presents until after dinner and the children eating separately. I put my foot down and said we’re spending it how we wanted too. She wasn’t happy but it’s my family and that was what we wanted to do.

I started early this year saying we’re spending it at home where the kids can have their presents whenever they want and we’ll do it our way.
 
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It's impossible. You will never please everyone. I followed my dad's rule. As i was adopted and they had waited almost 20 years for kids his rule was that Christmas Day was for me, my sister and my mum and dad and NO ONE ELSE. We would visit/have visiors from Boxing Day onwards and if we werent in -tough. He would allow the occasional neighbour in (his bessie from next door to partake in a whiskey in his shed)

My rule was the same other than if i actually wanted someone there. It is a stressful day enough so just enjoy it with who you want to share it with

Mr Practically Perfect found out to his cost, not to mess with me on Christmas Day as i am a stress head and when he was late returning from the pub for his christmas 'drink'(came in bladdered) i casually threw his requested Prawn Cocktail in his face and threw him out.

We still all chuckle remembering his little face squished on the widow with cocktail sauce dripping down his noggin in the rain BUT I WAS VERY STRESSED AND ANGRY. ha ha He has been on his best behaviour since.
 
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Families are a pain in the arse! Nobody can make you feel guilty like they can! I know that doesn't help but i thought I'd put my 2 pence worth in!
 
It's really hard. My husband is an only child and insists we go to his parents every year which is a 4 hour drive. I've always grit my teeth with the odd moan but now we have a toddler I really can't be arsed dragging everything there. It's always boring, the food is always not to my taste. It's not the sort of 'everyone chip in' Christmas which I wouldnt mind, it's always how his mum wants it. They're the sort that open presents in the evening! I said we weren't going this year and she made a big fuss and made us feel guilty so now we are. I just want to sit around watching crap on tv, playing board games and a decent roast 😂 I want to be able to start our own traditions not always do someone else's!
 
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We have 3 sets of parents to see over Christmas and every year we get the guilt trip from his mum about how she is on her own and no one bothers with her at Christmas.... I mean the woman moved in 3 houses down from us but apparently that’s not enough 🙄🙄 my mum even invited her and my sister in law over for the day so she wouldn’t feel left out...and my mum can’t stand her lol
All I want to do at Christmas is veg in front of the tv watching tit on tv and eating my weight in chocolate 😂 but that will never be an option. I get people get lonely at Christmas but laying it on thick and making people feel guilty Just makes people resentful towards you. For some perspective my mil has had 4 failed marriages so this time of year is not good for her. Also my self and my partner do shift work which nobody seems to understand that sometimes because of this we only get that one day before we are back at work!
 
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You can't please everyone and people need to get over it.

It will just be me, my fiance and the dog at Christmas and I am quite happy about it. We will have a lie-in, stay in our pjs and watch some good tv shows.
 
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I love Christmas but it can be a nightmare if you have family members you don't get on with or that rub you up the wrong way( we all have at least one). You cant please everyone so don't even try and remember Christmas lunch is just a sunday lunch with a cracker.
 
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I've given up on keeping everyone happy. If I'm hosting I do my best to host a nice event. If I'm a guest I do my best to go with the flow and be nice through until I decide to leave. If people still have a problem with some facet of my behavior I've decided that that is just their problem and I can't control people who are irrational or hellbent on finding an issue.

I have a family that, unfortunately, operates on a system of passive aggressive displays and guilt trips. I decided earlier this year that I'm simply not going to participate or even acknowledge the tension anymore.
 
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Don't try. Cannot be done, the only person you have to please is yourself and your immediate family.
 
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you can never please everyone. Someone will always be unhappy even when you try your hardest, so I've decided not to try hard this year. No visiting anyone, let the kids enjoy their day at home with their new toys!
 
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I threatened to burn the house with all the gifts in it last night.
So, it’s going well here 😂😂
Husband hates Christmas and just doesn’t contribute bar pointing out how we need to deep clean for HIS parents coming.
Im now on strike, not a gift will be bought or food item organised. They can come to my house as it normally is and eat frozen pizza for all I care atm.
 
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We doing no Christmas gift and everyone contributes an amount to gift for a friends of mines cancer treatment. Must say it relieves a lot of stress. I live in South Africa, so we have a nice outdoor summer lunch in garden with friends.
 
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So I told my in laws today we would be up early christmas morning for our visit as last year we didnt get to even start cooking til into the afternoon. We were basically screamed at and told that it wasnt good enough that they are never priority (no, my sons Christmas is) and saying they supposed we would see mu family more (actually no they will be with my brothers family 2 hours away). I've come away physically shaking and upset and my husband is livid. Merry bleeping christmas
 
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Don’t judge me but I always plan A chest infection or ear ache “coming on” at about 5.30 on Christmas Day...

I will take part for the kids sake,
then duck off like an influencer who’s realised adsense season is over 🙂
 
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So I told my in laws today we would be up early christmas morning for our visit as last year we didnt get to even start cooking til into the afternoon. We were basically screamed at and told that it wasnt good enough that they are never priority (no, my sons Christmas is) and saying they supposed we would see mu family more (actually no they will be with my brothers family 2 hours away). I've come away physically shaking and upset and my husband is livid. Merry bleeping christmas
Tell them to duck off
 
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