Flight phobia advice

[pinkmug]

I couldn't find another thread on the subject so here we are.

Are there any fellow sufferers? Do you have tips and tricks that were actually useful, other than the age old advice of 'turbulances are not dangerous'?

My anxiety around flying gets worse or better but never really goes away, despite my efforts to just go through the thing. (I think this also triggered a fear around sea travel as well, the bumpy rides feeling similar to choppy seas.) I don't travel often but when I need to, I'm always terribly worried and uncomfortable and the whole flight feels like a trial. Never been on a long haul flight (longest was 4.5 hours I think) and while I do my best to calm down, the idea of a bad flight is enough for me to reconsider going anywhere at all.

 

[Snippysnips]

Have you tried getting anything from the doctors for it? I know some people will get either sleeping pills for long flights or diazepam to help, I've never tried them but I do get recuse remedy from the store, it's a herbal spray I use whenever I start to get really anxious an it helps to calm me down, I also try an sleep but I know for some that might never happen (it sounds silly but I'll try an pretend am trying sleep on a bus an the roads bumpy) or I'll try an focus on what's going on like the food being prepared an drinks being brought round, sometimes playing games on the TV helps or I'll take some paper an a pencil an try an doodle

I like you also hate flying, as a teen it actually took the pilots to drag me to get on them because I was a mess, after you could take seatbelts off I was then sat in the cockpit till I needed to go back for landing, of course now they don't do this but back then it was the only way my folks could get me to fly, so I totally understand how you feel

I know it's not always possible an will be hard to get but if you need to do long flights (I've been to American now 4 times at 8h flights) then try an see if you can get the double decker aircraft, it sounds crazy wanting such a massive aircraft when you are scared of even the small ones but honestly it's incredibly smooth, people say they are louder with take off but I heard no difference in sound with smaller, the first time I went on one though it almost took the pilots again to get me on it because the size freaked me the hell out, but after one flight I felt much more calmer with them than the smaller, I guess it's size helps keep it more balanced an I barely felt it land as well, the breaks were on before I knew it had landed

I don't think there's really any easy way to get over it, I also hate when people try an tell you all the same things over an over again, oh they are safer than cars, the turbulence is normal, you are up here with hundreds of others etc, none of that helps when you hate the things, I had a bad flight coming home in 2012 from America an was almost crying at how turbulent it was, we literally bounced, the staff were told to sit down an everything had to be locked away, the pilot knew a few of us were anxious so he at least every few minutes kept us updated on when we would go through a bad spot an how long it was since he was keeping in contact with the flights ahead of us, it was good to be warned but I thought I'd never fly again tbh, it took alot to get on the next one in 2015 an that was my first double decker which helped get rid of that fear of another bad flight

 

[shadowcat5]

I am with you and I am the same with boats. It's not the flying itself for me, I have claustrophobia and I am autistic.

I find that booking my seats helps me. I always choose the aisle seat and the front, if front is not available I'll go for the very back. Front means I'm more likely to get off quickly and back means I can avoid the chaos of everyone standing up (and sometimes they let you out the back doors).

I also find that getting on dead last helps. Not enough to hold up a plane or anything, but I will sit and wait until the very end of the queue of people getting on before I get on. 1. cause it's more time being free to move around and 2. cause everyone is sat down and bags done by the time I get on which means I don't have to deal with people fussing around me. If it's one of those systems that's like 'aisles 1-10 come now', I will ask the desk attendant if I can get on last cause I have autism.

The flight itself, comfy clothes, lots of snacks and I download enough episodes of something to be able to sit through it. so like an 8 flour flight I could watch about 8 episodes in that time. I think that helps me cause it feels like I'm just in my own little world but like a timed world whereas reading is infinite for me.

 

[Murphygirl]

I’m not a great flier although better than I was. The cabin crew advised me to focus on the lights on the aisle floor when taking off and for turbulence it’s best to sit in the middle of the plane

 

[Megansnarkle]

My husband finds that either a window seat where he can see the wing or a first row seat (on a budget airline) where he can see the cabin crew going about their job being totally unfussy helps. Along with something that takes his mind off the situation (like a puzzle) it helps him.

