Jack Monroe #56 I, Jack Monroe

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Oh dear God, she's going to write a crime novel isn't she?
Going by previous promises it will be a BLM themed crime novel for children...
Jack: Reads two (2) crime novels
5 seconds later - I'm going to become a crime writer!
 
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Oh dear God, she's going to write a crime novel isn't she?
Going by previous promises it will be a BLM themed crime novel for children...
Could be why she keeps mentioning Ian Rankin. Probably wants to use him or his contacts. After all, he does live in ......Edinburgh.

I could never understand why Jack didn't just move into Louisa's house rather than the other way around. Maybe Louisa felt that once Jack came through the door, if the relationship went pearshaped, she would have a problem getting her out. Jack would have saved on the rent - I imagine that bungalow is expensive to rent.
 
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Good morning Cabal xxxx
On my usual Grunkal, still on last thread so will catch up soon, just wanted to add before i wipe my brain clean....

Picture of SB means she's got him for the weekend. She did it before. She had him for a day then fucked off to Edinburgh.
She has returned to SM after 'deleting the app' and posed for some bizarre and ghastly photos. She also did that just before she fucked off to Edinburgh.

Brace yourselves Scottish Fraus, she's probably getting on a train as we speak...
Can we in the words of Flower of Scotland "send them (her) homewords to think again
 
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Dear God...this is *exhausting*. A crime novel now? Give. Me. Strength. Wasn’t it her memoir last night? When I read that threat promise last night I almost banged my head on table...but then I thought a memoir is surely going to be impossible for her to write....every inconsistent tweet eventually gets deleted. You can’t do that with an actual...y’know....book....
So now I say, bring it on Jackie! Can’t wait 😊
 
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Oh dear God, she's going to write a crime novel isn't she?
Going by previous promises it will be a BLM themed crime novel for children...
She says she is going to do a lot of things. This will be just another failure to deliver. Besides, can you imagine her verbose flowery style working for crime? Actually it might be entertaining. But also, surely no crime, no matter how heinous can be worse than Jackie's life experiences.
 
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Oh dear God, she's going to write a crime novel isn't she?
Going by previous promises it will be a BLM themed crime novel for children...
Let me guess - the main protagonist will be a plucky food expert with a rags to riches origin story. 🧐
 
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Sorry to requote myself but i left it too late to edit!!
The similarity of the narrative too...
SB 'snarfed' that vile bowl of slop she gave him before her Edinburgh jaunt. Remember how he 'begged' for more and she'd made enough in the slow cooker for 3 days? They 'gorged' on the stew and shared dinner.
Gorged snarfed scarfed greedy goblin inhaled ...over on Instagram she's saying she's eaten hundreds of soleros. She wants to eat cheese with a spoon. She says she ate mayonnaise from the jar. She ate a packet + of biscuits in one evening in edinburgh. Really? Something is just off about all of this beyond being plain naff. I don't like how she writes about food. All rings false. A bit tinny sounding. Especially combined with all the thinspo bikini shots.
 
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Oh dear God, she's going to write a crime novel isn't she?
Going by previous promises it will be a BLM themed crime novel for children...
Jack's life reads like a crime novel. So many lies and red herrings, no witnesses, no alibi, lots of attempts at throwing the blame elsewhere, possible fraud, animal cruelty etc. She murdered curry when she put bananas into one 🤢We need to get Poirot on the case. He had refined tastes and would see through her nonexistent cooking skills. His pauvre estomac would suffer if he ate Jack's slop and goodness knows how that would affect the little gray cells.

Also re Ian Rankin, both he and Irvine Welsh were misguidedly returning the blue tick love in now deleted tweets way back on thread 46. Jack sure knows how to reel them in!
 
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Could be why she keeps mentioning Ian Rankin. Probably wants to use him or his contacts. After all, he does live in ......Edinburgh.

I could never understand why Jack didn't just move into Louisa's house rather than the other way around. Maybe Louisa felt that once Jack came through the door, if the relationship went pearshaped, she would have a problem getting her out. Jack would have saved on the rent - I imagine that bungalow is expensive to rent.
Could be one of several reasons or a combination

Not wanting to uproot her son, again.
Not wanting to move away from her childcare
Objections from her son's dad.
Louisa's property being to small or unsuitable - she doesn't have Allegra's level of wealth
Louisa not wanting Jack to move in for reasons as above.
 
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There was/is a tweet somewhere, where she offers Ian Rankin the opportunity to ‘collab’! I hope he declines her offer.
 
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Have not grunka’d the last pages of the last thread so apologies for any repetition fraus, but something I’ve noticed and a reason I find her so annoying on Twitter is her tone- it’s v technicallyRon/caitlin Moran 2009 jolly jolly pretend twitter is a pub bs and I hate it
ETA I hate it beyond the lies that have been pulled up and uncovered thread after thread
Yes! This. But also have you noticed there are two different twitter personas. For the blue tickets it’s jolly jolly Caitlin Moran, let’s all have lunch at the Groucho media buddies. For the Jackolytes it’s more highly vulnerable, melodramatic,prickly Angelina Jolie in Girl Interrupted type thing.
 
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Gorged snarfed scarfed greedy goblin inhaled ...over on Instagram she's saying she's eaten hundreds of soleros. She wants to eat cheese with a spoon. She says she ate mayonnaise from the jar. She ate a packet + of biscuits in one evening in edinburgh. Really? Something is just off about all of this beyond being plain naff. I don't like how she writes about food. All rings false. A bit tinny sounding. Especially combined with all the thinspo bikini shots.
I think she does have an eating disorder of some sort. It comes across as a love hate relationship with food. She likes junk food or pretends to. I suspect she binges and fasts alternately. If she is telling the truth than it is a very unhealthy attitude to eating and of course she does nothing to protect vulnerable SM users who might be triggered by her provocative posts (provocative in what she writes rather than the bikini pics). Additionally she wants to come across as diminutive and cutesy but with a huge appetite which she describes in self deprecating terms. I remember one DKL episode after Matt had cooked, she said something like 'mmm breakfast' and proceeded to tuck in with gusto. It seemed to me like it was more than hunger. Also the Edinburgh Uni talk where she possesivly brings her bowl of pretzels on stage. It's a bit strange. That being said, eating is a sensory experience and some people with or out being on the spectrum need that sensory experience
 
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Hello! I have been BUSY the last couple of days and there’s been a lot to catch up on. I haven’t finished all of the last thread and after reading the lovely summary from Pocahontas, I’m not rushing backwards...

I mentioned before that I was abused when I was younger. I really, really hope that JM wasn’t lying about this and even after all she’s been caught out with, I don’t think she would. It’s the boy who cried wolf though really and I don’t blame anyone for wondering if it was just another “Jack”.

I reported by abuse to the Police and 100% felt believed by both the Police and the Procurator Fiscal. There just wasn’t enough evidence.

I don’t what it is but I’ve felt a different vibe to the last couple of threads. Can’t put my finger on what it is exactly, it’s just...different.
 
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