Helen Anderson #6 a vibrating boner dont make me a loner, btw I have a cold not the 'rona

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WELCOME TO THREAD #6: A VIBRATING BONER DON'T MAKE ME A LONER, BY THE WAY I HAVE A COLD NOT THE 'RONA!

🤟 🤟 🤟 Big thank you to @BadassQueenMelon for the title suggestion! (67 votes) 🤟 🤟 🤟

Let's have a recap and get right to the good stuff!

PREVIOUS THREAD: HERE

PREVIOUS THREAD SUMMARY:

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APHETOR HIGHLIGHTS
Date: 13 – 18 Sept 2020
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ZIP LINE: Instagram Highlights | YouTube highlights
TRICYCLE RACE: Instagram Highlights | YouTube Highlights
PLUMMET: Instagram Highlights | YouTube Highlights
BOAT RACE YouTube Highlights
HANG TOUGH: YouTube Highlights
TUNNEL VISION: YouTube Highlights

Towards the end of the Aphetor games, Quirkerz looked bored and was still being left out of photos and often got ignored by her team mates


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MUSIC SUCCESS JEALOUSY - GETS THE BAND BACK TOGETHER
Date: 20 Sept 2020
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- Went to Wales with 20 other content creators three of whom were musicians who celebrated huge successes while on the trip (220 Kid & JC Stewart released a single, and Donel signed two US contracts)
- As soon as Quirkerz came back from the trip, she announced that her band were back working again – despite being together a year and doing absolutely nothing except using their time together to drink and using the pandemic as an excuse not to work or release anything
- Posted multiple stories linking her band's IG page, but wasn't getting attention so randomly announced that she went to hospital but said she's fine, then went back to posting more shit about her band in an attempt to gain more followers


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IS OVERWHELMED WITH AUTUMN CONTENT IDEAS
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- Says she is overwhelmed by all the autumn content ideas she has, leaks a screen shot of her disgusting computer and calender, her 'overwhelming content' consisted of her usual lookbooks, feelings and favs, vlogs and “autumn tings”


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THE LURKER WITH THE WEIRD POUT
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- Tattle mentions her weird pout, and Quirkerz (most likely lurking on Tattle), uploads a random story of her pouting with Christina Aguilera's “Beautiful” in the background


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STRIPS DOWN TO SHOW ARM AND LEG TATTOOS
Source: My Tattoo Collection (YouTube)
Date: 22 Sept 2020

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- Did an updated tattoo video, but this time she decided to show off her tattoos in her underwear
She has no tattoos on her torso, and could have easily worn shorts or a dress to show them off as she has done previously. But that isn't attention seeking enough for her.
- Unapologetic Quirkerz says that she always apologises to her partners about her “woman stamp” tattoo
- She had to name her show girl tattoo after her jealous friend, who threw a strop when Quirkerz got it done
- Planned to get matching tattoos with a bunch of her friends, but on the day they all ditched her and she was the only one to get it
- Goes on a rant about her Be Kind tattoo, tells everyone to be kind yet forgets that she's a crappy person who constantly bitched to her audience about Josie's financial situation and how Josie ate everything, and never cleaned when they lived together. She also would witch about other influencers who had more subs and followers than her, and got more opportunities than her but didn't deserve it because she works harder than them. Sure, Be Kind Quirkerz!
- Doesn't address the Max Rathbone tattoo she got, and when asked about addressing the tattoo and drama (Max had been accused earlier in the year by multiple women of sexual assault, rape, and other inappropriate behaviours), she said that we need to raise awareness about it but she didn't want to talk about it, she said there's plenty of resources and support out there for people dealing with the “shitty boys club” but she never bothered to help link any resources. She also claimed that she had a lot to say about it at the time and but at the time when then multiple allegations came out she only put a single story saying well done to people who spoke about it.
- Still has this weird obsession about viewing her future as being a single mum, mentioned it in previously in multiple videos


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ACCIDENTLY DOES BLACKFACE
Source: Why Trends Don't Work For Me (Instagram)
Date: 24 Sept 2020

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- She decided smear a bunch of brown coloured eyeshadow and grossly over drawn red lipstick on her face for a Instagram skit, but ended up looking like she was attempting blackface


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MORE AWFUL 'FASHION'
Source: Current Fashion Favs & New In (Youtube) |Week of Favourite Outfits (Instagram)
Date: 24 Sept 2020

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- Says she isn't the most fashionable person ever and proves it by displaying god awful unflattering garments which make her look like she's quadrupled in size. (Link #1 | Link #2) and also showed of something that resembled a Halloween costume (Link #3)


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DID I MENTION MY BAND?
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- Continues to post more photo shoots of her band and begs for followers
- Celebrates the fact that she managed to get 5,000 followers in the year that they've been together
- Posts up a story of her Hello Fresh box and tells a story of how when she was RECORDING with her BAND her PRODUCER'S wife had one and she just had to ask a million questions about it, as she couldn't grasp the concept of food and recipes in a box


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#JUSTICEFORDIANE
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- Posts a story telling everyone that Lola is her favourite dog, and Dee is a little shit
- Constantly mentions that the dogs are now banned from getting up on the ridiculous £5,000 sofa
- In her vlog THE NEW DREAM SOFA, FIL shuts the door to stop them from entering the room of the Sofa of Nighmares (at 6:15) and you can hear the dog yelp
- In her vlog IN THE LOFT ALONE she says the dogs are still not allowed on the sofa, and instead she's allowed them to squish up in a tiny plastic bed with a towel for comfort, wonder where the old soft dog bed went?
- Also in that vlog she mentions how Lola will be allowed to spend the night in her bed... no mention of Diane, so we assume she's to be left in the cold cage all alone downstairs
-After people asked her to please let the dogs up on her sofa she decided to mention that she's going to let them up on her terms and said she knows it is a mind fuck for them, it's a bit hard to believe that she will train them to do that since she can't even train them to stop shitting and pissing everywhere


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“SHE'S A bleeping MIXED GRILL!”
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- She posted a picture of herself from when she went to Osea Island with Sky and went in a pool fully clothed (cos she's well quirky)
- After being distracted by her gormless expression, we noticed something even better.... HER CHICKEN BREAST FOOT
- This lead to the hilarious post by @sorenips:
beef knees, chicken breast foot, sausage fingers and a battered liver
.....she's a bleeping mixed grill!


