Hi everyone, im just wondering if anyone else has been diagnosed with this? I finally got diagnosed back in February 2020, after years of being fobbed off by my GP. i always knew there was something different with me (from about 14/15). Ive done some pretty questionable stuff when it comes to drugs, sex, and i really struggle with impulsive behaviour. I was actually really happy when i finally got my diagnosis as opposed to thinking it was just a label as it helped me understand my behaviour. Ive wrote this post as a way we can give each other advice, and to chat about it in a non-judgmental way.... I hate how we seem to be demonized and seen as 'bad' people, because we really are not. Love to you all xx
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Yes I have. It was a few years ago now and I was put under the care of the mental health team. To be honest I was horrified about the diagnosis to begin with but my husband said he had long suspected it to be the case. I’m still working with a psychologist and I feel for me I’m on the lighter end of the spectrum in that I feel my symptoms fluctuate. At times they can be terrible and I become really distressed and then other times I’m better able to manage. I did do a 12 week course in DBT which did help me, I was hoping to be put on the full course but they decided it was best for me to work with a psychologist who is trained in DBT rather than put me on the course. I have come to peace with the diagnosis, like you say it has helped me to understand my behaviour. But I haven’t told everyone close to me and I do still feel some level of shame. I’ve noticed the diagnosis getting mentioned in films and on tv and it’s always in the absolute worst light so that doesn’t make me feel very good. How are you coping with it all? X
Yeah diagnosed just over 10yrs ago. I was offered DBT 5yrs ago but got kicked off due to being heavily pregnant. I went so long without help, I just learnt how to cope myself. I generally feel in control. The waves of depression are more disruptive now.
I started therapy at the age of 25. Three months after I decided my life wasn't worth living. My therapist didn't tell me for 9 months and it was something I asked him after I read the main criteria and it just fit. He said he didn't want me to see myself as a label .
I always knew that there was something wrong. I grew up in a house where there was a lot of domestic violence, emotional abuse and neglect. It was normal to watch my mother cry on the stairs. My depression really started when I was 14 and had a hard time at school, but i also had panic attacks and anxiety as a child.
I felt too much. My second year of my second degree at university was just extreme ups and downs. I couldn't control my moods at all. I didn't even know what I was feeling. I self harmed a lot.
I did have almost four years of therapy (3.11 months at the moment). I started out with twice a week sessions, but my therapist saw me a a slightly discounted rate of £40 instead of his usual £50+ for three years before he raised his prices because of covid. Sometimes we'd just do one session weekly then increase when I had exams. There was also around one month off for his summer holiday then usually 2 weeks for Easter and Christmas between that each year.
I'm glad I'm not where I was before I started. but it was so hard. I still do feel low and do still get suicidal thoughts, but I very rarely self harm anymore. I feel like I also grew more into myself- I can self soothe a lot better which was a huge part of the problem when I was distressed. I don't think I'm 100% fixed but I feel like it's an okay time to stop therapy for now.
This was the best documentary I found and I love Dr Aguirre:
I always knew that there was something wrong. I grew up in a house where there was a lot of domestic violence, emotional abuse and neglect. It was normal to watch my mother cry on the stairs. My depression really started when I was 14 and had a hard time at school, but i also had panic attacks and anxiety as a child.
I felt too much. My second year of my second degree at university was just extreme ups and downs. I couldn't control my moods at all. I didn't even know what I was feeling. I self harmed a lot.
I did have almost four years of therapy (3.11 months at the moment). I started out with twice a week sessions, but my therapist saw me a a slightly discounted rate of £40 instead of his usual £50+ for three years before he raised his prices because of covid. Sometimes we'd just do one session weekly then increase when I had exams. There was also around one month off for his summer holiday then usually 2 weeks for Easter and Christmas between that each year.
I'm glad I'm not where I was before I started. but it was so hard. I still do feel low and do still get suicidal thoughts, but I very rarely self harm anymore. I feel like I also grew more into myself- I can self soothe a lot better which was a huge part of the problem when I was distressed. I don't think I'm 100% fixed but I feel like it's an okay time to stop therapy for now.
This was the best documentary I found and I love Dr Aguirre:
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aww Yes im currently doing the decider skills at the moment. Its okay, but i always worry about sharing stuff incase i trigger the other 2 members of our group.
Im quite lucky that i have a supportive network, my poor partner has put up with a lot of tit from me- ive taken drugs- heroin and crack, and cheated on him. And although he was absolutely livid, we are still together and he is working through it with me. The worst thing is he aksed me why i cheated on him, and i dont even know myself. The person i cheated with was so ugly and narcassitic and not a nice person at all. And yet my partner is lovely, and handsome, and kind and caring. It makes no sense why i behaved the way i did.
Im much better now, i havent taken drugs since the beginning of June, ive been much more stable, im on meds that seem to be working, and im certainly not tempted to cheat or anything like that.
