NEW FLOG "I'M NOT REALLY BUYING ANOTHER HOUSE!"
Admissions:
- She is not
really friends with Frow (she admits she didn't want to drag Vic away from her friends while she was at the wedding). Also, there will be no videos, vlogs or photos with the bride. So stop asking!
- She reads T.L. and must respond to all haters - she slips in an Ace Ventura reference and emphasizes the two pet detective sessions were paid for. With her own money!? So stop asking!
- Admits the neighbours shot her cat. She is now in mourning. Sad face. Implies the murderer is still loose in the village and she knows where you live because it is where the cat scent stops! Not naming any names... but you know who you are!
- She is a silly tit that loses a lot. She left behind her makeup bag during her travels (surprised she didn't claim it was stolen or that Ali lost it), along with all of her favourite #presspresents. So please send new supplies.
- She is changing the ugly dining room. That's right the rug, light fitting, chairs and curtains must go! Bet you didn't see that coming! Still no mention of the piano.
- Maintains she is misunderstood, as a means of justification for
constantly changing her house to match her current mood. Claims redecorating her house is good for her soul. Bless, so soulful!
- She isn't
actually buying a new house. But dreams of having several more.. one day...
- There are lots of people who watch her videos who aren't subscribed... so please subscribe. Don't make her beg!
Brags:
- Her pants are too big because she has lost weight. These are the plastic pants that have been worn non-stop for the last few weeks (I think she is unfamiliar with the concept of fabrics stretching when they are worn).
- The bedrooms in the house are in fact not rooms but
suites because they ALL have ensuites! That means from now on we must refer to them as the
guest suites and the
master suite for the main. Only poor people have bedrooms. Silly sausages.
- Her boot storage area will be bespoke (i.e not something poor people pick up from Ikea).
- She is getting rid of her Ikea curtains and replacing them with bespoke curtains. Only poor people have curtains that aren't bespoke.
- More bragging about needing a smaller size in freebie clothes.
- Even more bragging about needing a smaller size in freebie clothes.
Scrunchy-gate:
Is that the appearance of a new scrunchie? But it's not affiliate lynxed, so it must not be worth 90 pounds.
EDIT: Sorry, I'm always late to the party because I am in the southern hemisphere... and T.L. is a great distraction during maternity leave!