Candice Brathwaite #2

[heretoreaditall2019]

It was a bit of a strange story, it was in a chapter about finances and why managing money is harder for black people. The bugaboo bit was explained by saying black women need to work extra hard to appear presentable or like good mothers, so she needed to have the buggy as a status symbol. Even if they had to skip meals to pay for it. There was a whole bit where she feels the seller was racist towards her which was clearer to understand.

I don’t think there’s anything that unusual about buying things secondhand, and have brought quite a few things for my baby on Facebook marketplace. Maybe I’m just cheap

Also, the recording is 5 hours long which seems surprisingly short. It must be a very slim paperback.

I can kind of understand what she’s saying but where she is so unlikeable I dread to think how she’s presenting it. It’s like class security isn’t it, when you have money you don’t care about these things as much because you have the other markers of security / comfort, when you don’t it means a lot more as you’re yearning for it?

I’m not going to explain this well but I get it having grown up WC and poor, and chubby, I always feel the need to be very well put together because I don’t want to appear that way as an adult, even though I’m now living a solidly upper mc lifestyle (through work not parents lol), and not chubs. Even plus size bloggers talk about it, like skinny girls can get away with the athleisure scruffy waif look and chuck anything on and be deemed naturally stylish whereas they have to do lots of performative femininity to even be treated nicely, a fat girl in joggers is looked down on.

HOWEVER I hope she’s not made women feel any which way about buying second hand. Also I find it ridiculous for her to be making these points when it’s HER bread and butter to program these insecurities into women to get them to buy buy buy using her aff links? You can’t be about that action and also profiting from the problem?

 

[Roarquaver]

I can kind of understand what she’s saying but where she is so unlikeable I dread to think how she’s presenting it. It’s like class security isn’t it, when you have money you don’t care about these things as much because you have the other markers of security / comfort, when you don’t it means a lot more as you’re yearning for it?

I’m not going to explain this well but I get it having grown up WC and poor, and chubby, I always feel the need to be very well put together because I don’t want to appear that way as an adult, even though I’m now living a solidly upper mc lifestyle (through work not parents lol), and not chubs. Even plus size bloggers talk about it, like skinny girls can get away with the athleisure scruffy waif look and chuck anything on and be deemed naturally stylish whereas they have to do lots of performative femininity to even be treated nicely, a fat girl in joggers is looked down on.

HOWEVER I hope she’s not made women feel any which way about buying second hand. Also I find it ridiculous for her to be making these points when it’s HER bread and butter to program these insecurities into women to get them to buy buy buy using her aff links? You can’t be about that action and also profiting from the problem?

You're so right about the last point. It's hypocritical of anyone to make their living promoting a certain lifestyle while also moaning they felt like tit when they couldn't afford that lifestyle.

 

[AfroCircus]

I can kind of understand what she’s saying but where she is so unlikeable I dread to think how she’s presenting it. It’s like class security isn’t it, when you have money you don’t care about these things as much because you have the other markers of security / comfort, when you don’t it means a lot more as you’re yearning for it?

I’m not going to explain this well but I get it having grown up WC and poor, and chubby, I always feel the need to be very well put together because I don’t want to appear that way as an adult, even though I’m now living a solidly upper mc lifestyle (through work not parents lol), and not chubs. Even plus size bloggers talk about it, like skinny girls can get away with the athleisure scruffy waif look and chuck anything on and be deemed naturally stylish whereas they have to do lots of performative femininity to even be treated nicely, a fat girl in joggers is looked down on.

HOWEVER I hope she’s not made women feel any which way about buying second hand. Also I find it ridiculous for her to be making these points when it’s HER bread and butter to program these insecurities into women to get them to buy buy buy using her aff links? You can’t be about that action and also profiting from the problem?

I also grew up poor and now relatively middle class so understand what you are saying.

On the point of casual clothing, I’ve often thought that whilst I can slob about in some old leggings and a hoody in Tesco and have no one bat an eyelid, if I was a black man dressed similarly the response would be different. So I don’t disagree with the premise of what CB is saying, like you said it also applies in other context.

Well, she said she had to buy the bugaboo because Mumsnet said it was the best I find it really hard to believe you could be that influenced by an anonymous forum, and Instagram is actually the only place I regularly see bugaboos. I use Instagram responsibly now and don’t really feel subject to influencer pressure, but a couple of years ago someone I really admired on Instagram had their first baby and did the whole classic bugaboo / snuz pod / sleepyhead product avalanche. At the time I remember feeling like I would need these things too. She later admitted she didn’t get on well with the pram

Perhaps CB didn’t want to say this as this is now her job essentially?

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

You're so right about the last point. It's hypocritical of anyone to make their living promoting a certain lifestyle while also moaning they felt like tit when they couldn't afford that lifestyle.

Yes!! I think that’s why I’ve never been able to root for her at all, she thinks it’s radical to be included / have a seat at the table in these oppressive systems. Clearly because she can make some money out of it. It’d be far more radical to dismantle them and free women from the expectation / burden of white insta mamahood rather than joining in. Moreover, she’s joining in for WHAT gain? She’s not getting the big ££ deals, she’s making pennies relative to the middle class white women in nice big houses which nice wardrobes, it’s actually embarrassing to be serving a system that doesn’t serve you.

 

[Youngmum29]

I'm all for calling out Candice for her inarticulate dribble and obsession with money. But be careful with what you say. Unfortunately these issues ARE the "be all and end all of life". At least to POC. Demonstrated by what is happening in the US just this week.

