Jack Monroe #398 A subscription to JackazonPrime+

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Welcome Frau to thread 398. Please do send recapos for anything I've missed.

Thanks to @WaffleKent for nominating the title courtesy of a squig's words.

Last thread, Jack decided to accuse her detractors of wanting her to STOP BREATHING (citation needed). Nigella broke her silence to give her support and Jack repeatedly retweeted the please send praiseos dead cat tweet from August multiple times for support.

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To reiterate, if anybody is stating anything of the sort, this is unacceptable and should be reported. Nobody should wish harm on Jack.

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Molly released the following statement in response.

On a more light hearted note, Frau's revisited Georgia Church Suppers after Jack claimed she mixed the state and country because she FAILED GEOGRAPHY. There's a delightfully horrifying recipe for a Ham Ball and the canal is on high alert for the Ham Ball x Pumble cross breed which may or may not be viciously crossing the Atlantic.

Click the pink button to read the wiki, please squig any non-jack or blue tick twitter handles and beware the Hamble.
 
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Welcome Frau to thread 398. Please do send recapos for anything I've missed.

Thanks to @WaffleKent for nominating the title courtesy of a squig's words.

Last thread, Jack decided to accuse her detractors of wanting her to STOP BREATHING (citation needed). Nigella broke her silence to give her support and Jack repeatedly retweeted the please send praiseos dead cat tweet from August multiple times for support.

View attachment 1587344

To reiterate, if anybody is stating anything of the sort, this is unacceptable and should be reported. Nobody should wish harm on Jack.

View attachment 1587345View attachment 1587346Molly released the following statement in response.

On a more light hearted note, Frau's revisited Georgia Church Suppers after Jack claimed she mixed the state and country because she FAILED GEOGRAPHY. There's a delightfully horrifying recipe for a Ham Ball and the canal is on high alert for the Ham Ball x Pumble cross breed which may or may not be viciously crossing the Atlantic.

Click the pink button to read the wiki, please squig any non-jack or blue tick twitter handles and beware the Hamble.
Thank you for all you do, working 100+ hours a week to make sure we got a new thread. Please do let us know how we can help you and let us send you money to support your tireless work.
 
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Great recap, thank(space)you. The Georgia Church Suppers incident is one of my absolute favourites within the rich bootstrapverse lore. It gives me a warm glow. Might go and record a song in the shower to prove how HAPPY it makes me.
 
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Great recap, thank(space)you. The Georgia Church Suppers incident is one of my absolute favourites within the rich bootstrapverse lore. It gives me a warm glow. Might go and record a song in the shower to prove how HAPPY it makes me.
Please can you ensure the song contains the word BOULEVARD.
 
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Someone: “oh Jack ffs shut up”
Jack: “THEY WANT ME TO STOP TALKING FOREVER! ARREST THEM!”

Great recap, thank(space)you. The Georgia Church Suppers incident is one of my absolute favourites within the rich bootstrapverse lore. It gives me a warm glow. Might go and record a song in the shower to prove how HAPPY it makes me.
Please do Midnight Train to Georgia 🤍 whenever I’m sad and hear that song it makes me giggle
 
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Having now seen the bookshelves, I fully believe she has 9 shelves of cookbooks. Easily done when you can only fit 8 books on a shelf.
 
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This morning, I was mindlessly scrolling through TikTok and trying to swerve the barrage of videos about that weird blond man when, what’s that? Somebody reviewing a Jack Monroe recipe? Grated Courgette Pancake to be exact, already my stomach is churning at the thought BUT the TT-er has mentioned she was trying to save money so, fingers crossed, she’s found a lovely cheap meal. Fraus, it was a no from her 😂. I definitely did both a 🦉 and a 🍾

(not sure if I can share the video as the lovely creator only has 800-ish followers?) and would have absolutely no idea how to squig a video?
 
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I don’t think I can cope with a pumble and a haunted doll with dead eyes. Send supportos.
 
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Honorable mention to the Frau who followed the baked bean cooking instructions for "mumma Jack's best EVER chili" - rinse, boil for ten minutes then simmer, for no reason at all except to make something with the texture of wallpaper paste :sick: hope you're doing ok pal, nobody needed to see that x
 
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I don’t think I can cope with a pumble and a haunted doll with dead eyes. Send supportos.
Hamble is the pumbles real mum and she gave it to Jack for safekeeping whilst she retreated to a gingerbread cabin in the woods to hatch more pumbles and lure unsuspecting fairytale children into her trap. That bloody doll is evil and it's no surprise to learn Hamble is Jack's best and only friend.
 
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I think the pumble is Hambles afterbirth following her giving birth to the shark eyed one.

Send exorcistios 😢
 
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I'm wondering if we should take a day off as begged, poor Jack has been spinning so hard she keeps meeting herself coming back. I suggest tomorrow (Statey Funes). She can have a break from being FORCED to tweet ridiculous shite to own us, and focus instead on mourning her Dad's reputation Our Lizzie. While we talk about cats and donkeys. (Obviously the litter squad will be on standby for discarded receipts)
 
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So, are we going to be doing “a thing” for thread 400? We should be gently softly marking such an occasion don’t you think?
 
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Pink is suspected sock. It's either weird fans or Jack herself trying to bait people into wishing harm on her.

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This morning, I was mindlessly scrolling through TikTok and trying to swerve the barrage of videos about that weird blond man when, what’s that? Somebody reviewing a Jack Monroe recipe? Grated Courgette Pancake to be exact, already my stomach is churning at the thought BUT the TT-er has mentioned she was trying to save money so, fingers crossed, she’s found a lovely cheap meal. Fraus, it was a no from her 😂. I definitely did both a 🦉 and a 🍾

(not sure if I can share the video as the lovely creator only has 800-ish followers?) and would have absolutely no idea how to squig a video?
Grated courgette pancake. This is better than stale bread crusts in fennel, beans rinsed and obliterated and sardines and sultanas on cold pasta. I think someone suggested a cook off and that is a very good idea.
 
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Those little tins of mackerel and sardines in oil and sauce are lush. You just open the tin slightly and put it in the oven for bit, and then its delicious on its own with a fork. Can I have a book deal now?
 
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Ok, but the question remains, how on earth do you get half a GCSE? Do they not only come in whole numbers?
 
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