Influencer Christmas Decs - the only roast that matters this festive season

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I can't concentrate on the tree for the pile of pube-shavings on the carpet
What the duck was that “tree”?!!!
Is that how they do them now, by starting with those monstrosities they put on top?
What happened to the tradition of someone (usually a child) placing the star or angel on top as the last thing to go on it, the finishing touch?
Does no one do this any more?
 
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I will see myself out after this. But I had 4 Christmas trees up last year in a 2 bed flat before we moved here.
The main one 🥲 in the front room. And one in the kids room (both Autistic and was obsessed with fairy lights and “trees” at the time) and one in my room as they used to sleep in my bed half the time and needed to look at it before sleep 🤦🏽‍♀️. And a small one in the kitchen that was given to me. My husband nearly ran away because of the brightness of the house. Every room he went in all I heard was “ these bleeping trees mate” 😂. This year he’s said I can put up the normal one in the front room and the kids are allowed their trees in their own bedrooms but no kitchen ones, or surprise ones I tried to sneak out for the hallway. I just love Christmas to be honest 🤦🏽‍♀️
 
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I will see myself out after this. But I had 4 Christmas trees up last year in a 2 bed flat before we moved here.
The main one 🥲 in the front room. And one in the kids room (both Autistic and was obsessed with fairy lights and “trees” at the time) and one in my room as they used to sleep in my bed half the time and needed to look at it before sleep 🤦🏽‍♀️. And a small one in the kitchen that was given to me. My husband nearly ran away because of the brightness of the house. Every room he went in all I heard was “ these bleeping trees mate” 😂. This year he’s said I can put up the normal one in the front room and the kids are allowed their trees in their own bedrooms but no kitchen ones, or surprise ones I tried to sneak out for the hallway. I just love Christmas to be honest 🤦🏽‍♀️
Stay put @BigBrenda 😁 It's all in good fun. And in solidarity, I will tell you that this Halloween (I'm much more Halloween than Christmas) I opened my door to a set of young teen zombies and one looked at me all earnest and said "I think you may have over decorated". He may have had a point but my reply was "Everyone needs a hobby" and I stand by that. ;)
 
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Stay put @BigBrenda 😁 It's all in good fun. And in solidarity, I will tell you that this Halloween (I'm much more Halloween than Christmas) I opened my door to a set of young teen zombies and one looked at me all earnest and said "I think you may have over decorated". He may have had a point but my reply was "Everyone needs a hobby" and I stand by that. ;)
Love this 💙. We had a child knock who was wearing an actual pumpkin on his head carved out. The kids was over the moon it was our first year getting trick or treaters.
 
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None of these trees have actually looked like trees? it’s just baubles etc stacked into a 3D triangle shape (can’t remember the proper name). I can’t see an actual “tree”
 
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Whatever happened to good old baubles and lights? And tinsel too if you're that way inclined - I know not everyone is a fan.
Why do all these trees look like someone has thrown the contents of B&M Christmas section at them and hoped for the best? Why is there so much shite sticking out at all angles? Why so many candy canes? Why do they insist on scraping up a dead pheasant from the side of the road, plucking the feathers and poking then out the top of the tree? WHYYYY
 
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