Jack Monroe #468 Remove my photo! Warned!

[jenny2603]

It’s that awkward thing though isn’t it? She can’t actually sue them because if she did she’d have to be open about her finances to show that she’s lost money/work from the allegations.

At the point she opens that can of unrinsed hoops HMRC, Patreon subs and everyone else in the world will be after.

At this point until May it’s basically Schrödinger's court case - she is simultaneously suing and not suing Tory Lee.

After the supposed statute of limitations? Well then she’s fucked anyway.

£10 says that come May she will have been advised by her doctor and team of specialists that she is not well enough to go ahead with the court case, even though her legal team were confident of success.

 

[Jelly Bean]

Hahaha I was sort of joking - but I just listened again to the Greenbelt talk and at 14 mins in she says during a dramatic pause 'dramatic pause'
I'm 100% convinced she didn't mean to say that aloud

 

[Elastoblast]

It’s ice cream made from leftover stollen and “stray pots of cream lying around” after Christmas for a lucky, lucky friend she’s not seeing til a week later. I think I’d rather take my chances with the spatchcocked sloth.

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Jeesus. Imagine being an actual friend of Jack and having to accept gifts like this...knowing you will be teetering on the brink of food poisoning if you take even a polite "mmm yummy but I'm still full from breakfast" teeny bite

 

[jenny2603]

It’s ice cream made from leftover stollen and “stray pots of cream lying around” after Christmas for a lucky, lucky friend she’s not seeing til a week later. I think I’d rather take my chances with the spatchcocked sloth.

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God, is there anything worse than not knowing what to do with all those stray pots of cream one has lying about? Thanks for all that you do, Jack.

 

[Cookiecookie]

That, what I can only assume is bread and butter pudding, looks like she's spatchcocked a baby sloth.

I wasn't sure if it was some kind of frozen horror.

ETA, Vali got there first!

 

[GazpachoPolice]

As she’s quiet and no doubt Farrow and Balling it up some brand new walls, I thought you might enjoy a rainbow smorgasbord trip down memory lane from everyone’s favourite understudy narrator.

I bring you, Jack and the Amazing Technicolor Slopbowls

Spoiler

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“What? Lil Ol’ Me?”

Spoiler

“Why yes, yes I AM too pretty to be poor! Thankspaceyou for noticing! Now, just how rich are you?”
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It was: red and yellow and green and SLOP!!!!

 

[Veronicaaa]

It’s ice cream made from leftover stollen and “stray pots of cream lying around” after Christmas for a lucky, lucky friend she’s not seeing til a week later. I think I’d rather take my chances with the spatchcocked sloth.

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But like ................ WHY has she put two MASSIVE slices of bread stollen on top of the ice cream????

 

[jordishaw]

I'm sure this has been discussed before I discovered these threads but how does she square her brown-nosing Nigella Mum with Nigella being a massive Tory?

I don't think political beliefs are hereditary?

 

[Ablemabel]

It’s ice cream made from leftover stollen and “stray pots of cream lying around” after Christmas for a lucky, lucky friend she’s not seeing til a week later. I think I’d rather take my chances with the spatchcocked sloth.

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Can't move for stray pots of cream here.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

One last thing about that 2013 article and stuff I posted at the end of the last thread where Jack wrote that horrible weaponized blog post and deliberately caused a massive pile on of the author, then I’ll shut(space)up about it.

I’ve just learned that author of the original post was not a professional journalist but an undergraduate university student

 

[Lucky Escape]

Blackwell's are selling signed copies of Grifty Kitchen for £5 more than the unsigned version:

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I'm sure this has been discussed before I discovered these threads but how does she square her brown-nosing Nigella Mum with Nigella being a massive Tory?

It’s ok. Her entire matriarchal line and many of her former lovers have been Tories, so she’s thinking Nigella will just slot on in there (so to speak)

 

[The carlin]

It’s ice cream made from leftover stollen and “stray pots of cream lying around” after Christmas for a lucky, lucky friend she’s not seeing til a week later. I think I’d rather take my chances with the spatchcocked sloth.

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For the love of God! Its worse than I even could have imagined!

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

Sorry, listening to that Greenbelt thing some more she used to sit in bed at night thinking up petty crimes so she could go to jail so she‘d get three meals a day?

And yet the reason she didn’t tell her comfortably off family that she was starving was because she was worried her son would be taken into care? WHAT DOES SHE THINK HAPPENS TO CHILDREN WHOSE MUMS ARE INCARCERATED?

I really hope some of the audience walked out.

An PMSL at ‘dramatic pause’

 

[Cucumberthunder]

A frau mentioned fostering - I'm surprised she's not inserted herself into those discussions - kids leaving care (foster/state) can be left starting out with nothing - so a guide for starting a kitchen from scratch could've been useful. She could've taken after Dave and advocated for them to receive additional support/benefits (oh wait afaik Dave on advocated for the foster carers to get extra cash).
You'd think that would be up in her niche (oh err) as she'd have loads of misery stories to appropriate!

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Sorry, listening to that Greenbelt thing some more she used to sit in bed at night thinking up petty crimes so she could go to jail so she‘d get three meals a day?



An PMSL at ‘dramatic pause’

bleeping hell, save us all from “Three Hots and a Cot” Monroe.

I’m guessing that one didn’t get the desired response so it didn’t join the playbook of Jack Monroe’s increasingly exaggerated all-time greats (aka massive bleeping lies).

 

[stunrw]

Im still trying to fathom what that white slop is

 

[Smol Pixel]

Not many likes on that last attention seeking post are there? Considering her massive Glastonbury sized following ? 777k views as well. 1616 likes. Many of those might be “off you go then” likes as well. Oh dear. Time to get a REAL job Jack pal. Why don’t you become an HCA and do stuff for others ?

Oh god no, please don’t suggest a public facing job. No one deserves Jack inflicted upon them. She needs to work in a dark little stock room or something where she can let her inner goblin shine.

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

£10 says that come May she will have been advised by her doctor and team of specialists that she is not well enough to go ahead with the court case, even though her legal team were confident of success.

 

[EllaEm87]

I stumbled on Professor Greens Insta and even he has more food and signposting content in the last year than Jack.