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“SHE LOOKS LIKE ELVIS ON THE TOILET”
Source: 4 Rock n Roll Outfits (Instagram)
Date: 29 Sept 2020

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- Mimed along to T-Rex whilst wearing unflattering and ill fitting clothing. At one point she sits down and looks like Elvis sitting on the toilet


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“I CAN FIT INNA SIZE 10! FOR REALZ!!!”
Source: Body Confidence Podcast
29 Sept 2020

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- In the podcast she had Kat blowing smoke up her arse by constantly stating that she was a size 14
- She says that people need to drop the worry of the size on the label – but still labels her videos as size 14
- Claims that she can fit into a size 10


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BUYS MORE tit FOR HER HOME
Source: SUPERMARKET HOMEWEAR HAUL (Instagram)
Date: 30 Sept 2020

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- Tries to find interesting pieces for her homeware IGTV, after first failing to find anything she decided to get a bunch of candles and a few other bits of tat that she didn't need
- Doesn't know how to use air quotes properly
- Had to mention her BAND in the video with a completely unnecessary story of how she once wrapped herself in a duvet and sat on a sofa
- Becomes a full on potato for her IG post


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THINKS THAT “ALONE” AND “LONELY” MEAN THE SAME THING
Source: Instagram Story
Date: 1 Oct 2020

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- Posted that she got another vibrator from Ann Summers nudge nudge wink wink
- Posts that she received a reply message to her dildo post saying “A sign that you'll die lonely and alone...”
- Thinks she 'got 'em' with her reply of “Lonely and alone mean the same thing dipshit” ..... Yup, she is that dumb.


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COMPLAINS ABOUT ANIMAL CRUELTY, PURCHASES ANIMAL CRUELTY
Source: The New Dream Sofa Vlog (YouTube)
Date: 29 Sept 2020

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- In July she claimed in her “What I Wear Hiking” video that she wasn't happy about owning a coat which was made with down feathers, she it gave her the “heebie jeebies” and also said “it is what it is”
- In October vlog she went shopping and bought herself some very large premium feather down pillows for her Sofa of Nightmares. Didn't mention any heebies or jeebies. She just looked pleased as punch. Thus showing that, yet again, Quirkerz is a big old hypocrite


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FIL MOVES OUT, BUT EVERYTHING'S “FINE”
Source: Getting Some Stuff Off My Chest + A Really Nice Coat (Youtube)
Date: 4 Oct 2020

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- Posts on Instagram that “the thought of making the bed is the worst”. Tattle thinks that FIL has moved out as he was always the one who made it for her.
- Four days later in her “SOME STUFF OFF MY CHEST” video, she says that FIL moved out as they've decided that they need space (despite having plenty of space when Quirkerz went away for 'work' trips and her mum's birthday)
- They were only dating for two months before she desperately had to move him in because she couldn't bare being alone during lock-down
- Continuously blames lock-down for “cheating” her out of a normal beginning to their relationship, classic Quirkerz not taking responsibility for her own actions and blaming everything else
- In her Vlogtober #1 video, she acts so pathetic now FIL has gone by making a big deal about having to go up into her loft alone, and how she has to have her mum over because she has a “cold”


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9 YEARS LATER AND SHE'S STILL COMPLAINING ABOUT GETTING CRITICISM
Source: Getting Some Stuff Off My Chest + A Really Nice Coat (Youtube)
Date: 4 Oct 2020

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- Has another rant about people commenting and judging her and is obsessed over having one critical comment getting multiple likes
- Ignores the fact that the majority of “negative” or “disagreeing” comments she gets are about serious issues and crappy behaviour, such as:
* When she held a stereotypical, racist Mexican party on Cinco de Mayo where she and her friends dressed up in sombreros and fake moustaches
* When she said “fuck old people” (in relation to Brexit)​
* When she ranted about a hair colour company, accused them of mixing up the dyes and told them to fix it, but didn't actually bother to do any research and slapped it on her hair even though she knew it wasn't the colour she wanted, the colour came out exactly how it was supposed to - if she had done the research she would have seen that. People asked her to make things right and make an apology for bashing the company but she said she wasn't sorry, claimed that no one has time to research the colour and said that the company were still in the wrong
* When she was angry in the midst of BLM about people bringing up Jenna Marble's blackface past and said it “didn't age well” and people should live in the “present day” and get over it.​
* When she refused to wear a mask while shopping, as well as touching multiple items in shops (especially at the start of the pandemic) but not buying items after proudly admitted that she doesn't wash her hands after going to the toilet, loves picking her nose and sticks her fingers in her mouth​
- But instead of taking accountability and issuing any apology in her videos she has these frequent rants about how hard it is being an influencer and wants people to solely agree with her on everything.
- Wonders when everybody got so ENTITLED over these topics
- This is the 5th video in 5 months that she's posted about this topic
- She has ranted on twitter about this topic for years

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GETS SICK, DOESN'T GET TESTED, STILL GOES OUT WITH NO MASK
Source: IG Stories / Video: In The Loft Alone – Vlogtober 2020 #1
Date: 7 Oct 2020

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- Posted on IG that she had a self diagnosed cold, promised it wasn't “'rona”, kept going on about how pathetic she was feeling
- She said the snot monster ravaged her and she was super congested but filmed herself talking absolutely fine
- Hints that her friends should be checking in on her
- Gets comments from people who are concerned about her not getting tested, Quirkerz then tries to downplay her illness
- Also filmed herself medicating herself with Strepsils, which are for sore throats – a symptom of the coronavius, claimed she only took them for the Vitamin C (lies)
- In her Vlogtober #1 video she is sick at home with the “cold” but still goes out to the supermarket, she films herself starting to have a coughing fit, and then films herself still sick, but going out to an event around people without wearing a mask
- Got backlash for going out when she was sick and for not wearing a mask, she deleted a lot of comments and answered a couple back saying if people are anxious about her being ill when she's out then “that's their problem” and claimed she had spoken to the doctor – but never mentioned that a single time on the multiple Instagram posts, nor did she mention it in her vlog... we think she lieeeees

