Jack Monroe #468 Remove my photo! Warned!

[LavaFlake]

I have a theory about Jack and her parents. You know how it’s often said on here that she has this odd dichotomy of wanting to be both admired and pitied? I think that is literally the influence of her father and mother.
Admired comes from her father, she must have grown up seeing Big D being lauded from all corners and wanted a bit of that. It’s where her ridiculous attempts at swagger and toughness come from too. She’d love to be ex army, ex firefighter, have the scars and stories to show for it, to hint she’s stared into the void, done things, seen things. She wants to be tank girl, but ends up as twonk girl.
Pitied comes from her mother. Her mum, afaik, really does have some form of arthritis and maybe even walks with a stick. I bet she grew up hearing about how her poor mum works so hard, either as a nurse or later a fosterer. How how good and selfless her mum is, how she keeps going despite the pain. She also wants that, to be the martyr, bravely carrying on through the tears and pain, because her work is so important.
I hope that makes some sense, I’m still full of Covid and brain fog.

This makes perfect sense to me dear heart. She's truly like a magpie picking up and stealing other people's personalities and lived experiences.

 

[ForgettyBetty]

... in the 00s, hate preacher (and possibly master of maverick can opening tricks Jack could never aspire to) Abu Hamza called me a bleep as I tripped a bit trying to swerve him on a pavement.

But you’re not the one making Dorito tamales for the next 35+ years so yar boo sucks

 

[The carlin]

FFS Frank.

You really had to go there?

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

And remember in Guardian comments (I think???) someone reasonably asked her if SB should've gone to his dad for a while during the Poverty.
She flew off the handle about 'well pardon me for not wanting MY SON to be handed over just anybody' (or words to that effect).
Whereas as Jack paints it, it is patently obvious somebody in authority (as family and friends seemed blind to it) should have been looking out for that little lad

And yet he was fine being looked after by his dad/someone else when she was living it up in the States for 10 days.

 

[Hollaaa]

Whenever we have cream in the house it eventually becomes part of the “guess what I used to be” game when we clean the fridge

Bin juice pesto à la mode.

 

[Helatruralhome]

(ss from @KebabGirl on thread 114)

Jack reminds me of Kathy Burke's character from gimme gimme gimme

 

[StatusWoe]

I'm sure this has been discussed before I discovered these threads but how does she square her brown-nosing Nigella Mum with Nigella being a massive Tory?

You could ask that question the other way round as well.

I was listening again to the Greenbelt talk. Crikey she lays on thick there. Crying. But come the s*icide attempt (about 20 mins in) -

Which talk was this and is there a link?

 

[The carlin]

Jack reminds me of Kathy Burke's character from gimme gimme gimme

Exactly!

Linda la Hughes was delusional that her lack of success wasn't down to lack of talent but because other people were bastards. Also always wanging on about how gorgeous and sexy she was.

 

[Helatruralhome]

Exactly!

Linda la Hughes was delusional that her lack of success wasn't down to lack of talent but because other people were bastards. Also always wanging on about how gorgeous and sexy she was.

Also a lot of confusion about her age too

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Unruly labia swinging in the wind

Elton John's original lyrics needed a second pass

 

[Smol Pixel]

Which talk was this and is there a link?

From 2017. It was posted towards the end of the last thread I think.

 

[StatusWoe]

From 2017. It was posted towards the end of the last thread I think.

Thanks, I'll have a look!

 

[ChaosCEO]

What kind of household has stray pots of cream lying around?

Particularly a household run by someone who only does a £20 a week shop, who METICULOUSLY, PAINSTAKINGLY, and FORENSICALLY plans every meal to make the most of her meagre grocery haul… something smells fishy, and it’s not Jack’s grapefruit and tuna soup.

I remember when I first visited this forum and saw speculation that Jack had regular Ocado deliveries and I thought it sounded a bit far-fetched. Oh to be so young and innocent again!

I spent a while longer not being fully sold on the ‘collapsing nose’ claims. Having just rewatched the shower twanging video reposted by @Valiofthedolls, though, I can see that the evidence is actually quite compelling.