I completely agree with what you’ve said. I’m not trying to take anything away from what’s going on right now. I stand fully behind the protests. I shouldn’t have worded it like that. I apologise.

 

[Pain of chocolate]

I can kind of understand what she’s saying but where she is so unlikeable I dread to think how she’s presenting it. It’s like class security isn’t it, when you have money you don’t care about these things as much because you have the other markers of security / comfort, when you don’t it means a lot more as you’re yearning for it?

I’m not going to explain this well but I get it having grown up WC and poor, and chubby, I always feel the need to be very well put together because I don’t want to appear that way as an adult, even though I’m now living a solidly upper mc lifestyle (through work not parents lol), and not chubs. Even plus size bloggers talk about it, like skinny girls can get away with the athleisure scruffy waif look and chuck anything on and be deemed naturally stylish whereas they have to do lots of performative femininity to even be treated nicely, a fat girl in joggers is looked down on.

HOWEVER I hope she’s not made women feel any which way about buying second hand. Also I find it ridiculous for her to be making these points when it’s HER bread and butter to program these insecurities into women to get them to buy buy buy using her aff links? You can’t be about that action and also profiting from the problem?

You explained it perfectly. It's the age old "POC have to work twice as hard" as their white counterparts in order to make it. Or even get by. Because you are not coming from the same starting point.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

You explained it perfectly. It's the age old "POC have to work twice as hard" as their white counterparts in order to make it. Or even get by. Because you are not coming from the same starting point.

Agreed.

But I am surprised she’s defining herself / what is acceptable / what is success by white western standards, she’s guilty of perpetuating these have / have not myths herself. I mean FFS didn’t she accept a free membership at the wing?! Abhorrent.

I’be been upwardly class mobile & currently pregnant and I’m having to curate my social media feed to not make myself feel like I HAVE to do anything to be a good mum or for my baby to be happy. I don’t want to compare myself to my alleged “peers” who are getting everything for free, so I’m blocking the big accounts Myfrugalyear’s book is fab on this actually, I am surprised CB isn’t advocating for that approach to things rather than guess what get even and buy a brand new bugaboo tehe I really showed them?! Like congrats hun great for you

 

[Pain of chocolate]

I completely agree with what you’ve said. I’m not trying to take anything away from what’s going on right now. I stand fully behind the protests. I shouldn’t have worded it like that. I apologise.

No worries i think it's just a sensitive time right now.

Agreed.

But I am surprised she’s defining herself / what is acceptable / what is success by white western standards, she’s guilty of perpetuating these have / have not myths herself. I mean FFS didn’t she accept a free membership at the wing?! Abhorrent.

I’be been upwardly class mobile & currently pregnant and I’m having to curate my social media feed to not make myself feel like I HAVE to do anything to be a good mum or for my baby to be happy. I don’t want to compare myself to my alleged “peers” who are getting everything for free, so I’m blocking the big accounts Myfrugalyear’s book is fab on this actually, I am surprised CB isn’t advocating for that approach to things rather than guess what get even and buy a brand new bugaboo tehe I really showed them?! Like congrats hun great for you

Agreed. She is actually a victim of the system she claims she is fighting against!

 

[Calabria]

I wonder how she’d feel if she saw all of the awful tweets that have been uncovered from Susie Verrill’s account.

 

[karmacoma]

I wonder how she’d feel if she saw all of the awful tweets that have been uncovered from Susie Verrill’s account.

Disgusted like the rest of us I imagine.

She was a massive Candice supporter as well...

 

[Pommes]

Disgusted like the rest of us I imagine.

She was a massive Candice supporter as well...

Yes, unlike the Romanians that Susie tweeted about repeatedly with pure venom.

 

[poopypants]

Why is Candice pretending like her book is selling out everywhere? Isn’t that the sort of bullshit marketing tactic those people trying to flog garden furniture in shopping centres use?

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Why is Candice pretending like her book is selling out everywhere? Isn’t that the sort of bullshit marketing tactic those people trying to flog garden furniture in shopping centres use?

I’m sure it’ll be the first book that manages to break the kindle store Isn’t it at #20 odd week one?

 

[Basicbasic]

She'll be absolutely fizzing in her pants that the blm movement is going on at the same time her book was released. And don't come at me about saying that, I'm a woman of colour and CB does not represent me and has done duck all for black people save for lining her own pockets and pimping vulnerable women.

 

[NosyWelshCow]

People who decide overnight they need a dog, are absolutely the kind of people who shouldn’t get one.

 

[Basicbasic]

I wonder if pr agencies sent out a memo to them all. I've seen 8 Instahuns get a cute dog in the last few months. Wtf.

 

[EmilyChambers]

I wonder how she’d feel if she saw all of the awful tweets that have been uncovered from Susie Verrill’s account.

Ooh what are these tweets? Can't stand that woman and I've been offline this week because of work

 

[karmacoma]

Ooh what are these tweets? Can't stand that woman and I've been offline this week because of work

A very small selection. The full list is over in the Susie thread.

 

[frostily]

Oh god do you remember when everyone got a sausage dog

 

[Fathead]

She'll be absolutely fizzing in her pants that the blm movement is going on at the same time her book was released. And don't come at me about saying that, I'm a woman of colour and CB does not represent me and has done duck all for black people save for lining her own pockets and pimping vulnerable women.

Yes precisely what I came on to say. This timing is sheer luck and she doesn’t deserve it.