How do I tell my friend that her house is disgusting?

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You are a good friend but everybody has limits! If she can't agree to meet you outside her home, even a short distance, then you need to tell her that her house makes you feel uncomfortable. Why should you sacrifice your anxiety because of hers?
Your sanity is just as important as hers. If you can't be honest, you will end up hating her.
Ask yourself if the friendship is worth saving? If yes, be honest with her. If not, time to let go and set yourself free of endless excuses.
 
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I totally get where you’re coming from. My house is a mess. I’ve only just got it sorted as I’m a single mum and only just got time away from my child to do a deep clean. One of my family members came round unexpectedly and said my house was disgusting and it really hurt me and still does. On the other hand my Mum has a really dirty house and I hate to even eat drink or use the toilet there. I think the best thing to do would be to meet elsewhere (this is what I do with my mum) does ur friend have a garden u can sit in? Or just say to her do u need help with anything in the house I have a free day etc.. just to hint to her and may make her realise there are things that need doing. She may be comfortable living like that, some people grow up in dirty homes and that’s the norm
 
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