Noise anxiety

[under the ivy]

I’ve found my people. Loud noises make me anxious especially coming from other people. I have loud neighbours and I can’t describe the anxiety I get when I hear their music, kids screaming, doors slamming. I feel like I’m being unreasonable as everyone makes noise, but it’s a weird dread I get. I never play my music or have my TV on loud for the same reasons. I have BPD and always thought it was part of that.

 

[lemonlime]

Noise bothers everyone but even the sounds that can objectively be considered as tolerable or normal stress me out to the point of triggering and anxiety attack in me sometimes. I think this was triggered during a long lasting noise issue with my downstairs neighbour's dickhead son, who used to play multiplayer video games late into the night and had no idea how loud his screeching and chatter through his headset was. Multiple requests of piping the fuck down, banging on the radiator pipes, nothing solved the issue until the shithead finally got married and moved the hell out. I think it was a stressful time for me in general and this noise thing just made things a lot worse. Even the memory of it makes me furious, but I think it also created a connection with anxiety and any kind of unwanted sound in my head, and I can't break the cycle.

Just to mention, dogs barking etc. doesn't trigger the same kind of response. Yes, it is annoying but I don't go into a fight or flight mindset, whereas even people having a conversation outside with a fairly normal volume makes me uncomfortable. This inclused music that people play, so I guess it has something to do with people related noises of any kind. Currently I am having to sit through the sound of an open air performance thing that's happening somewhere close-ish. It is loud af yes, but also when I close the windows, it's like a low, "someone is listening to techno music through their headphones in the next table" kind of noise. A normal person could probably ignore this to a degree and the concert music does need to stop at midnight, so I know that there is a deadline. Doesn't matter. Children screaming, neighbours being loud on their yards or balconies, someone playing music that is loud enough for me to hear, coworkers speaking loudly, neighbours running too hard, absolutely any human related sound whatsoever. It's causing me so much stress and anxiety. Back when this downstairs noise was happening, my therapist gave me the ingenious (!) solution of speaking to me neighbours about it, whereas I don't want to fix the source of the noise, as this is not an option all the time and my reaction doesn't isn't even limited to objectively bothersome noises. I just don't want to react to sound this way, regardless of what I'm hearing.

Google has not been my friend as my suspected case of 'misophonia' isn't even recognised as an issue on its own, but a barely acknowleged symptom of OCD. Anyone having trouble with this, or something similar? Has anyone found a lasting solution (that doesn't involve warning offenders because it's not an option)?

 

[Medusah80]

I am going to follow this thread as you have just described me.

 

[whoareyouu]

I have found my people. I can’t stand two sources of noise at the same time.

 

[Cosmo]

I have C-PTSD and loud noise is like torture to me.

I bought Bose QC noise cancelling headphones. They are awesome. I wear them most of the time and if noise is really bad I put actual earplugs in, the headphones on and play white noise. Genuinely can't hear a thing.

One thing that I researched and has genuinely made a massive difference is magnesium supplements. If you Google it there's lots of information about the link between magnesium deficiency and misophonia. Since regularly supplementing with magnesium citrate powder I'd say my tolerance for noise has improved dramatically.

Magnesium has made a massive difference overall to my mental health in general, I actually feel like my brain is functioning better but it definitely helped me deal with noise better. I now kind of observe the noise rather than instantly lose it over noise. I can be more logical about it and choose what to do about it rather than just completely losing it and spiralling.

I really recommend it for this problem and hope what I've learned might help someone.

 

[Souffle]

Noise bothers everyone but even the sounds that can objectively be considered as tolerable or normal stress me out to the point of triggering and anxiety attack in me sometimes. I think this was triggered during a long lasting noise issue with my downstairs neighbour's dickhead son, who used to play multiplayer video games late into the night and had no idea how loud his screeching and chatter through his headset was. Multiple requests of piping the fuck down, banging on the radiator pipes, nothing solved the issue until the shithead finally got married and moved the hell out. I think it was a stressful time for me in general and this noise thing just made things a lot worse. Even the memory of it makes me furious, but I think it also created a connection with anxiety and any kind of unwanted sound in my head, and I can't break the cycle.

