Jack Monroe #402 Which police squad will be tasked to investigate Jack being signed up to a mailing list?
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Rehabs will generally run some tests or ask you to have them upon admission. Anything from bloods and BP etc to a full physical work-up. If you've injected or engaged in sex work or casual unprotected sex you'll probably be counselled about BBV screening. If you can conceive, they will do a pregnancy test. They also encourage dental checks, sexual health services and smears etc if you have neglected that part of your health. Sometimes dietetics need to be involved. I had all of this done when I was detoxed and sent to rehab.
For all of Jack's THEY WON'T REST TIL I STOP BREATHING nonsense, we're probably more concerned about her welfare than most of the squigs. As much as she angers us, people are often offering her good, sensible advice (eg re Patreon) and take this kind of thing (the doxing tweets) seriously. The people I'd be more worried about if I were her are the flying monkeys who threaten her critics. If any of the scales drop from their eyes, they could get very nasty to her instead.
I bet it’ll disappear once she grunks here.
She has no f*cking shame - while I can laugh at her cooking attempts, fantasy stories about her health make me see red. We all have our own health problems, but we don't weaponise them for cash and likes. Despicable.
Ir's kind of similar to how she always knows everything about everything, been there done that, sort of thing. She's had a hundred jobs (despite not being that old and having done nothing but tweet for 10 years). Nobody can tell her *anything*. Does she think it'll make people look up to her?
I found this article about what happens on admission to an alcohol detox unit interesting when I read it yesterday.
Did she have anything to do with this? https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2022/sep/21/liz-truss-cost-of-living-poverty-gordon-brown
The thing that always makes me chuckle about the shiny black eye photo is she's squinting to try and make it look much more swollen than it actually is. The thing that gives her away is the unaffected eye is also squinting.
I just heard someone 
mistakenly say the Jose Pizarro cookbooks were "banging" Portuguese cookbooks (he's actually Spanish) and I had a repeat of Georgia Church Suppers on me.
mistakenly say the Jose Pizarro cookbooks were "banging" Portuguese cookbooks (he's actually Spanish) and I had a repeat of Georgia Church Suppers on me.
Yeah - I have to admit that I really thought she might come clean, even just a little bit.
I've had SS involved a few times. One of those times a family member reported because of my drinking. It was decided that I had enough support with my kid, that despite my drinking I managed to get him to school and fed and clothed (aka his basic needs met) and that was basically that. I wasn't quite at my worst in terms of my drinking at that time. And actually they did signpost me somewhere that I tried to get some help, for which I was grateful, but it didn't work as they were about controlled drinking and true alcoholics can't drink at all.
Actually the SS involvement after my kid had told nursery I'd hit him was more embarassing! (To be clear - I hadn't and they soon realised that)
Oooh I don't know, maybe?! Is JK a Frau?
I'm reading on an ereader so the online bits are really hard to follow!
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Constable Barlow: Guv, just finished my 12 hour shift on Tattle for the Monroe case, the ninnies have been at it again.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: ninnies?
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: that’s what they call themselves Guv. They’ve only gone and reported a troll to Twitter and got them removed.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: bloody hell, do they have no shame?
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: I know Guv, now we have them for getting rid of her trolls, warning Monroe about leaving her phone number visible and giving too much away about where she lives, blurring out her son’s face on photos when she didn’t do it herself, giving her advice on how to better manage her money and sort out the money she owes charities and the public - and even chatting with her when she wanted to join the group on one occasion.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv (twizzles moustache): great work Barlow, let’s throw the book at them sunshine, I want all 400 or 500 of them taken down for good. Monroe does so much good for all, we can’t have people on the internet laughing at things she continually posts any more. It’s just not on.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow:
Just got to follow up on the Joey Essex lead first, Guv. Someone’s called him as thick as a box of frogs on Twitter.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: (thumps fist on table) My God! Good work Barlow, let’s get to the bottom of that one quickly. The trauma these poor minor celebrities go through after posting their entire life on social media, thank goodness for CSI Celebrity Squad.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: it’s all in a day’s work, Guv.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: that it is Barlow, that it is….
To be continued….
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: ninnies?
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: that’s what they call themselves Guv. They’ve only gone and reported a troll to Twitter and got them removed.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: bloody hell, do they have no shame?
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: I know Guv, now we have them for getting rid of her trolls, warning Monroe about leaving her phone number visible and giving too much away about where she lives, blurring out her son’s face on photos when she didn’t do it herself, giving her advice on how to better manage her money and sort out the money she owes charities and the public - and even chatting with her when she wanted to join the group on one occasion.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv (twizzles moustache): great work Barlow, let’s throw the book at them sunshine, I want all 400 or 500 of them taken down for good. Monroe does so much good for all, we can’t have people on the internet laughing at things she continually posts any more. It’s just not on.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow:
Just got to follow up on the Joey Essex lead first, Guv. Someone’s called him as thick as a box of frogs on Twitter.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: (thumps fist on table) My God! Good work Barlow, let’s get to the bottom of that one quickly. The trauma these poor minor celebrities go through after posting their entire life on social media, thank goodness for CSI Celebrity Squad.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Const. Barlow: it’s all in a day’s work, Guv.
CSI Essex Celebrity Squad Guv: that it is Barlow, that it is….
To be continued….
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I know people like this in real life and they are all regular users of coke, abusing prescription stimulants/ADHD meds or both.
Ha. She’ll bleeping love that.
Very indignant squig here, fair play as she's suffered abuse so is identifying with Jack's "suffering", but the clapback is *chef's kiss*
Great article. I question if she even met him, and if she did, why no mention of the petition he is backing for the Emergency Budget to increase Universal Credit? With her platform it could reach a lot of people.
It’s amazing, seeing this all happen in real time - the crazy weekend, the two days of not posting and deleting the chaotic tweets, and then playing the victim to widespread adulation. It’s actually scary to see how easy it is for people like her to manipulate perceptions of them. If I hadnt been here, and hadn’t seen Molly’s blog, I’d probably see Jack’s Twitter today and be taken in.
I think that, as usual, she exaggerated. She did not have an interview with him in the way she implies, but would have been amongst a large group of people invited to put their 2pworth in. Can't think of the word. Then he didn't include her babblings in his final article so she won't mention it ever again.
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