Sandra_1984
Well-known member
I hate the idea that "porn is normal"! No it isn't!!
It's exploitave of ALL women. It's an industry that despises women. It's desensitized so many people (men and women) to intimate relationships and sex.
I'm sorry, I don't believe for one second you're a doctor with "patients who've worked in that industry"...whether you're discussing "morales" (I'm guessing morals?) or not.
There's no way in hell a doctor of any kind could be ignorant to the deeper, underlying issues of that industry to just come out and say its all OK. What about the physical damage done to the women's bodies? The mental health damage? The way thousands of men and women have a warped sense of reality of sexual behaviours due to the porn industry.
I have friends who have been married, now divorced and have dipped back into the dating scene. Sometimes on their first sexual encounter with their new found lover, they are having their hair pulled by men or being choked by men who thing 'all women love this' in sex. Erm.....porn has educated them wrongly. Either that or they're being pounded like a jackhammer on steroids.
Porn is showing men having unprotected sex with women, putting their dicks into one women then another....or a vagina then an anus then back to the vagina, or even the mouth. The health risks that come with that have consequences, is that still "all grand"?
Porn is giving a false reality to impressionable young and old adults (breaks my heart, but even children). It's sterile, aggressive and degrading. I know women who work in porn and will say "oh I love working as an actress in this industry" to then turn around five-ten years later to confess she'd been bullied into that admission, or she was so drugged up she didn't realise how deeply embedded into something so grim she was. Or she will turn around and say how she now realises she was exploited. Porn stars who've once claimed to love the industry have contacted the press and the police years later to report incidents of work related rape, only to be laughed at. How the heck do you think that would make them feel? Belittled? Unbelieved. Worthless.
So people who claim the "women are consenting" so it's all good, really need to look at the bigger picture, because consent really isn't black and white. Of course I'd say yes to making a quick dollar for having sex on camera if I was so desperate, be it for food for my children or drugs if I was an addict, but that consent would come from desperation, not a desire or free choice. Needless to say, the majority of the poor women in this industry are reliant on drugs. Usually to get them through the physical and mental pain of performing. Again, something a doctor would consider "grand and normal"?
And of course, some men in the industry are exploited too.
And of course, some men and women in the industry do just do it for the thrills and it's nothing to do with the money (like me with the webcams). This will never be commercial pornography though, it'll likely be amateur porn, unpaid, self uploaded.
But for a "doctor" to say it's "all grand" has just bewildered me. For a female to ever say porn is okay also bewilders me. Have we been conditioned by the patriarchy that much that some of us believe this is normal and okay?
Our daughters are going to have sexual partners who's majority of education when it comes to sexual acts is learned from this male dominated, women hating industry. I don't want my daughter (or my sons) thinking its normal to stick a penis in a mouth so hard that the woman vomits and chokes. I don't want them normalising hitting and smacking and hair pulling in sex....as a norm. Fair enough if that is what people want to do, then all good, but their needs to be a discussion on their preferences, not just having this preconceived mindset that "this is how it's supposed to be because this is how they do it in porn".
Then there's the preconceived ideas that women should have loud multiple orgasms with every sexual encounter...then when it doesn't happen the woman feels she's not normal or the man feels he's inferior. Some people genuinely don't believe porn is acting (including acting orgasms). This is damaging to their sexual mental health.
There's the men with the 'grip of death' who become so desensitized to sex in general that they find it difficult to either gain an erection, hold a prolonged erection or climax during sex. If you were a doctor of any kind you'd understand this because in society it's becoming a larger problem than ever before. Research claiming it's due to regular porn consumption. But "it's all grand and natural" hey, that people are seeking medical intervention due to porn industry ruined sex lives. It's all OK men in their 20's are seeking out Viagra to assist them due to their desensitisation. It's OK that some men see the aggressive nature of porn and then believe it's natural so then become aggressive in their own sexual behaviours, resulting in women needing surgery to correct the damage done to them?
Sorry but it's not OK. No *commercial* porn is OK. Amateur, possibly, but you can not be certain, but you can never, ever purchase consent. Sex isn't a commodity.
And the idea that men wanking to porn is OK is absurd. I appreciate men are visual creatures, but honestly, do with give them that little credit that we believe they 'need' or 'deserve' porn?
God, if you made it to the end of this dissertation well done
just adding I'm no prude. I've fucked myself on webcams to multiple dildos without being exploited. I feel sick with myself now for doing that (years ago) and I made that decision based on my own free will, so I can only imagine what some of the previously exploited women who didn't consent/consented out of desperation must feel.