Just to mention, dogs barking etc. doesn't trigger the same kind of response. Yes, it is annoying but I don't go into a fight or flight mindset, whereas even people having a conversation outside with a fairly normal volume makes me uncomfortable. This inclused music that people play, so I guess it has something to do with people related noises of any kind. Currently I am having to sit through the sound of an open air performance thing that's happening somewhere close-ish. It is loud af yes, but also when I close the windows, it's like a low, "someone is listening to techno music through their headphones in the next table" kind of noise. A normal person could probably ignore this to a degree and the concert music does need to stop at midnight, so I know that there is a deadline. Doesn't matter. Children screaming, neighbours being loud on their yards or balconies, someone playing music that is loud enough for me to hear, coworkers speaking loudly, neighbours running too hard, absolutely any human related sound whatsoever. It's causing me so much stress and anxiety. Back when this downstairs noise was happening, my therapist gave me the ingenious (!) solution of speaking to me neighbours about it, whereas I don't want to fix the source of the noise, as this is not an option all the time and my reaction doesn't isn't even limited to objectively bothersome noises. I just don't want to react to sound this way, regardless of what I'm hearing.

Google has not been my friend as my suspected case of 'misophonia' isn't even recognised as an issue on its own, but a barely acknowleged symptom of OCD. Anyone having trouble with this, or something similar? Has anyone found a lasting solution (that doesn't involve warning offenders because it's not an option)?

I feel like this too. My family doesn’t really understand why I get so, so angry or upset over noise. I believe I have misophonia as I can’t stand the sound of people eating but, like you, I had some horrific neighbour issues which have made me react even worse to some noises.
I’ve even wished myself to be deaf sometimes as noise can really put me in a bad place. If the neighbours were being loud and I couldn’t ‘escape’ the sound of their shouting or their music etc it would make me more and more anxious to the point where I’d be crying and then taking it out on my boyfriend.
I feel for you because it really is not nice to feel like this xx

 

[Cosmo]

Sorry if this is a silly question but I have CPTSD too and hyper vigilance as a result, would you say the magnesium helped with that too? Thank you for the tip x

Totally. I take half a teaspoon of Magnesium Citrate powder a day in a pint of squash. It has an instantly calming effect on me.

The thing with PTSD I have found is that your brain has been overloaded and all the stress is trapped in your body. The magnesium has so many benefits as it relaxes muscles, helps the brain by protecting it from stress signals, helps the body to function properly.

Apparently Magnesium L-theronate is better for mental health because it crosses the blood brain barrier easier but I've got a massive tub of the citrate from Holland and Barrett which I'm using up.

It has 100% helped my hypervigilance because I was a strung out mess. The only way I can describe it is as though I have a glimpse of what it's like to have a "normal" brain, which I thought I'd never have.

The other thing that has dramatically helped me is intense cardio exercise. I believe half the problem with stress is the adrenaline your body releases and the only effective way I've found to deal with that is cardio. Your body wants to fight or flight so I pound it out until I'm so tired I'm calm again. Cardio genuinely works wonders for me.

Another thing that helps me is L-theanine, it stopped me having nightmares which I'd had pretty much all my life. This meant I could actually sleep without being petrified, which then meant my brain got a rest and really helped my general state of mind.

I did therapy for 2 years but it has been since I put my efforts into addressing the trauma stuck in the cells of my body that I've started to see dramatic change. The body is key, I think, to managing stress and PTSD not necessarily the mind.

Hope that helps x

 

[getmeoutofhere]

I’ve had similar to this for a while and after countless googling came to the conclusion of misophonia as well.

For me it’s repetitive noise like a pet constantly licking or someone eating loudly, things like someone constantly tapping their foot. I know it’s irrational but just want to scream when it happens.

Unfortunately it’s not really a known thing and I spoke to someone about it who’s advice was to expose myself to it in order to overcome it, which is easier said than done.

 

[spangly]

I've had this all my life but thought it was one of my quirks until my Son told me recently that it is a symptom of OCD. I suffer from severe anxiety and depression anyway but had never really linked it to that.
My neighbours are quite bad at the moment (I think I've figured out that it's their stair gates slamming that really gets to me) I've had to change my bedroom around to move my bed away from the wall and I wear earplugs all night which is really helping. I've altered my sleeping pattern to match theirs too so that I don't get too distressed if I wake up at 6.30 now!
I can't cope if there are two different loud noise sources at the same time - it really confuses me and I have to turn something off or remove myself from the situation or sometimes cover my ears (I try not to do that in public...lol!)

