Pet death - Dealing with the inevitable

[Gembo]

The grieving process takes time. It's different for everyone. It's helps you feel close to her and that's ok. I kept my cats little casket in a wicker basket in my bedroom for a while. It contained her ashes and her favourite toys. Eventually I was able to move it when the time felt right. It meant I loved her no less but it felt ok. It's now in the bedroom next door tucked away safely. Whatever feels right for you is what matters. In time you may feel able to do that. Her little soul will still be close to you.

Thank you, yes I hope one day I kind of feel ok to move her, still somewhere close but I don’t feel ready yet, she really was my baby. I ended up on antidepressants after she passed it really did hit me hard so I understand everyone posting here. the love between a person and a pet is just so special.

@Lunamoon22 how you’re feeling is normal, I felt the same way leading up to my pets passing. I will be thinking of you

 

[MaxieMoo]

This lovely little thread has really choked me up tonight. Much love to everyone dealing with pet loss x

 

[Lunamoon22]

Aw thank you for the messages everyone, much love to you all.

Honestly I was so hesitant to post on here last night, but I’m so glad I did. I really do appreciate everyone sharing their stories and advice, and take comfort in knowing that how I’m feeling right now is what everyone else has gone through / is going through.

I spoke to mum earlier and we’ve all decided that we don’t want to put him through the trauma of having an operation - the tumour is in his leg and there was mention of a possibly amputation and it’s just something we can’t put him through. But we’ll see what the vet says tomorrow.

Animals are such amazing creatures and it’s sad that it feels like time has suddenly gone so fast. They really do bring so much happiness and joy to our lives dont they

 

[Facehugger]

Aw thank you for the messages everyone, much love to you all.

Honestly I was so hesitant to post on here last night, but I’m so glad I did. I really do appreciate everyone sharing their stories and advice, and take comfort in knowing that how I’m feeling right now is what everyone else has gone through / is going through.

I spoke to mum earlier and we’ve all decided that we don’t want to put him through the trauma of having an operation - the tumour is in his leg and there was mention of a possibly amputation and it’s just something we can’t put him through. But we’ll see what the vet says tomorrow.

Animals are such amazing creatures and it’s sad that it feels like time has suddenly gone so fast. They really do bring so much happiness and joy to our lives dont they

Thanks for posting the thread, and for sharing how you're feeling, so many people who are not animal lovers don't understand how hard it is. Think it helps everyone who has lost a much loved furry friend to share their stories with others who have gone through the same sometimes.

The one thing about animals is their love is unconditional and constant, and all they ask is to be safe, warm, fed and cared for.

Let us know what tomorrow brings & take care xx

 

[Facehugger]

Giving this a bump up for @Lunamoon22. Hope you're ok today? x

 

[Lunamoon22]

Giving this a bump up for @Lunamoon22. Hope you're ok today? x

I'm ok, I think... The vet said they need to do an x-ray this week to see what's going on in the leg and also said they have to check his chest to see if there's been any spread - but he hasn't been wheezing or coughing or anything, so hopefully it hasn't.

I think we're pretty certain that we wouldn't want to go down the amputation route, I dunno if it's strange saying this but I can't bare the thought of him leaving leaving this world not 'whole'.... if that makes sense... It just wouldn't be him, and it would break my heart seeing him so different after all these yesrs, I just don't think he'd recover from such a change in his life either.

So now just got to wait and see just what we're dealing with.

 

[Facehugger]

Bless you, at least it sounds like they are being very thorough before they decide anything, and if you are all certain that you know what you want to do and what's best for him if indeed the worst does come to the worst, you can't do any more for now X I think in a young dog, they'd adapt to 3 legs but I know what you mean, I'd be the same I reckon. Pleased you're managing to cope with it all tho hard as it is

 

[Lunamoon22]

Bless you, at least it sounds like they are being very thorough before they decide anything, and if you are all certain that you know what you want to do and what's best for him if indeed the worst does come to the worst, you can't do any more for now X I think in a young dog, they'd adapt to 3 legs but I know what you mean, I'd be the same I reckon. Pleased you're managing to cope with it all tho hard as it is

Yes totally, if he was a bit younger it would have been easier to go through all that. He seems happy hopping along, he does use his foot every now and again.

We're pretty confident that he isn't in any pain with it at the moment though, he's always been very clear in communicating when he's hurt - he's quite a wussy dog really, I remember when we adopted the second family dog the first thing she did was accidently step on his paw and he shrieked and started limping for a couple of steps until he realised he was actually ok Ugh, thinking of all his funny silly moments is making me blub again.

 

[dressagediva]

This is a lovely thread. Pets are so special and it's nice to hear others find their deaths just as hard as I always do.

