Bad In-Laws Stories.

[xoxo GG]

God where do I start with my MIL. Self centred, manipulative, rude and overbearing. She told me after our first daughter was stillborn that we shouldn’t think about another until I’d found out what I’d ‘done to cause it.’ Told us she was disappointed when I fell pregnant again because I’d been selfish enough to risk putting HER through all the pain and heartache again. She still controls my partner, complains he doesn’t call enough then huffs and puffs when he does.
Never comes to visit us and our little one, we always have to go to her, then she complains she doesn’t see her enough. Was there constantly after my little girl was born, our first night home with her and she told FIL to fetch the car seat as she was taking her with her to let us get some rest and to feed her properly because I was failing at breastfeeding her. Rearranged LOs whole bedroom because she ‘didn’t like how I’d done things.’
She loves to tell my partner that the only reason me and her don’t get along is because I’m trying to push them apart. Constantly throws tantrums alike to a toddler when she doesn’t get her way. Complains when we don’t get her birthday/Mother’s Day off work because we ‘don’t appreciate her any other day of the year.’
Complains about how much my parents see our little girl (they’ve always offered to be childcare when I went back to work) but told us she’s done raising kids now so we should never ask her to babysit.

This lockdown has been bliss being able to distance ourselves from them. How I wish it could last

 

[imaginedragon83]

God where do I start with my MIL. Self centred, manipulative, rude and overbearing. She told me after our first daughter was stillborn that we shouldn’t think about another until I’d found out what I’d ‘done to cause it.’ Told us she was disappointed when I fell pregnant again because I’d been selfish enough to risk putting HER through all the pain and heartache again. She still controls my partner, complains he doesn’t call enough then huffs and puffs when he does.
Never comes to visit us and our little one, we always have to go to her, then she complains she doesn’t see her enough. Was there constantly after my little girl was born, our first night home with her and she told FIL to fetch the car seat as she was taking her with her to let us get some rest and to feed her properly because I was failing at breastfeeding her. Rearranged LOs whole bedroom because she ‘didn’t like how I’d done things.’
She loves to tell my partner that the only reason me and her don’t get along is because I’m trying to push them apart. Constantly throws tantrums alike to a toddler when she doesn’t get her way. Complains when we don’t get her birthday/Mother’s Day off work because we ‘don’t appreciate her any other day of the year.’
Complains about how much my parents see our little girl (they’ve always offered to be childcare when I went back to work) but told us she’s done raising kids now so we should never ask her to babysit.

This lockdown has been bliss being able to distance ourselves from them. How I wish it could last

Sounds all to familiar.
And also so so sorry about your stillbirth xx

 

[Definitelyme]

I genuinely like and respect my MIL. She's a great woman, and a wonderful grandparent to my kids.

Buuut she has a blind spot for my SIL. Not so bad anymore, but in years gone by my sil could do absolutely no wrong, even when she was hurting my husband. Everything was excused because "oh that's just Jane." ( not her actual name!) As a result, my SIL never had to grow up or take responsibility for her actions (she is older than my husband), and was incredibly selfish. We had a major falling out after our first child was born but of course MIL took her side, even when my husband explained how hurtful his sister's behaviour was to him. It led to a few years of bad feeling between MIL and I, which thankfully seems to have been ironed out now. As I said I greatly respect her and think she is a wonderful woman....but I do wish she and FIL held SIL to account over her behaviour rather than making constant excuses.

The problem I have is really more with SIL, although over the last year that has thankfully settled as she has grown up a bit.

 

[LT31514]

My mother in law is Belgian, she lied to me and my husband for 5 years that she didn’t speak English until my parents came over to visit and she was practically fluent. All the times I’ve struggled making small talk in Dutch and she could easily have spoken English. That’s just the tip of the iceberg but something me and my husband still laugh about when she suddenly came out with “do you want a cup of tea?”

 

[Dickydoo123]

My MIL and Step FIL aren’t allowed anywhere my house otherwise I’ll let my dogs out to eat the bleeping pair of them. I’m an honest person, very loyal and trustworthy; I’ll have your back 100% but push me into a corner where my child is involved and I’ll eat you alive, screaming.
My family are the salt of the earth; non judgemental, will feed, home and clothe you because you know what? People make mistakes in life and they’ll help you up when others would kick you while you’re down. Me and my family would and will never look down on others but one side of my in laws are above their station, snobby but for no reason. All fur coat and no knickers as we say around here. I will never allow my child to behave or think their way is how family behave, so she has little to do with them. It’s too far gone to fix, they’ll never be allowed to dictate contact neither will my husband. He knows his family is odd and if it came to the crunch, I would protect my child over his family at the cost of my marriage. It’s not a power I hold over him, he just knows how it is. Unfortunately his mother has never been held accountable for her behaviour and I’m not willing to be the one that suffers for their lack of boundries. Anybody’s position in a family makes no odds to me, don’t rely on that as a defence or weapon; behaviour is where it’s at

