Jack Monroe #407 I lost hours yesterday learning about a Jack Monroe

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Thread title brought to us by Ms Sawyer (@Veronicaaa ) and @Menopausal Stormtrooper - coined by a squig to whom we'd like to pass on the message: babe, same x Your prizes are a glass of deliciously stagnant water rower juice and a copy of James Martin's Potatoes.

Jack is aff it (Twitter, that is), temporarily I'm sure, so we are back to counting - @That Forensic Man has made a list, we love a list: https://tattle.life/threads/jack-monroe-406-foodbank-anna-delvey.33853/post-11943385

Please add recaps, read the Wiki and nominate your thread titles without swears towards the end of the thread.
 
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Recap:

Jack didn't tweet but a parody account did. Some squigs couldn't tell the difference.

Newer Frau's were reassured that Jacks flounce was a regular occurrence, as were articles in Pink News about it.

A squig attempted to make Jacks Wintry Chicken Broth and demanded a refund.

After Jack posted a photo on Instagram of an entire drawer of knobs, there was much counting of Jacks possessions by the canal. A speedboat has yet to be found, but a cuddly toy was in attendance.
 
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PS this from thread 192 is when she did up her bedroom and announced it with great aplomb. Here’s the £400+ cage bird light that she shoved leaves in that’s pictured upthread. It actually looks like a more ornate version even before all the plastic crap all over it. Scroll down in this link and there are more pics.


Handles slightly different, but those two storage benches look VERY much like these minus their cushions.
View attachment 1612232
ETA not a cracked spine in the lot here. Also HOWLING at the bottom two titles (RIP). I forgot about this comedy gold.
View attachment 1612242

She said she couldn’t remember where it was from, but a frau triangulated the apothecary cabinet. FYI also, she was right out of rehab at the time and talking about how her “lifetime of trauma” was helping her rearrange her bedroom. So that expensive rehab and attendant therapy really worked and helped her reflect on her choices and bullshit, didn’t it?! View attachment 1612276
Don't forget the SPITE SOFA! 😘
That's a very low estimate for some things including the makeup e.g. three of her lipsticks were Chanel and would cost at least £85-£90 combined. Pretty sure she has some Le Creuset in there as well and I'm sure I read on one of the threads that she bought a £300 suit she wore for the Diva photoshoot?
Louisa bought her a £300 dyson hairdryer
If she bought less avocado on toast she could buy a house
What about her water rower? I believe that was a few hundred quid, have we got the John Lewis hammock on there, that was expensive
The cream Diva shoot trouser suit (never worn since). IRO £200.
Also the water rower
Has nobody spotted the expensive home edit storage from John Lewis? I suppose it’ll be left to me then, almost like everyone wants to stop me breathing. These are such a rip off, I have some tbf but they’re just plastic boxes. I bet Jack has loads more crammed in any area not already rammed with tit.
I remember a phase she had of photographing a huge office space with 1000s of books. Then there was all the furniture and set dressing for the shed outside that she was going to turn into a studio? That was a few years ago, but it all looked very expensive.
So I promise I’ll shut up about her furniture in the new thread, but is this another dresser?
View attachment 1612415Cos it certainly looks very very VERY much likeView attachment 1612417
Totally agree with @MrsFawlty upthread. She has posted FAR TOO MUCH online about her house, garden, possessions, herself, family, ‘friends’, animals etc etc. It’s laughable that all these furniture and other posts come from tit SHE has put out there while rinsing people (human beans) and pretending to be poor.
Oh yes the Perspex cube pasta storage with pink lids, in the kitchen (stunt pasta- levels never change) each of those was about £30 from JL or somewhere, weren’t they?
£20 on full set of oversized unicorns/animal mugs from Asda
The hen with the rubber eggs for nesting hens?
And god knows how much the dusty plastics string of pearls plant cost!
Don’t forget the water rower

View attachment 1612397
the sentient mirror
View attachment 1612394
The hammock
View attachment 1612449
another sideboard
View attachment 1612451
and surprise surprise we have played this game before

