@annabananaw10 Thinking of you. It sounds like a break from trying would do you good, physically and mentally. I’ve either been pregnant, miscarrying or recovering since 4th July so I’ve decided to not try again until January. Lots of love 
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So pleased to hear you’re doing ok xxx
I hope everyone on this thread is ok, particularly this week with it being baby loss awareness week. Sending lots of virtual hugs x
I was doing OK until I received an email through on my phone. I signed up to weekly email updates from my local council just to stay in the know etc. Today's email flashed up, titled "baby loss awareness week". Well that was me gone.
I opened the email after a while and it had contact details for support etc. And then it went onto other completely unrelated topics from across the region.
I'm not usually one to get triggered at stuff but this really got to me. Why couldn't they have titled the email as something else and kept the baby loss awareness section in the body of the email? Im sure it was with good intentions and yes it does help to talk about it. But what didn't help was having "baby loss awareness" flash across my phone virtually shouting at me.Urgh..
I hope everyone is OK
I opened the email after a while and it had contact details for support etc. And then it went onto other completely unrelated topics from across the region.
I'm not usually one to get triggered at stuff but this really got to me. Why couldn't they have titled the email as something else and kept the baby loss awareness section in the body of the email? Im sure it was with good intentions and yes it does help to talk about it. But what didn't help was having "baby loss awareness" flash across my phone virtually shouting at me.Urgh..
I hope everyone is OK
Aww I can imagine how hard that was. It’s baby loss awareness day today, and people are lighting a candle at 7pm in memory for all the little ones who sadly didn’t know this world. It’s such a tough one because yes they need to create awareness but also it’s quite insensitive to those who’ve gone through it. I hope you’re ok x
I'm finding the baby awareness stuff today pretty though. I only miscarried 2 weeks ago. Was at the hospital to get my hcg checked last week and they offered me a candle but I said no. I feel like people would think I was making a big deal over nothing because the baby never grew beyond 5 weeks but I didn't know until 9 two feel like I can barely say I was pregnant x
Hi, I’m sorry for your loss and that you’re finding this week hard.
You absolutely were pregnant and you became a mum the minute you found out you were pregnant. Your loss and how you feel about it is absolutely valid, it doesn’t matter how far into your pregnancy you were, you lost a baby and that doesn’t change because you were x number of weeks.
You don’t have to engage in events this week, you may choose to do something at another stage or you may wish to do nothing. There’s no right or wrong with baby loss, you have to do what you want and what feels right to you at the time, and that can and probably will change over time.
This will stay with you forever and it’s important you allow yourself to grieve.
Sending love
I miscarried at 12 weeks but baby was only about 6 weeks developed. I am religious and buried the baby. The vicar said something very moving that was about the potential and the dreams we put into the pregnancy and that it was a life in gods eyes. I know religion isn't to everyone's taste but it made me make peace with my feelings that I had lost something significant but to the 'outside world' I 'wasn't really' pregnant.
Yesterday was tough me for too not just being baby loss awareness but it would’ve been 13 weeks for me so I would be telling people I was pregnant this weekend.
I just ate a Magnum and had a cry in the shower and went to bed. If the loss wasn’t so recent I think I would’ve actually appreciated seeing so many women share their stories to end the stigma around pregnancy loss but I really struggle especially since lately I just feel so angry that we can’t even grieve openly like we do with other deaths of people we loved. I’ve had to just keep acting like everything was okay and I hate that I can’t just say I lost my baby and I’m not okay.
I just ate a Magnum and had a cry in the shower and went to bed. If the loss wasn’t so recent I think I would’ve actually appreciated seeing so many women share their stories to end the stigma around pregnancy loss but I really struggle especially since lately I just feel so angry that we can’t even grieve openly like we do with other deaths of people we loved. I’ve had to just keep acting like everything was okay and I hate that I can’t just say I lost my baby and I’m not okay.
Hi all, can’t believe I’m back with more bad news…went for a check up on Friday after my medical miscarriage. Turns out I didn’t pass the sac/fetus after all. 
Was horrible, seeing my baby on the scan again, but no growth since 8 weeks….Cruelly, Monday should be our 12 scan but looks like I’ll be getting an MVA instead. I’ve tried the medical management route again, but tablets were inserted 23 hours ago and nothing has happened so I don’t think it has worked again. I’m worried about the long term risks of MVA…1 in 10,000 have serious complications that could impact fertility; perforated womb or cervix. 1 in 200 get scarring that can make pregnancy difficult. I know those are small, but there was only a 2% chance I’d have two miscarriages in a row and that happened. Thank you for giving me this space to vent, I’m just not sure what to do for the best.
Was horrible, seeing my baby on the scan again, but no growth since 8 weeks….Cruelly, Monday should be our 12 scan but looks like I’ll be getting an MVA instead. I’ve tried the medical management route again, but tablets were inserted 23 hours ago and nothing has happened so I don’t think it has worked again. I’m worried about the long term risks of MVA…1 in 10,000 have serious complications that could impact fertility; perforated womb or cervix. 1 in 200 get scarring that can make pregnancy difficult. I know those are small, but there was only a 2% chance I’d have two miscarriages in a row and that happened. Thank you for giving me this space to vent, I’m just not sure what to do for the best. I've had 2 MVAs this year and fell pregnant 2 months after the first one. I know its scary but the docs are amazing and it is very very unlikely anything bad would happen. The good thing is they can clear it all out properly and your body will be ready sooner hopefully for when you feel ready to try again. Please message if you want to know anymore about it xxHi all, can’t believe I’m back with more bad news…went for a check up on Friday after my medical miscarriage. Turns out I didn’t pass the sac/fetus after all.