It's interesting to know that it's actually a thing!

 

[Souffle]

White noise can really help. If I put my fan on I can barely hear any external noise. Phone apps with white noise do the same thing

 

[blackmasque]

I have misophonia and noise hypersensitivity due to ptsd and fibromyalgia. Loud noise can even trigger a migraine. I can't deal with loud, sudden, or repetitive noise. (My husband has an awful hand tapping habit that sends me into a blind rage every time he starts tap tap tapping.) I either try to get away from the noise or avoid it if i can. If not, I use ear plugs and do grounding exercises and box breathing. I wish I had a more effective solution.

 

[howsonisnow]

Hate hearing the sounds of people crunching on a pack of crisps, eating cereal loudly, picking their nails etc. If someones in the same room eating loudly, I have to turn on the tv/radio to try and drown out the sound

 

[openbook1]

I've had misophonia since I was a child. I remember noises annoying me but not knowing why. My husband is a really noisy person but unintentionally and it drives me mad. When he's concentrating he breathes loud through his nose . When he sleeps he snore and his mouth makes a horrible noise. He has a habit of clearing his throat a lot. He cracks his knuckles. All drive me mad.
We have a French bulldog and his grumbling can drive me insane too. It will sound mad, but sometimes I feel like I am going to snap. My husband and I have actually got into arguments because of his "loud" breathing and throat clearing. When I sit doing nothing, I am just silent but he isn't and he's not even overweight!
The ticking of clocks also really irritates me, more if I am trying to sleep. I got custom ear plugs which are brilliant for night time.

 

[House of Tea]

I have C-PTSD and loud noise is like torture to me.

I bought Bose QC noise cancelling headphones. They are awesome. I wear them most of the time and if noise is really bad I put actual earplugs in, the headphones on and play white noise. Genuinely can't hear a thing.

One thing that I researched and has genuinely made a massive difference is magnesium supplements. If you Google it there's lots of information about the link between magnesium deficiency and misophonia. Since regularly supplementing with magnesium citrate powder I'd say my tolerance for noise has improved dramatically.

Magnesium has made a massive difference overall to my mental health in general, I actually feel like my brain is functioning better but it definitely helped me deal with noise better. I now kind of observe the noise rather than instantly lose it over noise. I can be more logical about it and choose what to do about it rather than just completely losing it and spiralling.

I really recommend it for this problem and hope what I've learned might help someone.

Interesting.

I have misophonia - noisy eaters, running water, typing on keyboard. But neighbour noise really raisesthe anxiety levels. It is the lack of control over it. Half of you is enraged about the lack of consideration.

My tolerance to noise has worsened as I got older. Probably yet another menopause symptom.

 

[ItsMeMelZ]

I have this too. My main triggers are nasal breathing, lip smacking, slopping while eating and any repetitive noise really. People think you're demented or you're making it up. I had someone tell me that I couldn't have misophonia because I'm a noisy person and therefore I'd drive myself insane Noone seems to understand this awful affliction. The sufferer rarely triggers themselves and its not one size fits all. Your ticks are not necessarily mine. Like other have said it gets worse when you have no control, like an inconsiderate neighbour allowing excess noise. A person without Misophonia can usually ignore it or drown it out, but for sufferers it can get in on you and send you into meltdown mode. I find I have no concentration in a meeting when someone breathes loudly or clicks a pen. If someone sits near me on public transport chewing gum I want to hurl myself out the window and I cant understand how grown adults chew with their mouth open or think its acceptable to snort snot into the back of their throat in public

 

[rebremm99]

Joining this thread because I have this too. I think mine was triggered when I got my job, I knew I would have to be waking up at 3am to do intensive work and would get so stressed about not sleeping that any noise like loud music/ dogs repetitively barking would give me really bad anxiety.
I use white noise to sleep now and find it great, but I still get such bad anxiety when I can hear any loud background noise around the time I’m going to bed. It’s honestly so annoying and nobody in my family understands!

