Jack Monroe #431 Close your begs, woman!

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Congrats @Bugger13 and @Ooointitot for the banging new thread title. You each win one of SB’s roller skates.

Jack had LEFT Twitter again and the canal awaits her appearance in Wales on Wednesday with bated breath.

Go well tender ones x
 
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From the book acknowledgements in the previous thread, I wonder which of the publishing house staff was the one that Jack threw a book at....
 
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Jack flailed around defending her lack of transparency about Teemill.

She was called out on a blatant falsehood about living in only white-painted rented boxes for decades. This calling out promoted her to rage-post some screenshots from her phone, but forgot to crop out the camera reel which included a Google image search of her with Allegra (how embarrassing) and a Wetherspoons meal with a nice foamy pint. Unclear who the pint belonged to.
It's also unclear why this particular best-ever house is so much different in the decorating stakes.
Jack flounced from Twitter, again.
 
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Jack also clarified that the Tiffany earrings, which magically disappear when she uses portrait mode on her phone, were a present from Old Harold. She USED to have a pair of Etsy dupes, which she simultaneously was never photoed wearing; and at the same time was scorned for. Maybe by Michael Portillo, or Edwina? - details are hazy.
 
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You know, seeing those food photos and then being reminded of ALL THE AWARDS, makes me call into question, well, everything 🤷🏻‍♀️
 
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Jack wanged on for hours about the Heckin Big Declutter and introduced us to Painter Boy in swoony, 90's chicklit tweets. Which is a glorious Sign from the universe because Jack has been planning decorating schemes at the moment! Hinted at buying because this was the dream she had been practicing for ALL OF HER ADULT LIFE with her previous 344 moves and too right she's going to grab it with both hands. But then declared her new landlord as The Bestest Ever. Except, she said she doesn't know if she has the property yet 🤔.
 
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Haunted bird app message from the agency that represents Jack. If the pov cosplaying dries up as a source of income, perhaps they could use their connections to get her a role on this show? "You've got to pick a Patreon or two..."
I can just see her as the Artful Dodger, accent and all 😂
 
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100% certain she isn't moving to a one bedroom flat. What I'm sure she'll do is limit any photos to give the impression of it being a small and oh so cosy little place (with freshly painted walls, naturally). But she'll slip up. She won't be able to resist a humblebrag about something or other that will clearly show she's got plenty of rooms.

Can someone explain tax free matched betting to me? It sounds a little shady. Apologies if it's all above board.
 
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Can someone explain tax free matched betting to me? It sounds a little shady. Apologies if it's all above board.
Place a bet on team A to win on Bet fair.
Place a bet for team A to lose on Betfred.

Either way you 'win'

If, however, one of the bets was a free promotional free bet, you win more.

So a free bet on team A to win
A paid bet on team A to lose.
If team A win, you've covered your loss and made a profit.

People can win some good cash, but the people who make big bucks at matched betting are the website owner's that automate all the bets for people for a percentage of the winnings.
 
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100% certain she isn't moving to a one bedroom flat. What I'm sure she'll do is limit any photos to give the impression of it being a small and oh so cosy little place (with freshly painted walls, naturally). But she'll slip up. She won't be able to resist a humblebrag about something or other that will clearly show she's got plenty of rooms.

Can someone explain tax free matched betting to me? It sounds a little shady. Apologies if it's all above board.
Yeah It'll be somewhere with a dining room, office or large kitchen/lounge/diner that can be separated off quite easily plus the bedroom will have an ensuite or something.


I've been pondering over how awful it will be for her new neighbours to find it's Jack moving in 😱.
 
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Can someone explain tax free matched betting to me? It sounds a little shady. Apologies if it's all above board.
No doubt there are some shady characters trying to monetise “training courses” etc. in matched betting, which should be avoided like the plague, but the concept is sound and above board. There used to be a section on it on MoneySavngExpert, which if still there will explain it far better than I can.

🔺I’ve done it a long time ago and made a decent profit out of it (around £1500). Its quite hard to make that much these days IMO as bookies are much more switched onto betting patterns associated to it and quickly throttle down your maximum bet to make it impossible to continue.

The simplest way I can describe it is that it is essentially a method for extracting money from the bookies who offer “free bets”. So for example if there’s a £50 free bet on the winner of the Grand National, you bet on horse X with that bookie, and lay horse X elsewhere (I.e. also bet against it winning). In that way you’ve covered all outcomes so will be able to get ~90% of the “free bet” back in your winnings (the other 10% being the spread/bookie’s margin) and cash out.

Not something to do IMO unless you are good at quickly doing Big Maths as one slip could mean that you’ve lost a lot.

Edited to add: Also stay away if you enjoy the gambling/excitement side of betting. If you move away from the absolutely clinical mathematical method that is required then you will be guaranteed to lose, as normal gambling is a total mug’s game.
 
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@That Forensic Man - re timings, I believe as @colouredlines said, the timeline goes something like this:
xmas 2011 - pov in small flat, no jam, much cry
xmas 2012 - Sunday people article and bbc video thing, much jam
xmas 2013 - jam today, jam tomorrow, celebration of the miracle that is Jack, much grift
 
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Forgive me as I haven’t done full grunks yet but I was absolutely outraged at this, which has to be the most blatant lie ever….
Not only is it a lie, but this "strategy" doesn't make any sense. Buying several skinny carrots by weight means you're also paying for every carrot's greenery, and you'll also get less carrot after they're peeled. Buy one big carrot instead and (gasp, what a concept) save some money while getting more carrot.
 
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It will be interesting to see where she goes from here.

She's finished on the haunted bird hellscape. (Never really understood why she spent so much time on it when she always speaks in such derogatory terms about it)

She's burnt all bridges with the celeb cooking community

Even the Graun have fucked her off.

She might have to pull out a Christmas song duetting with RSM.
 
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