Happy belated birthday! I'm sorry it wasn't a good one - I get migraines too and it sucks having one on your birthday.I feel you. I don't use social media or anything, but yesterday was my birthday and I didn't hear anything from anyone. My husband took the day off work but spent most of the day dealing with legal stuff and was so annoyed and in a bad mood all damn day. I had a migraine and spend the entire day and night in bed in pain but also feeling so so alone, like who gives a tit about me? No one. I hate birthdays.
Sorry for the self pity
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Happy Belated Birthday! I'm sorry to hear you had a crappy day. I hope today is better for you
Sorry for the self pity
I’m dreading the whole lockdown over, pubs open, seeing people with friends again. It makes me feel like I’m missing out! When I see people tag their friends on social media saying ‘can’t wait to go out again’, meh. I don’t wish to be in a lockdown forever of course, I’m sure I’ll make friends *one day* - I started my PhD last January thinking I would make friends but haven’t met 1 person due to ‘rona.
I was semi-friends with my ex’s friends but we split up last year so obviously don’t talk to them anymore. I don’t feel lonely as I’m independent and like my own space, it would just be nice to have a few people to talk to about different things, life. Tattle is great for that though
I was semi-friends with my ex’s friends but we split up last year so obviously don’t talk to them anymore. I don’t feel lonely as I’m independent and like my own space, it would just be nice to have a few people to talk to about different things, life. Tattle is great for that though
I was talking to my other half the other night about this. He has lots of friends through football, work and a friendship group he’s known since he was 8. He was on a day off and spent most of the day on his phone chatting to his mates which is lovely. I said if I put my phone away for a week and got it out again at the end of the week I’d probably only have missed calls from scam calls and a text from my mum asking me if I’m ok. He doesn’t understand why I’m so bothered.
My dad passed away 12 years ago and he was quite young (just turned 40) and as a result my mum has become a recluse. shes lost her friends as she’s not kept in touch and many didn’t know how to cope with her grief. She’s in her early 50’s with no friends so relies on me and my sister to be her company but obviously with our own families and work we can’t always be there especially now with lockdown so she spends most of the day watching tv, cleaning or with her dog who is like her baby. I don’t want to be like my mum she is says all the time she’s very lonely, I don’t want a massive circle of friends just one!
My dad passed away 12 years ago and he was quite young (just turned 40) and as a result my mum has become a recluse. shes lost her friends as she’s not kept in touch and many didn’t know how to cope with her grief. She’s in her early 50’s with no friends so relies on me and my sister to be her company but obviously with our own families and work we can’t always be there especially now with lockdown so she spends most of the day watching tv, cleaning or with her dog who is like her baby. I don’t want to be like my mum she is says all the time she’s very lonely, I don’t want a massive circle of friends just one!
Sorry to hear about your Dad, 40 is very young to pass away. Could you and your Mum join things when the lockdown is over? it doesnt have to be together to meet some new people. It is harder in your 50s etc because it seems everyone is in couples and has family stuff going on.X
I’m 33 engaged and we have a 16 year old daughter , 13 year old daughter and my son is 9 months old....so I started young! I instantly lost all my school friends when I got pregnant at 16 Im sure their parents told them I was trouble! And then as they went out living life I was at home with the baby.....from then and I kid you not every friend I’ve made has either tried it on with my partner, betrayed me somehow or literally only wanted me when they wanted something! So in the end I’ve given up I truly almost feel women are arseholes as friends.....which I know isn’t true but I feel like something must be wrong with me to attract such kinds of “friends” . I am an only child and long so much for a sister.....my mum had several stillbirths so unfortunately 3 siblings died full term 
I have the odd work acquaintance and partners of my fiancées friends I occasionally speak with..... I’m not desperately sad about it as I’m so content with my children and my family. But deep down it does cut deep that I don’t have a best friend I’ve never had one really since primary
I have the odd work acquaintance and partners of my fiancées friends I occasionally speak with..... I’m not desperately sad about it as I’m so content with my children and my family. But deep down it does cut deep that I don’t have a best friend I’ve never had one really since primary
I had my first child at only 18, got pregnant at 17 and a lot of my friends ditched me because of it. Their parents didn't want them hanging around with me because I had got pregnant at such a young age, so that automatically meant I was bad news to them. Little did they know that their precious little daughters who they thought were too innocent and angelic to be around someone like me, had all been sleeping around since they were 14. I was one of the unlucky ones that was extremely inexperienced and naive and got pregnant almost my first time.I’m 33 engaged and we have a 16 year old daughter , 13 year old daughter and my son is 9 months old....so I started young! I instantly lost all my school friends when I got pregnant at 16 Im sure their parents told them I was trouble! And then as they went out living life I was at home with the baby.....from then and I kid you not every friend I’ve made has either tried it on with my partner, betrayed me somehow or literally only wanted me when they wanted something! So in the end I’ve given up I truly almost feel women are arseholes as friends.....which I know isn’t true but I feel like something must be wrong with me to attract such kinds of “friends” . I am an only child and long so much for a sister.....my mum had several stillbirths so unfortunately 3 siblings died full term
I have the odd work acquaintance and partners of my fiancées friends I occasionally speak with..... I’m not desperately sad about it as I’m so content with my children and my family. But deep down it does cut deep that I don’t have a best friend I’ve never had one really since primary
Anyway, 2 of those friends that were forced to ditch me by their parents ended up coming back and the 3 of us were friends for many years, up until around 2015 when one of them was having a hen weekend in Spain. I couldn't go for childcare reasons, so I was then ostracised and not invited to her wedding. My boyfriend at the time got an invite, but I didn't and we haven't spoken since.