Edit: how great you think you are as a grandparent has no bearing on my thoughts of you, being a parent is first and foremost THEN a grandparent

God where do I start with my MIL. Self centred, manipulative, rude and overbearing. She told me after our first daughter was stillborn that we shouldn’t think about another until I’d found out what I’d ‘done to cause it.’ Told us she was disappointed when I fell pregnant again because I’d been selfish enough to risk putting HER through all the pain and heartache again. She still controls my partner, complains he doesn’t call enough then huffs and puffs when he does.
Never comes to visit us and our little one, we always have to go to her, then she complains she doesn’t see her enough. Was there constantly after my little girl was born, our first night home with her and she told FIL to fetch the car seat as she was taking her with her to let us get some rest and to feed her properly because I was failing at breastfeeding her. Rearranged LOs whole bedroom because she ‘didn’t like how I’d done things.’
She loves to tell my partner that the only reason me and her don’t get along is because I’m trying to push them apart. Constantly throws tantrums alike to a toddler when she doesn’t get her way. Complains when we don’t get her birthday/Mother’s Day off work because we ‘don’t appreciate her any other day of the year.’
Complains about how much my parents see our little girl (they’ve always offered to be childcare when I went back to work) but told us she’s done raising kids now so we should never ask her to babysit.

This lockdown has been bliss being able to distance ourselves from them. How I wish it could last

Nope sorry, you’re dancing to her tune and that’s where she has you! Why??? Your husband need to grow some balls and tell her life isn’t about her now!

 

[Kim Mild]

New member but I just want to vent about how much I can't stand my fil . He is such a hypocrite and a cheap skate ( both qualities I can't stand) and he never seems sincere. He's tried to control everyone and buys clothes as presents to make people dress how he thinks they should. He started his business when he sons were adults, and they have to work for him, bil actually left uni to work there . I'm sure that's just another way to control them. It makes me cross just thinking about him.

 

[LittleMy]

My MIL and Step FIL aren’t allowed anywhere my house otherwise I’ll let my dogs out to eat the bleeping pair of them. I’m an honest person, very loyal and trustworthy; I’ll have your back 100% but push me into a corner where my child is involved and I’ll eat you alive, screaming.
My family are the salt of the earth; non judgemental, will feed, home and clothe you because you know what? People make mistakes in life and they’ll help you up when others would kick you while you’re down. Me and my family would and will never look down on others but one side of my in laws are above their station, snobby but for no reason. All fur coat and no knickers as we say around here. I will never allow my child to behave or think their way is how family behave, so she has little to do with them. It’s too far gone to fix, they’ll never be allowed to dictate contact neither will my husband. He knows his family is odd and if it came to the crunch, I would protect my child over his family at the cost of my marriage. It’s not a power I hold over him, he just knows how it is. Unfortunately his mother has never been held accountable for her behaviour and I’m not willing to be the one that suffers for their lack of boundries. Anybody’s position in a family makes no odds to me, don’t rely on that as a defence or weapon; behaviour is where it’s at

Edit: how great you think you are as a grandparent has no bearing on my thoughts of you, being a parent is first and foremost THEN a grandparent



Nope sorry, you’re dancing to her tune and that’s where she has you! Why??? Your husband need to grow some balls and tell her life isn’t about her now!

Have to agree. I would stamp that out immediately! My MIL isn’t overbearing luckily and she is a nice person, she’s just hard work sometimes due to her alcohol addiction. Sometimes it feels like my husband is the parent and she’s the child. My own mum is the more overbearing In-Law (she always has been even when I was a child and we clash a lot) but then she’s also the one who’s more present in my children’s lives. If I don’t like what she has to say or do, I will tell her straight and then distance myself from her until she drops whatever it is because I cannot be arsed with that tit.

