Ex Jehovah’s Witnesses Support Thread!

[ChampagneBox]

TRIGGER WARNING - MENTIONS OF ABUSE

Not sure how popular this thread will be, not sure how many of us are on here and I hope it’s allowed!

Anyone who’s been involved in the religion knows how hard it can be to function outside of it, and things are especially hard these days as we all know the JWs love a crisis like COVID to peddle their end of the world narrative

My mum is one, has been since before I was born (but only became one herself in adulthood), took me to meetings but it never appealed to me. I’m sure we all have stories of the disgusting cult like behaviour of some of their members, I thought we could support eachother as it’s a hard road to travel!

Preempting this as I would hate for anyone to be triggered by mentions of abuse so I’ve put a TW at the top of this post.

This is something I feel really strongly about, I never had support myself so I’d love to help others who are struggling.

 

[Dont swipe up!]

Found you!
Thank you

 

[ChampagneBox]

I literally can’t ask my mum anything these days about making plans (not now obvs but when restrictions were less!) because she answers with ‘yes if all being well” and I know she means ‘if Armageddon doesn’t come before then’ and it’s so frustrating! but because of my own doubts and anxieties there’s always the thought in the back of my mind ‘what if it does come?’ Doesn’t make for a very fun life

 

[Dont swipe up!]

I literally can’t ask my mum anything these days about making plans (not now obvs but when restrictions were less!) because she answers with ‘yes if all being well” and I know she means ‘if Armageddon doesn’t come before then’ and it’s so frustrating! but because of my own doubts and anxieties there’s always the thought in the back of my mind ‘what if it does come?’ Doesn’t make for a very fun life

It certainly doesn’t
My dad often drops me the watchtower and awake mags to have a read
The last one being about Covid and the government etc
Always in the back of my mind too
Worrying if we going to be ok
Worrying if I’m going to see my girls grow up
Sometimes I wish so much I didn’t grow up being one when I went to my dads every weekend as like you say it’s always in the back of your mind

 

[ChampagneBox]

It certainly doesn’t
My dad often drops me the watchtower and awake mags to have a read
The last one being about Covid and the government etc
Always in the back of my mind too
Worrying if we going to be ok
Worrying if I’m going to see my girls grow up
Sometimes I wish so much I didn’t grow up being one when I went to my dads every weekend as like you say it’s always in the back of your mind

Sometimes what helps me is knowing the magazines are written by people with no actual scientific knowledge, and if they do happen to have some it’s always going to be framed in their favour! Do you have a good relationship with your dad that you could tell him you don’t want the magazines anymore? X

 

[Dont swipe up!]

Sometimes what helps me is knowing the magazines are written by people with no actual scientific knowledge, and if they do happen to have some it’s always going to be framed in their favour! Do you have a good relationship with your dad that you could tell him you don’t want the magazines anymore? X

Yes I can tell him
But too be honest when I’m so anxious I like to read them to convince myself it’s all rubbish and that the world is ok
I dunno
I flicker from believing it to not
But guess that’s where it has been engrained

 

[Rockin' Robin]

I was in a relationship with a man who was a Jehovah's Witness. They seem to target vulnerable people to join their ranks. The man in question, was probably messed up before he joined the JWs, but they made his situation worse with their rules and rituals.
My intention is not to upset anyone, by writing about this, but I would advise caution when dealing with members of this religion.

 

[ChampagneBox]

I was in a relationship with a man who was a Jehovah's Witness. They seem to target vulnerable people to join their ranks. The man in question, was probably messed up before he joined the JWs, but they made his situation worse with their rules and rituals.
My intention is not to upset anyone, by writing about this, but I would advise caution when dealing with members of this religion.

Were you one too? How did you navigate being in a relationship with him? Did he guilt trip you into joining?

 

[Rockin' Robin]

Were you one too? How did you navigate being in a relationship with him? Did he guilt trip you into joining?

He never tried to get me to join the JWs. What he did do, was try to rush me into things like opening a joint bank account, and living with him. I should point out that I was seeing him at a point in his life, when he had left the JWs. But he wanted to rejoin, so he tried to rush me into a heavy relationship, so that he could appear to be respectable.
We did end up living together - for a heady two weeks! But I realised that it was a huge mistake. I'm glad I'm out of it to be honest.

 

[BigMavis]

Fascinating thread. So no Christmas or birthdays?
No heaven? I only discovered this from the what happens when you die thread. I'm sure the only cold callers with a religious angle I get are jehovas, seems many of them are young people from Canada who come to the UK to spread the word.

 

[ChampagneBox]

Fascinating thread. So no Christmas or birthdays?
No heaven? I only discovered this from the what happens when you die thread. I'm sure the only cold callers with a religious angle I get are jehovas, seems many of them are young people from Canada who come to the UK to spread the word.

