Jack Monroe #127 No-spend year

[BlendedSlop]

Lmao she's deleted the one about meeting her dad on purpose (cos it's breaking the law you twit). Was likely queuing up outside Asda this morning gleefully hoping she'd find a bunch of panic buyers stripping the shelves of beans so she could reprimand people on twitter (whilst simultaneously sowing panic and directing people to Lockdown Larder 3). She's a disgrace.

And what's this bleeping white as mayo heart she's sticking onto all her tweets? An emoji isn't a personality Jack

Exactly this. She probably had her phone camera(s) at the ready for the first glimpse of an empty shelf.

I'm lucky to live near a 24 hour ASDA ( ) and on the rare occasion I go shopping it's like a covert operation. Go at a quiet time, be in and out of there as quickly as I can, and avoid people as much as possible. Not stand around chatting tit while dozens of strangers potentially pass on their germs (or I pass on mine!).

I understand missing family - I really, really do - but you don't get to lecture people on Twitter about the importance of adhering to the rules while stretching and even outright breaking them yourself at every opportunity (then telling everyone about it, obvs).

 

[TriviaNewtonJohn]

B-but only JM does free recipes with stuff you might have in during lockdown?!?

 

[Incywincy]

Spoiler: Best sausage gif

But...

(Eta forgot to thank Alan! Sorry!)

If she's there with Jack now, she can't leave, can she, until lockdown's finished? You're stuck where you are? No wonder Jack's acting so high, she's got Louisa there like James Caan in Misery.

It's not actually law until early hours of Wednesday (tonight) so she can still make a run for it

 

[NP]

Let’s not forget that the only reason Lockdown Larder was started was because she was bitter about THAT MAN getting the C4 show. She timed the first run of Lockdown Larder at the same time as his show and once smugly tweeted something along the lines of, “That’s 80 recipes done in an hour. How did the other one do?” (screenshots are somewhere on here). Letdown Larder has only ever been to serve herself and her ego.

Screenshot added:

 

[Sausage Surprise !]

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Yes !!

 

[LavaFlake]

Let’s not forget that the only reason Lockdown Larder was started was because she was bitter about THAT MAN getting the C4 show. She timed the first run of Lockdown Larder at the same time as his show and once smugly tweeted something along the lines of, “That’s 80 recipes done in an hour. How did the other one do?” (screenshots are somewhere on here). Letdown Larder has only ever been to serve herself and her ego.

Screenshot added:
View attachment 372778

God she's pathetic. I remember her sharing smug screenshots of her flying monkeys @ing Jamie Oliver and Channel Four and saying nasty stuff on her IG stories. Wish I'd screenshot but it was my pre Tattle days.

 

[Fruitjack]

I think my favourite thing about this site is when we use the triangle emoji about something that anyone could do. It absolutely always makes me chuckle, even when I'm trying to work out whether 350 students have to come in for an exam tomorrow *triangle emoji*

 

[Scotty1976]

But...

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(Eta forgot to thank Alan! Sorry!)



It's not actually law until early hours of Wednesday (tonight) so she can still make a run for it

Straight out (of here) Compton .

 

[Veronicaaa]

Let’s not forget that the only reason Lockdown Larder was started was because she was bitter about THAT MAN getting the C4 show. She timed the first run of Lockdown Larder at the same time as his show and once smugly tweeted something along the lines of, “That’s 80 recipes done in an hour. How did the other one do?” (screenshots are somewhere on here). Letdown Larder has only ever been to serve herself and her ego.

Screenshot added:
View attachment 372778

I don't know why, but the pic of her here gives me the heebie jeebies, real demonic (TM @heretoreaditall2019) energy coming from it.

 

[missbct]

Sup cabal - used to be a regular around the time Jack graced us with her presence. Then real life got in the way!

QQ - is Jack back with Louisa?

 

[Veronicaaa]

Sup cabal - used to be a regular around the time Jack graced us with her presence. Then real life got in the way!

QQ - is Jack back with Louisa?

No, they bubbled together for some unknown reason and then Louisa got COVID.

 

[missbct]

No, they bubbled together for some unknown reason and then Louisa got COVID.

Ah thanks, Inexplicable!

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[NomDeGuerre]

Can we create some kind of lockdown larder bingo?

For example, have a point when someone who is clearly a very proficient home cook is just showing off by asking what they can do with langoustine, preserved lemons, half a block of pecorino and some squid ink pasta.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[MooBelle]

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Cook rice.
Slice ham.
Put all in bowl with raita.

duck sake. How are these people functioning in real life?

 

[NP]

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She’s so excited to feel relevant again.

(she’s not)

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Veronicaaa]

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I'm googling thinking

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Can we create some kind of lockdown larder bingo?

For example, have a point when someone who is clearly a very proficient home cook is just showing off by asking what they can do with langoustine, preserved lemons, half a block of pecorino and some squid ink pasta.

And then they would be told to put the Langoustine into a blender with some curry powder and simmer it for three days in a bucket with a tin of Del Monte peaches and some potato peelings, the preserved lemons should be added to a sweet rice pudding with curry powder and half a Curly Wurly, the block of Pecorino should be boiled with a used teabag and half a stale mince pie, then topped with a bag of mixed botulism and the pasta should be poached in bleach to get the colour out before adding to tinned pears. With some curry powder to taste, naturally.