If my life was a bad luck bingo I’d be calling “house” right now.
last week my husband was going to stay with his brotherfor a few days. This original plan wasfollowing an argument we had and preceded with “we need a break”. We had plans that weekend such as me signing off on a £6000 bathroom at B&Q. Therefore he postponed the trip to platinum jubilee weekend. He left his ring at home and didn’t say bye as I was asleep. I queried this with him and he claimed it was a mistake. I felt strange all day. The last message I got was he got into London safe and sound. I heard nothing else from him. On the Sunday something didn’t seem right. I checked his emails to see if it would explain his silence as he was logged in. I saw gig tickets and thought maybe he went with his brother. Called him and he said he was meeting him Sunday instead. Alarm bells start ringing. I then find a hotel booking for a double room one bed 2 adults. More alarm bells ringing. Basically he took a female coworker he had already started an affair with. I found a 4 page long love letter poorly hidden in his emails as well. It was the most transparent, ego boosting claptrap I’ve ever read. It was along the lines of “you deserve to be happy, you’re a lovely person [who breaks his wedding vows]” yeah lovely guy! Oh and she’s in a relationship. I sent it to my friends and my sister in law. Basically they had a kiss weeks ago but the trip obviously “cemented” the affair so to speak. I queried how much he spoke with this woman a couple ofweeks leading up to the trip and he said there was nothing going on. Well that was a lie. I reacted very badly as you can imagine as he is the only one I would trust my life with since my mum passed. I pretended to sell his things on Facebook because he refused to answer the phone. Eventually it was turned off. He didn’t see his brother until 9pm that night so I like to think he spent all day panicking on what to do as he was meant to meet him at midday. Husband refuses to talk to me until Wednesday when he comes back. He walks through the door and says he wants to break up. He’s a totally different person at this point, very cold and strange. He’s already had the benefit of talking to his brother and countless others while I’ve waited no idea what to expect. He said I emotionally abused him and wanted a life with him like my mum (aka shopping doing fun things living etc) and the whole argument was about how I was awful to him and he wasn’t happy. He admitted fault with the cheating but this seemed to pale in comparison to my faults. He didn’t like how I coped with my mothers death either. I don’t think abusers offer money for their partner to get private dentistry for their teeth, or £400 for their car insurance excess when theyre short on cash. I always had more money than him and it is so insulting to have all these claims passed around like everyone has a half baked story about me. One of the things he started with was how his family were upset about my facebook posts - um hello? I cannot believe how he has treated me considering we were together for 10 years and married for 4.If my mum was alive she would be livid with him. There’s way more but I’ve typed so much already. I don’t think he planned for me to find out. I know have a deadline to sell my mums house when he said I was in no rush. I think this other woman got into his head and he’s stupid enough to walk out on our family (no kids but I have a dog he loves), financial security and owning the house we’ve paid for 5 years out of 20. He flip flopped between being unhappy for years to last 2 years to months he didn’t sound convinced. The ironic thing was in the month of may we had the most sex we’ve had in ages so explain that (he said he was trying to enjoy it yeah ok!). I was upset as we got married in May so we had a meal and it’s ruined the memory he said “you’ve ruined your own memory”. The final twist of the knife was I had a negative pregnancy test when he booked the trip. It was a scare but basically he got the green light and went ahead with the plan. He said it made him realise he doesn’t want kids with me either. Basically all the typical signs a partner shows they’ve stopped loving you were not present at all. He totally set me up or is reacting badly because I caught him out and embarrassed him.
I’ll never forgive him for this but yeah what a crappy two years it has been.
last week my husband was going to stay with his brotherfor a few days. This original plan wasfollowing an argument we had and preceded with “we need a break”. We had plans that weekend such as me signing off on a £6000 bathroom at B&Q. Therefore he postponed the trip to platinum jubilee weekend. He left his ring at home and didn’t say bye as I was asleep. I queried this with him and he claimed it was a mistake. I felt strange all day. The last message I got was he got into London safe and sound. I heard nothing else from him. On the Sunday something didn’t seem right. I checked his emails to see if it would explain his silence as he was logged in. I saw gig tickets and thought maybe he went with his brother. Called him and he said he was meeting him Sunday instead. Alarm bells start ringing. I then find a hotel booking for a double room one bed 2 adults. More alarm bells ringing. Basically he took a female coworker he had already started an affair with. I found a 4 page long love letter poorly hidden in his emails as well. It was the most transparent, ego boosting claptrap I’ve ever read. It was along the lines of “you deserve to be happy, you’re a lovely person [who breaks his wedding vows]” yeah lovely guy! Oh and she’s in a relationship. I sent it to my friends and my sister in law. Basically they had a kiss weeks ago but the trip obviously “cemented” the affair so to speak. I queried how much he spoke with this woman a couple ofweeks leading up to the trip and he said there was nothing going on. Well that was a lie. I reacted very badly as you can imagine as he is the only one I would trust my life with since my mum passed. I pretended to sell his things on Facebook because he refused to answer the phone. Eventually it was turned off. He didn’t see his brother until 9pm that night so I like to think he spent all day panicking on what to do as he was meant to meet him at midday. Husband refuses to talk to me until Wednesday when he comes back. He walks through the door and says he wants to break up. He’s a totally different person at this point, very cold and strange. He’s already had the benefit of talking to his brother and countless others while I’ve waited no idea what to expect. He said I emotionally abused him and wanted a life with him like my mum (aka shopping doing fun things living etc) and the whole argument was about how I was awful to him and he wasn’t happy. He admitted fault with the cheating but this seemed to pale in comparison to my faults. He didn’t like how I coped with my mothers death either. I don’t think abusers offer money for their partner to get private dentistry for their teeth, or £400 for their car insurance excess when theyre short on cash. I always had more money than him and it is so insulting to have all these claims passed around like everyone has a half baked story about me. One of the things he started with was how his family were upset about my facebook posts - um hello? I cannot believe how he has treated me considering we were together for 10 years and married for 4.If my mum was alive she would be livid with him. There’s way more but I’ve typed so much already. I don’t think he planned for me to find out. I know have a deadline to sell my mums house when he said I was in no rush. I think this other woman got into his head and he’s stupid enough to walk out on our family (no kids but I have a dog he loves), financial security and owning the house we’ve paid for 5 years out of 20. He flip flopped between being unhappy for years to last 2 years to months he didn’t sound convinced. The ironic thing was in the month of may we had the most sex we’ve had in ages so explain that (he said he was trying to enjoy it yeah ok!). I was upset as we got married in May so we had a meal and it’s ruined the memory he said “you’ve ruined your own memory”. The final twist of the knife was I had a negative pregnancy test when he booked the trip. It was a scare but basically he got the green light and went ahead with the plan. He said it made him realise he doesn’t want kids with me either. Basically all the typical signs a partner shows they’ve stopped loving you were not present at all. He totally set me up or is reacting badly because I caught him out and embarrassed him.
I’ll never forgive him for this but yeah what a crappy two years it has been.
Last edited:
What they said.
