I really don’t mean to be mean or step oot side ma Lane but surely if all the maws fae near enough every scheme in Scotland are making wax melts etc it cany be that hard or top secret?!
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Thumb up like his buddy.
He thinks he's some kind of Parisian perfumer, twonk.
He thinks he's some kind of Parisian perfumer, twonk.
Yeah that's what I meant, sounds like him. Definitely leads a totally different life.Johnny seems the polar opposite to boring Maz. He's living his best life, thriving career, friends and a fabulous partner, beautiful new home. He's treaded the boards on many theatre stages. He's always smiling and seems great company. You're right though, this whiney voice he's doing is exactly like moan-a-lot Maz
Ffs Mario. Give it up you delusional twit. They'll never, or ever be quality fragrances like Chanel or YSL.
It's cheap and tacky just like yourself
It's cheap and tacky just like yourself
Exclusive image of Martin using his lash fan.
Wee Deek would be better aff wi a girlfriend and a strap on, less high maintenance and a bigger
tae Martin's 
Wee Deek would be better aff wi a girlfriend and a strap on, less high maintenance and a bigger
tae Martin's 
So hang on a second the dots of doom were all about how Marion absolutely couldn’t story in front of anyone, not even Derek! Que this afternoon that snooter is sniffing all the amazing scents 
and lo and behold Marion full on Storying will Derek! He’s the biggest billy bull shitter going!!!
and lo and behold Marion full on Storying will Derek! He’s the biggest billy bull shitter going!!!
As illiterate as ever 
Flashback to when he literally had to learn to sign his name for avamay.
What on earth is Hannah thinking for her "brand" getting a cuppla skanky scheme rats to pick wholesale off the shelf oils, I really thought she'd bin him after that Ali express cube and him spilling his stinking guts about her bankruptcy, but we move (no ma quote) I'm hoping she has a plan to maybe bring him down a peg or two and she's just playing the long game. Hannah hen 
if you read here please drop the skanky bleep from a very high height ma lovely 
if you read here please drop the skanky bleep from a very high height ma lovely Look at him and his trout pout. He makes it so obvious 
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
Bedtime, before 8pm.
Alrighty then….
Alrighty then….
He said he’d b back on Sunday he bleeping wasny kidden soon as the bleep opened his eyes that was him
I can't get my head round the confidence this idiot has, he is a vile nasty bawbag inside and outLook at him and his trout pout. He makes it so obvious
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
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Looks like he’s had more lip filler to me 
or it could be the filter….
or it could be the filter….
bleeping hell the size of that Beak!!! It’s masshoov , you could break rocks with that beastLook at him and his trout pout. He makes it so obvious
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
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Bed before 8.. my toddler is still up.
Is that no his couch anaw?Look at him and his trout pout. He makes it so obvious
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
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Wonder if Marion realises his pronounced proboscis will appear to be an even more humongous hooter in a few years "In 2010, researchers at the University of Milan calculated that the total surface area of older people’s noses (65-80 years old) is typically 15 per cent larger than that of younger people’s (18-30 years old)." Let the Rhinoplasty begging begin ......Look at him and his trout pout. He makes it so obvious
Hate to break it to you Maz, but your nose is the thing people see first
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bleeping hell, this bleep doesn’t half think she’s something special doesn’t she! Talk about delusions of grandeur. Back in your box Martin.
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Caught up with the dots of doom….
Does Martin no just LOVE everything?
A 4 year old cleaning account telling us products have multiple uses…… and off the top of his head could think of …… two, so reads the back of the bottle
The patronising well done Sophie, she don’t need your fake praise I can assure you
WTF is that music?
‘Remember me this way’
That no filter filter is doing zero for ya btw hen
Oh now we are being treatit to a behind the scenes wow just like being at universal studios so it is
Him and deek sat on the floor surrounded by dirty tissues sampling scents, ‘this is how your supposed to smell them’ erm what? and I’m surprised Hannah works with him after he kicked her when she was down, there was no birthday gift or shout out, weird.
Does Martin no just LOVE everything?
A 4 year old cleaning account telling us products have multiple uses…… and off the top of his head could think of …… two, so reads the back of the bottle
The patronising well done Sophie, she don’t need your fake praise I can assure you
WTF is that music?
‘Remember me this way’
That no filter filter is doing zero for ya btw hen
Oh now we are being treatit to a behind the scenes wow just like being at universal studios so it is
Him and deek sat on the floor surrounded by dirty tissues sampling scents, ‘this is how your supposed to smell them’ erm what? and I’m surprised Hannah works with him after he kicked her when she was down, there was no birthday gift or shout out, weird.
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