How to make friends in your 30s

[Nosey Moo]

I’ve never had anyone I can call a best friend, I have the typical acquaintances and the old school friends on the socials. But I have literally no one I can go out with (coffee, shopping, etc) vent to about stupid boys the typical mate stuff.
I feel so alone. I see my mum as a best friend and am very close with her but I can’t tell her some stuff you’d tell a friend. Is there like dating apps but for friends? TIA

 

[Be creative]

I’m the same as you. Well, I do have one best friend, known her since we were kids. But she’s married and likely going to be starting a family soon so we are gonna be at different stages as I’m a single Pringle still (at 31 ). My mum is my ultimate best friend. I spend a lot of time with her. I find it hard to make new friends. I think there is a friends option on tinder, and probably some other dating apps. Where abouts are you based? I’m in Scotland

 

[Countrybumpkingirl]

I moved house to a completely new area this year (single, knew nobody etc) and I joined bumble bff and made some really amazing friends through that. I also play a couple of sports so met people through that too. My advice is you have to be open to doing anything and not be afraid. I went completely out of my comfort zone and can confirm it pays off!

 

[Nosey Moo]

I’m the same as you. Well, I do have one best friend, known her since we were kids. But she’s married and likely going to be starting a family soon so we are gonna be at different stages as I’m a single Pringle still (at 31 ). My mum is my ultimate best friend. I spend a lot of time with her. I find it hard to make new friends. I think there is a friends option on tinder, and probably some other dating apps. Where abouts are you based? I’m in Scotland

So do I. I always feel like I’m annoying so I have never kept friendships for long I’m Cardiff area.

 

[Sosig]

I’m in my late 20s and still trying to work out how to make friends I don’t have much of a family but I’ve got a very close friend I can tell anything to, a drinking buddy who I’ve known for years and a problematic friend who isn’t loyal. I always take the piss and say “me and my 1 mate” but it’s actually true. I think it’s because I was in a girl friendship group in school and it was always so bitchy and toxic I chose to stand out instead as the few friends I have are from different groups/points in life.

 

[JoeBloggs]

I could have written that OP, I went to an all girls school and in my last year my friendship group turned on me. I went to uni made some good friends but they all live quite far away, I have one really close friend but she’s about 100 miles away.

I also have one friend who I’ve know since I was a baby, but we are very different and don’t really socialise together expect for family type things.

I met a friend on Facebook when I moved areas but she’s met someone and move away.
I also feel I’m the issue

I spent a lot of time with my mum and we even go away on girls holidays! I’d love to meet some friends but the idea of an app seems odd. I go to the gym but haven’t met anyone there either!

 

[Nosey Moo]

I’ve checked out bumble BFF as suggested but I feel a bit embarrassed cos a lot have their job stated etc. What can I put “ out of work due to suffering Badly with depression & anxiety” god I’m such a car crash

 

[CynicalV]

I’ve checked out bumble BFF as suggested but I feel a bit embarrassed cos a lot have their job stated etc. What can I put “ out of work due to suffering Badly with depression & anxiety” god I’m such a car crash

Don't worry I'm in the exact same position, not long made it and I left that field blank and find most people didn't bother mentioning it if you've got plenty of other things on your profile to start conversations about, like the hobbies and activities you like or want to try. That's what most people are interested in I feel, as they probably don't want to chat about their jobs, but make connections and share interests. If anyone has asked I've simply said I'm taking some time out, sometimes said what sort of thing I'd like to go into potentially in the future, but sometimes not. There's always others in the same boat too! I hope you have some luck with it

 

[HitchhikingGhost]

I could have written this thread, I feel exactly the same. I've used Bumble BFF and met up with one girl on it. I was more nervous than meeting up with a guy for an online date lol.

I'm about to move towns so I will be trying it again

 

[Nosey Moo]

I could have written this thread, I feel exactly the same. I've used Bumble BFF and met up with one girl on it. I was more nervous than meeting up with a guy for an online date lol.

I'm about to move towns so I will be trying it again

How did the meet up work out? Did you make a good friend or did it just become Facebook friends?

 

[bluebell22]

I have a group of friends that I still see from school but I’m not really close with any of them, we don’t share the same interests at all and only socialise with them once every few months and it’s mostly only the odd night out. My husband is my best friend but haven’t really got any girl mates that I’m close to.

 

[under the ivy]

I have 1 good friend from uni but she lives in Scotland so rarely get to see her. I’ve never had a big friendship group even at school and I’m very wary of girls even now, due to being bullied by a group of them at school. I started a PhD in January and was hoping to make friends/meet new people then, but I’ve been working from home since March due to Covid, so that hasn’t gone to plan I’m also going through a break-up so I’d love a group of girl mates to help with that, Sex and the City style!

 

[Nosey Moo]

I have 1 good friend from uni but she lives in Scotland so rarely get to see her. I’ve never had a big friendship group even at school and I’m very wary of girls even now, due to being bullied by a group of them at school. I started a PhD in January and was hoping to make friends/meet new people then, but I’ve been working from home since March due to Covid, so that hasn’t gone to plan I’m also going through a break-up so I’d love a group of girl mates to help with that, Sex and the City style!

That’s what I want damn sex and the city giving friendship hopes

 

[HitchhikingGhost]

How did the meet up work out? Did you make a good friend or did it just become Facebook friends?

Yeah really well, we did a lot together, out for dinner, cinema, escape rooms, went to some local events over the last year or so. Me moving will make it harder to meet up but we text regularly still. I wouldn't say we are best friends but was good to find someone to hang out with

 

[Lollipop2123]

I feel exactly the same. Not helped by the fact that I have a toddler who takes up a lot of my time and I have low self esteem. I love LOVE a best friend or a close group of mates x

 

[Pixipoppy]

I’ve checked out bumble BFF as suggested but I feel a bit embarrassed cos a lot have their job stated etc. What can I put “ out of work due to suffering Badly with depression & anxiety” god I’m such a car crash

Bumble BFF is great, I’ve met a couple girls through there and so have others I know - it’s hard to go from the initial stage of chatting with someone to actually meeting up but it’s kind of the same as when you’re dating - you just have to put yourself out there. Sometimes you just need to meet one person, then they introduce you do someone and so on... it sort of spirals from there. Also take solace in the fact that anyone on that sort of app actively wants to make friends, so no one is going to judge your circumstances!

 

[Nosey Moo]

I feel exactly the same. Not helped by the fact that I have a toddler who takes up a lot of my time and I have low self esteem. I love LOVE a best friend or a close group of mates x

My boy is 8 but I struggle with the school mums. I feel ya with the low self esteem. It’s such a struggle to be a grown up at times isn’t it :/

 

[Be creative]

We should organise a big meet one night somewhere where we all meet up and have a night out

 

[Meh]

I love this thread.
I feel like I could have written it myself. I have gradually fallen away from my group of friends and there was blame and fault on both sides. Have my sister whom I am close with and my
Boyfriend but I do feel a bit lonely. Would be nice to have one or two extra girls to catch up with and get lunch with etc. I’m in Scotland and I may give the bumble BFF thing a try.

 

[OutrageouslyScarlet]

I’ve actually thought a few times about making a thread for people in similar areas on here as there’s a lot of like mindedness. I just thought people may want to stay completely anonymous so didn’t bother.