Fathering Autism #14

[lovesis]

He knew dam well she wanted a snack. He was just trying to be cute (failed). They rarely say no to snacks and when they do its probably only for show and then give her one as soon as camera is off. He initially told her no to a snack today and then she yanked him to the fridge anyway. That would have been the time to say "I said NO. Have some water instead." But he's afraid to say no. Or like I said before....put out some veggies or some of that fruit Pilla supposedly went to the store for.

I think he was right in getting up to see what she wanted. I would have complained if he didn’t.

And they do tell her no to snacks. She signs that constantly. Someone called CPS on them because they thought they weren’t feeding her enough because she ask for snacks so much.

Again, I’m not sticking up for them....just going off what I see in the vlogs.

 

[Mother2]

Yes. He was supposed to say no. He had just told her she had a snack. She wants to pitch a fit. Time her out in her room. All he is doing is negatively reinforcing her behavior. I can understand giving in if snack time is at say 2 PM and it's 1:45 PM. But he literally just said to her you just ate.

Absolutely!! I think he should have told her not to pull him either. I would've said," what do you need?", and when she signed food, I would have said," no, you just had something.", and if she still wanted to be rude and try and jerk me around, I would've said ," I said no. We dont pull, you can go to your room for awhile now." That's how it should be handled. If a tantrum ensued, then, I would've escorted her to her room and had her stay there until she got some control but, under no circumstances would she have received a snack or jerked me around.

I imagine if he says no it will escalate to a tantrum because she is used to getting her way. What a nightmare to live like that!

Yeah, that's not autism, that's just them creating a monster.

 

[lovesis]

Absolutely!! I think he should have told her not to pull him either. I would've said," what do you need?", and when she signed food, I would have said," no, you just had something.", and if she still wanted to be rude and try and jerk me around, I would've said ," I said no. We dont pull, you can go to your room for awhile now." That's how it should be handled. If a tantrum ensued, then, I would've escorted her to her room and had her stay there until she got some control but, under no circumstances would she have received a snack or jerked me around.


Yeah, that's not autism, that's just them creating a monster.

You would be about 10 years too late with Abbie. I doubt she understand what do not pull means. They are going to have issues with her because she was never taught how to respond or behave to situations. In that moment if Asa would have said we do not pull or tug when asking for things, she would have stared off into space, stimmed like crazy and ran around.... she would have no idea what he was talking about.

 

[spacecase]

Pooping on boats, weight gain and bloats, bragging and gloats.

This one is great!

 

[Mother2]

You would be about 10 years too late with Abbie. I doubt she understand what do not pull means. They are going to have issues with her because she was never taught how to respond or behave to situations. In that moment if Asa would have said we do not pull or tug when asking for things, she would have stared off into space, stimmed like crazy and ran around.... she would have no idea what he was talking about.

It would've been a good start though. I would've made her go to her room and chill regardless. There is no way I would've given her a damn snack and let her jerk me around and bully me into stopping my work. (Or whatever he was doing.) It's all because they "choose their battles ", but, what they really should be saying is,"we love getting bullied and are terrified of our severely IDD daughter".

 

[PhartBlossom]

Asss says.,. we didn't do so well with the "Academic Stuff" today... lol. That yelling and the constant asking for food would drive me insane. I would not like to have her stopping what I was doing so she could pick out her 100th snack of the day.

Why do they have to open the whole refridge and pantry for her to peruse? Seems like they would pick a few items.. these are her snacks.. and this is what she has to choose from.. or better yet have predetermined snack times.. and that is it.. these people drive me crazy.

THAT drives me nuts. They need a basket full of things it is ok for her to choose and let her freakin' choose. Then maybe a drawer in the fridge with Abbie's snacks and let her choose. It is ridiculous to watch that. And if she just had a snack? NO means NO. Redirect her. Parenting 101 folks.

 

[lovesis]

It would've been a good start though. I would've made her go to her room and chill regardless. There is no way I would've given her a damn snack and let her jerk me around and bully me into stopping my work. (Or whatever he was doing.) It's all because they "choose their battles ", but, what they really should be saying is,"we love getting bullied and are terrified of our severely IDD daughter".

Ok now that I rewatched the scene, it does seem like Abbie was begging for food and when told no she demanded Asa get up. Yes, that is rude but I don’t know what to think because of Abbies condition. They say she’s never full but also I know being a teen I could eat and snack all day. She doesn’t have the freedom to just grab a snack like a neurotypical child does. I can’t really comment on this situation because it infuriates me when she tries to get their attention and they ignore her, so I was happy to see Asa get off his butt to see what she wanted.

THAT drives me nuts. They need a basket full of things it is ok for her to choose and let her freakin' choose. Then maybe a drawer in the fridge with Abbie's snacks and let her choose. It is ridiculous to watch that. And if she just had a snack? NO means NO. Redirect her. Parenting 101 folks.

I agree with this. Maybe this can help so she’s not constantly asking them for a snack. I remember one day Becca said she left out celery sticks for her. They can do simple things like that. And if she wants a snack they can tell her she has celery sticks on the counter or a basket of snacks like you said. Maybe it would teach her to stretch out her snacking. Once her snacks are gone in her basket, she will know she’s not getting anymore.

Why are we on this forum(the ppl Asa and Priscilla dislike) better at coming up with ideas that will be better suited for Abbie than her parents. I don’t see what’s so hard about doing research and finding solutions to problems they have with Abbie. They are just making it harder on themselves being lazy.

 

[cucumber]

I have a virtual seder (for Passover) on Zoom tonight so I will be watching later...can’t wait to read your reactions!

Happy Passover!

