It isn’t that long ago I was in your position and lost my job due to covid. Months and months with hardly any help from the government because my partner has a job so they basically told me to live off him, struggled to pay our rent, put food on the table etc but let me tell you this, it does get better! I started a new job Monday
so keep the faith because I felt exactly like you did, I was so bloody down and depressed, I was in tears nearly everyday wondering what the hell I was going to do while I watched different accounts etc go into arrears. It was bloody difficult and honestly if it weren’t for my amazing partner and mum, I genuinely think I’d have given up, as pathetic as that might sound... also, watching her videos everyday made me feel so useless and awful about myself, i don’t even know why I kept watching. I felt like I was totally worthless, no income, full of anxiety, getting up everyday to lie on the sofa and feel sorry for myself while watching her Insta perfect life with her partner home all day, no actual real work but having a nice big bank balance with all these freebies coming in, perfect house always clean and tidy... I just felt really crap! It wasn’t jealousy but it really did feel very unfair because of the lies etc she tells... Anyway, sorry for the essay, but just know you’re not alone. If you need any help at all, please message me, even if you just need me to help you out with some food or anything at all, I’m more than happy to help. it’s tough times for everyone especially in the run up to Christmas... keep your head up and remember, tough times don’t last.xx