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NO REALLY, DID SHE MENTION SHE'S IN A BAND?
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- Hilariously rents a size 8 - 12 showgirl / carnival costume for her music video and models it on IG showing herself squeezed into it and stretching it out


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MELON OF YORE
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Here we capture past moments of sheer Helenness from back in the day:

* Ellie's birthday meal where her friends look fed up of being filmed and Helen describes them as characters in her own sitcom

* Helen gets the "friendship" finger tattoo that no one else got, then walking into Nicoletta's work to show her it and filming her like a crazy person


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HELEN

- Heavily relies on alcohol, sometimes seems intoxicated in some of her videos as she slurs her words and and rolls her eyes back. Her excuse is that she is an extrovert

- Has a child like mentality, and always feels that she gets 'told off' by people if she's done something wrong

- Possibly has body dysmorphia as she claims she's a size 14 but can fit into a size 10 when she is clearly not

- Shows a lot of histrionic personality disorder traits

- Smokes, but tries to act like she's repulsed by smoking in her vlog she said she was going to buy cigarettes as a prop for her costume but she didn't because she “hates” it

- Filmed herself high as a kite on drugs at Download

- Proudly admits that she doesn’t wash her hands after going to the toilet and that picking her nose is her favourite hobby (she is often seen digging around her nostrils a multitude of times in her videos)

- All her boyfriends are clones - they always have dark hair, beards and into some form of fitness sport

- Threw a Mexican party on Cinco de Mayo because she loves Mexican food, her and her friends all dressed up in sombreros and fake moustaches, ate tacos and drank tequila. Received backlash for it and was accused of racist stereotyping, she said she did it because she loves Mexican people and it’s “just a hat and a fake moustache”

- Likes to morph into her boyfriends by becoming obsessed with their interests. With Maff he loved the gym so she became obsessed with the gym. With Mark is hobby was hiking and so Helen had to rush out and get every single piece of hiking equipment and now says how she’s always loved it. With Phil he’s a running and so naturally Helen tried to become a runner despite saying how much she hates it.

- Threw a three day festival piss up at home for a bunch of her friends during lockdown - got caught out on social media whist it was happening

- Bitched about people getting their hair done during lockdown, got hers done a week later.

- Refused to wear a mask when out shopping during the pandemic, made various excuses before admitting she can’t stand them

- Thinks we breathe carbon monoxide

- Claims she’s a teacher and has her own students but she’s really a part time teaching assistant

- Can't pronounce a lot of words, as says she “can't read”

- Compared being extroverted to social anxiety and tried to say that being extroverted could be deemed worse than having social anxiety

- Her dog, Diane, still shits on the floor, always gets yelled at and never lives up to her sister, Lola the “angel”. She can't be bothered to train poor Diane.

- Fake supported BLM by posting the same thing her Gleam team posted, she had a rant about cancel culture and people being upset at Jenna Marbles’ past blackface and said in a vlog that people should get over it. Also said to a viewer “I’m not racist but...” and made excuses and blamed where she lived for being overly white and making her forget her white privilege.

- Had a rant about cultural appropriation on her Instagram story... forgets that she owns a Budda head vase in her living room.

- Tried but hilariously failed at becoming a Sexpert, her advice just consisted of “just do it”, suggested people try to introduce sex toys by whacking it out at the dinner table. Thinks talking during sex is just a way to ask a partner how they are and if they’re having a good time. Also tried to do an erotic photo shoot at home in the garden with her arse hanging out for her neighbours to see. She mounting herself on top of a mirror and it cracked, cutting her knee. She still posted the cracked mirror photo anyway.

- Bought a Dyson Air Wrap with her own money and then got gifted another one by Dyson a few months later, then complained that had she known she was going to get a free one she wouldn’t have bothered spending her own money. Viewers begged her to do a giveaway with the new one but she said she felt uncomfortable doing one because Dyson gifted it to her and her only so she’s going to keep it and give the old one to her mum.

- Has claimed she has been a size 14 since 2014 and still labels her videos as size 14 despite saying she’s gaining a heck of a lot of weight. She accidentally showed a size label in a jean video and it looked like the size label had been cut out.

- Is well know to beg companies for free gifts.

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RELATIONSHIPS
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MAFF (ex-husband)
- Started Dating: 2014
- Engaged: 2015
- Married: July 2017
- Broke up: Nov 2017

- Maff proposed at Disney World Florida, Helen thought it was a crappy proposal and made him repropose back home with a new ring

- According to Helen they broke up because “he didn’t want to be a husband any more”

- They’re still in the process of a divorce, she makes the rare comment on how it's not her fault things are being held up

- Since their break up Maff has sort therapy, got super fit, and has set up and is running his own successful carpentry business

- Helen is still really good friends with Maff's sister Kayleigh



MARK(ex-boyfriend)
- Started Dating: May 2018
- Moved In: April 2018
- Broke up: Nov 2019

- Helen creepily decided to copy Mark's ex-girlfriend by transforming her fresh bob into long blonde hair with extensions, she then took Mark to Disneyland and bought the exact same mouse ears that the ex had in the her social media photo of her and Mark at Disney...

- Moved in as soon as Josie left

- She became obsessed with hiking because Mark loved

- On their first Valentine’s Day together she gave him matching “Till Death Do Us Part” necklaces and she set up a “romantic” scene on the bed to film, but he chucked clothes hangers all over it before she got the camera out to film his reaction. It was so hilariously cringe-worthy as he took out the necklace and then awkwardly decided to keep sniffing the box and asking her why it smelt so good, trying to avoid the gift altogether

- In her coming off the pill video she admitted that she’s off the pill and doesn’t use contraceptives, she loathes condoms and would rather go bare back and do the pull out method. She rolls her eyes at Mark insisting on being safe and using condoms

- After their break up, Mark started dating a girl with ginger hair. Shortly after Helen decided to dye her hair the exact same colour. She also started doing the same things that Mark and his partner were doing such as going to the same restaurants and going for evening picnics at the beach. She would start wearing similar clothing to the new girlfriend, and when new girlfriend said she loved the Tiger King, Helen put out a video titles Tiger King is Overrated.