Expensive Nike trainers (about 3 pairs including the bright orange ones she said she had to get to match the running club’s colours which was a load of bollocks).
The ooni pizza oven, the “tiles” (3) for locating lost keys/ phones by internet magic, the smart mirror.
2 of these
View attachment 1612469
Dozen of these at least.
View attachment 1612471
It all adds up!
We even have A CUDDLY TOY (from Hamleys).
I very strongly suspect the Emin is just a framed biro scrawl on a paper napkin, which is why it was given to her in the first place and why we never see it.
Not knocking that, but something smells odd - the story is too ‘Jack’

Can we add her unread books to the £ list? I’m sure some are scrounged from her publisher, but she has shedloads, lots hardback

£428 fancy knobs (and counting)
£250 at least on magnetic Allegra spice jars
£315 at least (assuming there are only 7 but I think it’s more) on snake charmer kitchen baskets
£95 Abigail Aherne grey hare table lamp
£72 antique bird of paradise porcelain door knobs and finger plates (bedroom door)
(+£432 if she's done the other say 6 internal doors as well)
£25 wooden calculator (unused)
£35 two-headed Skellington dog plastic Halloween decoration
£100 pigskin hat
£339 All Saints belfern suede biker jacket
£155 Morris & Co. Strawberry Thief curtains (median price £65-245)
£1,550 Tiffany pearl hoop earrings sterling silver (two pairs)
£150 DM boots (other ones, not the willow ones mentioned upthread)
£104 rusty eBay spoons
£110 couple of Oliver Bonas jumpers
£80 Emma Bridgewater toaster with TOASTER on it
£780 At least two Burberry scarves: one for her and one for LJC
£110 Crosley cruiser suitcase turntable (bedroom)
£800 77 Lipsticks
£200 14 Foundations
£250 40 Eyeliners
£500 misc makeup
£320 2x Roberts Revival Mini radio
£158 orange nike trainers
£1,200 kendal dining chairs
£425 Graham and Green birdcage lampshade
£65 test tube vases
£35 boiler suit (which was dyed pink)
£10 squid game guard mask from the market
£44 per roll wallpaper used as ADHD friendly “to-do” list
£300 kitchen aid
£20 black pleather Primark boots with chain
£499 Dyson fan
£65 SimpleHuman hand soap dispenser (kitchen)
£60 squatty potty
£535 custom captain's chair
£110 Two pairs of granny curtain boiler suits
£400 Cotswold Company small sideboard (living room, blue)
£229 Cotswold Company tallboy (bedroom, ivory)
£799 Cotswold Company chester dove grey writing bureau (similar)
£849 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak dining table
£399 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak storage bench
£2,396 2x Cotswold Company chester dresser
£1,529 Cotswold Company chester grand dresser
£299 Cotswold Company bookcase (porch)
£800 2x Cotswold Company small sideboards
£499 Cotswold Company chester wine console
£599 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard
£699 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard (wine rack version)
£800 2x Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak shoe storage bench
£730 Cotswold Company chester dove grey extra large dresser top
£300 suit she wore for the Diva photoshoot
£300 dyson hairdryer
£850 water rower
£400 John Lewis hammock
£400 John Lewis egg chair
£400 20x John Lewis clear plastic storage bins
£290 Baywood 33 drawer tea chest
£30 John Lewis Perspex cube pasta storage with pink lids
£20 full set of oversized unicorns/animal mugs from Asda
£300 sentient mirror
£360 2x nike trainers (exc. orange ones)
£120 24" TV for SB's PlayStation
£2500 Smeg (double American style)
£300 2x Viv westwood dress (assume sale)
£75 Sweaty Betty leggings
£170 Lumie alarm clock
£200 R&P bras (x 2 minimum)
£199 Airpods
£249 Airpods pro
£199 Apple Watch (assume series 3)
£250 Sleeper to Edinburgh last min on a Friday
£309 3 nights at Eden Locke, Edinburgh
£170 Last minute train home on a Monday morning
£700 Vets bills
£20 Sad Asda shop
£80 2x summit camping stove (shed)
£400 ooni pizza oven (freebie)
£60 3x “tiles” for locating lost keys/phones by internet magic
£12 2x dylon machine dye
£180 12x moleskin notebooks
£1000 unread books
£100 CUDDLY TOY (Hamleys)
£640 6x DAB radios
Total: £34,476
(inc. Cotswold Company £11,027)

and surprise surprise we have played this game before
We've smashed the previous high score :m

