Jack Monroe #198 Marcus! Marcus! Marcus!

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Man, I must have missed the floofle. How the duck does she think people won't notice???
She deletes everything so the average twitter user generally doesn’t notice. It’s why she hates us because we have the receipts thanks to the hard work of @Silver Linings et al!

Floofle started Here post #509 SB drew a “Floofle”. Silly robot man got involved and drew it as a robot thingy.

It was then discovered the drawing was from a design on her PJs Here post #569
 
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Hahaha I can't. This is an excerpt from Jack's meatball recipe on her site, all about making them with Marcus that day:

"And then I had to keep it a MASSIVE SECRET which god help me, has almost burst me with anticipation a few times over the past few weeks, especially when people have endlessly been asking on Twitter if we are going to be doing anything together. Serene emojis and poker faces all round."

Jack hun...the 'people on Twitter' meant are you doing anything together to work on ENDING CHILD FOOD POVERTY! Not you bouncing around like a blue arsed fly like you've won a competition to meet him.
"bouncing around like a blue arsed fly" 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

I haven't heard that in years. My mum thought it was common to say arse, so used to say "blue bottomed fly". It creased me up.
 
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She deletes everything so the average twitter user generally doesn’t notice. It’s why she hates us because we have the receipts thanks to the hard work of @Silver Linings et al!

Floofle started Here post #509 SB drew a “Floofle”. Silly robot man got involved and drew it as a robot thingy.

It was then discovered the drawing was from a design on her PJs Here post #569
Thank(space)you I am always so relieved to discover my memory actually works 😊
 
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Is a true story! She thought she was being punished!!!!
I can’t say I blame her - if I was a served a blended bag of salad/compost for my tea I’d be wondering what sin I’d committed.
 
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She deletes everything so the average twitter user generally doesn’t notice. It’s why she hates us because we have the receipts thanks to the hard work of @Silver Linings et al!

Floofle started Here post #509 SB drew a “Floofle”. Silly robot man got involved and drew it as a robot thingy.

It was then discovered the drawing was from a design on her PJs Here post #569
The whole fawning SB story that obviously didn’t happen “you’re tough but you like cute things mamapapa, sorry for asking for jam that time you fed me weetabix made from plughole hair, I made you this”
 
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if anyone wants some inspo to find their own favourite abandoned project (also I've not posted it in a while and we've got some newbies) may I suggest..


£15 a week lunches
£20 shops as a whole
9 half-written manuscripts
35 recipes from a £20 shop, pick your fave
2000 words for print glossy ✅ GQ awards
adding to twitter thread of plants as they bloom
advent calendar
aged chicken thigh bone stock
base system going in next book
BBC show ✅ guest on dr rupy's iplayer show
big press photo shoots
black bean brownies recipe
BLM video monetization donation
blog post excited about for ages
book on culinary history
book signing in Belfast
books for slow cooker appeal
books for the rural coffee caravan
Brand New System for desk - wallpaper ✅
bright blue think tank updates
Camp Kitchen from the shed
chestnut fudge thing
chicken livers
cinnamon granola recipe
coffee scrub
column for the Breakdown
comic filter security
Conditions of Bungalow Bubbling lessons
curating regular book recommendations
David Walliams book reviews
dauphinoise pie
denim shirt embroidery commissions
depressipes
detailed blog on nutrition
devilled eggs recipe - completed it, mate ✅
drawing nigella's garden
ethical on a budget
explain daily usage of pythagoras theorem
festive pop tarts
festive vegan loaf
filing accounts
flannel blog
food truck of joy
gailymail
great resources by trans + non binary writers
greek cook book
half-written budget xmas recipes
handing over her platform to poc
healthy on a bootstrap
helping disability and mental health writers
history of York road market
homemade hand sanitiser
homemade cleaning items
huge depop or Ebay sale
hybrid cassoulet
jackfruit version of something
James Bond conspiracy theory
Klingon gagh recipe
knit blanket
kolokythokeftedes recipe
kombucha whisky
lever arch files of fan mail
life hacks book
links to small businesses
list of slow cooker recipes
lockdown larder 2.0 resumption threatened
lockdown list of services
maple syrup story
militant boiled eggs
mince pie doughnuts
mole
mushroom drying ✅ completed 2018
New Thing
newspaper campaign ✅ the bleeping express
onion chopping song
ouchy mouth recipes
patreon update
pistachio milk
pointing out real plants
postcards, postcards, postcards
poverty memoir
puttanesca soup
radish recipes
recipe roundup on Instagram
recipes for small people
red ephemera soup recipe
repotting spider plants from a friend
rooting out Amazon from website

