Monday Coffee Moaning. Let's see if this day's episode isn't as taxing as yesterday's shall we? (I'm not betting on it.) Just under 1000 watching.
Loads of chattering. Mark complains of the ASMR quality that Nads is bringing to the live. She is eating toast with peanut butter, he tells her to go somewhere else with it. Nads leaves to go get "her favourite peanut butter in the whole world" Manilife double roast. Talk about shave Mark's head. (Weren't you supposed to have done that a couple of days ago?
For the vlog, remember that thing?) Mark complains of an itchy knee. Nads says she has done something terrible to her knee, "I can't even kneel on it." Oh here we go..Mark has something he wants to say before we go on. It's about a comment that came out after the No Shame Sunday Show. Avril Butcher asked for a birthday song as she is/was 76, leaves loads of comments but never seem to be seen, I keep trying. Nads says "Oh Avril!" Nads sings. No she doesn't she wants to apologize first, comments flying up so fast. (They do.) Now singing. Photobox have discontinued the version of card they make (EU issue) so they have to change the style of care they send out now. Another apology regarding the NSSS, Mark fucked up his editing. Nads went from plastering chocolate on a cookie sheet to finished cake. "He was mortified!" Editing chat. Question: Would you prefer me to edit the whole NSSS or do a separate clip? Nads leaves to get the cake. The cake was cut wonky.
Write down Sue Thorpe's B-day. Chat about Captain Tom's COVID. He was in Barbados at Xmas. (Well he is 100) People refusing to go on ventilators in ICU. Skye Elise is recuperating. Claire Ross Reade's B-day. Questions: Can we or will we be normal by summer. Nads is optimistic. They say they/we will be staycationing. John Campbell variant talk. 16 flights a day to and from LA to UK. Chat about Maddie and her long COVID. Nads asks
once again if anyone has any remedies for the lack of taste and smell. (
chunters to self "take her to an ENT person already" ) Nads ponders about the possibility of losing her taste and smell. Mark goes into Gogglebox Nutty mode. "Oh my God, what if that happens?" Mark:"Let's not worry about something that hasn't happened yet." "It's happened to Maddie." Talk about the rest of them having the antibodies.
Nads asking if anyone knows if Maddie had it then will they have the antibodies. Someone mentions having it and not being able to breathe through their nose now. Talk about Mark not being able to breath through his nose for yoga. Nads:"That's not good." Mark:"I put it down to the idea that most of the hair that is growing in my body is in my nostrils." (Interesting theory...NOT!) "But I don't know, it's not for sure." Guiness and a vindaloo is a suggestion. Nads:"She can bite into a whole onion and not taste it at all. Everything tastes of chemicals and she can smell the worst smells, like farts." Deborah suggests he might have a polyp up his nose. (DOES ANYONE IN THIS CHAT EVER TELL THEM TO GET TO THE DOCTOR, JESUS TAP DANCING CHRIST!) "What is a polyp?" ask Mark. (A POLYP IS A GROWTH DUMB DUMB!) Nads :"They are little things." (how descriptive) Long haul COVID symptoms chat. Melanie came back from a dog walk in Crystal Palace. M&N in unison "Was it packed?"
More COVID chat. Nads calls the variant a "clever fucker." "It's like a living thing with a brain."
(Stay in school kids.) "It freaks me out." UFO mothership seen in LA. (why is that not surprising?) Mark goes on about aliens being in corporeal forms. Nads:"Corporeal, what a lovely word, what does it mean?"
DEEP THOUGHTS WITH....NADIA SAWALHA. Mark: "Why do we assume that? What if an alien is unseeable?"
Nads blames Emma for the alian chat, "We were having a good news day today." Sanjay says that aliens are likely to be microbes. Mark makes a film suggestion, if you want to scare the
tit out of yourself "Life." Chatters asking what happened to the Joe Swash cooking yesterday. Nads got a test from him yesterday, "Nads is there any way we can do this thing tomorrah, only Stacey had me go here, there. So it might be tonight, unless Joe gets himself into a pickle again. TUESDAY IS WHEN MARK COOKS. He will be doning something and flipping a pancake. Nads:"What's that song Starship Trooper?" Random. Question: Would you go abroad this year if you could? Vast majority say NOOOOOO. Nads says we will have to forget about Cornwall this summer. "How about Yorkshire?" The Dig, getting good reviews. ( I saw this and I will say it would have been a good film, if not for that stupid romantic subplot.) "The Lakes, the Lakes, oh the Lakes, was that the one where the couple had the baaybee?" Mark:"They are talking about the Lakes..to visit."