Two Burberry Jackets (but I think they were pre-Patreon, correct?)
Shoes (not) left behind by stylist/left on after photo shoot? - I forget the brand these are
The new pair of boots she bought after wearing the taped together pair for a while on TV (despite having other pairs ...?)
Designer dog
304 Christmas tree decorations (many were 🔺 by clever fraus)
Botox
Fillers
Expensive haircuts
Artificial snow
many wigs
plastic flower headdress phase
“£5” denim cargo trousers from Primark
Multiple phones
Emin
SPITE SOFA
Le Creuset
furniture and set dressing for the shed outside that she was going to turn into a studio
lawnmower
bikes
tents
planting trough things
Ten (at least) outdoor chairs for her Mormon tabernacle Amish prayer circle fellowship things
The hen with the rubber eggs for nesting hens?
dusty plastics string of pearls plant
unread books
wallpaper backgrounds
Mary Poppins umbrella
 
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From the last thread. This is about the SMEG fridge.

Incorrect. Given to her by a friend and stored in a shed or similar for years because none of her kitchens have been big enough until 🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁 SHE DESIGNED HER OWN KITCHEN, THAT ALREADY EXISTED IN THE crappy BUNGLAOW ALONG WITH HER FIRST EVER OWNED OVEN WHICH HER LANDLORD ALLOWED HER TO PICK OUT HERSELF 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
She upgraded the gifted one. She now has the £2,000 American style side by side four door fridge freezer. The new SMEG is so big it wouldn't fit in her kitchen and has to stay in the 3rd hall adjacent to the (not) spiral staircase.
 
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Oh god the wigs. I had forgotten the wigs.
I think the wallpaper backgrounds might add up to a fair whack, too.
Mary Poppins umbrella we've had the price of before, not sure what the whole costume would run to.
 
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I know Fraus have been told off for counting (their own) chairs, teeth and spoons but I'm hoping the new counting is deemed acceptable because it highlights her spending habits whilst declaring herself the poorest pixie ever?
 
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On this list of possessions, there is talk of expensive trainers bought for a running club phase. As a running Frau, I'd be highly interested to read details if anyone can point me towards the correct thread. Ta x
 
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From the last thread. This is about the SMEG fridge.



She upgraded the gifted one. She now has the £2,000 American style side by side four door fridge freezer. The new SMEG is so big it wouldn't fit in her kitchen and has to stay in the 3rd hall adjacent to the (not) spiral staircase.
Ahhhhhh thankyou! This is new information to me. I think?
Clarity appreciated ❤
 
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Have we listed the outside studio and shed stuff? At least two fancy gas camping stoves, lawnmower, bikes, tents, planting trough things we never heard another word about. Ten (at least) outdoor chairs for her Mormon tabernacle Amish prayer circle fellowship things.
 
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I vaguely remember one set of airpods being explained away by Jack as gifted - part of lockdown broadcast from home equipment. The proximity to ears during the plague times meant they couldn't be returned.

Even more vague memories of one falling in the slop but that might have been a Jackjoke.
 
