Jack Monroe #193 Mama, pass the UNICEF statistics and the Hansards!

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I’m loving that most of the reply tweets say “yeah I’ve been doing this for years” Kinda shits on your life changing slovenly kitchen tip eh Jack? 🤣🤣🤣
 
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You'll need a strong right arm. Do you know any unattached males?


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Finally, we have a use for Stuart!

ETA: for newer readers, Stuart was a squiggle who got way too creepy, went back to find his tweets but looks like his account was thankfully suspended in the end. (Also thread #10 is such a funny thread 😂 simpler times )
 
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She's using my fav term for her eyes 'heebie jeebies' duck off Jack, your eyes are heebie jeebies material, not kidney bean water!!!
Your use of it makes so much more sense Orphy B. I feel your pain, she also used “bonkers” which I say all the time, most recently here, just yesterday 😭
 
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And there we have it. That’ll do. Food that’s been cooked to death and offers none of its original flavours, textures and quite possibly nutritional value. Obviously is now brown. Bravo 👏 Jack you did it again.
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That slop is bleeping rancid and that spoon stuck in it looks so grim I think it's turned up to ask about the reaping. The viscous bubbles coupled with the alarmingly pink slimy ham chunks and dusty topping are making me feel quite ill.

To confirm: the liquid from a tin of kidney beans is totally fine. It's only when cooking beans from dried that you need to worry about soaking them properly, boiling them rapidly and then cooking them long enough to make them safe. I would however still not recommend chucking the contents of a tin of beans straight into something you're cooking as I've had one tin of beans with dead flies in and one with an enormous chunk of rust. Both would still be more appealing than anything Jack has ever cooked.
 
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Wut??
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no, no Jack, something’s not right here!
Surely for years you have advised that you put your veg in cold oil before flailing any iota of flavour out of it? Where have you suddenly learned to “caramelise” veg and worry about losing its sweetness?!?!

I’m not sure this tweeter is really Jack — no hammock, revealing technique/skills … or maybe she spent the last 5 weeks doing an intense course at Leith’s instead of vague “treatment” somewhere ?!??

and in total confession I made soup today (for my elderly father, not my choice!), chopped veg from a bag, 20 minutes, I could only bear to be in the kitchen for approx 2 mins during that whole time #wouldhavepreferredasalad
 
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Is this the most horrifying slop of 2021 so far? I'm still haunted by mussels and pears but that's so yesterday
 
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