 

[Juicy Lucy]

Just got done watching entire vlog. That violently pulling ppl tit wouldn't fly in my house. That's not how anyone wants someone to get their attention. Can you imagine someone walking up to you and telling you, "your all done with that", and jerking you up from your desk and jerking you all the way to the kitchen to get something for them? Yeah, that's pretty bleeping rude. But it's super cute!! So it will continue and get worse until she does it to the wrong person. The jumping in the pool in her clothes is an everyday thing and just showing how bad off she is mentally. She dosen't know or care that it's not time to swim and the next time they pass a sewer and she wants to swim, she go right in, no problem. She dosen't know or care what the difference is between a pool and other bodies of water and she will attack ppl to get in. Whatever Abigail wants, she is going to do bc, her parents have taught her that. Today's vlog just proved my bully theory beautifully. Abigail will bully and physically MAKE ppl do what she wants. That was shown today.


I respect your opinion but, dont share it. She has been shown other ways to communicate, she has just been taught that the bully and physical way is the "best and fastest way", to get it done and that is inappropriate in my opinion.

Even Asa and the big lady have tried to get her to stop pulling folks in the past, so even they recognize that its inappropriate. They just wont follow thru with it.
[/QUOTE
She probably learned to bully from ASSA

 

[cucumber]

[/QUOTE] She reads all of ouf comments here and is starting to realize we are right.
[/QUOTE]
I would only hope that was it. I know she reads comments here and maybe she is realizing that people are questioning her weird relationship with these people. But hey----no Summer giggling like a hyena!

 

[Hotographer512]

What is that new yell? Its like half yell, half growl!

She reminds me of a race car!!!

I think its too long, wont fit.

 

[PhartBlossom]

What's with the weird quote thing going on? It's all wonky!

 

[Hotographer512]

How can he be sure snack is what she actually wanted when sometimes she signs a bunch of random things. He needed to get up to see what she wanted....and yes she directed him to the refrigerator. So at that point was he supposed to say no?

Last time he didn’t get up to see what she wanted, there was 2 pages here complaining about how he didn’t get up.

Im just trying to understand what y’all expect. This is definitely one of those chose your battle moments that makes sense. I hear them tell her no to snacks all the time.

I’m not standing up for them, Just pointing out further what their inconsistencies has caused.

I hear ya but I think all we want and expect is for them to fuking pay attention to her.
Especially when she's asking them the best ways she knows how to give her their attention.
All that in the vlog today proved was they are not consistent.
But we knew that already.
Yes he tells her no all the time to snacks because it, more times than not, doesn't fit into his vlog narrative.
Today it did because he's shy on content.

 

[Justcheckingin]

I don’t usually watch anymore because the vlogs make me sad...I watched just now and the first few minutes I’m thinking no one can take a minute and fix Abbie’s hair so it’s not in her face? She’s clearly bothered by it because she is pushing it away. And why don’t they use the first/then method when she wants food? For instance....when she signs for food and Asssss says you just had food. He could say, First, let’s go have a glass of water and clean up your room(or clean up wherever), then we’ll get a snack. He tells her no then ‘let’s’ her drag him to the refrigerator. She knows if she bugs him long enough she’ll get her food. I’m not even a few minutes in and I’m already pissed..

 

[Noir Fan]

Happy Passover!

Thank you! Happy Easter (in advance)!

 

[Sadoldhen]

There used to be signs on the fridge that where there to tell Ab that, it wasn’t food time, and in one vlog, Brandi can be seen telling Ab that it wasn’t time to eat.

 

[Glowfish]

I have a virtual seder (for Passover) on Zoom tonight so I will be watching later...can’t wait to read your reactions!

I have a virtual seder (for Passover) on Zoom tonight so I will be watching later...can’t wait to read your reactions!

Happy Passover! One day I hope to experience it!!

 

[erised2020]

now I’m a hater guys...cause I said they could afford their own stuff...smh these leghumpers...

 

[Hotographer512]

now I’m a hater guys...cause I said they could afford their own stuff...smh these leghumpers...

Those leghumpers make me so mad!
I really wish they had the balls to come in here and talk to us like that.

 

[Mother2]

Ok now that I rewatched the scene, it does seem like Abbie was begging for food and when told no she demanded Asa get up. Yes, that is rude but I don’t know what to think because of Abbies condition. They say she’s never full but also I know being a teen I could eat and snack all day. She doesn’t have the freedom to just grab a snack like a neurotypical child does. I can’t really comment on this situation because it infuriates me when she tries to get their attention and they ignore her, so I was happy to see Asa get off his butt to see what she wanted.




I agree with this. Maybe this can help so she’s not constantly asking them for a snack. I remember one day Becca said she left out celery sticks for her. They can do simple things like that. And if she wants a snack they can tell her she has celery sticks on the counter or a basket of snacks like you said. Maybe it would teach her to stretch out her snacking. Once her snacks are gone in her basket, she will know she’s not getting anymore.

Why are we on this forum(the ppl Asa and Priscilla dislike) better at coming up with ideas that will be better suited for Abbie than her parents. I don’t see what’s so hard about doing research and finding solutions to problems they have with Abbie. They are just making it harder on themselves being lazy.

The reason she doesn't have the freedom to grab a snack is bc she eats until she pukes. The reason they ignore her is bc its constant. She dosen't ever stop asking for things. It's either bathroom, food, car ride, bath or go. It's always tit she wants and you can't give anyone what they want 100% of the time. That's something every parent has to refrain from doing, not just this family. They don't always refrain from it either bc, that's why she is such a bully and a little witch. Most of the time she flips the duck out when they don't comply with her demands. She dosen't just ask for things, she demands things.

now I’m a hater guys...cause I said they could afford their own stuff...smh these leghumpers...

What thread is this, I'm coming to the rescue. I'm tired of these nasty fuckers...