I've had a pretty rough year losing my 31-year-old mare Poppy, who has been part of my life for so long that I now have to learn how to live without her with no real memory of life before her. She was truly the perfect horse and the best friend I could have asked for. Just after she went, my 9-year-old collie started to deteriorate and unfortunately we had to have him PTS too, way before his time but he was a rescue with very sad inbreeding issues so the vet said we were lucky to have him reach 9.

What keeps me going whenever I lose a pet is the knowledge that I did the best I could to give them the perfect life, and all the joy they brought me over the years. It's harder than losing family in a way, as you are responsible 100% for their life, wellbeing and death. Not an easy thing to process. Take it easy on yourself <3

 

[Facehugger]

This is a lovely thread. Pets are so special and it's nice to hear others find their deaths just as hard as I always do.

I've had a pretty rough year losing my 31-year-old mare Poppy, who has been part of my life for so long that I now have to learn how to live without her with no real memory of life before her. She was truly the perfect horse and the best friend I could have asked for. Just after she went, my 9-year-old collie started to deteriorate and unfortunately we had to have him PTS too, way before his time but he was a rescue with very sad inbreeding issues so the vet said we were lucky to have him reach 9.

What keeps me going whenever I lose a pet is the knowledge that I did the best I could to give them the perfect life, and all the joy they brought me over the years. It's harder than losing family in a way, as you are responsible 100% for their life, wellbeing and death. Not an easy thing to process. Take it easy on yourself <3

You can have a hug just for being a caring animal lover too I'm pleased Luna started this thread, it's like you say, nice for people to chat to others who've gone through the same x

 

[Lunamoon22]

Just a little update... He has his x-ray today, the tumor is eating away at his leg bone, it doesn't look like it's spread to his chest.

They've taken a needle biopsy and are testing to see if it's aggressive. He's feeling very sorry for himself at the moment, I imagine he's feeling very sore from being pulled about for the x-ray.

We're all taking things a day at a time.

It's so hard to mentally battle the selfishness Vs kindness thoughts. The selfishness of wanting him to stay with us for as long as possible (which will mean putting him through the amputation) Vs the thoughts that the kindest thing to do would be not to put him through all that if that makes sense.

 

[MaxieMoo]

Just a little update... He has his x-ray today, the tumor is eating away at his leg bone, it doesn't look like it's spread to his chest.

They've taken a needle biopsy and are testing to see if it's aggressive. He's feeling very sorry for himself at the moment, I imagine he's feeling very sore from being pulled about for the x-ray.

We're all taking things a day at a time.

It's so hard to mentally battle the selfishness Vs kindness thoughts. The selfishness of wanting him to stay with us for as long as possible (which will mean putting him through the amputation) Vs the thoughts that the kindest thing to do would be not to put him through all that if that makes sense.

Bless you Luna. Whatever decision you make will be made with love x

 

[Upintheair83]

Just a little update... He has his x-ray today, the tumor is eating away at his leg bone, it doesn't look like it's spread to his chest.

They've taken a needle biopsy and are testing to see if it's aggressive. He's feeling very sorry for himself at the moment, I imagine he's feeling very sore from being pulled about for the x-ray.

We're all taking things a day at a time.

It's so hard to mentally battle the selfishness Vs kindness thoughts. The selfishness of wanting him to stay with us for as long as possible (which will mean putting him through the amputation) Vs the thoughts that the kindest thing to do would be not to put him through all that if that makes sense.

Wish I could give you the biggest hug and make things right for you. This thread is so lovely, it’s very hard when people don’t understand the love and bond we have with our pets. They are family and rely on us entirely.
Thinking about you all the time, and hoping you are ok that he’s not in any pain. Xxx

 

[openbook1]

Aw thank you for the messages everyone, much love to you all.

Honestly I was so hesitant to post on here last night, but I’m so glad I did. I really do appreciate everyone sharing their stories and advice, and take comfort in knowing that how I’m feeling right now is what everyone else has gone through / is going through.

I spoke to mum earlier and we’ve all decided that we don’t want to put him through the trauma of having an operation - the tumour is in his leg and there was mention of a possibly amputation and it’s just something we can’t put him through. But we’ll see what the vet says tomorrow.

Animals are such amazing creatures and it’s sad that it feels like time has suddenly gone so fast. They really do bring so much happiness and joy to our lives dont they

I am not sure if it is an option where you live but here there are vets that come to your house and put your animal to "sleep" there. Some people prefer it as their animal is in their own calming environment, on their own bed and not distressed. They also let you spend as much time as you want with your pet before doing it.
The saddest article I ever read before was from a vet who said the worst part of their job was when an owner would take their pet to be put to sleep, sometimes the owner wouldn't want to be in the same room and the animal would start panicking and looking for them . So never go out of the room, be there for your sweet pets.