 

[xoxo GG]

My MIL and Step FIL aren’t allowed anywhere my house otherwise I’ll let my dogs out to eat the bleeping pair of them. I’m an honest person, very loyal and trustworthy; I’ll have your back 100% but push me into a corner where my child is involved and I’ll eat you alive, screaming.
My family are the salt of the earth; non judgemental, will feed, home and clothe you because you know what? People make mistakes in life and they’ll help you up when others would kick you while you’re down. Me and my family would and will never look down on others but one side of my in laws are above their station, snobby but for no reason. All fur coat and no knickers as we say around here. I will never allow my child to behave or think their way is how family behave, so she has little to do with them. It’s too far gone to fix, they’ll never be allowed to dictate contact neither will my husband. He knows his family is odd and if it came to the crunch, I would protect my child over his family at the cost of my marriage. It’s not a power I hold over him, he just knows how it is. Unfortunately his mother has never been held accountable for her behaviour and I’m not willing to be the one that suffers for their lack of boundries. Anybody’s position in a family makes no odds to me, don’t rely on that as a defence or weapon; behaviour is where it’s at

Edit: how great you think you are as a grandparent has no bearing on my thoughts of you, being a parent is first and foremost THEN a grandparent



Nope sorry, you’re dancing to her tune and that’s where she has you! Why??? Your husband need to grow some balls and tell her life isn’t about her now!

We don’t dance to her tune at all. It’s very complicated as to why we still have contact with her, it isn’t as crystal clear as just not ever seeing her again as well as the fact that to cut contact with her would cut off that entire side of the family which is understandably something my partner doesn’t want. We can abide her once a week for an hour. She knows life isn’t about her now when it comes to my partner and that’s what she doesn’t like, it’s the lack of control over him.

 

[Red1234]

One boyfriend I had, we lived about 30 miles away from each other. We were together 4 years....I never met his parents. He never invited me, he'd met mine and all my family, but he only even invited me over to his house when they were out or on holiday . I was young at the time and too busy having fun with my mates to be too bothered but I look back now and just laugh at the absurdity. There was still a picture of him and his ex in the living room when I did go round (when his parents were on holiday!)!! He used to turn it round like that would stop me seeing it didn't even bother to hide it! How I laugh about that now!

 

[bubbadabut]

Oh where to start with mine?

When my husband and I settled down, we decided to move equidistant to both sets of parents (about 30 mins either side). Soon became apparent that the in-laws couldn't be arsed to visit. They'd make arrangements but on the day there'd always be some excuse. 'Oooh its raining, motorways are lethal in the rain". Yes, seriously. Father in law was a driver for a living and had done numerous advanced driving courses. After our 2nd child we decided we needed more help, so moved closer to my family, about 45 mins from the in laws..

The lack of interest only worsened, even after giving them 4 grandchildren and their only grandaughter. Took them 3 weeks to visit our 3rd after he was born, despite them both being retired. They were too tired, apparently. It was always us having to visit them. Occasionally forgetting the kids birthdays, 'saving' all four kids birthday gifts up for when they could actually be bothered to visit.

They always showed clear favouritism for the eldest grandson. Things got really bad when they decided out of the blue to get a dog, knowing full well that 2 of our kids had a dog allergy, meaning visiting their house involved dosing them up on antihistamines. On the rare occasion that they did visit us, the 2 allergic kids consistently reacted, badly, from even just hugging them. They hadn't told us, but they had been bringing the dog with them in the car, because they couldn't bear to be separated from it for a few hours. Youngest son by this point had a severe dog allergy and epipens for various other allergies. In-laws showed no regard for this, trying to give him the food he was allergic to because they didn't believe in all that kind of stuff. Father in law couldn't be bothered to go and see his mum down in Kent who was seriously ill in hospital, even though my husband offered to drive him down there. FIL said he didn't want to see her like that. It has always been about what they want. FIL has always been a weak man totally enabled by his wife. Anyway my husband went down to see his nan and fell out with his parents massively for about 18 months over that.

Honestly typing this is getting me so worked up. I haven't spoken to them for over a year after things came to a head when yet another planned visit got cancelled on the day. I went mental at the mother in law over the phone and my life has been so much nicer without them in it. My husband maintained contact with his parents. At least, until a few months ago. His parents have no financial sense whatsoever and recently had to downsize due to their debts. They asked my husband if he would take out a £10k loan for them to tide them over until they sold their house. (House had already been on the market for 18 months at this point). He said no, as we already had a loan ourselves, and all the money we had saved was required to pay into his business, as he was becoming a partner. Husband told them to contact Citizens Advice. Radio silence from the in-laws. We heard nothing from them for another couple of months, when they tried again for the loan. Again husband said no, and for the first time ever he actually stood up to them, saying 'I've already got 5 dependents, I don't need 2 more'. Haven't heard from them since, and life is sweet. Honestly, there's so much more that I haven't put here; all the insults, the snide remarks. I do have it all documented, just in case it's needed one day, and to remind me of what utter shitbags they are.