I now don't have any friends at all. For years it didn't really bother me but lately I have been wishing for another like minded adult to talk to. It's just me and my daughters just now. My mum is in her 70's and we are 2 completely different people, so our conversations aren't like those you would have with a friend. I feel a bit pathetic that I'm this age with absolutely no friends to show for my life.
I think female friendship can be a funny thing. People rave on about it but I’ve always found that when it’s good it’s fantastic, but if things turn sour it’s very hard to come back from that and resolve it. I think women tend to have longer memories and once they’ve ‘crossed’ each other they never quite trust that person again.
Compared to male friendship (and I know I’m massively generalising here) it can be a lot more intense. Basically the highs are higher and the lows are lower.
Compared to male friendship (and I know I’m massively generalising here) it can be a lot more intense. Basically the highs are higher and the lows are lower.
Aw I wish I could offer to be a bridesmaid for all you guys who are worried about it!
I totally get it, people make a "bride squad" look so appealing but i have definitely been asked to be a bridesmaid just to make up numbers before and you get a real insight into just how forced and fake it is
would have rather been a bridesmaid for one of you lovely lot!
I totally get it, people make a "bride squad" look so appealing but i have definitely been asked to be a bridesmaid just to make up numbers before and you get a real insight into just how forced and fake it is
would have rather been a bridesmaid for one of you lovely lot!
I lost friends over lockdown. I do well in places like Tattle etc. because we are actually here to talk about something and there are no hard feelings if someone disappears for a while. I struggle to maintain the weekly "how's life" chats via text. I would much rather hear someone's voice, hear them laugh, and see their face on facetime! But most people I know would rather text, so I let it go.
normal conversations don't last days and don't take a turn for the worse if you don't reply for a day. so it's mad it's the case with phones.
It feels unfair sometimes as I don't force people that are anxious about calling to call me, but it means that if I don't text - which I don't like doing - the friendship disappears. I struggle with social media for the same reason. I can't be arsed to scroll through everyone's stories and comment and like and engage all the time. The cumulative time spent doing this is astounding. But people see you not posting/not engaging as you being unsupportive and a lurker. I have plenty of love to give! I just don't want to have to do it by spending hours a day on my phone, sorry.
normal conversations don't last days and don't take a turn for the worse if you don't reply for a day. so it's mad it's the case with phones.
It feels unfair sometimes as I don't force people that are anxious about calling to call me, but it means that if I don't text - which I don't like doing - the friendship disappears. I struggle with social media for the same reason. I can't be arsed to scroll through everyone's stories and comment and like and engage all the time. The cumulative time spent doing this is astounding. But people see you not posting/not engaging as you being unsupportive and a lurker. I have plenty of love to give! I just don't want to have to do it by spending hours a day on my phone, sorry.
Agree with almost everything you said here.
Yes it can be super fake and forced! A friend was telling me how one of the people she asked to be a bridesmaid she doesn't actually want as one but felt like she had to ask, which meant another person she would have rather had didn't get asked as it would have been too many/an odd number or whatever. Super silly!Aw I wish I could offer to be a bridesmaid for all you guys who are worried about it!
