Totally agree. All boils down to just not being interested enough.
Dating in Lockdown #2 The audacity of men
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Reading all these experiences makes me nervous because I feel like I am talking to a good guy but maybe I'm misreading the situation!
How do you really know then if they are interested and it's more than just until they get sex and move on?
I go off vibes and actions but idk now
planted so much self doubt in me
How do you really know then if they are interested and it's more than just until they get sex and move on?
I go off vibes and actions but idk now
planted so much self doubt in me
I completely agree. It’s Also this!! Like I said just his take on the matter. and he was an absolute playboy, all his mates too. One of his friends quite a famous DJ still on the playboy ways and I feel bad for all the girls he’s strung along too. my friend is now all settled down but plays the agony aunt 
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. I’m off the apps for the entire month anyway had one of the best weekends just being out with friends in London. Just felt so nice
OmgI've never been in a relationship, so I when I meet guys it's for one thing, I'll give you a clue, it's not their first leg and it's not their second leg.
I once met a guy from Fab. His profile said he was 45, which is waaay much older than what I was looking for but he looked ok in his pics. He got to my house, he looked about 75!I couldn't go through with it. I made an excuse and I chose a really obvious excuse because I was kind of angry that he'd lied to me, so I wasn't really worried about offending him.
I met another guy who came over and I was performing an act on him and I'd just eaten a big meal, so I will leave it to your imagination what was happening. I asked him if I minded if it got messy as I wanted to carry on and he said he didn't mind so I carried on doing what I was doing to him and his jeans got messy. He got really angry and said "I didn't mean do it on my ******* jeans." His Jeans were literally below my mouth, so what did he expect would happen? He stormed off out of my house and he's not been back since.
Most guys are great though. I've met some fun, adventurous and lovely guys. I'm not here to slate all men. I love men.
Some things that niggle at me though are guys with no profile pictures asking if I have any pics when I clearly have a profile picture and they don't. And men who offer to send me a picture and I say yes please and they then ask me to send them one first. To me that is like presenting a gift to someone holding it out and saying you're not going to hand it over unless you give them a gift first. Seems like a con to me.
I also see some other women treat men like dirt and that really angers me. Respect works both ways.
that jeans story is bringing back memories of The Banned Thread. I miss it!
A lot of people will say “if they like you, you’ll know, if they don’t you’ll be confused”...
And honestly I could not agree less with that statement!! Doesn’t account for love bombing etc which is really common on apps. Ive also had guys absolutely crazy about me for 2/3 months, then out of the blue it’s like a switch flicks and he’s a different person. I think ultimately time will tell, wait and see, and don’t get too deep in the early months.
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Unfortunately, there is no way of really knowing what you’re dealing with and what someone’s true intentions are until something bad happens (or doesn’t happen as the case may be).
So few men are upfront and honest about the fact that they only want sex. Many of them will give the game away early on if you know what red flags to look out for, but others are more crafty. Or they want The Girlfriend Experience for a few weeks / months, then when it comes down to having “the conversation”, they scarper.
My first experience on an app was Tinder and I was so painfully naive about how manipulative men could be. I learned some very hard lessons very early on but now I’m extra careful about not getting ahead of myself too quickly and keeping in mind that the nature of apps means that we’re all likely to be talking to / dating more than one person simultaneously until someone says otherwise. I don’t ever assume that there’s no one else on the scene or think that one good date means exclusivity. So far, that attitude has served me well but it’s hard out there, that’s for sure
So few men are upfront and honest about the fact that they only want sex. Many of them will give the game away early on if you know what red flags to look out for, but others are more crafty. Or they want The Girlfriend Experience for a few weeks / months, then when it comes down to having “the conversation”, they scarper.
My first experience on an app was Tinder and I was so painfully naive about how manipulative men could be. I learned some very hard lessons very early on but now I’m extra careful about not getting ahead of myself too quickly and keeping in mind that the nature of apps means that we’re all likely to be talking to / dating more than one person simultaneously until someone says otherwise. I don’t ever assume that there’s no one else on the scene or think that one good date means exclusivity. So far, that attitude has served me well but it’s hard out there, that’s for sure
I do believe there is a lot of truth in this, but you can't account for every single situation. A see a lot of woman playing CSI and trying to piece evidence together about whether a bloke is interested and getting increasingly confused, upset and frustrated by his actions, or lack of them.
I do think you will know when a man is interested, but it doesn't necessarily mean this initial spark/interest/attraction will turn into something long-term unfortunately.
I used to believe it wholeheartedly, but I am now much more cynical
I don’t ever recommend playing detective, nothing good ever comes from that and social media is rife with misunderstandings. Judge a guy on his actions with you, not his words is the best advice I have.