PHIL(current / possible ex-boyfriend)
- Started Dating: Jan 2020
- Moved In: March 2020
- Moved Out: Sept 2020

- Moved her current boyfriend Phil in 2 months after casually dating, blamed it on the lockdown – but really it's because she be alone

- Mentioned that they still haven't said “I love you” but they're close!

- Bought him a smart TV for the bedroom for him to play COD on

- Bought him a SodaStream

- Mentioned in some videos that sometimes she sleeps in the spare room

- Renovated her garage for him to use as he loves tinkering with cars and bikes (but she wasn't allowed to label any of his containers)

-After a few trips away for 'work', Helen came home and shortly after Phil moved out. Helen claimed that nothing happened and that they were fine, they just decided to have some space from each other but they're still 'very much into each other'


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FRIENDSHIPS
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JOSIE (ex-roomate)
- Moved In: April 2018
- Moved Out: March 2019

- Moved her friend Josie in shortly after her breakup with Maff

- Helen didn’t have any boundaries and would constantly film in Josie’s room when she was out, she even remade her bed and accidentally washed Josie’s Air Pods

- Made Josie into her assistant, and would have to be Helen's camera woman as well as walk and look after the dogs

- She made her pay half of everything despite Josie only having a part time job

- Helen kept bitching and complaining in her vlogs about Josie eating everything and never cleaning up to the point where Helen was so fucked off and demanded that they both pay for a cleaner.

- Josie moved out shortly after and Mark, the new boyfriend, moved in.

- Helen likes to comment puke emojis and spiteful comments like “rank” and “PDA” on pictures of Josie and her boyfriend on Josie's IG

- Josie, Duncan and Conor (Helen's old band mate) are in a band called Hex Friends. (We reckon Hex Friends means Helen's Ex Friends)


KAT (former business partner)
- During the Bridezilla phase she became BFFs with Kat from Rock and Roll Bride

- Feb 2017 Helen and Kat created a business and channel called Confetti Girls which gave advice on wedding planning and married life

- Helen ditched the Confetti Girls shortly after her own wedding / break up



GRACE & ANDY (former? employees)
- When she broke up with Mark she employed a full time assistant (super fan Grace who moved from Kent to Norwich on Helen’s suggestion) and became obsessed with having Grace and (Grace’s boyfriend) Andy around her 24/7 because she couldn’t be alone and needed Grace to film her.

- Viewers hated the “new filming style” and complained about the constant shaking of the camera and how Helen seemed to show off more now she has someone filming rather than being her authentic self

- Drunkenly got naked in front Andy on Christmas Eve when they went out drinking alone together, Andrew had to call Grace to “come get Helen” as she was “crossing a line”

- She ditched them when she got with new boyfriend Phil

- Helen likes to comment on Andy's IG posts pathetic crappy snide comments like “Yuck” and “Looks shit”, she doesn't ever comment on Grace's posts


BEN (band mate)
- Deliberately fed her friend Ben more meat because his girlfriend is vegetarian.

- Booked a place for her and Ben to stay whilst recording new music, the place had a see through bathroom and one bed, displayed a lot of homewrecker vibes throughout that time

- Since her Phil moved out, and Helen throwing herself into all things BAND, she's currently giving us even more creepy homewrecker vibes as she keeps referring to her and Ben as a couple


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FAMILY
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SAVAGE (Mum)
- Helen decided to start calling her mum by her first name “Sue”

- She then developed the nickname into “Savage”

- No one knows the duck why she does this, and her mum never looks happy being called it

PREVIOUS THREAD IMAGE HIGHLIGHTS: (Attached)
 

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Thread #1 | Thread # 2 | Thread #3 | Thread #4 | Thread #5
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WELCOME TO THREAD #6: A VIBRATING BONER DON'T MAKE ME A LONER, BY THE WAY I HAVE A COLD NOT THE 'RONA!

🤟 🤟 🤟 Big thank you to @BadassQueenMelon for the title suggestion! (67 votes) 🤟 🤟 🤟

Let's have a recap and get right to the good stuff!

PREVIOUS THREAD: HERE

PREVIOUS THREAD SUMMARY:

--------------------------------------------
APHETOR HIGHLIGHTS
Date: 13 – 18 Sept 2020
--------------------------------------------
ZIP LINE: Instagram Highlights | YouTube highlights
TRICYCLE RACE: Instagram Highlights | YouTube Highlights
PLUMMET: Instagram Highlights | YouTube Highlights
BOAT RACE YouTube Highlights
HANG TOUGH: YouTube Highlights
TUNNEL VISION: YouTube Highlights

Towards the end of the Aphetor games, Quirkerz looked bored and was still being left out of photos and often got ignored by her team mates


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MUSIC SUCCESS JEALOUSY - GETS THE BAND BACK TOGETHER
Date: 20 Sept 2020
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- Went to Wales with 20 other content creators three of whom were musicians who celebrated huge successes while on the trip (220 Kid & JC Stewart released a single, and Donel signed two US contracts)
- As soon as Quirkerz came back from the trip, she announced that her band were back working again – despite being together a year and doing absolutely nothing except using their time together to drink and using the pandemic as an excuse not to work or release anything
- Posted multiple stories linking her band's IG page, but wasn't getting attention so randomly announced that she went to hospital but said she's fine, then went back to posting more shit about her band in an attempt to gain more followers


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IS OVERWHELMED WITH AUTUMN CONTENT IDEAS
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- Says she is overwhelmed by all the autumn content ideas she has, leaks a screen shot of her disgusting computer and calender, her 'overwhelming content' consisted of her usual lookbooks, feelings and favs, vlogs and “autumn tings”


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THE LURKER WITH THE WEIRD POUT
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- Tattle mentions her weird pout, and Quirkerz (most likely lurking on Tattle), uploads a random story of her pouting with Christina Aguilera's “Beautiful” in the background


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STRIPS DOWN TO SHOW ARM AND LEG TATTOOS
Source: My Tattoo Collection (YouTube)
Date: 22 Sept 2020

