Daft things your parents used to say to you as a kid

[Sancrow]

'If you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry about'
'I'm I talking Chinese'
'Put a sock in it'
'Do I look stupid'

Also a thing my nan used to say when a car went past going fast 'they are not going to get there any quicker going that fast'

 

[AlanBanan]

“don’t put hot teabags in the bin, it’ll set it on fire”

I didn’t realise they were just saying that so the bag didn’t leak or stink of rotten teabags, until I was around 14 and said it out loud to someone.

 

[bunnyboo]

If my mam or grandmother thought I was fibbing about something, they'd tell me to stick out my tongue and they'd go "Oh look, there's a black spot on your tongue. You're not telling the truth!"

It's actually an excellent interrogation tactic because I'd usually crumble under pressure or admit to something else they didn't know about I wonder if the FBI have heard of these Irish mammy tactics lmao

 

[emm]

whenever we were slouching at the table while eating my Catholic grandma would say "sit up like a christian" . I was quite young at the time, I always wish I had asked her wtf that meant, do other religions just slouch?

 

[Libbylulu]

You two will kill each other and then you’ll be happy - when my brother and I used to fight

If nobody’s watching the tv put it off or it will go on fire

The reindeers have gone on strike - when everyone was striking in the 70’s

you’ll catch pneumonia if you go to bed with your hair wet

 

[Mememe9]

I am going to the cottage homes in a children’s home

 

[Libbylulu]

Eat your crusts if you want curly hair

@bunnyboo my parents told me that too and I also caught my children out on a few fibs with it too

 

[watermelon sugar]

My Mum used to tell me it was illegal to eat pancakes any other day but Pancake day when I’d ask for pancakes but really she was too lazy

 

[Jen667]

'Mum, I've lost my school bag.'

'Where did you put it?'

 

[emm]

Eat your crusts if you want curly hair

@bunnyboo my parents told me that too and I also caught my children out on a few fibs with it too

I remember a teaching telling someone that during lunch at school. Her reply was simply “but I don’t want curly hair”

 

[Snippysnips]

If you don't stop crying ill give you somthing to cry about

Would you look at the dirt on the back of your neck

Keep doing that with your face an it will stick like that

Were you raised in a barn (on leaving doors open)

If you keep misbehaving your going to Maggie Murphys

If you don't clean up am coming in there with a black bag

And probably a ton more lol

 

[Zenchick101]

Don't complain that boys don't like you if you eat chocolate/get fat
if you swallow a seed you'll grow a plant in your stomach.

 

[mochibean]

If I was pulling a face my mum would always say 'if the wind blows it'll stay like that'. Never really got that

 

[Kaylon8083]

If you watch TV all day, you’ll get square eyes .

On a trip to the beach and I was whining because I was hungry: “We’re eating the sandwiches on the beach - that’s why they’re called sandwiches. If we were meant to eat them on the road - they’d be called roadwiches.

If we stood in front of the TV: “You make a very good door but not a good window”

Whenever I made myself a cup of tea and didn’t offer one to everyone else: “What is this - St Jack’s Day? Make everyone one please”

You’ve got enough dirt in your ears to grow potatoes.

If I ever dressed scruffy, I was told that I looked like a sack of potatoes/poo.

Were you born in a barn? That one every time we left the door open.

 

[lastdis]

Leave one light on. - it’s like Blackpool illuminations in here

 

[gossipboi]

If you put the light on in the backseat of the car we’re all gonna die!

 

[Ekathrina]

I was brought up by my grandparents and my gran had some corkers.
“Queer as Dicks hat band” - this meant someone who was awkward, out of sorts or just plain weird. Apparently it’s a reference to the son of Oliver Cromwell, for whom the crown of England was not a good fit.
“It’s a bit black over Bills mother’s” - storm clouds coming in from the East, something to do with Kaiser Bill.
“Like Piffy on a rock bun” - waiting round aimlessly, I use this one a lot when I’m waiting for a delivery!
Another favourite was if I asked what was for tea she’d say “Three jumps to t’pantry door, and a bite of t’knob” or “bread and pull-it”.
The older I get the more I find myself coming out with these little idioms to my own kids. Ironically, of course - well that’s what I keep telling myself!

 

[Blowup80]

When asking what was for tea "tit with sugar on"
If not wearing a coat "you'll get a chill on your kidneys then you'll be sorry"
If I shouted of my mam and she couldn't be bothered "I've ran away with a black man" . Bear in mind it was the 80's!

 

[37BBL]

If I ever had a splinter and wouldn't let my parwnts get it out, my mums said I would have to get my finger chopped off went to bed one night petrified my finger would need to be amputated!

 

[Kaylon8083]

I’ve just thought of some more from both my mum and gran.

Whenever I asked what was for dinner, they’d reply “Bread and point”

If we kept coming in and out of a room, we’d be told “It’s like Piccadilly Circus in here”

My dad used to moan if we left lights on saying the house was like Blackpool illuminations.

If I coughed, my mum and/or gran would ask “Has it got bones in it?”