I’m not even going to think about going back on the apps until I lose this lockdown podge 
I want to share some advices I have learned along the way, with a few years of online dating (and a few met in real life as well)!
When a guy swipe a girl online and goes on a date, there are only 2 categories for him:
1) girl kind of pretty or really hot, but I'm not really interested => interest in sex only
2) girl kind of pretty or really hot, but super cool, seems nice and interesting, fun => i want to see her again, also I want to have sex with her.
There are no categories for : dream girl, future wife, mother of my kids, that only starts with the girls from the 2nd category after some time dating.
So if we want a boyfriend we need to be in the second category and DELAY sex a bit!!
Sex too early, or even sexfriends situations where we catch the feelings and hope he changes his mind are very tricky. A relationship can derive from this but let's not hope too much for this one. Also if it does happen, it's sometimes after a period of no contact where he realizes he misses the girl.
(PS: this is not slutshaming at all I've done it plenty of time, but it ended up with a lot of sexfriends or ghosting situation...)
For guys who stop engaging (period or after sex):
NO CONTACT = they (always to often) come back
I had sex with a 42-year-old hot fuckboy few weeks ago, I made it clear his lifestyle with women was not appealing to me and I was only interested in sex and didn't like him, after sex he stopped texting, well I always applied NO CONTACT and now he messages me often! he wants to see me again. He also messages me about random things about his life, like "I bought a bicycle etc". I am adamant that if I had had a tiny crush on him and wanted him to text he he wouldn't. I must be one of the few who didn't long after him and that was attractive for him (because he does look really good). He told me some women were "in love" with him for 1 year, 2 years sexfriends situations waiting for him to change his mind and commit and he never did.
Basically, make them wait, and no contact are great weapons.
Also after breakups: your best bet (to heal faster or get him back) is a very strict NO Contact policy.
When a guy swipe a girl online and goes on a date, there are only 2 categories for him:
1) girl kind of pretty or really hot, but I'm not really interested => interest in sex only
2) girl kind of pretty or really hot, but super cool, seems nice and interesting, fun => i want to see her again, also I want to have sex with her.
There are no categories for : dream girl, future wife, mother of my kids, that only starts with the girls from the 2nd category after some time dating.
So if we want a boyfriend we need to be in the second category and DELAY sex a bit!!
Sex too early, or even sexfriends situations where we catch the feelings and hope he changes his mind are very tricky. A relationship can derive from this but let's not hope too much for this one. Also if it does happen, it's sometimes after a period of no contact where he realizes he misses the girl.
(PS: this is not slutshaming at all I've done it plenty of time, but it ended up with a lot of sexfriends or ghosting situation...)
For guys who stop engaging (period or after sex):
NO CONTACT = they (always to often) come back
I had sex with a 42-year-old hot fuckboy few weeks ago, I made it clear his lifestyle with women was not appealing to me and I was only interested in sex and didn't like him, after sex he stopped texting, well I always applied NO CONTACT and now he messages me often! he wants to see me again. He also messages me about random things about his life, like "I bought a bicycle etc". I am adamant that if I had had a tiny crush on him and wanted him to text he he wouldn't. I must be one of the few who didn't long after him and that was attractive for him (because he does look really good). He told me some women were "in love" with him for 1 year, 2 years sexfriends situations waiting for him to change his mind and commit and he never did.
Basically, make them wait, and no contact are great weapons.
Also after breakups: your best bet (to heal faster or get him back) is a very strict NO Contact policy.
Spot on.
I was talking to someone on and off for two years, then had sex with them a few months ago and they ghosted me and we haven’t spoken since! In a way I did have the inkling that it may happen, I should’ve trusted my gut but because I already had the inkling it prepared me and I wasn’t affected by it emotionally. I say always expect the worst from men 
Oh, I'm not even talking about playing detective on social media. I had this ridiculous crush on a bloke from work years ago and was constantly looking for clues to confirm he was into me. He fancied me a bit but not enough to do anything about it, but I drove myself nuts in the process of trying to figure it outI used to believe it wholeheartedly, but I am now much more cynical
I don’t ever recommend playing detective, nothing good ever comes from that and social media is rife with misunderstandings. Judge a guy on his actions with you, not his words is the best advice I have.
I think I need to stick to the lighthearted threads.. No good for an over thinker over here
This is exactly how I feel hahaI think I need to stick to the lighthearted threads.. No good for an over thinker over here
Give myself anxiety over nothing
Just gonna leave this here
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How far is everyone’s distance set? Just realised bumbles auto set mine to 50m, I can’t be fucked with that
About 40 miles, I don’t mind travelling for a decent guy, it’s that bad nowHow far is everyone’s distance set? Just realised bumbles auto set mine to 50m, I can’t be fucked with that
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