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- Did an updated tattoo video, but this time she decided to show off her tattoos in her underwear
She has no tattoos on her torso, and could have easily worn shorts or a dress to show them off as she has done previously. But that isn't attention seeking enough for her.
- Unapologetic Quirkerz says that she always apologises to her partners about her “woman stamp” tattoo
- She had to name her show girl tattoo after her jealous friend, who threw a strop when Quirkerz got it done
- Planned to get matching tattoos with a bunch of her friends, but on the day they all ditched her and she was the only one to get it
- Goes on a rant about her Be Kind tattoo, tells everyone to be kind yet forgets that she's a crappy person who constantly bitched to her audience about Josie's financial situation and how Josie ate everything, and never cleaned when they lived together. She also would witch about other influencers who had more subs and followers than her, and got more opportunities than her but didn't deserve it because she works harder than them. Sure, Be Kind Quirkerz!
- Doesn't address the Max Rathbone tattoo she got, and when asked about addressing the tattoo and drama (Max had been accused earlier in the year by multiple women of sexual assault, rape, and other inappropriate behaviours), she said that we need to raise awareness about it but she didn't want to talk about it, she said there's plenty of resources and support out there for people dealing with the “shitty boys club” but she never bothered to help link any resources. She also claimed that she had a lot to say about it at the time and but at the time when then multiple allegations came out she only put a single story saying well done to people who spoke about it.
- Still has this weird obsession about viewing her future as being a single mum, mentioned it in previously in multiple videos


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ACCIDENTLY DOES BLACKFACE
Source: Why Trends Don't Work For Me (Instagram)
Date: 24 Sept 2020

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- She decided smear a bunch of brown coloured eyeshadow and grossly over drawn red lipstick on her face for a Instagram skit, but ended up looking like she was attempting blackface


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MORE AWFUL 'FASHION'
Source: Current Fashion Favs & New In (Youtube) |Week of Favourite Outfits (Instagram)
Date: 24 Sept 2020

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- Says she isn't the most fashionable person ever and proves it by displaying god awful unflattering garments which make her look like she's quadrupled in size. (Link #1 | Link #2) and also showed of something that resembled a Halloween costume (Link #3)


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DID I MENTION MY BAND?
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- Continues to post more photo shoots of her band and begs for followers
- Celebrates the fact that she managed to get 5,000 followers in the year that they've been together
- Posts up a story of her Hello Fresh box and tells a story of how when she was RECORDING with her BAND her PRODUCER'S wife had one and she just had to ask a million questions about it, as she couldn't grasp the concept of food and recipes in a box


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#JUSTICEFORDIANE
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- Posts a story telling everyone that Lola is her favourite dog, and Dee is a little shit
- Constantly mentions that the dogs are now banned from getting up on the ridiculous £5,000 sofa
- In her vlog THE NEW DREAM SOFA, FIL shuts the door to stop them from entering the room of the Sofa of Nighmares (at 6:15) and you can hear the dog yelp
- In her vlog IN THE LOFT ALONE she says the dogs are still not allowed on the sofa, and instead she's allowed them to squish up in a tiny plastic bed with a towel for comfort, wonder where the old soft dog bed went?
- Also in that vlog she mentions how Lola will be allowed to spend the night in her bed... no mention of Diane, so we assume she's to be left in the cold cage all alone downstairs
-After people asked her to please let the dogs up on her sofa she decided to mention that she's going to let them up on her terms and said she knows it is a mind fuck for them, it's a bit hard to believe that she will train them to do that since she can't even train them to stop shitting and pissing everywhere


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“SHE'S A bleeping MIXED GRILL!”
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- She posted a picture of herself from when she went to Osea Island with Sky and went in a pool fully clothed (cos she's well quirky)
- After being distracted by her gormless expression, we noticed something even better.... HER CHICKEN BREAST FOOT
- This lead to the hilarious post by @sorenips:
beef knees, chicken breast foot, sausage fingers and a battered liver
.....she's a bleeping mixed grill!


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“SHE LOOKS LIKE ELVIS ON THE TOILET”
Source: 4 Rock n Roll Outfits (Instagram)
Date: 29 Sept 2020

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- Mimed along to T-Rex whilst wearing unflattering and ill fitting clothing. At one point she sits down and looks like Elvis sitting on the toilet


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“I CAN FIT INNA SIZE 10! FOR REALZ!!!”
Source: Body Confidence Podcast
29 Sept 2020

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- In the podcast she had Kat blowing smoke up her arse by constantly stating that she was a size 14
- She says that people need to drop the worry of the size on the label – but still labels her videos as size 14
- Claims that she can fit into a size 10


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BUYS MORE tit FOR HER HOME
Source: SUPERMARKET HOMEWEAR HAUL (Instagram)
Date: 30 Sept 2020

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- Tries to find interesting pieces for her homeware IGTV, after first failing to find anything she decided to get a bunch of candles and a few other bits of tat that she didn't need
- Doesn't know how to use air quotes properly
- Had to mention her BAND in the video with a completely unnecessary story of how she once wrapped herself in a duvet and sat on a sofa
- Becomes a full on potato for her IG post


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THINKS THAT “ALONE” AND “LONELY” MEAN THE SAME THING
Source: Instagram Story
Date: 1 Oct 2020

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- Posted that she got another vibrator from Ann Summers nudge nudge wink wink
- Posts that she received a reply message to her dildo post saying “A sign that you'll die lonely and alone...”
- Thinks she 'got 'em' with her reply of “Lonely and alone mean the same thing dipshit” ..... Yup, she is that dumb.


