Parents of teenagers!

[Summer2011]

@HumphreyB yeah she’s always been difficult. It’s just reached an all time high with starting secondary school last September. Currently awaiting an appointment with a therapist as requested by her school.
yes going to have a chat with her tonight. Going to enforce a bed time & routine, she desperately lacks one. I don’t feel like she fully understands the need to look after herself properly.
do you use an app to keep track of their screen time. This is something I 100% need!
i agree with the give & take comment as I feel like I’m giving far too much and being walked all over. Thank you for responding I really appreciate it x

 

[HumphreyB]

@Summer2011 its screen time on my iphone. if you go into settings you can see your screen time. we set up family and added the kids. so we
control their apps. if they want a new app the requests comes to us first. we have to approve. same with their usage. it’s a little fiddly to start but once it’s up and running it’s great. our friends had it and recommended when we were having issues around their phone use

 

[boatofbubbles]

Anybody else counting down the days til back to school?

 

[HumphreyB]

Anybody else counting down the days til back to school?

yes

 

[Dizzy]

Anybody else counting down the days til back to school?

HELL YES!!

 

[Kim Mild]

My teenager is off to college for the first time today . They are a bit nervous cos it's all new to them .

I didn't want to say anything to them , but they have nicer clothes They could wear instead of the scruffy ones they've put on .

I'm also not sure how much they'll have to pay for bus fare as the under 21 special price has just changed and the bus drivers probably just end up charging adult fare.

 

[Rodneytrotter]

My teenager is off to college for the first time today . They are a bit nervous cos it's all new to them .

I didn't want to say anything to them , but they have nicer clothes They could wear instead of the scruffy ones they've put on .

I'm also not sure how much they'll have to pay for bus fare as the under 21 special price has just changed and the bus drivers probably just end up charging adult fare.

Aww I hope today goes well for them

 

[Kim Mild]

Aww I hope today goes well for them

Thank you . College is such a big change .

 

[boatofbubbles]

My son goes into year 9 this week. I recently received a letter from the council saying he could apply to go to a different type of school (offered at universities or studio schools) although within reasonable travel distance something I wouldn't agree with ( child "may " baby so one of the youngest) has anyone heard of this? I know education Is now to 18 rather than 16 but this is something I haven't heard of

 

[justhavinganoseynow]

A girl my daughters age is leaving school now to go to one of these training colleges. I originally thought they were for naughty kids who couldn’t stay in mainstream school but it sounds good from the way the mum described it.
I personally think if they’re completely miserable in school then yes it is a good alternative; however it sounds exactly the same as college but at 14 years old and I think I’d rather just let them be a school kid and do school kid things amongst their peers rather than having them rushing into the next phase 2 years early.
When I went to college I loved it. Free periods spent in the pub and mooching around town for hours. But these aren’t things that are suitable for 14 year olds whilst the rest of the kids their age are at school

 

[Dizzy]

My friends son did this and got on so well. He did an engineering qualification and is now halfway through an apprenticeship with a huge employer in the area, loving it and progressing really well. Before he went to college, there was a definite risk of him going off the rails (lack of a positive male influence in his life, in with the wrong crowd, getting involved with drugs) and it has honestly been the making of him. The college looked after him brilliantly - from what my friend said, the kids on these these courses aren't just left to their own devices, they are managed much more than the kids a couple of years older.

 

[Summer2011]

I’m at my whits end, just had a phone call from the school to say another parent has called up concerned about her daughter’s behaviour and while checking her phone is now concerned about my daughter. She’s Up sending messages until all hours of the night, screen shotting pornographic images off websites and sending them, there was also a video over the weekend of my daughter smoking (unsure if it was a vape or an actual cigarette) but she’s out of control. Feel like I can’t take her phone, as I work full time and she’s responsible for getting herself to and from school (I don’t get home until after 6) feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and it’s making me so unhappy. I’m fed up of her attitude, her entitlement, her behaviour - everything is determined about how she feels and I’m sick of walking on eggshells because of her. If anyone could help or offer an advice I’d much appreciate it

 

[Megansnarkle]

I’m at my whits end, just had a phone call from the school to say another parent has called up concerned about her daughter’s behaviour and while checking her phone is now concerned about my daughter. She’s Up sending messages until all hours of the night, screen shotting pornographic images off websites and sending them, there was also a video over the weekend of my daughter smoking (unsure if it was a vape or an actual cigarette) but she’s out of control. Feel like I can’t take her phone, as I work full time and she’s responsible for getting herself to and from school (I don’t get home until after 6) feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and it’s making me so unhappy. I’m fed up of her attitude, her entitlement, her behaviour - everything is determined about how she feels and I’m sick of walking on eggshells because of her. If anyone could help or offer an advi ce I’d much appreciate it

It doesn't address the root behaviour but at least take her phone away overnight.

 

[Hinchhater1442]

Definitely sit down and explain why it’s not appropriate. Have a cut off time for her phone to be handed over to you until morning. (You could also be checking the phone regularly but I’m not sure where I stand with this personally, so wouldn’t necessarily advise it)

 

[Summer2011]

My daughter currently has no technology and is grounded. What does everyone’s 12 year olds do to entertain themselves? Does anyone have any suggestions of books to read? Activities - I’m sick of hearing I’m bored and it’s only been 36 hours

 

[Megansnarkle]

My daughter currently has no technology and is grounded. What does everyone’s 12 year olds do to entertain themselves? Does anyone have any suggestions of books to read? Activities - I’m sick of hearing I’m bored and it’s only been 36 hours

It isn't your job to provide alternative entertainment during a punishment. If she has access to a shelf full of books or a library card then she's perfectly capable of finding a book herself. Alternatively she can come up with something she'd like to do. It's healthy for kids to be bored sometimes and far too easy for technology to be a solution.

 

[samwilzrhcp]

I’m at my whits end, just had a phone call from the school to say another parent has called up concerned about her daughter’s behaviour and while checking her phone is now concerned about my daughter. She’s Up sending messages until all hours of the night, screen shotting pornographic images off websites and sending them, there was also a video over the weekend of my daughter smoking (unsure if it was a vape or an actual cigarette) but she’s out of control. Feel like I can’t take her phone, as I work full time and she’s responsible for getting herself to and from school (I don’t get home until after 6) feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and it’s making me so unhappy. I’m fed up of her attitude, her entitlement, her behaviour - everything is determined about how she feels and I’m sick of walking on eggshells because of her. If anyone could help or offer an advice I’d much appreciate it

Get her an old retro phone that doesn’t have access to the internet, think they do new versions of the old Nokias.