Does anyone else take mirtazapine and escitalapram? I do, and although they are helping ive put on over 2stone. I really struggle with my sense of self and im really struggling with my weight gain. I have always been known as slim, and tbh my body was the only thing i thought i had going for me. So to go from being slim to just average is really really difficult for me. Sometimes i think im never going to be happy with myself, and im so selfish and shallow that being slim is important to me, when in reality im lucky to even be alive (i took 2 overdoses this year and im lucky to be alive).
Sorry for waffling on, its not often i get to chat about BPD so openly xx
Im quite lucky that i have a supportive network, my poor partner has put up with a lot of tit from me- ive taken drugs- heroin and crack, and cheated on him. And although he was absolutely livid, we are still together and he is working through it with me. The worst thing is he aksed me why i cheated on him, and i dont even know myself. The person i cheated with was so ugly and narcassitic and not a nice person at all. And yet my partner is lovely, and handsome, and kind and caring. It makes no sense why i behaved the way i did.
Im much better now, i havent taken drugs since the beginning of June, ive been much more stable, im on meds that seem to be working, and im certainly not tempted to cheat or anything like that.
Does anyone else take mirtazapine and escitalapram? I do, and although they are helping ive put on over 2stone. I really struggle with my sense of self and im really struggling with my weight gain. I have always been known as slim, and tbh my body was the only thing i thought i had going for me. So to go from being slim to just average is really really difficult for me. Sometimes i think im never going to be happy with myself, and im so selfish and shallow that being slim is important to me, when in reality im lucky to even be alive (i took 2 overdoses this year and im lucky to be alive).
Sorry for waffling on, its not often i get to chat about BPD so openly xx
I'm so glad I found this thread. I have had it suggested by a couple of close friends that they feel I might have BPD rather than depression. I'm scared to talk to my GP about it though. I'm always poorly as it is (my immune system is fucked) and I dont want to be calling about yet another thing. I'm worried they'll think I'm overreacting or I'm a hypochondriac. I've seen 3 therapists over my lifetime and none of them have ever suggested it.
I have a lof of the symptoms and I've had a very traumatic childhood which I'm still struggling to come to terms with.
I have a lof of the symptoms and I've had a very traumatic childhood which I'm still struggling to come to terms with.
I was diagnosed in my teens. I really really struggled but now I am in my early 30s I feel I have better coping mechanisms. I haven’t been on medication for quite some time. I do struggle very badly with impulsive and obsessive behaviour but I don’t do this in relation to anything reckless or damaging. I get quite bad panic too and I do have quite bad periods of depression but other than that I am a lot better than I was. I do think it is something you can come out the other side of.
I feel like I have this but has never been diagnosed because I’ve had anxiety and anorexia since being a teen and EVERYTHING gets blamed on that. Right now I’d say my depression is eating me up. Only today I’ve laid in the bath and wanted to accidentally on purpose go under and not come back up (the thought of my mum finding me naked freaks me out too much (which feeds into my body dysmorphia) to actually do it. So I just spend 2.5 hours crying on my bedroom floor instead. Then I’ll go downstairs like everything is ok. I have a fair few issues tbf I won’t go to the doctors and I also haven’t left the house since November 1st 2019 on foot (only in the safe space of my car) because I think I’m too fat and ugly.
Honestly no one is bothered about how thin or fat you are. There's loads of absolutely massive people about and no one gives a duck. Just ring the Drs, you don't need to go. A lot of them are just doing phone calls only at the moment anyway.x
Bless you darling, that sounds difficult and no way for any one to live. I know it is very hard and very daunting but I implore you to go to the doctors. They can really, really help you x
Hello lovely, you're not alone. I have been diagnosed with severe depression with emotional instability (so some symptoms of BPD). It can feel really isolating but it is normal and great to feel postive about a diagnosis, it helps us identify more with others, understand ourselves more and get better treatment.
Unfortunately for me DBT isn't offered in my area on the NHS and I can't afford to go private so I can't go down that route at the moment. Medication really helps me and I wouldn't be here without it, however, and a big believer in their being no shame in needing it to help you. So if you feel you need it, it could be an area to explore.
For me I have found the best angle is to think about what areas of your life are most affected by your mental health, and look at how medication or therapy or anything else can help. For me my sleep has always been affected and this makes me feel worse in turn. So I take medication to help me sleep. I have a history with serious body image issues and so I do things to try help this, including being very selective about who I follow on social media, wearing clothes that have stretch to avoid feeling overly sensitive to weight changes, and eating regular meals to prevent obsession over food.
I also have a history of drug use and questionable sexual encounters. I have moved past it but see it as having been me doing what I needed to cope with who I was then. Try not to judge yourself for using whatever tools you had at your disposal to make yourself feel OK.
Happy to talk more if you need any more advice. Best wishes!
You are incredibly brave
My childhood was similar and we are made of tough stuff. Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone with having grown up with these things and having found university so difficult.
Eating disorders and anxiety are two very common symptoms of BPD. I would try see a different doctor and push to see a psychiatrist. BPD is notoriously badly diagnosed with most sufferers not being diagnosed for years.