I think the ones who come from America are Mormons, they knock on doors too!
No Christmas or birthdays But my dad isn’t a JW so I did still experience both in a way

 

[Base2019]

I also find this very interesting. I read somewhere that JW aren’t able to accept blood. Is that true? Sorry if that seems a strange or intrusive thing to ask you all, I just find it very intriguing in a non judgemental way. I think I find it so intriguing as I had to have a couple of transfusions this year and imagined the difficulty of having to pick between your religion and saving your life

 

[ChampagneBox]

I also find this very interesting. I read somewhere that JW aren’t able to accept blood. Is that true? Sorry if that seems a strange or intrusive thing to ask you all, I just find it very intriguing in a non judgemental way. I think I find it so intriguing as I had to have a couple of transfusions this year and imagined the difficulty of having to pick between your religion and saving your life

No it’s true! Although I believe nowadays with advances in tech/medicine there are different blood alternatives. I’m just glad if it came down to it my non JW dad would be able to let me have transfusions, whereas my mum always maintained she would refuse if it was solely up to her.

 

[Dont swipe up!]

I also find this very interesting. I read somewhere that JW aren’t able to accept blood. Is that true? Sorry if that seems a strange or intrusive thing to ask you all, I just find it very intriguing in a non judgemental way. I think I find it so intriguing as I had to have a couple of transfusions this year and imagined the difficulty of having to pick between your religion and saving your life

Yes this is 100% true
They carry a card around with them that says no blood
So you would have to die rather then have a blood transfusion to save your life
I never understood that
So my mum isn’t a Jw but my dad is and still is now
I went to my dads every weekend and went along to meetings and knocking on doors etc
But I still celebrated Xmas and birthdays as that’s the agreement my mum said that I could go to meetings
I used to get the mick taking out of me something chronic at school
Saying my dad didn’t love me as he didn’t buy me Xmas or birthday presents
They do have a present day on anniversary’s where the kids would get presents too
When I turned 16 I decided not to carry on as it didn’t interest me and didn’t go to my dads as much as I had a job etc and was growing up
My mum also said if I needed it I would have a blood transfusion if I needed it

 

[TJ90]

A man I work with was involved in a horrific car crash, thanks to blood transfusions, he survived - his parents have never spoken to him since because of this. They are JW’s, as an adult he stopped going to church etc and wasn’t a practicing JW so to speak so his wife agreed the transfusion

 

[HoGi]

I am married to an ex-JW (all his family are still JW) makes Christmas easy as no row about where we are spending the day and only my side to buy for!

In all seriousness his stepdad had an operable cancerous tumour but he bled so much at the biopsy stage that they said he would most definitely need a transfusion during surgery so he didn't go ahead with the operation. So now he is just waiting for the cancer to spread or get to the point it cripples him (it is near his spine)

We rarely see his mum/step dad or any of his siblings as we have very little in common and they are so clueless about the real world it is frustrating

 

[Base2019]

I am married to an ex-JW (all his family are still JW) makes Christmas easy as no row about where we are spending the day and only my side to buy for!

In all seriousness his stepdad had an operable cancerous tumour but he bled so much at the biopsy stage that they said he would most definitely need a transfusion during surgery so he didn't go ahead with the operation. So now he is just waiting for the cancer to spread or get to the point it cripples him (it is near his spine)

We rarely see his mum/step dad or any of his siblings as we have very little in common and they are so clueless about the real world it is frustrating

that makes me so sad that he refused the operation because of this I actually follow a girl online that had HL and she said she felt so uncomfortable having blood cancer in the JW community so much so that she went to all her appointments alone, obviously before covid ... she’s in her 20s, it’s heartbreaking.
I know you can get iron transfusions instead of blood transfusions but it’s crazy this day in age that people would refuse it, especially for something regarding cancer which is operable
Probably a stupid question, but why are JW against blood transfusions?

 

[Northeast1988]

This is a religious issue rather than a medical one. Both the Old and New Testaments clearly commands to abstain from blood.) Also, God views blood as representing life.) So they avoid taking blood not only in obedience to God but also out of respect for him as the Giver of life

 

[Base2019]

This is a religious issue rather than a medical one. Both the Old and New Testaments clearly commands to abstain from blood.) Also, God views blood as representing life.) So they avoid taking blood not only in obedience to God but also out of respect for him as the Giver of life

Thanks for explaining that for me

 

[HoGi]

that makes me so sad that he refused the operation because of this I actually follow a girl online that had HL and she said she felt so uncomfortable having blood cancer in the JW community so much so that she went to all her appointments alone, obviously before covid ... she’s in her 20s, it’s heartbreaking.
I know you can get iron transfusions instead of blood transfusions but it’s crazy this day in age that people would refuse it, especially for something regarding cancer which is operable
Probably a stupid question, but why are JW against blood transfusions?

Yeh the hospital were very clear it was completely operable in normal circumstances.

Instead he has had radiotherapy, that didn't do a lot except make him really sick and lose weight as it made his stomach so sore. So now it's a waiting game.