 

[Jelly Bean]

It’s a bloody lottery isn’t it. It takes one arsehole to arrive and loads of people are infected by their selfishness. I would like there to be stronger measures taken against noise polluters. It can massively effect a lot of people but almost isn’t taken seriously. And boundaries are pushed all the time, more potential for noise. There now seems to be a fad for watch large TVs in gardens. So never mind the neighbours who might want to use their outside space, let’s all pile over Dave’s and watch a loud action movie at full blast. The neighbours can listen to our shit film choice.

New to this thread
What you say is so true. I watched a few years ago gardening makeover programmes where people, often with close neighbours, were encouraged to make their gardens 'entertainment' spaces, with TVs, bars, music speakers. It made me feel quite sick tbh thinking of the poor neighbours.
I'm so sensitive to noise it can be debilitating. Neighbour noise, music, loud TVs, children kicking footballs endlessly in the street, hedge trimmers, machinery. Anxiety and nausea immediately kicks in. Sometimes even I know it is unreasonable. A minor example. We rented, and a few years ago moved to a beautiful little detached cottage in the countryside (after living in towns/cities which became unbearable noise wise for me - I used to live in earplugs). There was one house next door owned by an elderly couple. Anyway one of the first evenings there we sat outside for our dinner and the next door neighbour was in his garden, then put his radio on playing music Radio 2 style. It wasn't too loud or anything, but I could hear it and it triggered a response of nausea and panic that I know was out of proportion. It made the entire move suddenly seem a dreadful mistake and I just wanted to cry and hide in bed with the pillow over my head. My partner was understandably completely bewildered.
I have thought about hypnotherapy to try to stop hypersensitivity. I just don't get how other people tolerate noise I find so jarring. Nobody else I know seems to be as affected.
I will definitely try the magnesium tip suggested earlier.

 

[Sheeeet]

I have misophonia and tinnitus, and the couple of people I have met IRL also had both together, but then my partner knows someone who has the misophonia without the tinnitus so there goes/went my theory!

From what I've seen from googling over the years, the best practical advice is exposure therapy but I've not looked for, nor seen any therapists who do this.

When there's a situation that makes the makes the misophonia flare over days, it's quite disabling in terms of insomnia, loss of appetite and anxiety. It's definitely about lack of control as the noise is always external.

I've previously requested (and got) an office move at work before, as I was off with stress thanks to what we'll call coworkers having radio wars coinciding with other life factors. Am now thankfully in a silent office and mostly alone thanks to post covid wfh. If not for the move, I think I'd have left the job. Of course I listen to quiet music via one headphone but it's different when you have control over it.

For short bursts of avoiding external noise at home, I use noise cancelling earbuds or foam earplugs along with ear defenders - seems extreme, I know but it makes it manageable. If anyone finds any therapist or link to guide us, please let us know! I have a feeling it'd involve relaxation/ mindfulness/ meditation exercises when the noise occurs. I don't know about anyone else, but I think it's the last thing I'd be capable of in the face of unrelenting noise! All the more reason to try though, I suppose *sigh*

Good luck, fellow misophonics! May the world come to STFU with that racket sooner rather than later

 

[Bexybest]

Interesting thread, a lot of it resonates with me.

I've also had terrible neighbours in the past and moved because of them. However now I am super worried about us making noise in our new house, incase it upsets the neighbours!

My partner will stomp around, slam the front door, put the TV on loud and I am constantly having a moan at him trying to describe how uncomfortable it makes me feel.

I'd actually not mind if my neighbours made a bit of noise now (they are silent) as I might not be as paranoid as I am now.

 

[37BBL]

I totally didn't know this was a thing. You've described myself though, almost down to a T.
I had a very bad neighbour experience in our first house. Continously playing loud music during my first pregnancy and all of my maternity leave. It ruined my whole maternity leave, there was not one day where I didn't leave the house as I felt so anxious there. It put such a strain on my relationship and we ended up selling and moving far quicker than we had planned. I look back on our first home with horrible memories.

Every time I hear loud music now, those feelings come back. My husband thinks it's silly, as we don't live anywhere near there now and we are in a detached house on a street with only 8 houses. Its so hard to explain, but certain songs which are bassy trigger me, a car outside with loud music, if we're out somewhere and I hear bassy music it takes me back to those feelings.