 

[Chickenchips]

Didn’t acknowledge me or send condolences when I had a miscarriage .completely ignored me and sister in law told me they were bitching about me. Before the miscarriage I organised my sister in laws baby shower and paid for it . Mother in law now ignores me when she sees me . On top of that they publicly congratulated my partners crazy interfering stalker ex girlfriend who has caused me a lot of hassle over the years on new pregnancy with new partner.

so hurtful that I’ve been ostracised by them
on top of a painful and sad miscarriage . I was honest and told them I was sad about them not getting in touch with me about it but they just ignored my messages .

 

[bubbadabut]

Didn’t acknowledge me or send condolences when I had a miscarriage .completely ignored me and sister in law told me they were bitching about me. Before the miscarriage I organised my sister in laws baby shower and paid for it . Mother in law now ignores me when she sees me . On top of that they publicly congratulated my partners crazy interfering stalker ex girlfriend who has caused me a lot of hassle over the years on new pregnancy with new partner.

so hurtful that I’ve been ostracised by them
on top of a painful and sad miscarriage . I was honest and told them I was sad about them not getting in touch with me about it but they just ignored my messages .

My deepest condolences. I hope you are ok now

I had a similar experience. I had 2 miscarriages. After the first one, my husband told me not to mention it to my in-laws as he knew his mum wasn't a sympathetic person. After my second one in December 2016, we visited them shortly after to spend Christmas at their house. They didn't even know we had been pregnant. As we arrived at their house, they had Sky News on, and it was saying that Zara Phillips had lost her baby. My mother in law replied, quick as a flash 'urgh, how inconvenient having a miscarriage just before Christmas, tut tut'. Not 'how sad, poor girl' or 'how awful for her especially at this time of year'. Nope, it was just an inconvenience. I just wanted to scream at her **trigger warning**

Spoiler: **Trigger warning**

'Yes having to pass a dead baby out of my vagina is always such an inconvenience to me'

Stupid unfeeling cow. Put me in a foul mood for the rest of our stay and I think we eventually left early as I couldn't spend a minute longer in her company.

 

[Chickenchips]

My deepest condolences. I hope you are ok now

I had a similar experience. I had 2 miscarriages. After the first one, my husband told me not to mention it to my in-laws as he knew his mum wasn't a sympathetic person. After my second one in December 2016, we visited them shortly after to spend Christmas at their house. They didn't even know we had been pregnant. As we arrived at their house, they had Sky News on, and it was saying that Zara Phillips had lost her baby. My mother in law replied, quick as a flash 'urgh, how inconvenient having a miscarriage just before Christmas, tut tut'. Not 'how sad, poor girl' or 'how awful for her especially at this time of year'. Nope, it was just an inconvenience. I just wanted to scream at her **trigger warning**

Spoiler: **Trigger warning**

'Yes having to pass a dead baby out of my vagina is always such an inconvenience to me'

Stupid unfeeling cow. Put me in a foul mood for the rest of our stay and I think we eventually left early as I couldn't spend a minute longer in her company.

Shocking !!!!! So so nasty and thoughtless . I find it very difficult not to take my upset at their behaviour out on partner . Thank goodness we are nothing like our in laws

 

[Chickenchips]

Shocking !!!!! So so nasty and thoughtless . I find it very difficult not to take my upset at their behaviour out on partner . Thank goodness we are nothing like our in laws

My deepest condolences. I hope you are ok now

I had a similar experience. I had 2 miscarriages. After the first one, my husband told me not to mention it to my in-laws as he knew his mum wasn't a sympathetic person. After my second one in December 2016, we visited them shortly after to spend Christmas at their house. They didn't even know we had been pregnant. As we arrived at their house, they had Sky News on, and it was saying that Zara Phillips had lost her baby. My mother in law replied, quick as a flash 'urgh, how inconvenient having a miscarriage just before Christmas, tut tut'. Not 'how sad, poor girl' or 'how awful for her especially at this time of year'. Nope, it was just an inconvenience. I just wanted to scream at her **trigger warning**

Spoiler: **Trigger warning**

'Yes having to pass a dead baby out of my vagina is always such an inconvenience to me'

Stupid unfeeling cow. Put me in a foul mood for the rest of our stay and I think we eventually left early as I couldn't spend a minute longer in her company.

Sending love to you from one angel mama to another xxx

 

[Blackbird]

My MiL seems to have two different sides to her. There's the side that only I see (nasty), and the side that comes out when my husband is around.

