Jack Monroe #72 It’s not a government briefing, you don’t need to announce locking down

[Formal Chicken]

Deleted Grenfell post, complete with photo of her in a firefighter's uniform — first shared by Yel back in thread 14: https://web.archive.org/web/2017071...om/2017/06/16/we-need-to-talk-about-grenfell/

This actually makes me sick, what a douchebag. It’s one thing pretending to be a fireman but another to place yourself as someone important in the investigation.

 

[Saint_clemmie]

She's tweeted baby pics of SB (ovaries are playing an orchestra for another one apparently ). As a reply to a tweet, she's said something like 'yeah it's great when they're a baby but not so great when they're stuffing smeggy underwear down the bed'.

Thanks. She’s such a hypocrite

 

[Pocahontas]

Bwahahahahahaha. R Jack has just announced that she has “really sensitive tastebuds”.

So that explains why she never tastes her food!

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Sharing baby pics is she? Are they the ones where baby is all red cheeked and freezing in his too-small clothes that she put him in rather than ask his family for help? Or were they only saved for the 'scathing essays'?

 

[crystaleyesd]

Now she's talking about alternatives to dairy milk. Could this be it fraus? COULD WE FINALLY GET THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION OF THE AGES???

Can you, in fact, milk a pistachio?

 

[Uberrima fides]

Thread suggestion:-

#73 You Have To Speculate To Accumulate - Four Sideboards

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Honestly feel like I'm about to cry. Why the duck would you do that? It's so, so embarrassing for him. She must know, surely she must, that she is absolutely crossing the line.

honestly same. I know this is horrible and I’m sorry God and in a way sorry Jack for saying it, but the idea of her with a baby really upsets me, especially after what she did to that poor kitten. Babies need you to help them at all times, be a present and patient carer who is responsive to their needs.... They’re obvs all gorge but they don’t just exist as social media props, as additions to your personal brand. They’re their own little person (as is SB which is why his dirty laundry, literally, shouldn’t be aired on Twitter)

 

[kachoochoo]

well, that is a gorgeous picture of her and the baby SB (who isn't that small anymore) and she did say earlier she was digging out pictures, but I can't help but think why? why now? oh yeah, you want to make a good impression on new followers. and the "my ovaries are an orchestra" is . anyway, it doesn't matter cos now she's moved on to non-dairy milk!

 

[Saint_clemmie]

Thanks. She’s such a hypocrite

Quoted myself (very JM of me) to add...

Wtf is she on? “Cabal of trolls are stealing photos of my son, oh by the way here’s some more photos of my son, oh and let me tell you about his underwear while I’m here.”

twit!

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Quoted myself (very JM of me) to add...

Wtf is she on? “Cabal of trolls are stealing photos of my son, oh by the way here’s some more photos of my son, oh and let me tell you about his underwear while I’m here.”

twit!

Beggars belief that the loyal followers don't call her out on it. She truly must think she's created a closed and safe space there in that +280k circle

 

[Switchstreetz]

JM is the postergirl for precision. This is why all the information she broadcasts about herself leaves no room for ambiguity, criticism for sincerity or confusion over timelines. I’m afraid @DinosaurSenior that if you’re going to take this sloppy approach to hard-hitting facts you shouldn't really be following JM’s howling kombucha of truths.

"jack monroe's howling kombucha of truths" thread title and also a memoir (from the fraus) title right there

Now she's talking about alternatives to dairy milk. Could this be it fraus? COULD WE FINALLY GET THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION OF THE AGES???
?

im such an idiot...my first thought was "galaxy?"

 

[crystaleyesd]

honestly same. I know this is horrible and I’m sorry God and in a way sorry Jack for saying it, but the idea of her with a baby really upsets me, especially after what she did to that poor kitten. Babies need you to help them at all times, be a present and patient carer who is responsive to their needs.... They’re obvs all gorge but they don’t just exist as social media props, as additions to your personal brand. They’re their own little person (as is SB which is why his dirty laundry, literally, shouldn’t be aired on Twitter)

It genuinely chills me, and I speak as someone who is utterly unmoved by babies and has no children of her own. The way she's speaking about having another is exactly like the kitten - everything is revolving around her and what *she* wants, which is apparently a cute thing that is reliant on her (so they can't leave) and will make a good photo prop. She's psychotic.

 

[FlowerOfTheEast]

honestly same. I know this is horrible and I’m sorry God and in a way sorry Jack for saying it, but the idea of her with a baby really upsets me, especially after what she did to that poor kitten. Babies need you to help them at all times, be a present and patient carer who is responsive to their needs.... They’re obvs all gorge but they don’t just exist as social media props, as additions to your personal brand. They’re their own little person (as is SB which is why his dirty laundry, literally, shouldn’t be aired on Twitter)

I really, really don't think she'll have a baby. She's just chatting shite while posting old photos of SB. She did say she's 95% sure he'll be her only one. Don't worry, dear heart.