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COMPLAINS ABOUT ANIMAL CRUELTY, PURCHASES ANIMAL CRUELTY
Source: The New Dream Sofa Vlog (YouTube)
Date: 29 Sept 2020

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- In July she claimed in her “What I Wear Hiking” video that she wasn't happy about owning a coat which was made with down feathers, she it gave her the “heebie jeebies” and also said “it is what it is”
- In October vlog she went shopping and bought herself some very large premium feather down pillows for her Sofa of Nightmares. Didn't mention any heebies or jeebies. She just looked pleased as punch. Thus showing that, yet again, Quirkerz is a big old hypocrite


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FIL MOVES OUT, BUT EVERYTHING'S “FINE”
Source: Getting Some Stuff Off My Chest + A Really Nice Coat (Youtube)
Date: 4 Oct 2020

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- Posts on Instagram that “the thought of making the bed is the worst”. Tattle thinks that FIL has moved out as he was always the one who made it for her.
- Four days later in her “SOME STUFF OFF MY CHEST” video, she says that FIL moved out as they've decided that they need space (despite having plenty of space when Quirkerz went away for 'work' trips and her mum's birthday)
- They were only dating for two months before she desperately had to move him in because she couldn't bare being alone during lock-down
- Continuously blames lock-down for “cheating” her out of a normal beginning to their relationship, classic Quirkerz not taking responsibility for her own actions and blaming everything else
- In her Vlogtober #1 video, she acts so pathetic now FIL has gone by making a big deal about having to go up into her loft alone, and how she has to have her mum over because she has a “cold”


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9 YEARS LATER AND SHE'S STILL COMPLAINING ABOUT GETTING CRITICISM
Source: Getting Some Stuff Off My Chest + A Really Nice Coat (Youtube)
Date: 4 Oct 2020

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- Has another rant about people commenting and judging her and is obsessed over having one critical comment getting multiple likes
- Ignores the fact that the majority of “negative” or “disagreeing” comments she gets are about serious issues and crappy behaviour, such as:
* When she held a stereotypical, racist Mexican party on Cinco de Mayo where she and her friends dressed up in sombreros and fake moustaches
* When she said “fuck old people” (in relation to Brexit)​
* When she ranted about a hair colour company, accused them of mixing up the dyes and told them to fix it, but didn't actually bother to do any research and slapped it on her hair even though she knew it wasn't the colour she wanted, the colour came out exactly how it was supposed to - if she had done the research she would have seen that. People asked her to make things right and make an apology for bashing the company but she said she wasn't sorry, claimed that no one has time to research the colour and said that the company were still in the wrong
* When she was angry in the midst of BLM about people bringing up Jenna Marble's blackface past and said it “didn't age well” and people should live in the “present day” and get over it.​
* When she refused to wear a mask while shopping, as well as touching multiple items in shops (especially at the start of the pandemic) but not buying items after proudly admitted that she doesn't wash her hands after going to the toilet, loves picking her nose and sticks her fingers in her mouth​
- But instead of taking accountability and issuing any apology in her videos she has these frequent rants about how hard it is being an influencer and wants people to solely agree with her on everything.
- Wonders when everybody got so ENTITLED over these topics
- This is the 5th video in 5 months that she's posted about this topic
- She has ranted on twitter about this topic for years

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GETS SICK, DOESN'T GET TESTED, STILL GOES OUT WITH NO MASK
Source: IG Stories / Video: In The Loft Alone – Vlogtober 2020 #1
Date: 7 Oct 2020

--------------------------------------------
- Posted on IG that she had a self diagnosed cold, promised it wasn't “'rona”, kept going on about how pathetic she was feeling
- She said the snot monster ravaged her and she was super congested but filmed herself talking absolutely fine
- Hints that her friends should be checking in on her
- Gets comments from people who are concerned about her not getting tested, Quirkerz then tries to downplay her illness
- Also filmed herself medicating herself with Strepsils, which are for sore throats – a symptom of the coronavius, claimed she only took them for the Vitamin C (lies)
- In her Vlogtober #1 video she is sick at home with the “cold” but still goes out to the supermarket, she films herself starting to have a coughing fit, and then films herself still sick, but going out to an event around people without wearing a mask
- Got backlash for going out when she was sick and for not wearing a mask, she deleted a lot of comments and answered a couple back saying if people are anxious about her being ill when she's out then “that's their problem” and claimed she had spoken to the doctor – but never mentioned that a single time on the multiple Instagram posts, nor did she mention it in her vlog... we think she lieeeees

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NO REALLY, DID SHE MENTION SHE'S IN A BAND?
--------------------------------------------
- Hilariously rents a size 8 - 12 showgirl / carnival costume for her music video and models it on IG showing herself squeezed into it and stretching it out


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MELON OF YORE
--------------------------------------------
Here we capture past moments of sheer Helenness from back in the day:

* Ellie's birthday meal where her friends look fed up of being filmed and Helen describes them as characters in her own sitcom

* Helen gets the "friendship" finger tattoo that no one else got, then walking into Nicoletta's work to show her it and filming her like a crazy person


--------------------------------------------
Thread #1 | Thread # 2 | Thread #3 | Thread #4 | Thread #5
--------------------------------------------

HELEN

- Heavily relies on alcohol, sometimes seems intoxicated in some of her videos as she slurs her words and and rolls her eyes back. Her excuse is that she is an extrovert

- Has a child like mentality, and always feels that she gets 'told off' by people if she's done something wrong

- Possibly has body dysmorphia as she claims she's a size 14 but can fit into a size 10 when she is clearly not

- Shows a lot of histrionic personality disorder traits

- Smokes, but tries to act like she's repulsed by smoking in her vlog she said she was going to buy cigarettes as a prop for her costume but she didn't because she “hates” it

- Filmed herself high as a kite on drugs at Download

- Proudly admits that she doesn’t wash her hands after going to the toilet and that picking her nose is her favourite hobby (she is often seen digging around her nostrils a multitude of times in her videos)

- All her boyfriends are clones - they always have dark hair, beards and into some form of fitness sport

- Threw a Mexican party on Cinco de Mayo because she loves Mexican food, her and her friends all dressed up in sombreros and fake moustaches, ate tacos and drank tequila. Received backlash for it and was accused of racist stereotyping, she said she did it because she loves Mexican people and it’s “just a hat and a fake moustache”

- Likes to morph into her boyfriends by becoming obsessed with their interests. With Maff he loved the gym so she became obsessed with the gym. With Mark is hobby was hiking and so Helen had to rush out and get every single piece of hiking equipment and now says how she’s always loved it. With Phil he’s a running and so naturally Helen tried to become a runner despite saying how much she hates it.

- Threw a three day festival piss up at home for a bunch of her friends during lockdown - got caught out on social media whist it was happening

- Bitched about people getting their hair done during lockdown, got hers done a week later.

