Most Embarrassing Thing That’s Happened To You?

[LadyLockdown]

When I was little my auntie used to tell me her belly button was so deep she could hide a loaf of bread in it.
One winter, the insurance man had come round to collect his monthly cheque for her premium. She let him in and asked him to wait and went to get her cheque book, at this point 7 year old me sidled into the room and in an effort to make conversation said, "Did you know my auntie can hide a whole loaf of bread in her belly button?" to which he replied, "No. I didn't".

My auntie overheard and screeched my name but it was too late. She said whenever she saw him after that time she always felt compelled to tell him her belly button wasn't actually that big...

 

[Trafalgar]

This may out me somewhat, but I broke my foot having sex

I was a teen (about 18) we used too much baby oil, I was on top and slid off. The shame of having to go to the hospital all shiny from the oil and explain what happened will live with me forever.

 

[petitspois]

That reminds me, apparently I toddled into the living room to show the insurance man what I’d produced in my potty.
What is it with all these insurance men visiting?

 

[Gym&Tonic]

When I was in Year 8 we went to Drayton Manor Park for the end of term school trip. It was a really hot day and really busy so there were queues for everything. I was wearing these jelly shoes for some stupid reason, and because it was hot my feet were sweaty. I went on a Ferris Wheel with my friends and as we were getting off my foot slipped inside my shoes and I fell and rolled down the steps leading to the ride in front of the massive queue to get on it. A woman came over and asked if I was alright and I was so mortified I just said yes and rushed off

 

[Itsallaboutmememe]

Once when my husband was away I sent a very detailed message to a friend of how much I was missing him.. you know best friend talk. Well I thought it was my best friend. I accidentally sent it to my parents in law! I was mortified! There were things in that message not for parents eyes

I was sexting my fella one night (he was at work-me at home)
it got really steamy,so I took a quick snap of my tits and sent it
a few seconds later I got a message back

my son-mum,why have you sent me a picture of your bangers?!

 

[bookworm1403]

My friend started a new job recently. She's a seriously gorgeous 6ft model with really long legs etc, I always tell her I'm only her friend because of all the free drinks men buy us when we go out anyways, she was at work and, to quote her, she was wearing her really old, reserved-only-for-period knickers under her uniform which is a skirt. As she walked back from the toilet a few of her colleagues started to stare and giggle, she didn't know why until about an hour later when someone pointed out that her knickers were hanging down her legs; one of the side seams of the knickers had broke and she was waving them around as she walked everytime I think of it I laugh

 

[Ghostpumpkin]

I was chatting to a guy online when I was 16, he claimed to be 25 (long story) we chatted for about a year, I thought he was the best thing ever, he lived up north and I am down south. We arranged to meet up in Spain of all places for the first time, it was my 17th birthday. I also didn’t tell my family this was the plan until about 2 days before. They were mortified as you can imagine but I was determined to meet this guy much to their disgust. We met up, all went ok, thought I had met my soulmate as you do. On my birthday night (also the night I first ever did the deed!) we went for a Chinese earlier in the evening and to a dodgy looking rooftop bar who gave me free shots as it was my birthday. My parents let me go to his room in the hotel, i convinced them I was falling asleep so wouldn’t be coming back to their room. (I’m sure they knew why) woke up in the middle of the night and was sick absolutely everywhere. Projectile vomited over the bed, him, didn’t know what to do at that age. I tried to clear up as much as I could I remember throwning the quilt out the window and it landed on a lower balcony luckily not a room I was so embarrassed. I went back to my room the next day and was so poorly for the rest of the holiday, he went home as planned the next day as it happened. We spoke for about 2 weeks after and never spoke again. To this day I don’t know if it was the Chinese, dodgy bar with dodgy shots or the sheer overwhelming feeling of what I’d been through in a few days, probably a mix of all! Also looking back he was a lot older than he said. I often wonder what happened to him, I don’t think he even gave me his real name.