Personally I'm fine with flying but was coming back from a long haul work trip, I was absolutely shattered after very little sleep and in business class (because work). I slept nearly the whole way home stretched out flat and remember that we hit a patch of turbulence, it was like being rocked to sleep, absolutely delightful.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

The best place is to sit in the front end to negate most of the turbulance.
Also I have a prescription from my GP for diazepam for when I fly.

Sometimes I do better than other times but I still do it because my desire to travel is bigger than my fear.

But as an fyi I prefer to take the Eurostar whenever I can

 

[HM03]

I take diazepam and it does help. I've also had hypnotherapy for it and I've managed to do a 14 hour trip to Thailand without any crying which is massive for me. There is also a good book I will try and attach. On the flight I get a bottle of water and put it on my tray table and if there is any turbulence I will watch it and it barely moves as much as how it feels

 

[Bellaboonew_12]

I'm the same, had a panic attack on my last flight and was ran down the aisle 4 minutes before landing to be strapped into a staff seat,

Ear phones with a movie on so you can't hear the noises and jump to conclusions.

Look at the airhosts faces if you are worried - if they don't look worried everything is fine.

Breathe, sleep, diazapan, alcohol,

Look on flight radar and see just how many flights there are. There is also a good scared of flying book by Alan Carr - it helped me quite a bit.

Don't book your flight until the last minute, the longer it's booked the longer you worry.

Try sit near an exit or over a wing.

That's all I got for you

 

[Sunflower91]

I’m in the same boat. I’ve always been a nervous flier but I had a bit of a traumatic flight that just made it even worse.
Ive been prescribed with diazepam before but the dosage was too low to mitigate against panic attacks.
My tactic now that means I can fly alone is to take travel sickness tablets - they make me drowsy enough to fall asleep before takeoff most times. And if they don’t I’m usually too tired to panic too much about takeoff and early turbulence. I also take my noise cancelling headphones and have them on the noise cancelling setting throughout the flight to muffle the plane noises and bring a soft toy and something cozy to wear. I also make sure I have my iPad with a couple of tv shows I like downloaded.
If turbulence happens and I start to panic I close my eyes and just breathe. I find watching the plane move about is much worse than the feeling. I’m the same when the plane banks (for some reason I get convinced it’s going to topple over).
A bit of a left field thing that helps me is that I’ve become quite the fan of mayday/air crash investigation. Sounds completely counter intuitive but it did make me realise how many safety features and how much training for all kinds of events pilots have to go through as well as that now a lot of flights are mostly automated with pilot intervention at key points/when needed. Also that the flights I commonly take have minimal chance of using airlines that have poor safety records and they will follow the guidance on maintenance. Air travel is one of the safest ways of travelling, because when things do go very wrong it’s so catastrophic the industry is forced to make s quick change to diagnose and fix the problems. I wouldn’t watch it just before a flight or during one though.

 

[Clovis]

I developed a fear of flying after experiencing bad turbulence and didn't fly for years. I mentioned this one day to a friend and she recommended Bach Rescue Remedy pastilles. They're little jellies in a tin, you can find them in Boots.

Anyway, I tried them and they actually worked for me. It might've been merely a placebo effect, but now I get through my flights without stressing. I usually save a few podcasts, shut my eyes and try to forget that I'm even on a plane.

That sounds like an infomercial hahaha.

 

[pinkmug]

I developed a fear of flying after experiencing bad turbulence and didn't fly for years. I mentioned this one day to a friend and she recommended Bach Rescue Remedy pastilles. They're little jellies in a tin, you can find them in Boots.

Anyway, I tried them and they actually worked for me. It might've been merely a placebo effect, but now I get through my flights without stressing. I usually save a few podcasts, shut my eyes and try to forget that I'm even on a plane.

That sounds like an infomercial hahaha.

I have rescue remedy pills and I take them but of course they don't shut down my fear like I hope they would. As I don't have a prescription for a stronger medication, they are all I have

 

[gummy-bear]

I bleeping hate flying but I have to do it regularly for work (long haul)
Things that have helped me;
- melatonin is a god send. It doesn’t knock you out but I go from being tit scared of the thought of turbulence to finding it a minor inconvenience. You can get it prescribed by your doctor
- I always sit by a window as I find looking at the wing helpful if I’m feeling panicked. Even in strong turbulence it barely moves
- night flights are less turbulent than day flights
- if you are travelling long haul then turn on your map on the tv where it says all the flight details. If you’re going through turbulence watch the altitude- it is amazing how little the plane moves even when it feels like big drops!
- the biggest thing I tell myself is that fear can’t get in the way of life. I hate flying but the destination is always worth it. I also think it’s important to go outside of your comfort zone and do stuff that scares you. I always feel really proud of myself afterwards for doing something that feels horrible!
- avoid coffee before a flight!!

