Mrs Malaprop Jack is another favourite. An avaricious reader...doesn't she mean voracious?While Jack is off saving the children, can I interest you in what may be her worst piece of prose ever? It's her tribute to Nigella, written in Nigella style.
How To Eat, by Nigella Lawson
‘Bootlegged’ is a new series on Cooking On A Bootstrap, taking new or favourite cookbooks and recipes, and making them cheap and simple. First in the series, Jack talks about the impact…cookingonabootstrap.com
TRIGGER WARNING: it contains a direct reference to her fingernails: I carefully underscored words with an absent-minded fingernail (imagine the state of the book after that). Also her seduction technique is mentioned. Tread carefully...
"I read it greedily then humped it like a starved randy plagiarising Jack Russell, before gnawing the pages and gently, carefully cooking them low and slow then clawing and howling at the floor"