Footballers & WAGs #7

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Thegreenbush96

VIP Member
True, but rent boys also don't have the best reputation for discretion, either.

And I think that someone "loved and seen as quite pure" would have the least trouble if they came out, honestly¹. I still don't think it's massively likely anyone will actually come out, though.

¹Second least would be someone who became a professional having been openly gay since school and never hiding it. They'd most likely have to be bloody good and very thick skinned to actually get that far though.
I mean a lot of people who really want a coming out soon (Including me) would prefer it be someone totally prepared to be a figurehead and a true role model. He fits the Bill totally but let’s face it most PL footballers are total idiots and are poor role models.
 

NotJackieWeaver

Well-known member
I mean a lot of people who really want a coming out soon (Including me) would prefer it be someone totally prepared to be a figurehead and a true role model. He fits the Bill totally but let’s face it most PL footballers are total idiots and are poor role models.
And that's all he will ever be known as. The first gay footballer. All this because of his close friendship with a guy.
As for gay footballers using prostitutes etc a lot don't use anyone as they're too scared.
 

Tea_Time_12

New member
And that's all he will ever be known as. The first gay footballer. All this because of his close friendship with a guy.
As for gay footballers using prostitutes etc a lot don't use anyone as they're too scared.
Gay or not we really need to end stigmas on close male friendships. In other cultures it's common for male friends to hug each other and things that would seem affectionate to the western world. They can sit next to their male friend and have it not mean anything other than having a place to sit down.

There are some openly gay sports people in America. In men's sports they've either come out shortly after retiring or within a year or so of their career ending.
 

misscl4

Well-known member
Footballers have the means and access to far far better mental health support than the majority of the public, I don’t think you are aware of how busy and under strain the Mental Health services are in the NHS. At the end of the day it is up to the individual to get help (like anything in life) they have to reach out and want to get help. Counselling is very expensive for the everyday person, after the free sessions (which aren’t always available immediately).

Thats separate to the issues around being gay in footballer, it will take a long time to change attitudes sadly, a lot of homophobia comes from religion.
 

NotJackieWeaver

Well-known member
Footballers have the means and access to far far better mental health support than the majority of the public, I don’t think you are aware of how busy and under strain the Mental Health services are in the NHS. At the end of the day it is up to the individual to get help (like anything in life) they have to reach out and want to get help. Counselling is very expensive for the everyday person, after the free sessions (which aren’t always available immediately).

Thats separate to the issues around being gay in footballer, it will take a long time to change attitudes sadly, a lot of homophobia comes from religion.
You're forgetting the pride and the trust issue. Its hard for normal everyday average Joe's let alone men who rely on a certain issue. How do they find a good professional, how do they know who to trust? It's not easy to admit you need help especially for footballers. I mean they're being more open about it now, Ben Chillwell was speaking out about his mental health last year bit still so much stigma.
 

Tea_Time_12

New member
Footballers have the means and access to far far better mental health support than the majority of the public, I don’t think you are aware of how busy and under strain the Mental Health services are in the NHS. At the end of the day it is up to the individual to get help (like anything in life) they have to reach out and want to get help. Counselling is very expensive for the everyday person, after the free sessions (which aren’t always available immediately).

Thats separate to the issues around being gay in footballer, it will take a long time to change attitudes sadly, a lot of homophobia comes from religion.
True but as an employer the clubs should provide access to mental health services for their employees. A lot of clubs have sports psychologists so why not a non sports one as well? There's a whole backroom medical staff dedicated to physiotherapy but they can't spare some space for a few mental health professionals, even on a part time basis? Some of them are going to have the financial means to access private care but players in lower leagues don't make as much as PL players. Others may want to go through the club first because a lot of it may stem from the footballing world.
 

misscl4

Well-known member
You're forgetting the pride and the trust issue. Its hard for normal everyday average Joe's let alone men who rely on a certain issue. How do they find a good professional, how do they know who to trust? It's not easy to admit you need help especially for footballers. I mean they're being more open about it now, Ben Chillwell was speaking out about his mental health last year bit still so much stigma.
Yes I get that, but there’s also a pride and trust issue for women too. There’s a stigma for everyone, people often put footballers on pedestals and can empathise with them but not other members of the public or their own neighbours. Having fantastic salaries with access to world class therapy immediately is far better than waiting to be referred for months and months and being unable to pay yourself privately.

True but as an employer the clubs should provide access to mental health services for their employees. A lot of clubs have sports psychologists so why not a non sports one as well? There's a whole backroom medical staff dedicated to physiotherapy but they can't spare some space for a few mental health professionals, even on a part time basis? Some of them are going to have the financial means to access private care but players in lower leagues don't make as much as PL players. Others may want to go through the club first because a lot of it may stem from the footballing world.
Depends on the club, many are struggling financially, PL yes, but I have more sympathy for people with Mental Health issues and no/delayed access to help.
 

elliexmae

Member
Yes I get that, but there’s also a pride and trust issue for women too. There’s a stigma for everyone, people often put footballers on pedestals and can empathise with them but not other members of the public or their own neighbours. Having fantastic salaries with access to world class therapy immediately is far better than waiting to be referred for months and months and being unable to pay yourself privately.