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£428 fancy knobs (and counting)
£250 at least on magnetic Allegra spice jars
£315 at least (assuming there are only 7 but I think it’s more) on snake charmer kitchen baskets
£95 Abigail Aherne grey hare table lamp
£72 antique bird of paradise porcelain door knobs and finger plates (bedroom door)
(+£432 if she's done the other say 6 internal doors as well)
£25 wooden calculator (unused)
£35 two-headed Skellington dog plastic Halloween decoration
£100 pigskin hat
£339 All Saints belfern suede biker jacket
£155 Morris & Co. Strawberry Thief curtains (median price £65-245)
£1,550 Tiffany pearl hoop earrings sterling silver (two pairs)
£150 DM boots (other ones, not the willow ones mentioned upthread)
£104 rusty eBay spoons
£110 couple of Oliver Bonas jumpers
£80 Emma Bridgewater toaster with TOASTER on it
£780 At least two Burberry scarves: one for her and one for LJC
£110 Crosley cruiser suitcase turntable (bedroom)
£800 77 Lipsticks
£200 14 Foundations
£250 40 Eyeliners
£500 misc makeup
£960 6x Roberts Revival Mini radio (assumed)
£158 orange nike trainers
£1,200 kendal dining chairs
£425 Graham and Green birdcage lampshade
£65 test tube vases
£35 boiler suit (which was dyed pink)
£10 squid game guard mask from the market
£44 per roll wallpaper used as ADHD friendly “to-do” list
£300 kitchen aid
£20 black pleather Primark boots with chain
£499 Dyson fan
£65 SimpleHuman hand soap dispenser (kitchen)
£60 squatty potty
£535 custom captain's chair
£110 Two pairs of granny curtain boiler suits
£400 Cotswold Company small sideboard (living room, blue)
£229 Cotswold Company tallboy (bedroom, ivory)
£799 Cotswold Company chester dove grey writing bureau (similar)
£849 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak dining table
£399 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak storage bench
£2,396 2x Cotswold Company chester dresser
£1,529 Cotswold Company chester grand dresser
£299 Cotswold Company bookcase (porch)
£800 2x Cotswold Company small sideboards
£499 Cotswold Company chester wine console
£599 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard
£699 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard (wine rack version)
£800 2x Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak shoe storage bench
£730 Cotswold Company chester dove grey extra large dresser top
£300 suit she wore for the Diva photoshoot
£300 dyson hairdryer
£850 water rower
£400 John Lewis hammock
£400 John Lewis egg chair
£400 20x John Lewis clear plastic storage bins
£290 Baywood 33 drawer tea chest
£30 John Lewis Perspex cube pasta storage with pink lids
£20 full set of oversized unicorns/animal mugs from Asda
£300 sentient mirror
£360 2x nike trainers (exc. orange ones)
£120 24" TV for SB's PlayStation
£2500 Smeg (double American style)
£300 2x Viv westwood dress (assume sale)
£75 Sweaty Betty leggings
£170 Lumie alarm clock
£200 R&P bras (x 2 minimum)
£199 Airpods
£249 Airpods pro
£199 Apple Watch (assume series 3)
£250 Sleeper to Edinburgh last min on a Friday
£309 3 nights at Eden Locke, Edinburgh
£170 Last minute train home on a Monday morning
£700 Vets bills
£20 Sad Asda shop
£40 summit camping stove (shed)
£400 ooni pizza oven (freebie)
£60 3x “tiles” for locating lost keys/phones by internet magic
£12 2x dylon machine dye
£180 12x moleskin notebooks
£1000 unread books
£100 CUDDLY TOY (Hamleys)
Total: £34,436
(inc. Cotswold Company £11,027)


We've smashed the previous high score :m

Two Burberry Jackets (but I think they were pre-Patreon, correct?)
Shoes (not) left behind by stylist/left on after photo shoot? - I forget the brand these are
The new pair of boots she bought after wearing the taped together pair for a while on TV (despite having other pairs ...?)
Designer dog
304 Christmas tree decorations (many were 🔺 by clever fraus)
Botox
Fillers
Expensive haircuts
Artificial snow
many wigs
plastic flower headdress phase
“£5” denim cargo trousers from Primark
Multiple phones
Emin
SPITE SOFA
Le Creuset
furniture and set dressing for the shed outside that she was going to turn into a studio
The hen with the rubber eggs for nesting hens?
dusty plastics string of pearls plant
unread books
That is amazingly FORENSIC and I have no idea how you’re keeping track, but a minor correction
50F7919D-12B8-44B6-887D-5DBCCDE76968.jpeg
She has 2 roberts radios AND six DAB digital radios (the digitals are the radios in every room tuned to the “room appropriate” channels). So 8 radios/radiae

For anyone joining at this thread, every single Cotswold company piece has been photographed and posted online by Jack- evidence matching up her posted pics with those items on the Cotswold site is in the last thread. None of that is conjecture- it’s all there, posted by Princess Pov.