- Refused to wear a mask when out shopping during the pandemic, made various excuses before admitting she can’t stand them

- Thinks we breathe carbon monoxide

- Claims she’s a teacher and has her own students but she’s really a part time teaching assistant

- Can't pronounce a lot of words, as says she “can't read”

- Compared being extroverted to social anxiety and tried to say that being extroverted could be deemed worse than having social anxiety

- Her dog, Diane, still shits on the floor, always gets yelled at and never lives up to her sister, Lola the “angel”. She can't be bothered to train poor Diane.

- Fake supported BLM by posting the same thing her Gleam team posted, she had a rant about cancel culture and people being upset at Jenna Marbles’ past blackface and said in a vlog that people should get over it. Also said to a viewer “I’m not racist but...” and made excuses and blamed where she lived for being overly white and making her forget her white privilege.

- Had a rant about cultural appropriation on her Instagram story... forgets that she owns a Budda head vase in her living room.

- Tried but hilariously failed at becoming a Sexpert, her advice just consisted of “just do it”, suggested people try to introduce sex toys by whacking it out at the dinner table. Thinks talking during sex is just a way to ask a partner how they are and if they’re having a good time. Also tried to do an erotic photo shoot at home in the garden with her arse hanging out for her neighbours to see. She mounting herself on top of a mirror and it cracked, cutting her knee. She still posted the cracked mirror photo anyway.

- Bought a Dyson Air Wrap with her own money and then got gifted another one by Dyson a few months later, then complained that had she known she was going to get a free one she wouldn’t have bothered spending her own money. Viewers begged her to do a giveaway with the new one but she said she felt uncomfortable doing one because Dyson gifted it to her and her only so she’s going to keep it and give the old one to her mum.

- Has claimed she has been a size 14 since 2014 and still labels her videos as size 14 despite saying she’s gaining a heck of a lot of weight. She accidentally showed a size label in a jean video and it looked like the size label had been cut out.

- Is well know to beg companies for free gifts.

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RELATIONSHIPS
--------------------------------------------

MAFF (ex-husband)
- Started Dating: 2014
- Engaged: 2015
- Married: July 2017
- Broke up: Nov 2017

- Maff proposed at Disney World Florida, Helen thought it was a crappy proposal and made him repropose back home with a new ring

- According to Helen they broke up because “he didn’t want to be a husband any more”

- They’re still in the process of a divorce, she makes the rare comment on how it's not her fault things are being held up

- Since their break up Maff has sort therapy, got super fit, and has set up and is running his own successful carpentry business

- Helen is still really good friends with Maff's sister Kayleigh



MARK(ex-boyfriend)
- Started Dating: May 2018
- Moved In: April 2018
- Broke up: Nov 2019

- Helen creepily decided to copy Mark's ex-girlfriend by transforming her fresh bob into long blonde hair with extensions, she then took Mark to Disneyland and bought the exact same mouse ears that the ex had in the her social media photo of her and Mark at Disney...

- Moved in as soon as Josie left

- She became obsessed with hiking because Mark loved

- On their first Valentine’s Day together she gave him matching “Till Death Do Us Part” necklaces and she set up a “romantic” scene on the bed to film, but he chucked clothes hangers all over it before she got the camera out to film his reaction. It was so hilariously cringe-worthy as he took out the necklace and then awkwardly decided to keep sniffing the box and asking her why it smelt so good, trying to avoid the gift altogether

- In her coming off the pill video she admitted that she’s off the pill and doesn’t use contraceptives, she loathes condoms and would rather go bare back and do the pull out method. She rolls her eyes at Mark insisting on being safe and using condoms

- After their break up, Mark started dating a girl with ginger hair. Shortly after Helen decided to dye her hair the exact same colour. She also started doing the same things that Mark and his partner were doing such as going to the same restaurants and going for evening picnics at the beach. She would start wearing similar clothing to the new girlfriend, and when new girlfriend said she loved the Tiger King, Helen put out a video titles Tiger King is Overrated.



PHIL(current / possible ex-boyfriend)
- Started Dating: Jan 2020
- Moved In: March 2020
- Moved Out: Sept 2020

- Moved her current boyfriend Phil in 2 months after casually dating, blamed it on the lockdown – but really it's because she be alone

- Mentioned that they still haven't said “I love you” but they're close!

- Bought him a smart TV for the bedroom for him to play COD on

- Bought him a SodaStream

- Mentioned in some videos that sometimes she sleeps in the spare room

- Renovated her garage for him to use as he loves tinkering with cars and bikes (but she wasn't allowed to label any of his containers)

-After a few trips away for 'work', Helen came home and shortly after Phil moved out. Helen claimed that nothing happened and that they were fine, they just decided to have some space from each other but they're still 'very much into each other'


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FRIENDSHIPS
--------------------------------------------

JOSIE (ex-roomate)
- Moved In: April 2018
- Moved Out: March 2019

- Moved her friend Josie in shortly after her breakup with Maff

- Helen didn’t have any boundaries and would constantly film in Josie’s room when she was out, she even remade her bed and accidentally washed Josie’s Air Pods

- Made Josie into her assistant, and would have to be Helen's camera woman as well as walk and look after the dogs

- She made her pay half of everything despite Josie only having a part time job

- Helen kept bitching and complaining in her vlogs about Josie eating everything and never cleaning up to the point where Helen was so fucked off and demanded that they both pay for a cleaner.

- Josie moved out shortly after and Mark, the new boyfriend, moved in.

- Helen likes to comment puke emojis and spiteful comments like “rank” and “PDA” on pictures of Josie and her boyfriend on Josie's IG

- Josie, Duncan and Conor (Helen's old band mate) are in a band called Hex Friends. (We reckon Hex Friends means Helen's Ex Friends)


KAT (former business partner)
- During the Bridezilla phase she became BFFs with Kat from Rock and Roll Bride

- Feb 2017 Helen and Kat created a business and channel called Confetti Girls which gave advice on wedding planning and married life

- Helen ditched the Confetti Girls shortly after her own wedding / break up



GRACE & ANDY (former? employees)
- When she broke up with Mark she employed a full time assistant (super fan Grace who moved from Kent to Norwich on Helen’s suggestion) and became obsessed with having Grace and (Grace’s boyfriend) Andy around her 24/7 because she couldn’t be alone and needed Grace to film her.

