Mrs Hinch #599 She feels like a floof…….but she looks like a twit
Well done to @brainwashednomore for their top voted thread title! (I edited twit to twit as wasn't sure if it counted as swearing!) Please mark suggestions with "thread suggestion", keep them short and swear free.
As we are now just this thread away from 600, title suggestions in this thread need to be appropriate for our thread 600 topic. Thread 600 is to be dedicated to all the visual deceptions and lies we have exposed over the years. From face filters to Little Ronnie Red Gloves and beyond.
Apologies for the length on this one, she's been a busy bragger this past few days!
After the Biggest Bauble Brag of the millenium, Soph returned on Saturday morning with the two man tend farmer team and another acknowledgement of DEFRA's current rules around poultry. Seeing as she almost never acknowledges rules about anything, we can only assume that she has been seriously told off by them.
Weirdly, she chose to lie about how 3 chickens gave her 4 eggs. Now, the chicken people on the thread confirm that chickens don't lay more than once a day. What a weird lie to tell.
Ren and Len were forced to play on the conservatory floor again despite having a boof, playroom and dining table they could have played at. It's almost like that's the only room they can afford to heat....
Suddenly she's all about Henry again and treated the sheep to a dog penis reel. I'm joking but that was the first clip. It didn't do very well.
On she went to clean out and re-stock the PAN TR Y that's only been in use for a few weeks.
And what delicious foodstuffs does Sopha keep in the pantry? Well her shopping list must have read:
- enough packet sauce and seasoning mixes to last through an apocalypse
- so much haribo and fruitella that your teeth turn black just looking at it
- the entire selection of cupcake kits sold at Tesco (I looked, it's true!)
- miscellaneous dry biscuit and bread based "snacks"
- fun size chocs to make Jim jealous
- stock cubes, all.
She showed herself laying this all out neatly into its barshkits, (or in the case of the stock cubes pure anarchy when she threw them all into a jar mixed), with not a care for how the country is currently experiencing an economic crisis, forcing families to cut back drastically on essential spending.
Clean surfaces cleaned and plebs put in their place, Weepetto popped by to water the garden and Jimmy shared a bunch of date stamped photos because something's got to him.
On Sunday morning, she'd properly caught up with Tattle (not that she's read here since King Alfred burnt the cakes) so she had to post a story about the boys outdoor slippers - a hot Tattle topic.
She can double down on it as much as she likes but crocs or wellies are more appropriate and she knows it.
Apparently the OG Hinchliffes were round Sunday, so she savoured 10 minutes doing duck all but covering up the fag smoke smell.
Strangely she was then at Greyskull later on that afternoon/evening. Did she drag the Hinchliffes round there? Did she just duck off over to Mamfas on her own?
Mamfa has been forbidden to touch a single thing at the Grey Mausoleum, including the pissy stick heart.
On Monday, despite how busy she always is guysh, she had a bit of time to simper and cackle over a recycling bin being emptied. Simple things ey...
She whacked out another ad for Popsa. Contractual obligations etc etc
Dolphin Rose made some "fun food" by emptying a bag of icing sugar over some donuts to make "snowmen". Not the only snow in the house if you catch my drift.
She shoved a bunch of crap down the back of the sofa and then filmed herself cleaning it out.
Cringe content warning! Yes, Sloth and Janine took a drive and to alleviate the boredom of having to be within a few inches of each other, decided to do a very scripted car quiz. Soph got to show off her extensive knowledge of primary school times tables, where the world cup is going to be held and how not to wear a seatbelt.
They also butchered two languages and caused a cringe so large that it slowed down the earth's rotation by a whole microsecond.
As you can see, she's been so busy that she had to take most of Tuesday off for her thumbs to recover. Not for long though, as up she popped like a bad smell dressed as a sheep to shill to her sheep.
Still dragging out that Teshco content but no Christmas range yet?
Finally, before turning in at 6:30pm, she whacked a load of branches next to some tea lights and expensive ceramic decorations and called it Christmas (but not for children).
Sophie Dolphin Rose, our Lady of Maldon, filters her fingers.
¿Dónde están los cojones de Jamie?
Ils sont dan's le sac à main en soie rose de Freda.