 

[Trixabellee9393]

Hey I’m kind of feeling like this but in a different way. My cat was attacked by a fox around a month back and broke his leg he had a vets stay and operation and has to be on cage rest for a while. I was obviously complelty in love with him before but I’m literally obsessed with him now and thinkin about what has happened to him makes me well up it’s really affected me for some reason. I can’t leave him alone for like two minutes now and always fuss him and wrap him in blankets . Maybe I just feel sorry for him or something but yeah what I’m saying is... pets really pull on our heart strings. Most people adore their pets so it’s normal how U feel. I dread losing one of mine I would be in bits for weeks I think xxx

 

[Lunamoon22]

I am not sure if it is an option where you live but here there are vets that come to your house and put your animal to "sleep" there. Some people prefer it as their animal is in their own calming environment, on their own bed and not distressed. They also let you spend as much time as you want with your pet before doing it.
The saddest article I ever read before was from a vet who said the worst part of their job was when an owner would take their pet to be put to sleep, sometimes the owner wouldn't want to be in the same room and the animal would start panicking and looking for them . So never go out of the room, be there for your sweet pets.

I'm not sure if that's an option, I'll ask mum and see if it's something to think about. Our boy is always so nervous when going to the vets, it would make it even harder to see him so anxious when the time comes...

Oh gosh that is so sad, it's such a difficult thing I'm in bits just imagining being there and witnessing his passing but then I really wouldn't want him to be alone and left with strangers. It's such a difficult thing...

Hey I’m kind of feeling like this but in a different way. My cat was attacked by a fox around a month back and broke his leg he had a vets stay and operation and has to be on cage rest for a while. I was obviously complelty in love with him before but I’m literally obsessed with him now and thinkin about what has happened to him makes me well up it’s really affected me for some reason. I can’t leave him alone for like two minutes now and always fuss him and wrap him in blankets . Maybe I just feel sorry for him or something but yeah what I’m saying is... pets really pull on our heart strings. Most people adore their pets so it’s normal how U feel. I dread losing one of mine I would be in bits for weeks I think xxx

Oh poor thing! I hope he is recovering well. I think it's natural to overly fuss when they're not well, I know I go into super nurturing motherly mode. They really are special little beings. Wishing yours a speedy recovery

 

[Charsior]

I had to have my childhood pony of 17 years down a few weeks ago, and I still cant believe its happened. I still have my other old boy and my mums horse but my little pony was before these two and my old boys best mate. They were little and large. He got really poorly and developed a large cancerous mass in his head which crushed his throat and was slowing stopping him eating and breathing. I was really unsure if I wanted to be there when we decided to call it a day. He got to spend some time in the field with the boys and then a few of us fused him. My mum and my sister held him and said goodbye to him. I waited until he was gone to go see him. It still haunts me and writing this has me in tears. for 17 years I saw him almost every day. he was the coolest dude ever.

 

[Gembo]

I had to have my childhood pony of 17 years down a few weeks ago, and I still cant believe its happened. I still have my other old boy and my mums horse but my little pony was before these two and my old boys best mate. They were little and large. He got really poorly and developed a large cancerous mass in his head which crushed his throat and was slowing stopping him eating and breathing. I was really unsure if I wanted to be there when we decided to call it a day. He got to spend some time in the field with the boys and then a few of us fused him. My mum and my sister held him and said goodbye to him. I waited until he was gone to go see him. It still haunts me and writing this has me in tears. for 17 years I saw him almost every day. he was the coolest dude ever.

I’m truly sorry for your loss

 

[Facehugger]

Just thought I'd pop in to see how everyone is doing, with some love and hugs for anyone needing some you're all brave for sharing your stories and thoughts, however upsetting they might be and I'm pleased this thread is still going for all to come to, if they need some support xx

Just to answer a question too, most vets will come to do a home visit when the time comes if you'd prefer that, it costs an extra charge but we'll worth it. That's what my son did with our old cat. The vet came after surgery finished, had a coffee and a cuddle, she let son take his time saying his goodbyes and she'd have stayed as long as he'd wanted she was here nearly 2 hours anyway.

If your vet doesn't do home visits then register with another one that does, explain the issue, they'll come out. Xx

 

[OutrageouslyScarlet]

I lost my boxer girl last year aged 10, she went from a totally crazy very healthy dog to a super poorly pup within 6 months. She had a brain tumour. My only advice would be the obvious , make the most of your pup. Someone came and took some professional pics for me. We did some bucket list things. I’d make her a cooked breakfast whilst we ate one. McDonald’s stuff she’d never usually have. I live by the beach so lots of swims with her Mumma (me)
We let the vet keep a close eye on her so because I never wanted her to be in pain. When the time very heartbreakingly came the vet came to our house. Sedated her so she was calm and I held her paw. They honestly break your heart. But it’s worth every minute. Thinking of you.