Jack Monroe #461 Addiction cosplay from a peddler of monetised fairy stories

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

Post title by @Foxvint nominated by @Livia Fantasy

Please see the pink button wiki if you are new here, and please nominate new thread titles after post 500, no swearsies.

Jack is dropping hints about people lending her their nice holiday cottages so she can "make memories" with her son after ignoring him all summer.

Grifty Kitchen is dropping like a stone down the best-seller charts.

She's getting very defensive about the fact that The Trussell Trust aren't letting povs maim themselves with hammers and aren't distributing the book without a disclaimer.

 

[Katkat]

I miss Foghorn Beghorn.

 

[fishyfishfish]

Seeing a friend tomorrow for her belated 30th birthday party, and I’ve got her a selection of books as a gift. When I found out this week that she’s a fellow Frau, I knew immediately what I had to do.
I’m pleased to report that my local independent bookseller did not have a single copy of GK in stock. The owner must be a good egg.

 

[jenny2603]

I miss Foghorn Beghorn.

Farewell Foghorn Beghorn (RIP) you're with the angles now. Gone but never forgotten.

 

[Jelly Bean]

Seeing a friend tomorrow for her belated 30th birthday party, and I’ve got her a selection of books as a gift. When I found out this week that she’s a fellow Frau, I knew immediately what I had to do.
I’m pleased to report that my local independent bookseller did not have a single copy of GK in stock. The owner must be a good egg.

I was looking at that photo for so long before I remembered Grifty Kitchen isn't *actually* called Grifty Kitchen

 

[Emmapism]

I miss Foghorn Beghorn.

We barely knew ye

 

[The carlin]

Seeing a friend tomorrow for her belated 30th birthday party, and I’ve got her a selection of books as a gift. When I found out this week that she’s a fellow Frau, I knew immediately what I had to do.
I’m pleased to report that my local independent bookseller did not have a single copy of GK in stock. The owner must be a good egg.

sorry if I'm being stupid. Have you put a fake cover on one of the books you're giving her?

If so, excellent trolling , chapeau

ETA. Just realised that title isn't the real one,

Brilliant

 

[Potatoes O’Houlihan]

Just a notable addition to the recap - Fraus have been spotting the Dire Tome in the wild and top Frau @Lazarus did the Lord's work by plopping copies of GK into the dustbin in Tesco as well as into a roll cage full of waste

 

[Vinbisha]

I was looking at that photo for so long before I remembered Grifty Kitchen isn't *actually* called Grifty Kitchen

Frau, same. Send new glasses-prescriptionos.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Seeing a friend tomorrow for her belated 30th birthday party, and I’ve got her a selection of books as a gift. When I found out this week that she’s a fellow Frau, I knew immediately what I had to do.
I’m pleased to report that my local independent bookseller did not have a single copy of GK in stock. The owner must be a good egg.

Haha you should print her out one of the Jack collages and use it for wrapping paper

 

[fishyfishfish]

sorry if I'm being stupid. Have you put a fake cover on one of the books you're giving her?

If so, excellent trolling , chapeau

Damn right I have! Paper clipped on so as not to ruin the actual book. It is wrapped and sandwiched between the other two…I cannot wait to see her reaction!

 

[Lucy Aeroplane]

Recap: it’s become increasingly apparent both IRL and online that the Guardian article has completely screwed her. It seems that, oddly enough, people really don’t like it when someone takes their donated money, does naff-all work, gets off their tits on booze and forty tramadols*, uses the money to buy Cotswold sideboards and presumably booze, and then jokes about it in the national press. Then lies about the accompanying photoshoot. And still does nothing to address food poverty in the UK. Or even just in Essex.


edited to add she also lied about the cost of the sideboards, they’re far more expensive than £300 a pop



*At least, so Jack reckons; Frauen maintain she would in fact be DEAD if that had ever happened because after forty tramadol she would have STOPPED BREATHING.

 

[Showmewhereisaidthat]

Made a rare trip to the city centre today so popped into Waterstones (obviously I had my cap on and sleeves pulled down) Imagine my surprise....not 1 copy of Grifty Kitchen to be seen.
Makes you think...

 

[SusieTCones]

I miss Foghorn Beghorn.

Disappointed that "At least I *know* I'm unhinged" came too late for a thread title nomination.

 

[Foxvint]

I'd like to thank the academy, my family and God. Now I need to go asda to find someone from my past who said I'd never amount to anything, make eye contact, hold up my phone to show the thread title and slink smugly away

 

[imBUSY]

@confusedlady I think that she meant the EA cream was her pre-game ritual, so to speak, before speaking engagements, which she then replaced with booze before speaking.

But it's Jack so

 

[Cucumberthunder]

We moved house a week before my due date, having been in a stressful chain where a previous buyer had pulled out and we were relaxing on the goodwill of the seller not to go back on the market (which they did after a week). We were both still working full time - the moving day (Friday) was the first day of my maternity leave. My husband went back to work on the Monday until I took up residence in the hospital.

She's not special. She's not in a difficult circumstance. She is bang average.

 

[AyiaKnacker]

That rental deposit is gone Isn’t it? Poor land lady trying to get drywipe marker off the grout in the kitchen tiles. She‘ll need to retile. Probably best to take a match to the whole kitchen to get rid of the lingering slop honk.

Please note Jack that any arson should occur AFTER you’ve left you deluded slop gibbon.. I wish no harm on your person, just righteous legal and karmic justice.

 

[I'm not actually here]

We barely knew ye

There will be plenty of time for Foghorn Beghorn Part 2.

 

[AyiaKnacker]

We moved from Scotland to England (and not just over the border) when my eldest was 6 days old. Did not make a fuss. Mainly cos of shell shock probably.