What a beautiful threat title! And exquisite artwork.
You’ve all been asking in my DMs so I thought I’d push another senseless money grab product and do a thread recrap. Since Leah is leaving us too I think we need to treat ourselves to a pub lunch.
In this weeks episode of Keeping Up With The Lardashians…
Unable to sublet the warehouse as an injectable space, our resident financial Miss Management realised she was about to be locked out. This hasn’t happened since she was a size 12. In a last ditch effort to clear it out before the repo man puts the padlocks on, she bagged up the last of her remaining wardrobe to donate to Brighton Salvos. She tells everyone it’s only because she’s moving in to consultancy. Apparently she misheard her account when they said ‘insolvency’.
A couple of bewdiful and well deserving people won stuff she was schilling and came to collect their prizes. I particularly loved the couple with the baby who won the cookware. They just about walked in on old mate in her g-banger from that time she was a size 8. Thankfully they missed the tit show because that would have ruined their sex lives forever.
Yo mamma was on again about the African sausage diet she’s been enjoying since she was a size 4. Harks back to the Cachia days when she showed excessive love for ye ole cocktail frankfurt. Look how that turned out. Leah asked her how she’s enjoying all that BBC. She responded by saying she doesn’t have much time for telly these days but does love to watch a little Kochie in the morning. Yet she still fellatiates a wrap.
We suspect all her weird arm poses are an old rotator cuff injury from getting down to some African beats. T doesn’t have the heart to tell her Africa isn’t a country and he actually hates dance music. He is, however, appreciating all the effort and is excited his lady friend is planning to invite Bob Geldof over for dinner. She’ll be sure to get the good plates out of the shed that night!
It’s been a year since ALove left us. He probably can’t handle her size 2 revenge body. Same reason Leah left. Time to get some new tempestuous headshits headshots and really make him jealous. Glad he didn’t get Miffy in the separation.
Now, pardon me while I excuse myself. I’m gonna tidy up my CV. I feel a job opportunity in the air! I can’t wait to be a couch potato in the gravy boat of life. Wouldn’t be the first time I had a LOUnatic for a boss. Thankfully Leah has cleaned everything up for me.
Don’t forget to drink some water my bewdiful communidy! Does wonders for the swelling.
. FFS she’s at the Booby Tape factory/headquarters and she talked about a bra 