 

[Christmasgrinch]

Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me is Mr christmasGrinch has a Prince Albert piercing! (This is important to the story)

after some fun Mr Christmas grinch says “my bar is missing” I said what do you mean your bar is missing?!
Searched high and low and couldn’t find it anywhere. Gave up the search, started to feel a bit woozy and weird.
Rang 111 and explained to the absolutely mortified woman who didn’t know what a Prince Albert was that I thought I had a piercing inside me .

manage to get a doctors appointment so off I trot.
In the most uncomfortable position ever, the nurse says nice big cough for me!! I cough, I hear a clunk and a piercing ball is rolling toward the nurse like some sort of twisted circus prize! The poor woman then had to literally dig inside me for the rest of the piercing as it has lodged itself inside me don’t think I’ll ever live that down

 

[Mulholland Drive]

Having to explain how lesbians have "sex" to the mother of an ex, ex ex g/f

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me is Mr christmasGrinch has a Prince Albert piercing! (This is important to the story)

after some fun Mr Christmas grinch says “my bar is missing” I said what do you mean your bar is missing?!
Searched high and low and couldn’t find it anywhere. Gave up the search, started to feel a bit woozy and weird.
Rang 111 and explained to the absolutely mortified woman who didn’t know what a Prince Albert was that I thought I had a piercing inside me .

manage to get a doctors appointment so off I trot.
In the most uncomfortable position ever, the nurse says nice big cough for me!! I cough, I hear a clunk and a piercing ball is rolling toward the nurse like some sort of twisted circus prize! The poor woman then had to literally dig inside me for the rest of the piercing as it has lodged itself inside me don’t think I’ll ever live that down

Oh Christ. That made me cross my legs the thought of someone having to rummage inside me for the piercing made me feel funny lol

 

[Itsallaboutmememe]

Oh God, loads.

The one that stays in my mind.... I bought a vibrator when I was 18, shaped like a lipstick. Mum found it when she was helping clear out my room so it could be re-painted. ‘Ah, is this the lipstick your dad got you for Christmas? It’s a lovely red, isn’t it?’ She tried swatching it and obviously it didn’t swatch... then found the button... held it out as it vibrated away... then asked LOUDLY IN FRONT OF THE PAINTER “Apple, why is it vibrating, tell me why, what is it?” literally over and over and over, I was mortified, the painter (old enough to be my father) was tittering away although tbf to him he also looked as though he could’ve melted through the floor, she then got the message. Still, “Apple has a d*ldo!” went around my whole family for a while. Sometimes I wonder if you can murder someone via vibrator because I came very close that day (pun not intended) at least nobody snoops around my room any more

many moons ago then the rabbit vibes where massive my mate bought me a huge purple one to say thanks for babysitting (I didn’t ask her to!)
anyway,I took it out of the box,nearly died at the sheer size and shoved it on top of the wardrobe
forgot all about it
about 6 weeks later,my dad came round to paint my hallway/landing and asked if I had the paint for him
forgetting all about the massive purple dildo i tried to reach for my tin of ‘mineral mist’ but couldn’t reach
my dad reached up (as he’s 6’) and must have knocked it,as it came flying off the top of the wardrobe,bounced off his head and landed on the floor!
he just LOOKED at it and said
‘what the duck is that?!’
I mean what the duck do you say to that?!
I just chucked one of the kids blankets over it,wrapped it up and fled!

years and years later my mates talked me into buying another one (I guess I never learn)
got kids to bed,all asleep,sat on my bed,unwrapped it and turned it on
was just getting to the good bit,when my bedroom door burst open and there was my son!
armed with a bottle of bug spray in one hand,newspaper in the other to kill the ’wasp’ he could hear in my room (he knows I’m highly allergic)
I managed to turn it off and convince him that the ‘wasp’ must have flown out of the window

i stuffed it in a drawer and the little sod took it to school with him a few weeks
later

we laugh about it now,8 years later (I laugh through gritted teeth tho)

 

[McNuggets]

My son puked in an indoor swimming pool years ago so obviously the whole pool had to be evacuated and emptied.

I wanted to die inside.

 

[Londoncailín]

My ex

 

[Jasminexx02]

Laughed so much reading through this thread, we need to revive it

 

[Damagedtime]

When I was 18 it was really windy and I stupidly decided to wear a dress. Me and the then boyfriend at the time decided to go shopping and I needed to get cash out from the ATM. It was up some stairs in the square where it was really busy and my dress blew up in front of everyone whilst I was drawing the cash. Useless twit of a boyfriend was oblivious and did nothing. I was so mortified

 

[HelloStereo]

Not the most embarrassing but this morning I was typing something in a rush first thing and accidentally sent my director a message with a kiss face emoji

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Not the most embarrassing but this morning I was typing something in a rush first thing and accidentally sent my director a message with a kiss face emoji

That’s fantastic. The only problem is if you get a photo back

 

[Web30]

I had a charity guy at my door the other week, told him I already had a dog and didn't want to another one. He said " I'm not selling you a dog, it's to sponsor one" I knew that, it's just my words didn't come out right