(sorry if my translations are crap, it's been a while since I did either language!)
Well done to @brainwashednomore for their top voted thread title! (I edited twit to twit as wasn't sure if it counted as swearing!) Please mark suggestions with "thread suggestion", keep them short and swear free.
As we are now just this thread away from 600, title suggestions in this thread need to be appropriate for our thread 600 topic. Thread 600 is to be dedicated to all the visual deceptions and lies we have exposed over the years. From face filters to Little Ronnie Red Gloves and beyond.
Apologies for the length on this one, she's been a busy bragger this past few days!
After the Biggest Bauble Brag of the millenium, Soph returned on Saturday morning with the two man tend farmer team and another acknowledgement of DEFRA's current rules around poultry. Seeing as she almost never acknowledges rules about anything, we can only assume that she has been seriously told off by them.
Weirdly, she chose to lie about how 3 chickens gave her 4 eggs. Now, the chicken people on the thread confirm that chickens don't lay more than once a day. What a weird lie to tell.
Ren and Len were forced to play on the conservatory floor again despite having a boof, playroom and dining table they could have played at. It's almost like that's the only room they can afford to heat....
Suddenly she's all about Henry again and treated the sheep to a dog penis reel. I'm joking but that was the first clip. It didn't do very well.
On she went to clean out and re-stock the PAN TR Y that's only been in use for a few weeks.
And what delicious foodstuffs does Sopha keep in the pantry? Well her shopping list must have read:
- enough packet sauce and seasoning mixes to last through an apocalypse
- so much haribo and fruitella that your teeth turn black just looking at it
- the entire selection of cupcake kits sold at Tesco (I looked, it's true!)
- miscellaneous dry biscuit and bread based "snacks"
- fun size chocs to make Jim jealous
- stock cubes, all.
She showed herself laying this all out neatly into its barshkits, (or in the case of the stock cubes pure anarchy when she threw them all into a jar mixed), with not a care for how the country is currently experiencing an economic crisis, forcing families to cut back drastically on essential spending.
Clean surfaces cleaned and plebs put in their place, Weepetto popped by to water the garden and Jimmy shared a bunch of date stamped photos because something's got to him.
On Sunday morning, she'd properly caught up with Tattle (not that she's read here since King Alfred burnt the cakes) so she had to post a story about the boys outdoor slippers - a hot Tattle topic.
She can double down on it as much as she likes but crocs or wellies are more appropriate and she knows it.
Apparently the OG Hinchliffes were round Sunday, so she savoured 10 minutes doing duck all but covering up the fag smoke smell.
Strangely she was then at Greyskull later on that afternoon/evening. Did she drag the Hinchliffes round there? Did she just duck off over to Mamfas on her own?
Mamfa has been forbidden to touch a single thing at the Grey Mausoleum, including the pissy stick heart.
On Monday, despite how busy she always is guysh, she had a bit of time to simper and cackle over a recycling bin being emptied. Simple things ey...
She whacked out another ad for Popsa. Contractual obligations etc etc
Dolphin Rose made some "fun food" by emptying a bag of icing sugar over some donuts to make "snowmen". Not the only snow in the house if you catch my drift.
She shoved a bunch of crap down the back of the sofa and then filmed herself cleaning it out.
Cringe content warning! Yes, Sloth and Janine took a drive and to alleviate the boredom of having to be within a few inches of each other, decided to do a very scripted car quiz. Soph got to show off her extensive knowledge of primary school times tables, where the world cup is going to be held and how not to wear a seatbelt.
They also butchered two languages and caused a cringe so large that it slowed down the earth's rotation by a whole microsecond.
As you can see, she's been so busy that she had to take most of Tuesday off for her thumbs to recover. Not for long though, as up she popped like a bad smell dressed as a sheep to shill to her sheep.
Still dragging out that Teshco content but no Christmas range yet?
Finally, before turning in at 6:30pm, she whacked a load of branches next to some tea lights and expensive ceramic decorations and called it Christmas (but not for children).
Sophie Dolphin Rose, our Lady of Maldon, filters her fingers.
¿Dónde están los cojones de Jamie?
Ils sont dan's le sac à main en soie rose de Freda.
(sorry if my translations are crap, it's been a while since I did either language!)