 

[Quincy M.E (retired)]

Evening Cabal. I've got some serious grunkering to do but needed to share: I briefed my mum on all things JM this morning and two hours later (TWO hours of our lives we will not get back) I'd got as far as the lovely Marcus Rashford, but Ma Quincy was losing the will to live and quite frankly losing respect for me I think. We had a time out and both decided to call it a day on that topic. I made dinner as an apology and we have been playing board games all eve and re building our relationship. I'm a terrible daughter / LA based M.E., fancy putting Ma Quincy through that. I'll stick to this coven as I can't shake my utter fascination of such a huge attention seeker. Time to see what I've missed - am quite excited.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

I feel like the thread no.73 should have a nod to that awesome Saturday morning show.... sandwich quiz was my favourite

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

Is she seriously tweeting to her quarter of a million followers about her 10 year old son's dirty underwear? Jesus Christ this is a new low.

OMG no. There’s certain things you don’t share let alone to a bunch of strangers. She could have all kinds following her.

 

[Quincy M.E (retired)]

I think her usage of 'hoofed' is quite apt since she permanently has her foot in her mouth.

Friends, it is time to give you my review for the final two episodes of DKL. The first thing I noticed in episode nine (putting on my fashion maven hat) is how dreadful and unflattering that denim shirt with puffball sleeves and sparkly embroidery is. At around five minutes in, when they cut to one of the guests on the screen, you can hear Jack stage-whispering 'I don't have my cards'. A consummate professional at work. To put to bed the whole question of chain restaurants, when Jack is talking about how long you could cook her dal recipe for, she herself says 'there is a chain of restaurants in London - Dishoom - that do theirs for twenty four hours'. During a question segment, Jack is asked why beef mince can have different percentages of fat. She helpfully responds 'well it just does, doesn't it?’ I give this episode five gabbled adjectives for dal out of five.

Most of episode ten is completely uneventful. I find myself getting distracted, contemplating whether Jack's heavy breathing and nasal voice quality have anything to do with her adenoids. Perhaps she should add that to her list of ailments. Matt dares to compare Jack to THAT MAN while she is shaking up a salad dressing in a jar. She is quick to tell us that many chefs have used this technique, lest we think that she has any respect for Jamie Oliver in particular. At about thirty minutes in we get a shot of one of her cards, on which she has scrawled the words 'today Matt I'm making a lentil bean + kale salad'. In my weird little maverick brain it makes me think of someone appearing on Stars in Their Eyes in a kale salad ensemble. Add that to the list of potential court outfits. As the series draws to a close, Jack's final words are 'thank you so Matt much, Matt'. The RSPCA turned up on my doorstep looking for an owl in distress. I rate it one wheelbarrow chicken out of five.

I would like to wrap up by saying that for a bunch of horrid harpies and harridans you have been very lovely and welcoming.

Now duck off.

These reviews are sublime.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Quoted myself (very JM of me) to add...

Wtf is she on? “Cabal of trolls are stealing photos of my son, oh by the way here’s some more photos of my son, oh and let me tell you about his underwear while I’m here.”

twit!

Honestly if there was a tier of her Patreon I could subscribe to that stopped her from sharing anything about a non consenting child then I would.

Is the allure of more free Tiggy + Bo stomach bile bags so great that she’s happy to discuss her son’s bodily fluids online? Wtf wtf wtf? And WE are the dangers yeah?

 

[Silver Linings]

OMG no. There’s certain things you don’t share let alone to a bunch of strangers. She could have all kinds following her.

It’s another oddity to add to the way she speaks about him. ‘Putting him to bed’ at 7.30, the ‘Found you, Mama’ when she got in, that time when she was talking about lockdown and the lack of childcare () and how she never had a moment alone even in the loo etc all makes him sound like a toddler. Now he’s old enough for teenage style behaviour all of a sudden.

I want to take back what my eyes have seen of and about the poor lamb. He’s not a Prince or a Kardashian/Beckham. As has been said, the fact that she has a son was part of her ‘canon origin story’, but nobody needed to know his name or ever see his face.

 

[Cuileann]

She called herself a '999 call handler' on the Election Blind Date piece on the BBC News. That was May 2017.

View attachment 244273

Video:

Toff and Jack Monroe's election blind date

Made in Chelsea star Toff and blogger Jack Monroe have very different views. Will they get on?

www.bbc.co.uk

But then a couple of months later (June/July?):

View attachment 244287

So which is it?

On a grunka so 99 percent sure the thread will have moved on by the time I post this, and also not related to Grenfell buttttt...

I remember watching that election blind date thing and being so impressed Toff whatsername...I am NOT a Tory voter (dear god no) and she is not someone who I have any familiarity or things in common with, but she was so sweet and polite and properly open minded...a really good example of how to listen and review and learn, unlike jack and her echo chamber of pre-approved followers repeating back everything she's said in a vacant yet approving way.

Jack will never learn anything from any one else and she is the most closed minded person I've ever come across. If you disagree with her, you are wrong (and probably an evil right wing poor hating Chile of baron.)

Toff was a really good example, I genuinely liked what I saw of her despite the fact she stands for the opposite of what I stand for (fox hunting ) and if it turns out she's actually a knob I might cry.

I'm tired and this is probably an irrelavant post so now duck off, thankyou xoxo