ETA 🥕
 
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Bringin this over from the last thread because it closed before I could post so you clearly wanted me to STOP BREATHING

I'm actually incensed by this for some reason.

The ooni was gifted, that boiled my piss as I actually had to do loads of overtime to buy mine, I contacted them and they were quite happy for her to have one
Because Jack's pov audience is exactly who they target for a £300 pizza oven - amirite?

How to prove she is middle class along with her followers in one swift move. Cheers Ooni x
 
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£428 fancy knobs (and counting)
£250 at least on magnetic Allegra spice jars
£315 at least (assuming there are only 7 but I think it’s more) on snake charmer kitchen baskets
£95 Abigail Aherne grey hare table lamp
£72 antique bird of paradise porcelain door knobs and finger plates (bedroom door)
(+£432 if she's done the other say 6 internal doors as well)
£25 wooden calculator (unused)
£35 two-headed Skellington dog plastic Halloween decoration
£100 pigskin hat
£339 All Saints belfern suede biker jacket
£155 Morris & Co. Strawberry Thief curtains (median price £65-245)
£1,550 Tiffany pearl hoop earrings sterling silver (two pairs)
£150 DM boots (other ones, not the willow ones mentioned upthread)
£104 rusty eBay spoons
£110 couple of Oliver Bonas jumpers
£80 Emma Bridgewater toaster with TOASTER on it
£780 At least two Burberry scarves: one for her and one for LJC
£110 Crosley cruiser suitcase turntable (bedroom)
£800 77 Lipsticks
£200 14 Foundations
£250 40 Eyeliners
£500 misc makeup
£960 6x Roberts Revival Mini radio (assumed)
£158 orange nike trainers
£1,200 kendal dining chairs
£425 Graham and Green birdcage lampshade
£65 test tube vases
£35 boiler suit (which was dyed pink)
£10 squid game guard mask from the market
£44 per roll wallpaper used as ADHD friendly “to-do” list
£300 kitchen aid
£20 black pleather Primark boots with chain
£499 Dyson fan
£65 SimpleHuman hand soap dispenser (kitchen)
£60 squatty potty
£535 custom captain's chair
£110 Two pairs of granny curtain boiler suits
£400 Cotswold Company small sideboard (living room, blue)
£229 Cotswold Company tallboy (bedroom, ivory)
£799 Cotswold Company chester dove grey writing bureau (similar)
£849 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak dining table
£399 Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak storage bench
£2,396 2x Cotswold Company chester dresser
£1,529 Cotswold Company chester grand dresser
£299 Cotswold Company bookcase (porch)
£800 2x Cotswold Company small sideboards
£499 Cotswold Company chester wine console
£599 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard
£699 Cotswold Company chester large sideboard (wine rack version)
£800 2x Cotswold Company oakland rustic oak shoe storage bench
£730 Cotswold Company chester dove grey extra large dresser top
£300 suit she wore for the Diva photoshoot
£300 dyson hairdryer
£850 water rower
£400 John Lewis hammock
£400 John Lewis egg chair
£400 20x John Lewis clear plastic storage bins
£290 Baywood 33 drawer tea chest
£30 John Lewis Perspex cube pasta storage with pink lids
£20 full set of oversized unicorns/animal mugs from Asda
£300 sentient mirror
£360 2x nike trainers (exc. orange ones)
£120 24" TV for SB's PlayStation
£2500 Smeg (double American style)
£300 2x Viv westwood dress (assume sale)
£75 Sweaty Betty leggings
£170 Lumie alarm clock
£200 R&P bras (x 2 minimum)
£199 Airpods
£249 Airpods pro
£199 Apple Watch (assume series 3)
£250 Sleeper to Edinburgh last min on a Friday
£309 3 nights at Eden Locke, Edinburgh
£170 Last minute train home on a Monday morning
£700 Vets bills
£20 Sad Asda shop
£80 2x summit camping stove (shed)
£400 ooni pizza oven (freebie)
£60 3x “tiles” for locating lost keys/phones by internet magic
£12 2x dylon machine dye
£180 12x moleskin notebooks
£1000 unread books
£100 CUDDLY TOY (Hamleys)
Total: £34,476
(inc. Cotswold Company £11,027)


