this is how my mindset works
some people know what theyāve done wrong just like acting like they donāt .
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some people know what theyāve done wrong just like acting like they donāt .
They always act so oblivious as well. I find people ALWAYS try come back around and I'm just not interested and they seethe. Lost me when you crossed me nobhead.this is how my mindset works
I definitely agree with poster above about blocking people on socialsā¦ being ignored by someone you tried to reach out to and then seeing all their posts and being lovely to everyone besides you. Itās so hurtful. Social media so fake.
@Barbie2020 I bet you anything, that ex friend you blocked who was ignoring you, noticed within the first hour you blocked her. And was really upset about it! Tough tit is all I say! =D I totally agree with your approach
@Barbie2020 I bet you anything, that ex friend you blocked who was ignoring you, noticed within the first hour you blocked her. And was really upset about it! Tough tit is all I say! =D I totally agree with your approach
Not sure if this thread is active but thought Iād give it a go 
My best friend and I met around 7 years ago at a job. She was part time with a 1 year ago and we instantly clicked. I attended her wedding 6 months later and weāve basically been inseparable since. The issue (and I hope this doesnāt sound awful, so bear with me) is that sheās an elevenerife person, but with bad things. Your sad? Sheās depressed. Your tired? Sheās exhausted and can barely keep her eyes open.
She has two kids and has just qualified as a paramedic and sometimes acts as though she is the only person in the world who can be tired and has it worse than anyone. Lots of moaning on FB. I work a high demand job, and Iām renovating a house so I am naturally stressed but she never asks if Iām ok, or checks in. In the last 6 months I have to constantly reach out to see when sheās free, ask if sheās ok, and I never get anything back. Sheāll end with āyou?ā And I answer and a lot of time I just donāt get a reply. It really hurts too when I see her interacting with people on FB but not replying to a text.
I feel pathetic typing this at 29 but itās exhausting to keep the friendship alive when she doesnāt seem to give anything back. I donāt expect nor want constant chats or seeing each other because I understand sheās busy, but a simple āhey how are you?ā Would make a difference but itās non existent. Idk what to do.
My best friend and I met around 7 years ago at a job. She was part time with a 1 year ago and we instantly clicked. I attended her wedding 6 months later and weāve basically been inseparable since. The issue (and I hope this doesnāt sound awful, so bear with me) is that sheās an elevenerife person, but with bad things. Your sad? Sheās depressed. Your tired? Sheās exhausted and can barely keep her eyes open.
She has two kids and has just qualified as a paramedic and sometimes acts as though she is the only person in the world who can be tired and has it worse than anyone. Lots of moaning on FB. I work a high demand job, and Iām renovating a house so I am naturally stressed but she never asks if Iām ok, or checks in. In the last 6 months I have to constantly reach out to see when sheās free, ask if sheās ok, and I never get anything back. Sheāll end with āyou?ā And I answer and a lot of time I just donāt get a reply. It really hurts too when I see her interacting with people on FB but not replying to a text.
I feel pathetic typing this at 29 but itās exhausting to keep the friendship alive when she doesnāt seem to give anything back. I donāt expect nor want constant chats or seeing each other because I understand sheās busy, but a simple āhey how are you?ā Would make a difference but itās non existent. Idk what to do.
Not sure if this thread is active but thought Iād give it a go
My best friend and I met around 7 years ago at a job. She was part time with a 1 year ago and we instantly clicked. I attended her wedding 6 months later and weāve basically been inseparable since. The issue (and I hope this doesnāt sound awful, so bear with me) is that sheās an elevenerife person, but with bad things. Your sad? Sheās depressed. Your tired? Sheās exhausted and can barely keep her eyes open.
She has two kids and has just qualified as a paramedic and sometimes acts as though she is the only person in the world who can be tired and has it worse than anyone. Lots of moaning on FB. I work a high demand job, and Iām renovating a house so I am naturally stressed but she never asks if Iām ok, or checks in. In the last 6 months I have to constantly reach out to see when sheās free, ask if sheās ok, and I never get anything back. Sheāll end with āyou?ā And I answer and a lot of time I just donāt get a reply. It really hurts too when I see her interacting with people on FB but not replying to a text.
I feel pathetic typing this at 29 but itās exhausting to keep the friendship alive when she doesnāt seem to give anything back. I donāt expect nor want constant chats or seeing each other because I understand sheās busy, but a simple āhey how are you?ā Would make a difference but itās non existent. Idk what to do.