Hope everyone here is doing ok, I’ve been avoiding the thread a bit because all the baby loss awareness stuff has been really overwhelming for me on social media and I just need a bit of a break from thinking about it. I did light a candle last night though
Your story really struck a cord with me. I went through two miscarriages last year and needed surgery both times. Like you, I was nervous of long term consequences especially as we’d been trying to conceive for a long time.Hi all, can’t believe I’m back with more bad news…went for a check up on Friday after my medical miscarriage. Turns out I didn’t pass the sac/fetus after all.
Despite all the problems and heartache, we persevered and I’m now a besotted mummy to my 10 week old boy and he has healed a lot of emotional scars. Please be brave and trust in the process xxx
My husband is so down. He thinks it's all his fault. He's tried to be positive about things, but this afternoon he broke down. I honestly feel awful. I genuinely feel like it's all my fault when in reality it's probably neither of us. It's all so difficult to navigate. I'm been very down about ttc since June and it's not getting any easier.
Have you thought about getting him to speak to a therapist? Might help xx
I don’t know if I’m being dramatic but I’ve had such a horrible morning.
I have a cracked tooth and an infection in my gum so 111 booked me in for an emergency dentist appointment this morning. On the form it obviously asked ‘are you or could you be pregnant?’ so I ticked yes as my viability scan is this afternoon but it’s looking like it’s going to be terrible news as my morning sickness has stopped and I have been having terrible cramps. I had a scan last week and they suspect it’s a miscarriage but wanted me to wait a week and have a follow up scan today.
Anyways, I get into the dentist and the nurse reads the form out loud and says oh you’re pregnant huge congratulations and both her and the dentist start clapping… I was so taken aback and started to cry and tried to explain that it wasn’t necessarily a happy time. The door was wide open so everyone in the corridor outside was staring at me and I just couldn’t stop the tears. The dentist looked at my tooth and said you’re going to need antibiotics but I can’t give you any if you might be pregnant … and continued to say this over and over again. I tried to explain my current situation but could feel everyone’s eyes outside the room just burning into me. She then kept googling and just kept saying awww that’s not going to work because you’re having a baby. She then said I need an extraction but they’ll only do that once I’m sure the babies dead … at this point I was just sobbing.
She then ushered me out the door and they charged me the £23 because I wasn’t sure if I was definitely pregnant so the receptionist said it’s best not to do the exemption. Surely there’s got to be a better way for things like this to be handled?
Im so annoyed at myself for getting so upset and so embarrassed about the whole thing. Sorry for ranting.
I have a cracked tooth and an infection in my gum so 111 booked me in for an emergency dentist appointment this morning. On the form it obviously asked ‘are you or could you be pregnant?’ so I ticked yes as my viability scan is this afternoon but it’s looking like it’s going to be terrible news as my morning sickness has stopped and I have been having terrible cramps. I had a scan last week and they suspect it’s a miscarriage but wanted me to wait a week and have a follow up scan today.
Anyways, I get into the dentist and the nurse reads the form out loud and says oh you’re pregnant huge congratulations and both her and the dentist start clapping… I was so taken aback and started to cry and tried to explain that it wasn’t necessarily a happy time. The door was wide open so everyone in the corridor outside was staring at me and I just couldn’t stop the tears. The dentist looked at my tooth and said you’re going to need antibiotics but I can’t give you any if you might be pregnant … and continued to say this over and over again. I tried to explain my current situation but could feel everyone’s eyes outside the room just burning into me. She then kept googling and just kept saying awww that’s not going to work because you’re having a baby. She then said I need an extraction but they’ll only do that once I’m sure the babies dead … at this point I was just sobbing.
She then ushered me out the door and they charged me the £23 because I wasn’t sure if I was definitely pregnant so the receptionist said it’s best not to do the exemption. Surely there’s got to be a better way for things like this to be handled?
Im so annoyed at myself for getting so upset and so embarrassed about the whole thing. Sorry for ranting.
Oh my goodness, this sounds absolutely awful, I’m so sorry you’ve went through this
it amazes me how some healthcare professionals can be so tone deaf! I had an interaction with a GP receptionist (who knew I literally just had a MC) and she kept harping on about patients and their positive pregnancy tests and I thought “ok I get it!” But this was nothing compared to what it sounds like you went through. Sorry I can’t help but you’ve every right to be upset and I hope you feel better soon. Please don’t be embarrassed or annoyed at yourself.So sorry! You’re not being over dramatic. That’s completely unprofessional and insensitive of them. I’d being putting in a formal complaint (obviously once you’ve processed what you’re going through) x
You still get an exemption even if you’ve sadly miscarried. I did, they don’t revoke it.
Sorry to hear you went through that but I'm also surprised they said you couldn't have antibiotics? I had an abscess in my first pregnancy when I was 5 months pregnant and was given antibiotics and then had the extraction once the infection had gone?