running around in heels with a Tall Man ✅ GQ awards 2020. no evidence of running or dancing, but Marcus is tall. she didn't even personally hand him the award.

sausage and kale slop
Secret Ingredient - possibly banana skin
secret stock ingredient ✅ potato water
sending maple syrup tin to fan
setting her teenage musings to music
sexy kitchen makeover reason
shopping trolley
sideboard photos reason
sleep hygiene routine
slow cooker bubble bath
slow cooker xmas dinner - before xmas 2021
some kind of timetable for SB in lockdown
super secret shopping trip hack
supper nanny
support cabal for bullied media types
sweet and sour soup
sweet potato caramel
thrifty shades of beige
Thursday thunder clap
tin juice cordial recipe
tomato soup water content - done ✅
transcribing and blogging non binary talk
translation of a Greek Cypriot cookbook
unorthodox cheese sauce - done ✅
unorthodox courgette squishing
Up To Something
uses for juice from del monte tins
various cornflakes chicken recipes
vegan char sui buns
vegan cheese list
vegan crackling
vegan diabetic creme egg (maybe)
vegan haggis
vegan pastitsio in collab with veganuary Linda ✅
vegan paella with artichokes
vegan pie glaze
vegan version of upside down pineapple chicken
visit Poland
weekly routine

/SPOILER]

and feel free to add any to the wiki that aren't there as I still can't ❤
Aaand a paaartriidge in a peeeaaar treeee 🎶 🤣🤣 Fab new thread, cabal - dipping in briefly as working all the hours at the moment. Hope you’re all grand!
 
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Let us not forget the ultimate fate of flooflebot. If you can't use Pythagoras on it, it's not a proper bot. It is a false prophet come to seduce you and divert you from the righteous path of the Acute Angle. Beware the curved line for it is the geometrical manifestation of THAT MAN himself who will tempt you with his solid food away from the low and slow Holy Slop. Praise beans.

deadly sitrus calad.gif
 
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Praise beans in sauce and the One True Bot whose head is boxy and full of angles, as they used to say on Line of Duty
 
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...have we started a cult?
Yes the cult of Monroe. All followers must wear a denim shirt and boy cap or blazer with pens in the pocket.
All will drink from the bowl of salad bag pesto and partake of the lemon drizzle brick during ceremonies
Under her eye
 
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Yes the cult of Monroe. All followers must wear a denim shirt and boy cap or blazer with pens in the pocket.
All will drink from the bowl of salad bag pesto and partake of the lemon drizzle brick during ceremonies
Under her eye
Alan! Cue the spooky eye picture
 
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Let us not forget the ultimate fate of flooflebot. If you can't use Pythagoras on it, it's not a proper bot. It is a false prophet come to seduce you and divert you from the righteous path of the Acute Angle. Beware the curved line for it is the geometrical manifestation of THAT MAN himself who will tempt you with his solid food away from the low and slow Holy Slop. Praise beans.

View attachment 663201
Not going to pretend I understand exactly what’s going on, but you had me at Pythagoras and I’m fully invested in this.

 
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We shall gather in the nation's gardens on all the spare chairs from the garden sheds. Pocahontas will read from one of the divine (read vile) sacred texts of our sainted Monroe's literary back catalogue. Incense made from plughole hair shall be burned. The sacred scrolls aka the info the ico would be concerned about, shall be stored only in the blessed Cotswolds sideboards. Blessed be the (rinsed) beans
 
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