Just block and move on. If she doesn't make time for you anyways what's the difference? Least you won't have her there in your orbit making you feel shite.
I had a similar situation. I wouldnāt block her, but Iāll stop initiating the text messages and reaching out and see what happensā¦ let her contact you first. She might not, and thereās your answerNot sure if this thread is active but thought Iād give it a go
My best friend and I met around 7 years ago at a job. She was part time with a 1 year ago and we instantly clicked. I attended her wedding 6 months later and weāve basically been inseparable since. The issue (and I hope this doesnāt sound awful, so bear with me) is that sheās an elevenerife person, but with bad things. Your sad? Sheās depressed. Your tired? Sheās exhausted and can barely keep her eyes open.
She has two kids and has just qualified as a paramedic and sometimes acts as though she is the only person in the world who can be tired and has it worse than anyone. Lots of moaning on FB. I work a high demand job, and Iām renovating a house so I am naturally stressed but she never asks if Iām ok, or checks in. In the last 6 months I have to constantly reach out to see when sheās free, ask if sheās ok, and I never get anything back. Sheāll end with āyou?ā And I answer and a lot of time I just donāt get a reply. It really hurts too when I see her interacting with people on FB but not replying to a text.
I feel pathetic typing this at 29 but itās exhausting to keep the friendship alive when she doesnāt seem to give anything back. I donāt expect nor want constant chats or seeing each other because I understand sheās busy, but a simple āhey how are you?ā Would make a difference but itās non existent. Idk what to do.
She always puts post on FB about how she isnāt great at communicating & it doesnāt mean friendships arenāt there because you donāt talk everyday etc which I agree with, but it feels so one sided!
Another issue, Iām her sons godmother (heās 5) and I hate not seeing him and hate the idea of ending the friendship because of her. I have wrapped gifts for his birthday waiting him
Like orla said I wouldnāt block her. Would you feel comfortable bringing up how you feel with your friend? It seems a shame to end the friendship especially if you are a godmother to her son.
If you donāt feel comfortable having the conversation, I would however put less effort and see how she responds.
If you donāt feel comfortable having the conversation, I would however put less effort and see how she responds.
I hope it's okay if I revive this thread again, wasn't sure where else to put this. Hopefully this doesn't actually turn into a friendship breakdown but who knows at this point.
Basically I was in talks with one of my close friends about her moving in to my flat, but I changed my mind about it and said because I love her so much I wouldn't want to risk our friendship if something went wrong, and she said she was hurt and disappointed but that it was fine (she said it was fine three times so it's definitely Not Fine), and hasn't spoken to me since apart from when she replied to my Happy Easter message, and today she unfollowed me on Twitter and removed me as a follower. I was giving her space and hoping she'd be okay after a while and we'd go back to normal, but apparently not. I don't know what to do. She made out she was absolutely fine with whatever was decided about her moving in, but of course people can't just say what they really feel...how ironic that my attempt to save our friendship might have destroyed it. I wish I'd never brought up the idea of her moving, but there's nothing I can do about it now and unfortunately I'm a very indecisive person, which meant I was torn about what to do and gave her that false hope and ended up hurting her. I really don't want to lose her as a friend but this to me tells me that she's sort of done with me
Basically I was in talks with one of my close friends about her moving in to my flat, but I changed my mind about it and said because I love her so much I wouldn't want to risk our friendship if something went wrong, and she said she was hurt and disappointed but that it was fine (she said it was fine three times so it's definitely Not Fine), and hasn't spoken to me since apart from when she replied to my Happy Easter message, and today she unfollowed me on Twitter and removed me as a follower. I was giving her space and hoping she'd be okay after a while and we'd go back to normal, but apparently not. I don't know what to do. She made out she was absolutely fine with whatever was decided about her moving in, but of course people can't just say what they really feel...how ironic that my attempt to save our friendship might have destroyed it. I wish I'd never brought up the idea of her moving, but there's nothing I can do about it now and unfortunately I'm a very indecisive person, which meant I was torn about what to do and gave her that false hope and ended up hurting her. I really don't want to lose her as a friend but this to me tells me that she's sort of done with me
At this point I would be direct about it and message to say it sheās fine then why is she ignoring you? Tell her you understand sheās upset about the whole flat thing but you didnāt think it would be good for your friendship, suggest meeting up to chat about it.I hope it's okay if I revive this thread again, wasn't sure where else to put this. Hopefully this doesn't actually turn into a friendship breakdown but who knows at this point.