 

[Smol Pixel]

Thanks, I'll have a look!

Found it for you. It was several levels of quote post down.

Jack Monroe #353 Jack Monroe campaigns for Jack Monroe not to be in poverty

If anyone wants to take a break from Jack's chaos and head over to Insta, Tracie Morrissey is going into an internet deep dive on 'comedian' Dane Cook and I'm here for it. Exactly up our street. She did a cracking thread on Hilaria Baldwin back in the day, as well as Jameela Jamil. She's kinda...

tattle.life

 

[SweetTransvestite]

I have a theory about Jack and her parents. You know how it’s often said on here that she has this odd dichotomy of wanting to be both admired and pitied? I think that is literally the influence of her father and mother.
Admired comes from her father, she must have grown up seeing Big D being lauded from all corners and wanted a bit of that. It’s where her ridiculous attempts at swagger and toughness come from too. She’d love to be ex army, ex firefighter, have the scars and stories to show for it, to hint she’s stared into the void, done things, seen things. She wants to be tank girl, but ends up as twonk girl.
Pitied comes from her mother. Her mum, afaik, really does have some form of arthritis and maybe even walks with a stick. I bet she grew up hearing about how her poor mum works so hard, either as a nurse or later a fosterer. How how good and selfless her mum is, how she keeps going despite the pain. She also wants that, to be the martyr, bravely carrying on through the tears and pain, because her work is so important.
I hope that makes some sense, I’m still full of Covid and brain fog.

Yes absolutely. This 100%.
Notice how (even in the very Jack-centric world of Jack) every single blog, thread, podcast, whatever, she ALWAYS casts herself very firmly at the centre and is either hero or victim.

 

[Ablemabel]

BiB: no matter how many times I think about the ridiculousness of this, it’s nothing compared to seeing it written down.

It's completely batshit! We are supposed to believe that someone so poor that they do not have a colander, DOES have a load of climbing gear knocking about?

Half of the tips are completely stupid and the other half are completely obvious. None helpful.

---

Particularly a household run by someone who only does a £20 a week shop, who METICULOUSLY, PAINSTAKINGLY, and FORENSICALLY plans every meal to make the most of her meagre grocery haul… something smells fishy, and it’s not Jack’s grapefruit and tuna soup.

I remember when I first visited this forum and saw speculation that Jack had regular Ocado deliveries and I thought it sounded a bit far-fetched. Oh to be so young and innocent again!

I spent a while longer not being fully sold on the ‘collapsing nose’ claims. Having just rewatched the shower twanging video reposted by @Valiofthedolls, though, I can see that the evidence is actually quite compelling.

I watched the young Jack Guardian video this morning as well as the Boulevard singintheshowerfest and yes, you really see it!

 

[StatusWoe]

Found it for you. It was several levels of quote post down.

Jack Monroe #353 Jack Monroe campaigns for Jack Monroe not to be in poverty

If anyone wants to take a break from Jack's chaos and head over to Insta, Tracie Morrissey is going into an internet deep dive on 'comedian' Dane Cook and I'm here for it. Exactly up our street. She did a cracking thread on Hilaria Baldwin back in the day, as well as Jameela Jamil. She's kinda...

tattle.life

Thanks for finding it. I went to the previous thread and ended up rewatching Jack's awful Tom Waits cover. I might need to wait until the nausea passes before I listen to this one.

 

[ChaosCEO]

That, what I can only assume is bread and butter pudding, looks like she's spatchcocked a baby sloth.

Please don’t give her any more recipe ideas

I love that your profile pic is Holly Golightly because it makes me hear the phrase “she’s spatchcocked a baby sloth” in Audrey’s voice

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

It's completely batshit! We are supposed to believe that someone so poor that they do not have a colander, DOES have a load of climbing gear knocking about?

Exactly!

In what world does someone not have a colander that you can buy for £1 from Home Bargains/pound shop type places but has three carabiners?

 

[NellieBoo]

It looks like John Merrick, god rest that poor man’s soul.

That's me going straight to hell in a hand cart. I just laughed so loud I startled my dogs who were all softly, gently snoozing and minding their own business .