FourSeasonSoupObsessive
VIP Member
A journalist of my acquaintance is absolutely beside herself with how damaging the narrative around Arday’s suicide is, and I have to agree.
The key points when talking publicly about suicide are that you never glamourise it, you never suggest that it’s a realistic solution to someone’s problems, you avoid dramatic headlines (like “lynching” and “being hounded to death”), you always make it clear that people contemplating suicide should seek help and that help is available and, well, helpful. And most of all, most of fucking all, you never presume that you know what caused someone to take their own life, and you never suggest that there was a single trigger.
I am very sensitive to how we talk about suicide, as I have lost someone to it. The way it’s being talked about now in this case absolutely sickens me, and the more so because it’s by people who genuinely think they are empathetic, progressive, on the right side etc etc.
When you say things like “this black academic was lynched by racists who hated his success”, what message are you sending? You’re telling young black people that they are unwelcome in academia, and that if they are successful, they’ll be hated so much they’ll end up being hounded out and taking their own lives. Vulnerable people are seeing this right now and thinking “well, he’s escaped his critics, hasn’t he?”, and what are they doing with that information??
But because I called him out for being a fabulist, I’m the racist and his suicide can be laid at my door? No.
Guidelines here: https://media.samaritans.org/documents/Media_Guidelines_2026_DIGITAL.pdf
And hugs here for anyone who is struggling with this foul narrative 🫂 You matter, the people you lost to suicide mattered and all of this two dimensional sanctimony online is not how normal, compassionate people in the real world behave.
The key points when talking publicly about suicide are that you never glamourise it, you never suggest that it’s a realistic solution to someone’s problems, you avoid dramatic headlines (like “lynching” and “being hounded to death”), you always make it clear that people contemplating suicide should seek help and that help is available and, well, helpful. And most of all, most of fucking all, you never presume that you know what caused someone to take their own life, and you never suggest that there was a single trigger.
I am very sensitive to how we talk about suicide, as I have lost someone to it. The way it’s being talked about now in this case absolutely sickens me, and the more so because it’s by people who genuinely think they are empathetic, progressive, on the right side etc etc.
When you say things like “this black academic was lynched by racists who hated his success”, what message are you sending? You’re telling young black people that they are unwelcome in academia, and that if they are successful, they’ll be hated so much they’ll end up being hounded out and taking their own lives. Vulnerable people are seeing this right now and thinking “well, he’s escaped his critics, hasn’t he?”, and what are they doing with that information??
But because I called him out for being a fabulist, I’m the racist and his suicide can be laid at my door? No.
Guidelines here: https://media.samaritans.org/documents/Media_Guidelines_2026_DIGITAL.pdf
And hugs here for anyone who is struggling with this foul narrative 🫂 You matter, the people you lost to suicide mattered and all of this two dimensional sanctimony online is not how normal, compassionate people in the real world behave.