Basically I was in talks with one of my close friends about her moving in to my flat, but I changed my mind about it and said because I love her so much I wouldn't want to risk our friendship if something went wrong, and she said she was hurt and disappointed but that it was fine (she said it was fine three times so it's definitely Not Fine), and hasn't spoken to me since apart from when she replied to my Happy Easter message, and today she unfollowed me on Twitter and removed me as a follower. I was giving her space and hoping she'd be okay after a while and we'd go back to normal, but apparently not. I don't know what to do. She made out she was absolutely fine with whatever was decided about her moving in, but of course people can't just say what they really feel...how ironic that my attempt to save our friendship might have destroyed it. I wish I'd never brought up the idea of her moving, but there's nothing I can do about it now and unfortunately I'm a very indecisive person, which meant I was torn about what to do and gave her that false hope and ended up hurting her. I really don't want to lose her as a friend but this to me tells me that she's sort of done with me
If she still does it and says the whole fake āIām fineā thing then perhaps she wasnāt a true friend in the first place, people change as they get older, just ask yourself what she brings to your friendship, is it one sided? Might be time to just leave it be and move on.
Would you stay with a partner who treated you like that?
Iāve just come across this thread and seen your post, this is so accurate for my life right now. Met my ābest friendā about 2 years ago. We were inseparable but lately, actually this year sheās been really distant and never checks in with me. Whenever I say whatās going on in my life she doesnāt respond. I am over the half assed effort. I donāt tell her anything anymore because I know I wonāt get a reply. Itās ridiculous. I am not even going to bother voicing my issues with her either as I know itāll be my fault and never hers or that sheās struggling like she ALWAYS is but then you see her out and about and commenting on other peoples posts so are you struggling or you really just canāt be bothered with me anymore.Not sure if this thread is active but thought Iād give it a go
My best friend and I met around 7 years ago at a job. She was part time with a 1 year ago and we instantly clicked. I attended her wedding 6 months later and weāve basically been inseparable since. The issue (and I hope this doesnāt sound awful, so bear with me) is that sheās an elevenerife person, but with bad things. Your sad? Sheās depressed. Your tired? Sheās exhausted and can barely keep her eyes open.
She has two kids and has just qualified as a paramedic and sometimes acts as though she is the only person in the world who can be tired and has it worse than anyone. Lots of moaning on FB. I work a high demand job, and Iām renovating a house so I am naturally stressed but she never asks if Iām ok, or checks in. In the last 6 months I have to constantly reach out to see when sheās free, ask if sheās ok, and I never get anything back. Sheāll end with āyou?ā And I answer and a lot of time I just donāt get a reply. It really hurts too when I see her interacting with people on FB but not replying to a text.
I feel pathetic typing this at 29 but itās exhausting to keep the friendship alive when she doesnāt seem to give anything back. I donāt expect nor want constant chats or seeing each other because I understand sheās busy, but a simple āhey how are you?ā Would make a difference but itās non existent. Idk what to do.
I hope since you wrote the post in jan things have gotten better with the friendship or youāve cut ties and moved on and youāve met a better friend now
Iāve just come across this thread and seen your post, this is so accurate for my life right now. Met my ābest friendā about 2 years ago. We were inseparable but lately, actually this year sheās been really distant and never checks in with me. Whenever I say whatās going on in my life she doesnāt respond. I am over the half assed effort. I donāt tell her anything anymore because I know I wonāt get a reply. Itās ridiculous. I am not even going to bother voicing my issues with her either as I know itāll be my fault and never hers or that sheās struggling like she ALWAYS is but then you see her out and about and commenting on other peoples posts so are you struggling or you really just canāt be bothered with me anymore.
I hope since you wrote the post in jan things have gotten better with the friendship or youāve cut ties and moved on and youāve met a better friend now
I had this too! Iād message her about things and she would read it, and would not respond but she would change the subject and talk about her self. Even if I messaged her saying I was feeling low, she just did not care!
Very strange behaviour!!
So strange hey! Iām so glad Iāve finally woken up to being treated like
and on to better things now and making friends with genuine people that actually care about me!If you feel messed up after catching up with a toxic friend - like I did. Cutting contact will remove the poison in your life and you can focus on friends who are sincere and fun!
