Many years ago, I was seeing a guy for a few months. I loved him, admired him so much, he was the first guy I could talk to for hours on end about anything at all, he was so handsome too. Then after a few mths he told me he no longer wanted to see me as part of a relationship and I was fcking heartbroken and started crying. He said he was happy to still be friends but tbh I took it so badly with my heartbreak that it wasn't gonna happen. I cried every night for a year at least afterwards and was so bloody lonely, no other guy I knew socially came close to him. I thought I was an unworthy piece of crap too which I now realise was ludicrous. I was really sad for at least 2 years and then I met someone new who i moved on with and am still with, and I eventually got over my first love.
However strangely I still have dreams about him occasionally (mostly seeing him in a train station or something and he walks away before I have the chance to speak to him) and google his name (I never find anything but it's somehow addictive). About 2 years ago I started to get very upset by the memories of it again (not sure why) and I felt bad for a couple of weeks then got over it. I think there is still a bit of me scarred from losing someone I saw as both a friend and lover. He pops into my mind maybe a couple of times a week now. I still think, if we met again, what would he think of me now? I've changed hugely in personality and looks since then and I wonder if he has. I don't have sexual feelings for him anymore, it's more curiosity.
Has anyone else experienced heartbreak or had experiences like this?
However strangely I still have dreams about him occasionally (mostly seeing him in a train station or something and he walks away before I have the chance to speak to him) and google his name (I never find anything but it's somehow addictive). About 2 years ago I started to get very upset by the memories of it again (not sure why) and I felt bad for a couple of weeks then got over it. I think there is still a bit of me scarred from losing someone I saw as both a friend and lover. He pops into my mind maybe a couple of times a week now. I still think, if we met again, what would he think of me now? I've changed hugely in personality and looks since then and I wonder if he has. I don't have sexual feelings for him anymore, it's more curiosity.
Has anyone else experienced heartbreak or had experiences like this?