Depends on the club, many are struggling financially, PL yes, but I have more sympathy for people with Mental Health issues and no/delayed access to help.
I feel like it's quite the opposite. I'm not denying the privilege footballers and famous people in general have with their status and wealth but some people act like that solves everything and rarely show any empathy when these people are going throw tough times. It's not uncommon to see people dehumanising them and acting as if they aren't capable of human emotions and of having problems like everyone else.
 

misscl4

Well-known member
I feel like it's quite the opposite. I'm not denying the privilege footballers and famous people in general have with their status and wealth but some people act like that solves everything and rarely show any empathy when these people are going throw tough times. It's not uncommon to see people dehumanising them and acting as if they aren't capable of human emotions and of having problems like everyone else.
At the end of the day through my work I know of people who haven’t not been able to get access to vital MH support and taken their own lives, whether that be because of lack of access, strains or lack of money to pay privately. So I will always have more empathy for those who do not have the means.
 

NotJackieWeaver

Well-known member
At the end of the day through my work I know of people who haven’t not been able to get access to vital MH support and taken their own lives, whether that be because of lack of access, strains or lack of money to pay privately. So I will always have more empathy for those who do not have the means.
Same but I also know of those who feel too proud to access help, if they go to the club it might be a sign of weakness. Where do they go? Can't go nhs because people will think you have money go private. How do they pick the right help? Who do they turn to for support? Normal folk can go to the doctors long wait but in the system. A lot of players their doctors are linked to the club and its that whole trust thing. Men struggle to ask for help a lot more than women and in football theyre seen as untouchable and its harder to ask for help. Its nothing to do with help readily available it is it's the whole actually asking and knowing where to turn to and not feeling isolated. I feel sorry for anyone experiencing mental health poor rich etc like I said its not about having access it's about feeling comfortable enough to do it. We have sites everywhere telling us where to go but do you really think it's easy for say Ben Chilwell or Michael Keane to just ring samaritans? They admitted they eventually went to someone they trusted within the clubs and so many don't have that. And again lower leagues not so much money, those with no money due to addiction etc you can't generalise. I get what you're saying but it's not easy for them either as that stigma is bigger because of views like they have money and easy access.
 

elliexmae

Member
At the end of the day through my work I know of people who haven’t not been able to get access to vital MH support and taken their own lives, whether that be because of lack of access, strains or lack of money to pay privately. So I will always have more empathy for those who do not have the means.
I absolutely understand where you coming from. I just think people sometimes dehumanise wealthy and famous people as if they can't too have problems. Not saying they have it harder, just saying they can struggle too.
 

L3moning

Well-known member
All this and in women’s football most are presumed gay!
Well, at one time literally half the England women's team was gay. I can't remember if they all ever played in the same team but you had Casey Stoney, Kelly Smith¹, Fran Kirby, Lianne Sanderson, Jordan Nobbs, Toni Duggan, etc

And this isn't counting Alex Scott and Lucy Bronze, who have never come out, but are widely rumoured to be gay.

Maybe we need a gender neutral version of "WAGs" if we are going to talk about gay men and women's footballers!

I suggest SAPs, for "Spouses and Partners" :ROFLMAO:

(Not entirely serious, obviously, but it would be kind of cool in a way, but also not, if the media covered women's football the way they cover mens).

¹Who only came out after her career.
 

olivia321

Well-known member
A lot of you are talking real sense right now. Didn’t Clarke Carlisle start up a support group or similar for footballers struggling with poor mental health or did I imagine that?
The driver whose lorry he jumped in front of ended up taking his own life because he couldn’t cope with what happened, the rippling effect it has is awful that too goes unnoticed.
 

NotJackieWeaver

Well-known member
Tyrone Mings has openly discussed seeing a therapist - he usually has a counselling session before a match.
Harry kane has spoken about this too

A lot of you are talking real sense right now. Didn’t Clarke Carlisle start up a support group or similar for footballers struggling with poor mental health or did I imagine that?
Tony Adams did a aa group I think
 

Householdmystery

Well-known member
Well, at one time literally half the England women's team was gay. I can't remember if they all ever played in the same team but you had Casey Stoney, Kelly Smith¹, Fran Kirby, Lianne Sanderson, Jordan Nobbs, Toni Duggan, etc

And this isn't counting Alex Scott and Lucy Bronze, who have never come out, but are widely rumoured to be gay.

Maybe we need a gender neutral version of "WAGs" if we are going to talk about gay men and women's footballers!

I suggest SAPs, for "Spouses and Partners" :ROFLMAO:

(Not entirely serious, obviously, but it would be kind of cool in a way, but also not, if the media covered women's football the way they cover mens).

¹Who only came out after her career.
Most of the Arsenal women’s team are dating eachother. I wonder what that’s like when it comes to another team bidding for them🤣
 
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