Thanks Monkeymagic
Update on this, I messaged her asking to meet up so we can talk about it, and reaffirming how sorry I am that I hurt her, and she replied saying she wanted to keep some distance for now because apparently I've ignored her for three weeks, as well as not helping her find a place (which she said she would have done if the situation had been reversed). I feel awful now for not messaging sooner/offering to help but I'm not a mind reader, I thought I was doing the right thing by giving her space. But she obviously sees it as me not caring, which is not true
this is really frustrating and upsetting. I'm still left feeling like I don't know if we're ever going to back to normal because she wants me to leave her alone (possibly forever, who knows). I told her it's fine if she needs more space but I don't know how we can fix this if we don't talk.Ah Iām sorry to hear youāve been through the same! Feels so silly at 30 to be dealing with friend drama but here we are!Iāve just come across this thread and seen your post, this is so accurate for my life right now. Met my ābest friendā about 2 years ago. We were inseparable but lately, actually this year sheās been really distant and never checks in with me. Whenever I say whatās going on in my life she doesnāt respond. I am over the half assed effort. I donāt tell her anything anymore because I know I wonāt get a reply. Itās ridiculous. I am not even going to bother voicing my issues with her either as I know itāll be my fault and never hers or that sheās struggling like she ALWAYS is but then you see her out and about and commenting on other peoples posts so are you struggling or you really just canāt be bothered with me anymore.
I hope since you wrote the post in jan things have gotten better with the friendship or youāve cut ties and moved on and youāve met a better friend now
it hasnāt gotten better, in fact sheās now posting about her brand new bff and her āfavourite person everā while actively ignoring my messages
Iām over it now, I donāt want to make it aggressive or argue because my godson is very important to me & it isnāt his fault so I donāt want to risk being cut out completely. The funny thing is, when we first became friends sheās complain about her bestie and how sheād lost them and now I realise that she is the problem if itās a recurring thingOh that sucks that sheās still ignoring you and has made a new bffAh Iām sorry to hear youāve been through the same! Feels so silly at 30 to be dealing with friend drama but here we are!
it hasnāt gotten better, in fact sheās now posting about her brand new bff and her āfavourite person everā while actively ignoring my messages
but Iām glad you have realised that itās her thatās the problem!Yep Iām in my 30ās too, who would have thought that we would still be dealing with friendship drama at this age, feels like school all over again
I think friendships have lifespans..thereās only so much effort you can put in when itās one sided. Sometimes itās better to cut your losses and let them carry on. Iāve been in a situation where Iād rather not be friends, than only be friends when itās convenient for them.
itās hard when youāre in your 30ās and friends that youāve had nearly your whole life just become strangers for no reason.
itās hard when youāre in your 30ās and friends that youāve had nearly your whole life just become strangers for no reason.
Sorry just seen your message. Iāll be blunt, she sounds like a crappy friend, honestly if this was your partner they would be described as toxic.Thanks Monkeymagic
Update on this, I messaged her asking to meet up so we can talk about it, and reaffirming how sorry I am that I hurt her, and she replied saying she wanted to keep some distance for now because apparently I've ignored her for three weeks, as well as not helping her find a place (which she said she would have done if the situation had been reversed). I feel awful now for not messaging sooner/offering to help but I'm not a mind reader, I thought I was doing the right thing by giving her space. But she obviously sees it as me not caring, which is not true
Youāre right, youāre not a mind reader, if she thought all that she should have told you, you donāt tell someone youāre fine, go radio silent then loose your tatties.
Ask yourself what is she bringing to the party?
Join a club, take up a new hobby, find new friends, this one seems like itās expired.
Take care of you
Oh dear...thank you though for all your help. I've actually been thinking I'm the one who's been a crappy friend because I hadn't replied back on the 3rd April when she told me she was disappointed and upset (but it's fine) partly because I didn't know what to say, and partly because I thought I should leave her be, but that was wrong of me and I should have said *something*. I'm not sure she's ever going to speak to me again now...Sorry just seen your message. Iāll be blunt, she sounds like a crappy friend, honestly if this was your partner they would be described as toxic.
Youāre right, youāre not a mind reader, if she thought all that she should have told you, you donāt tell someone youāre fine, go radio silent then loose your tatties.
Ask yourself what is she bringing to the party?
Join a club, take up a new hobby, find new friends, this one seems like itās expired.
Take care of you