Messy home

[Spidey2020]

My house is always a mess. Not like filthy and dirty but untidy and cluttered. It doesn’t feel very homely either.
Has anybody been like this and changed? Please tell me how?

I dread anybody coming to my house, my children don’t have people over.
I need to ruthlessly declutter I think but no idea where to start whenever I do I just seem to create new piles somewhere else.

 

[Rosie glow]

We moved in to a smaller place with the same amount of stuff, we lived with it for a year or so but it got to the point it was getting us down it felt very cluttered and messy and untidy something had to change.
As this is not a forever home we decided to rent a little storage unit and store all the things we couldn't part with. We were ruthless with everything else left and sold/donated things we didn't need could live without.
As we don't have a lot of display shelves I regularly change nick naks over and store in a box under the stairs until I change round again same with pictures.

 

[Codiaeum]

My house is always a mess. Not like filthy and dirty but untidy and cluttered. It doesn’t feel very homely either.
Has anybody been like this and changed? Please tell me how?

I dread anybody coming to my house, my children don’t have people over.
I need to ruthlessly declutter I think but no idea where to start whenever I do I just seem to create new piles somewhere else.

I think you took a very important first step in recognizing that you don't like the current state of things, that's a hard thing to admit!

You could try to determine first whether you are dealing with a lack of storage for your things or whether there's generally a problem of not throwing away stuff you and your family truly no longer need. Lack of closed storage can make a home feel more cluttered than it really is, because everything is always visible.
And from there, I think the best option is to just start somewhere, and with a set goal. E.g. start with the kitchen and your goal might be to throw away/donate unused items from your cupboards, sort out ratty dishrags and check for any expired food items. That, at least for me, would make me more motivated than aiming to declutter the entire house in one go, because it's way too much.

There are also many Youtube videos on decluttering and also deep cleaning - I like Aurikatariina. Her focus is on truly filthy homes with years of neglect, they always motivate me to clean. Maybe you can find something you like that gets you in the mood.

Good luck! I'm sure you can get your home in a way you enjoy and your kids will also appreciate it (while making messes of course,e they're kids...)

 

[Spidey2020]

Thank you both. I have slightly awkward situation with somebody else’s stuff being here too.
Physical storage is a bit of an issue as is just having way more stuff than we need.

I actually managed to do all my laundry and not have it sit in various piles of done-ness and none of us have space for everything and truth be told particularly my children have way too much. My perpetual struggle to be organised can mask this and I end up buying more.
I’m going to look into storage. I also think my kitchen is a good place to start as less emotional baggage there.
Thanks for your kind words

 

[Snippysnips]

My folks are away this week on holiday so I'll be getting in about the house this week, am in the same position, it's not dirty as it's cleaned daily but it is getting cluttered an messy because of that

So I'll be doing one room at a time, it doesn't feel as bad when it's only one room getting concentrated on per day, I can be a bit more ruthless than my folks though with throwing things out so it's why it's being left with me, otherwise my dad would have crap kept that's never used or is broken etc

I think the best way to view it is just do one room at a time, really really think about if you need whatever an when the last time it was used was, it can be hard throwing stuff out because you always feel like maybe there will be a time it will come in useful or maybe you will get round to using it, but the way I see it is, if it's been sitting more than 6 months an hasn't been touched then chances are it never will be so it might as well go

 

[Clickbait]

Thank you both. I have slightly awkward situation with somebody else’s stuff being here too.
Physical storage is a bit of an issue as is just having way more stuff than we need.

I actually managed to do all my laundry and not have it sit in various piles of done-ness and none of us have space for everything and truth be told particularly my children have way too much. My perpetual struggle to be organised can mask this and I end up buying more.
I’m going to look into storage. I also think my kitchen is a good place to start as less emotional baggage there.
Thanks for your kind words

Word of caution about hiring a storage unit - make it a time limited option to help you sort out what you want to keep and get rid of. Don’t let it drag on for months as it ends up being very expensive in the long run. Most people I know who have hired one ending up getting rid of most the stuff in them after months (and sometimes years) of spending to store it.

 

[rainbowlemon]

Marie Kondo helped me. Kept things that either sparked joy or if I needed it even if it didn't spark joy. She also had a series on Netflix that might still be there.

You don't have to do it all in one go though. It's okay to do it in bits and to go at your pace.





I also started talking photos of things I found hard to let go of with sentimental items.

 

[Kim Mild]

Do you live with a partner? Unless they are on board with the decluttering and maintaining a decent standard you are wasting your time.

You are always going to be your own worst critic so other people won't judge as much as you think .

As long as your toilet is clean.

 

[gummy-bear]

I am the extreme opposite, I have no emotional attachment to anything so end up binning a lot which annoys my husband.
my best advice is to do it room by room, kitchen and bathroom is a good place to start as I feel like majority of stuff there is quite ‘neutral’. I make three piles- 1. Used regularly, keep 2. Charity shop 3. Bin / tip. You’ll be surprised how much stuff you have but rarely use and don’t need! I find it really liberating doing a room by room sort every few months to keep on top of tit you just gather unnecessarily. Good luck!

 

[Hinchhater1442]

Have you watched ‘sort your life out’ on BBC iPlayer? I’m not a Stacey Solomon fan but I watched it and it made me want to do a massive clear out. Might help as I know motivation can be the hard part initially. I love a declutter so aside from that I can’t be too helpful, except to say if you haven’t used it in the last 6-12 months then honestly you don’t need it

 

[dressagediva]

There are people you can hire who will come round and spend a whole day decluttering, with you on hand to say yes/no to stuff.
I see this advertised in a local FB group so it's obviously quite a useful thing for people.
Might be easier than trying to tackle it alone as they'll be professional and will have seen far worse and know how to go at it.

 

[coconochanel]

I think I would see what I wanted to keep before hiring a storage unit. Like others have said do one room at a time if that is overwhelming start in a drawer/cupboard and go from there. I always do the ' do I need it? will I use it? technique to help me decide whether to keep something or not.

 

[JoeBloggs]

Start small, a draw, a cupboard, papers.

I personally love a declutter, however one thing I do is have a basket for things that don't have a home in that room. I tend to use my washing basket. Then when I am done, I go around the house and return them to their room/location where they do belong.

Have a few boxes - Get rid/donate/sell and a 'I don't know'. This is ideal if you have stuff you are not ready to part with, put them in the box and give yourself 3/6/12 months. If you did not need/want it in that time it's ready for the other boxes. Anything you want to keep, put it in its home.

I read an article about if something costs less than £20, just get rid and you can always rebuy. I do think this is a little wasteful however can be used for something.

I also have other boxes around my house so I can deal with things on mass/at a later date. So I have a box hidden in my lounge for paperwork, then every 6 months or so I sort it.

 

[Zulkraa]

My house is always a mess. Not like filthy and dirty but untidy and cluttered. It doesn’t feel very homely either.
Has anybody been like this and changed? Please tell me how?

I dread anybody coming to my house, my children don’t have people over.
I need to ruthlessly declutter I think but no idea where to start whenever I do I just seem to create new piles somewhere else.

Some great advice and tips here already


Have you looked at or heard of The organised mum method or TOMM for short?

The Organised Mum

www.theorganisedmum.blog

This is the website and there is also a group on Facebook. I like her approach (you don’t have to be a parent to do this either) she suggests doing things throughout the week and having the weekends free.