We've smashed the previous high score :m

Two Burberry Jackets (but I think they were pre-Patreon, correct?)
Shoes (not) left behind by stylist/left on after photo shoot? - I forget the brand these are
The new pair of boots she bought after wearing the taped together pair for a while on TV (despite having other pairs ...?)
Designer dog
304 Christmas tree decorations (many were 🔺 by clever fraus)
Botox
Fillers
Expensive haircuts
Artificial snow
many wigs
plastic flower headdress phase
“£5” denim cargo trousers from Primark
Multiple phones
Emin
SPITE SOFA
Le Creuset
furniture and set dressing for the shed outside that she was going to turn into a studio
lawnmower
bikes
tents
planting trough things
Ten (at least) outdoor chairs for her Mormon tabernacle Amish prayer circle fellowship things
The hen with the rubber eggs for nesting hens?
dusty plastics string of pearls plant
unread books
wallpaper backgrounds
Mary Poppins umbrella
"Many wigs" ... 🤣
 
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Guys, we know she has TONNES of high end tit. Back when it was all fields around here, we used to comment on how her poverty LARPing was constantly interspersed with, like, thot shots on a new Cotswold Co sideboard or Dyson hairdryers or 5 phones, 3 laptops and a super impressive looking desktop Mac type set up. That's why we're here! Because she's funding this lifestyle on people who don't even know what Downpipe is.
 
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From the last thread. This is about the SMEG fridge.

She upgraded the gifted one. She now has the £2,000 American style side by side four door fridge freezer. The new SMEG is so big it wouldn't fit in her kitchen and has to stay in the 3rd hall adjacent to the (not) spiral staircase.
Womp! There it is!
EFD420DA-99AA-44F2-A9F6-65FA77054EBC.jpeg
With the Cotswold wine rack wallpaper storage thingammybob opposite it. Unless she has more than one. Also another Cotswold piece through the door at the back.

🎵It’s like 10,000 pieces of heavy expensive furniture, when all you need is shower gel 🎵
A091463F-2C45-48FD-B65E-D19C80E263A7.gif
 
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From the last thread. This is about the SMEG fridge.



She upgraded the gifted one. She now has the £2,000 American style side by side four door fridge freezer. The new SMEG is so big it wouldn't fit in her kitchen and has to stay in the 3rd hall adjacent to the (not) spiral staircase.
How many staircases does an average bungalow have in Southend? It seems everything i thought i knew about bungalows (they don't have stairs) is wrong. Maybe it's a Northern thing. I bet bungalows in Cornwall are on 4 floors.
 
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I love how in the last thread so many fraus obtained @Marmalade Atkins like-superpowers for memory recall and triangulation.

It’s like at the end of Buffy when all the potentials got full slayer powers and strength.

 
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From the last thread. This is about the SMEG fridge.



She upgraded the gifted one. She now has the £2,000 American style side by side four door fridge freezer. The new SMEG is so big it wouldn't fit in her kitchen and has to stay in the 3rd hall adjacent to the (not) spiral staircase.
Wait four door fridge? Is there a pic of that because WOW. How the working class do live

Eta: @Valiofthedolls already came in clutch with the receipt
 
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So Delia on Peston ~is~ talking about kickeyball management a little bit, also that she doesn't understand politics but doesn't like politics and now Peston has asked her about her plan to reform politics. 🤯

Ooooo frugal food book being discussed.

She's out of her depth but holding her own.

Wonder if buggerlugs was on the short list for this one?
 
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