I totally get it, people make a "bride squad" look so appealing but i have definitely been asked to be a bridesmaid just to make up numbers before and you get a real insight into just how forced and fake it is
I moved to a new area over a year ago (away from family, school friends and uni friends) and I have no idea how to make new friends!!! I’m lucky that I live with my partner but I’ve never been one of those girls whose only friend is their boyfriend and I’ve been getting really upset about the situation I do kickboxing which is a lot of fun but the ladies are all older than me and have settled with kids and I find it difficult to make friends with them - honestly considered having kids just to make some friends (only partially joking
). Anyone have any tips for making friends post pandemic restrictions?
I do kickboxing which is a lot of fun but the ladies are all older than me and have settled with kids and I find it difficult to make friends with them - honestly considered having kids just to make some friends (only partially joking). Anyone have any tips for making friends post pandemic restrictions?I feel the same as you all , it’s so strange seeing so many other people feeling the same way.
One half of me isn’t bothered, I’ve got my family and stuff and I’m pretty happy with my own company when I get a minute away from the kids ...
But the other half of me is just dying for someone to have a chat with, to laugh and rant to . If something is bothering me I just bottle it up , like if it’s something that my other half a has done I can’t really whinge to him about how much he is pissing me off so then it just festers and I feel like I’m been short all the time with everyone I come into contact with
plus then I do overthink things a lot so I always think ‘everyone else has got at least one friend they can rely on and talk to but I haven’t so it must be something wrong or unlikeable about me’
I went to baby classes with my first but I never gelled with anyone, some mums where really cliquey and snobby, others were judgey and some were just too nice if that makes sense I think I’m a nice person, but I am a bit rough around the edges I love a laugh and I’m a bit of a potty mouth So I wasn’t accepted by the yummy mummies
But I am a good friendI just wish I knew where to bump into people to make connections
One half of me isn’t bothered, I’ve got my family and stuff and I’m pretty happy with my own company when I get a minute away from the kids ...
But the other half of me is just dying for someone to have a chat with, to laugh and rant to . If something is bothering me I just bottle it up , like if it’s something that my other half a has done I can’t really whinge to him about how much he is pissing me off
so then it just festers and I feel like I’m been short all the time with everyone I come into contact with plus then I do overthink things a lot so I always think ‘everyone else has got at least one friend they can rely on and talk to but I haven’t so it must be something wrong or unlikeable about me’
I went to baby classes with my first but I never gelled with anyone, some mums where really cliquey and snobby, others were judgey and some were just too nice if that makes sense
I think I’m a nice person, but I am a bit rough around the edges I love a laugh and I’m a bit of a potty mouth So I wasn’t accepted by the yummy mummies But I am a good friendI just wish I knew where to bump into people to make connections
I love my own company and could do without the drama. Atm I'm happy with my social situation 
even if it makes me a loner
even if it makes me a loner
Amen to that. People find it weird. I prefer less drama and I like doing what I want and staying at homeI love my own company and could do without the drama. Atm I'm happy with my social situation
I’ve never posted in this thread before but it’s been so interesting to read through and see people who I relate to on this. I do actually enjoy time by myself often, and I’m good at filling it up with things I like. But I’m very jealous of other girls/women who have a best friend or group they know they can rely on, someone they know will always invite them to everything and vice versa. I just finished uni in August and I do have friends from uni who I love, but we just don’t have that trust where you know they’ll always come through for you.
Hello i just found this.
My and my bf don't have any friend well more him then me. I have just a few. But we never hang out see each other message each other a lot so basically i don't have friends. We (bf&i) find our lives are better we don't have to take advice from them. Go to each other houses. Pay for meals when its our turn. We feel better of just us two together. Friends seem to let us down and fail in trusting them.
People say its not normal but when you been through hell with some friends its just better been a loner at least you can please your self and friens don't have to judge you.
I feel like it's even hard to 'make friends' on social media too.
I get requested by people I I barely know , but people I do come across in real life never bother to add me . I've added people before and they just haven't accepted, but I've accidentally clicked on strangers and sent them a request to have them accept.
I don't bother with it now, social media is for my own use, not to connect with other people.
I get requested by people I I barely know , but people I do come across in real life never bother to add me . I've added people before and they just haven't accepted, but I've accidentally clicked on strangers and sent them a request to have them accept.
I don't bother with it now, social media is for my own use, not to connect with other people.
I am so glad I found this thread. I grew apart from my group of school friends when I had a baby. I have 2 or 3 really close friends, but I worried I was some kind of weirdo for not having a big group of girls anymore.
Making friends as an adult is hard. I just feel like I am annoying people.
Making friends as an adult is hard. I just feel like I am annoying people.
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