- Viewers hated the “new filming style” and complained about the constant shaking of the camera and how Helen seemed to show off more now she has someone filming rather than being her authentic self

- Drunkenly got naked in front Andy on Christmas Eve when they went out drinking alone together, Andrew had to call Grace to “come get Helen” as she was “crossing a line”

- She ditched them when she got with new boyfriend Phil

- Helen likes to comment on Andy's IG posts pathetic crappy snide comments like “Yuck” and “Looks shit”, she doesn't ever comment on Grace's posts


BEN (band mate)
- Deliberately fed her friend Ben more meat because his girlfriend is vegetarian.

- Booked a place for her and Ben to stay whilst recording new music, the place had a see through bathroom and one bed, displayed a lot of homewrecker vibes throughout that time

- Since her Phil moved out, and Helen throwing herself into all things BAND, she's currently giving us even more creepy homewrecker vibes as she keeps referring to her and Ben as a couple


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FAMILY
--------------------------------------------

SAVAGE (Mum)
- Helen decided to start calling her mum by her first name “Sue”

- She then developed the nickname into “Savage”

- No one knows the duck why she does this, and her mum never looks happy being called it

PREVIOUS THREAD IMAGE HIGHLIGHTS: (Attached)
I haven't even read this yet but I know this is going to be a masterpiece. Bravo, Luna. Bravo!

Edit: Read it, it was.
 
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Can you believe I actually had to edit it down as I hit the character limit :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO:
 
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I’m new to the thread so still getting to grips with it all, but thanks Luna! Your posts crack me up.
 
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all those masks and still wore a disposable one?!
Quirkerz Covidson is so healthy she doesn't need to carry masks with her, don't you know? It's just a cold!! Scatterbrained twit probably mooched one off the salon because she was too lazy to remember her own.
 
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I'm being proper tinfoil hat (blame sleep deprivation) but there are a couple of accounts on here that are...sus. Post history, post content. I won't ever say who because they may well not be, but IF you are someone who we've been discussing and you're amongst us (I feel like a medium doing a seance) then PLEASE, we would love some hot, fresh tea. And most of us would do the same so you won't be judged for being on here! Unless you're Helen, in which case STOP SPREADING RONA.

 
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Honest to god why does she get new hair every five minutes?!?

All of Mixed Grillz content is her basically spaffing money up a wall. Can't wait for that influencer bubble to burst.
 
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Incredible Lunamoon!! I always crack up in your summaries when you chuck in the “she’s well quirky” 😂 Seriously how does one person do so much stupid tit?! bleeping hell Quirkerz!!
 
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I'm being proper tinfoil hat (blame sleep deprivation) but there are a couple of accounts on here that are...sus. Post history, post content. I won't ever say who because they may well not be, but IF you are someone who we've been discussing and you're amongst us (I feel like a medium doing a seance) then PLEASE, we would love some hot, fresh tea. And most of us would do the same so you won't be judged for being on here! Unless you're Helen, in which case STOP SPREADING RONA.

I would LOVE this but we know Helen reads here so I highly doubt if they are they’ll give anything away... as much as Helen’s a dumb witch she’d be able to figure it out and it would cause them so much irl tit
She’s insufferable at the best of times so imagine her actually having a vendetta against you, god almighty haha
 
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Also, she has all those masks and still wore a disposable one?!
I wonder if she turned up to the hairdresser's without a mask and they made her wear one as it's mandatory 🤔

But then she should have had one on the train...
 
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I would LOVE this but we know Helen reads here so I highly doubt if they are they’ll give anything away... as much as Helen’s a dumb witch she’d be able to figure it out and it would cause them so much irl tit
She’s insufferable at the best of times so imagine her actually having a vendetta against you, god almighty haha
Good point, she's a malicious friend, imagine her as your enemy!

I wonder if she turned up to the hairdresser's without a mask and they made her wear one as it's mandatory 🤔

But then she should have had one on the train...
That would be very on-brand of her
 
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I'm being proper tinfoil hat (blame sleep deprivation) but there are a couple of accounts on here that are...sus. Post history, post content. I won't ever say who because they may well not be, but IF you are someone who we've been discussing and you're amongst us (I feel like a medium doing a seance) then PLEASE, we would love some hot, fresh tea. And most of us would do the same so you won't be judged for being on here! Unless you're Helen, in which case STOP SPREADING RONA.

so intrigued by this theory 🤣
 
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Honestly it probably looks like my account is suss as I rarely post and when I do it is about Mark lol I am more of a lurker just. Not guilty, I am from Ireland. You know, where Enya is *actually* from Helen?!
 
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Honestly it probably looks like my account is suss as I rarely post and when I do it is about Mark lol I am more of a lurker just. Not guilty, I am from Ireland. You know, where Enya is *actually* from Helen?!
I’m the exact same 🤣 we look like a mark fan club. Wish I was someone interesting & involved haha
 
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Also, she has all those masks and still wore a disposable one?!
salon probably made her wear a disposable mask they supplied because I doubt she washes her own 🤣 especially with this cold she has 🤢

I'm being proper tinfoil hat (blame sleep deprivation) but there are a couple of accounts on here that are...sus. Post history, post content. I won't ever say who because they may well not be, but IF you are someone who we've been discussing and you're amongst us (I feel like a medium doing a seance) then PLEASE, we would love some hot, fresh tea. And most of us would do the same so you won't be judged for being on here! Unless you're Helen, in which case STOP SPREADING RONA.

my only claim to fame is I live near her, someone I know works with Ben (she was told how much Helen earns but can’t remember dammit) and my bf has seen her out in public hahah I am yet to encounter anyone

Oh also thank you Luna, your summaries are the highlight of my day (no idea if the gig will post I’ve never posted one before haha)
 

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It's ok guys because this person clearly knows for Absolute certain that Helen washes her hands and uses antibacterial and always wears her mask I mean it's hardly like she would ever go out without a mask e.t.c. lol
 

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