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

I bleeping hate flying but I have to do it regularly for work (long haul)
Things that have helped me;
- melatonin is a god send. It doesn’t knock you out but I go from being tit scared of the thought of turbulence to finding it a minor inconvenience. You can get it prescribed by your doctor
- I always sit by a window as I find looking at the wing helpful if I’m feeling panicked. Even in strong turbulence it barely moves
- night flights are less turbulent than day flights
- if you are travelling long haul then turn on your map on the tv where it says all the flight details. If you’re going through turbulence watch the altitude- it is amazing how little the plane moves even when it feels like big drops!
- the biggest thing I tell myself is that fear can’t get in the way of life. I hate flying but the destination is always worth it. I also think it’s important to go outside of your comfort zone and do stuff that scares you. I always feel really proud of myself afterwards for doing something that feels horrible!
- avoid coffee before a flight!!

I 100% agree with everything you said! Although I prefer an aisle seat because I wee a lot
I've never heard of melatonin for anxiety, how does it work? I normally get diazepam for long haul flights but it doesn't always work for me

 

[Upintheair83]

So iv got some words of comfort and advice all in one. But I'm cabin crew and my partner is a pilot. And when I have a passenger at work who is scared,( and it happens alot- )I always say that I worry more about my partner when he's driving to and from work, than I ever do when he's flying a plane. It probably won't help much and sounds cliche, but I promise you it's true.
I think people are scared of flying because they don't do it every day and the element of not being in control.
Believe it or not, years ago I used to be afraid of flying and it was only when I stayed in a hotel that was next to an airport, that I actually started to conquer my fear. It was seeing just how many aircraft take off/ land in a day.... and are totally fine!!! it was like I was being desensitised to it- if that makes sense? Like it was becoming more familiar. Then when i trained to become crew the emergency procedures we have to know inside and out made the whole thing less scary, as it gave me back an element of control I suppose.
So it can be done, fears can be conquered. If I was you, maybe download flight radar and see just how many flights there are in the skies right at this moment. It will blow your mind! It will show you just how safe it really is. I wish you all the best and I really hope you can overcome it. The world really is an amazing place and there's so many memories to be made in it. I'm certain you have it in you to overcome it. Big hugs to you.

 

[littlepup]

A girl I worked with did a fear of flying course run by an airline as she was desperate to enjoy and not limit her honeymoon (I want to say Virgin but can’t be sure, I know a few do them). She said it was really helpful and she’s flown many times since without incident.

 

[stardust1]

I know this is a slightly old thread but how did you get anything prescribed? My GP said they don’t do anything like that anymore.

I actually feel like cancelling my holiday however it’s not actually a fear of flying for me it is a fear of feeling sickI have been sick or at least felt sick on every single flight I have been on so now i work my self into a frenzy that i will be sick, i end up going hot and dizzy and like i am going to faint. It’s seriously keeping me awake worrying

 

[Lady Macbeth]

I’m in Bali ( arrived yesterday from Australia) and I’m feeling highly anxious being away from home. Anyone else feel like this when they travel?

 

[littlepup]

I’m in Bali ( arrived yesterday from Australia) and I’m feeling highly anxious being away from home. Anyone else feel like this when they travel?

I don’t usually but Bali made me anxious. Are you in Kuta?

 

[Norfolking Good]

I have three commercial pilots in the family and I don’t know if it helps but the training they have to do is insane and soooo many exams to pass. Just to be a first officer they need something like 1000hrs of flying in control of the plane and to be a captain is even more. They regularly have to do simulation training throughout the year and all of the flight attendants are also highly trained in first aid and emergencies.
Go on Flight radar the webpage and zoom out-so the whole world is in view and you’ll see how many flights are in the air in that moment, it’s astonishing! Hopefully it puts into perspective that theyll land safely and everyone was ok

 

[Lady Macbeth]

I don’t usually but Bali made me anxious. Are you in Kuta?

Seminyak . I’m ok with flying - it’s the anxiety of being so far from home.