"Oh! I thought it was a drama, I've always wanted to go ever, ever. Mark is lukewarm about going there." (He can't handle it oop North!) Mark mentions traffic there. Yorkshire Dales. Mark feels the Lakes are more traficky, tourist trap than Cornwall. Isle of Skye. Nads thinks Nicola is going to be strict about visiting Scotland. Nads does an impression of Nicola. M:"Nicola Sturgeon is the type of headmistress I really wouldn't want to be put outside her office." Tells us about being sent to the office for throwing a brick at someone in the schoolyard
Proceeds to show how the headmaster did nuggies on his head. Nads:"What a strange thing to do?' Mark:"It really hurt." (I think that's the point of nuggies)
Nads wants to go to the Isle of Wight, but Mark doesn't; it's all because it reminds him of his Nan. Mark:"Is Blackgang Chine still there?" Talks about getting different coloured sand in a sand thing. Nads: "I want to go to Dorset. Mark is very, very fussy. He doesn't like change and he always hates it when I try and book a holiday and when we get there 'Oh I'm really glad you've done." Mark says its not true. Nads talks about him being a workaholic. Mark says he is more of an explorer, outback places. Nads says she would love to go to an outback place. (what she means is probably Outback Steakhouse) Wales. Talk of camper van around the country, but Mark says that is a lot of driving for only 1 person. Nads says what are you talking about? You drive one day, stay another. (spoken like a true non-driver) Swanage chat. Norfolk, Mark says its a bit flat.
Hold on to your hats kids, cuz a fight's about to start. Mark:" I love flat, but you don't." Nads:"MAAARRK! YOU SAID NORFOLK IS TOO FLAT!" Mark loves flat because its... CINEMATIC. Nads says she loved Norfolk when she went, she wants to go back. Mark:"Why does you always want to throw wedges between us?" Nads:"Wedges?" "I'm trying to get them to tell you off." Mark:"I don't want to be told off on a Monday morning? I've got enough going on this week without you getting people to tell me off." DISS. "Don't diss me." (ha. ha. Dad joke) Scotland chat. Talk of a house swap with Kaye and Ian. (Kaye immediately makes herself unavailable for the forseeable.) "We would want to see them." says Mark. Nads: "yeah but if they want a holiday.." Mark suggests a wife swap with Frank Lampard. Mark suggests camping next to Crystal Palace Park. This is Nads
"Yeah, have some more fumes. We have been here all year breathing fumes." (yeah some emitting from your own orifices)
Mark asks about problems ordering Ventolin inhalers (I had that problem at the beginning of the pandemic) Nads:"We got to go soon, because I have Loose Women." SO GUYS LOTS OF ..Nads changes the course of Mark's chatter. Nads announcing the songs. Karen asks about content on the main channel, been quiet. After the Cornwall vlogs, they will up things in February, so lucky us.
HIT THE THUMBS UP GUYS! Nads sang to Sue Thorpe twice now. Chat about upcoming vlogs. They didn't want to film themselves just mooching around. (hasn't stopped you before) KEEP READY, KEEP FRESH
COOK ALONG TOMORROW NIGHT. LOTS OF LOVE GUYS, SUBSCRIBE. Nads: AND LOOSE WOMEN TODAY HALF PAST 12, ITV, SEE YOU THERE! (I can hear some of you now saying, "So I will be watching Steph's Packed Lunch then."
) HIT THE THUMBS UP IF YOU HAVEN'T, HIT THE SUBSCRIBE IF YOU HAVEN'T! SUBSCRIBE, SUBSCRIBE, SUBSCRIBE BYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEE. I need an Advil
now.