It's exploitave of ALL women. It's an industry that despises women. It's desensitized so many people (men and women) to intimate relationships and sex.
I'm sorry, I don't believe for one second you're a doctor with "patients who've worked in that industry"...whether you're discussing "morales" (I'm guessing morals?) or not.
There's no way in hell a doctor of any kind could be ignorant to the deeper, underlying issues of that industry to just come out and say its all OK. What about the physical damage done to the women's bodies? The mental health damage? The way thousands of men and women have a warped sense of reality of sexual behaviours due to the porn industry.
I have friends who have been married, now divorced and have dipped back into the dating scene. Sometimes on their first sexual encounter with their new found lover, they are having their hair pulled by men or being choked by men who thing 'all women love this' in sex. Erm.....porn has educated them wrongly. Either that or they're being pounded like a jackhammer on steroids.
Porn is showing men having unprotected sex with women, putting their dicks into one women then another....or a vagina then an anus then back to the vagina, or even the mouth. The health risks that come with that have consequences, is that still "all grand"?
Porn is giving a false reality to impressionable young and old adults (breaks my heart, but even children). It's sterile, aggressive and degrading. I know women who work in porn and will say "oh I love working as an actress in this industry" to then turn around five-ten years later to confess she'd been bullied into that admission, or she was so drugged up she didn't realise how deeply embedded into something so grim she was. Or she will turn around and say how she now realises she was exploited. Porn stars who've once claimed to love the industry have contacted the press and the police years later to report incidents of work related rape, only to be laughed at. How the heck do you think that would make them feel? Belittled? Unbelieved. Worthless.
So people who claim the "women are consenting" so it's all good, really need to look at the bigger picture, because consent really isn't black and white. Of course I'd say yes to making a quick dollar for having sex on camera if I was so desperate, be it for food for my children or drugs if I was an addict, but that consent would come from desperation, not a desire or free choice. Needless to say, the majority of the poor women in this industry are reliant on drugs. Usually to get them through the physical and mental pain of performing. Again, something a doctor would consider "grand and normal"?
And of course, some men in the industry are exploited too.
And of course, some men and women in the industry do just do it for the thrills and it's nothing to do with the money (like me with the webcams). This will never be commercial pornography though, it'll likely be amateur porn, unpaid, self uploaded.
But for a "doctor" to say it's "all grand" has just bewildered me. For a female to ever say porn is okay also bewilders me. Have we been conditioned by the patriarchy that much that some of us believe this is normal and okay?
Our daughters are going to have sexual partners who's majority of education when it comes to sexual acts is learned from this male dominated, women hating industry. I don't want my daughter (or my sons) thinking its normal to stick a penis in a mouth so hard that the woman vomits and chokes. I don't want them normalising hitting and smacking and hair pulling in sex....as a norm. Fair enough if that is what people want to do, then all good, but their needs to be a discussion on their preferences, not just having this preconceived mindset that "this is how it's supposed to be because this is how they do it in porn".
Then there's the preconceived ideas that women should have loud multiple orgasms with every sexual encounter...then when it doesn't happen the woman feels she's not normal or the man feels he's inferior. Some people genuinely don't believe porn is acting (including acting orgasms). This is damaging to their sexual mental health.
There's the men with the 'grip of death' who become so desensitized to sex in general that they find it difficult to either gain an erection, hold a prolonged erection or climax during sex. If you were a doctor of any kind you'd understand this because in society it's becoming a larger problem than ever before. Research claiming it's due to regular porn consumption. But "it's all grand and natural" hey, that people are seeking medical intervention due to porn industry ruined sex lives. It's all OK men in their 20's are seeking out Viagra to assist them due to their desensitisation. It's OK that some men see the aggressive nature of porn and then believe it's natural so then become aggressive in their own sexual behaviours, resulting in women needing surgery to correct the damage done to them?
Sorry but it's not OK. No *commercial* porn is OK. Amateur, possibly, but you can not be certain, but you can never, ever purchase consent. Sex isn't a commodity.
And the idea that men wanking to porn is OK is absurd. I appreciate men are visual creatures, but honestly, do with give them that little credit that we believe they 'need' or 'deserve' porn?
God, if you made it to the end of this dissertation well done
just adding I'm no prude. I've fucked myself on webcams to multiple dildos without being exploited. I feel sick with myself now for doing that (years ago) and I made that decision based on my own free will, so I can only imagine what some of the previously exploited women who didn't consent/consented out of desperation must feel.
) and has mentioned being one on literally every post mentioned. All by age 30 too... 
Really ridiculous behaviour. I have ignored her now.