Sending you love and strength lovely. Body image issues are very very difficult. Ive been there. A lot than vanity as most people seem to think and intrexibly linked with other mental health struggles.
I can relate to a lot of these issues. My mental health issues have destroyed many a good relationship, both platonic and romantic. Ive also used a lot of drugs.
I took mitrazapine for a while because I have insomnia and it helped with sleep. I was on it with other antidepressants at the same time. I also put on a lot of weight which was really tough with a history of eating disorders. I told my doctor and they changed me to trazadone which has very similar effects but without the weight gain side effect being commonly reported. It has made the WORLD of difference to me, and I've taken pretty much every antidepressant. One to ask your doctor about if you haven't already tried it. Im no doctor though so definitely ask their opinion.
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Thank you for starting this thread.
Honestly i have suffered with my mental health pretty badly on and off since college. I'm now 32.
I have anxiety disorder.
Over the last 1-2 years I feel it has got alot worse my brain goes wild with anxiety paranoia, constant bad thoughts, tells me my loved ones hate me, husband's gonna leave etc. But this lasts from a couple of hours to weeks at a time it's never the same.
I can feel suicidal one minute then fine the other. Its only due to a thread on tattle that described BPD that I read the symptoms. Not really sure what to do about it. If covid wasn't around I'd poss go see my gp and tell my family it was for something else.
Sorry to totally invade your thread but I was hoping to see something on here to relate to.
Much love to everyone
Honestly i have suffered with my mental health pretty badly on and off since college. I'm now 32.
I have anxiety disorder.
Over the last 1-2 years I feel it has got alot worse my brain goes wild with anxiety paranoia, constant bad thoughts, tells me my loved ones hate me, husband's gonna leave etc. But this lasts from a couple of hours to weeks at a time it's never the same.
I can feel suicidal one minute then fine the other. Its only due to a thread on tattle that described BPD that I read the symptoms. Not really sure what to do about it. If covid wasn't around I'd poss go see my gp and tell my family it was for something else.
Sorry to totally invade your thread but I was hoping to see something on here to relate to.
Much love to everyone
I dont think you're invading the thread, it's what it's hear for.Thank you for starting this thread.
Honestly i have suffered with my mental health pretty badly on and off since college. I'm now 32.
I have anxiety disorder.
Over the last 1-2 years I feel it has got alot worse my brain goes wild with anxiety paranoia, constant bad thoughts, tells me my loved ones hate me, husband's gonna leave etc. But this lasts from a couple of hours to weeks at a time it's never the same.
I can feel suicidal one minute then fine the other. Its only due to a thread on tattle that described BPD that I read the symptoms. Not really sure what to do about it. If covid wasn't around I'd poss go see my gp and tell my family it was for something else.
Sorry to totally invade your thread but I was hoping to see something on here to relate to.
Much love to everyone
I would call your GP as the first step, they'll probably do a phone appointment rather than face to face
A GP wont be able to diagnose BPD, but they will be able to make the necessary referrals for an assessment. Another diagnosis that comes up along with BPD is Complex PTSD. Don't suffer in silence x
not true.
Actually if you get a good consultant they will refuse to diagnose BPD because it can stop you getting real treatment for anorexia.
they are in NO way related
I Have been diagnosed with complex PTSD and I’ve had two courses of 12 week therapy sessions. I’m finally in recovery due to the therapy I've received and my medication being tailored correctly to me. Along with changes to my lifestyle ( I’ve not drank alcohol since last November and no longer binge eat ( I put my coping mechanisms into place to stop it) learnt from therapy. The best thing I have ever done was have therapy and without it - I truly think I would not be here today. Lots of love to you all. Always seek help because there is a life to be lived out there and there are people who love you xxxx
It is for complex PTSD as I have both a eating disorder ( binging) and anxiety and I’ve been diagnosed. However not sure about BPD. However I do know that both diagnoses are very similar in traits and this is why it takes a while to get Diagnosed properly
Adhd in women can also be misdiagnosed as BPD at times. BPD is a bit of a strange one in that respect, for misdiagnosis and comorbidities.
They are commonly diagnosed together. Obviously someone with an eating disorder can not have BPD but they are commonly diagnosed together. I have mental health training and have been told this by multiple psychiatrists.
My point is that just because you have anxiety and an eating disorder does not mean you don't have BPD. And from everything I have been told, lots of people with BPD, have eating disorders and anxiety issues.
It is for BPD as far as I have been trained and from information from psychiatrists. In theory a lot of these disorders are complex mental health issues involving feeling out of control and anxious (with other symptoms depending upon the conditon), and eating disorders give a sense of "control" that calms a lot of people (which obviously cause more problems too).
thats not what you said. You said an eating disorder was a symptom of BPD. Not true.
You might have multiple disorders but none are a symptom of the other.
BPD isn’t really recognised as a real disorder in old school psych