When we first got together some 20+ years ago, my MiL asked what happened to the nice girl my now-husband used to date - I mean, who does that? I was so tempted to respond that maybe she ended up with the dream MiL I could've had instead, but bit my tongue - ha! She frequently makes little snide remarks in front of others that only I catch, such as when going through old photos saying she wasn't yet 50 and didn't have one grey hair and looking at me straight away (I have blonde hair with white blonde streaks, and yes, the odd grey hair). But just lately she's become really nasty. Actually, my husband did see this side of her once, when she threw a tantrum because her Solitaire computer game's interface had changed and when I tried to point out to her that it was a system-wide change she morphed into a sulky young child.

Anyhoo, lately she's become particularly mean ... some people say that as people age they get really bitter, and that's probably it. But it doesn't help that my SiL - who I have very little to do with but loves to gossip and cause shite - seems to have her drinking the kool aid and believing whatever it is she is telling her (which must be made up as we don't have friends or interests in common, and aside from business profiles I don't do social media). My SiL is salty because we've declined many social invitations she's issued - she's just annoying and we don't want much to do with her.

My FiL died a few months ago and I'm realising it was he that kept my MiL's strange personality hidden for the most part; and that he was the glue that held everything together.

Her latest obsession is getting her hair done by some hairdresser who is a good hour's drive away from where she used to live (she moved recently, to be closer to my SiL). She's demanded (not asked, nicely) that I drive her up there and wait while she has a perm and cut. I've told her politely that I'll drive down to pick her up, take her up there, then drive her back home (about three hours of my time), but she's got all flappy about that. She mentioned it again yesterday and I firmly told her that I don't have time to sit around and wait - I am self-employed and time counts. I then got cross and said she'll have to ask my SiL to take her anyway, as my schedule is filling up. I said that when my husband wasn't within earshot but he agrees with me 100%.

Another thing - she is deaf, and went on and on and on ... and on ... about needing a cochlear implant. Finally her place on the waitlist came through and she doesn't even use the bloody thing! I shouldn't be surprised, though. She's changed doctors three times since she moved to her new house a few months ago, citing issues with each of them, and finds fault with just about everyone and everything. Aaaargh - she makes me so angry.

Oh, and finally - my SiL's little ankle biter, smelly dogs are allowed in her house, but not our beautifully behaved Labradors. She won't even pat them.

 

[Italy2]

I genuinely like and respect my MIL. She's a great woman, and a wonderful grandparent to my kids.

Buuut she has a blind spot for my SIL. Not so bad anymore, but in years gone by my sil could do absolutely no wrong, even when she was hurting my husband. Everything was excused because "oh that's just Jane." ( not her actual name!) As a result, my SIL never had to grow up or take responsibility for her actions (she is older than my husband), and was incredibly selfish. We had a major falling out after our first child was born but of course MIL took her side, even when my husband explained how hurtful his sister's behaviour was to him. It led to a few years of bad feeling between MIL and I, which thankfully seems to have been ironed out now. As I said I greatly respect her and think she is a wonderful woman....but I do wish she and FIL held SIL to account over her behaviour rather than making constant excuses.

The problem I have is really more with SIL, although over the last year that has thankfully settled as she has grown up a bit.

Same situation with the sister in law! The said sister in law also causes so many issues and troubles! There is always some drama going on in her life, always broke and discreetly asking for money and presents as a joke - a joke that never ends. She could get away with murder under the excuse of 'it's just Jane. The irony that if I ever did the same thing as her then I would be held to beg for forgiveness and made to feel so tit about myself! Everything I do is always wrong and never enough.

My mother in law is also very controlling and overbearing! She is constantly calling and messaging my partner. She tells him her secrets and says not to share them with me but she would love to know all my secrets! She has an opinion about everything we should do! She always has advice for her on everything. It's always don't do this, don't do that. She is constantly with my FIL!! My FIL spends all his time with her. They always go everywhere together, they are sat together, they visit everywhere together, they leave the house together and if you need my FIL you have to call/text MIL. FIL doesn't have Facebook or social media so only contact is via text or call and my MIL checks his phone as well!!

 

[Sunflower91]

My ex MIL and FIL had some dogs. One of them was a really badly behaved one. On Boxing Day he managed to get into the fridge and at the left over turkey. Fast forward to dinner time and MIL tries serving us all the left over turkey that the dog had been tucking into. Hard pass from me

 

[Itsallaboutmememe]

Not my in laws now-I adore them and worship them-they could tit on my floor and I’d still love them (they wouldn’t!)

but many moons ago I was with a dv partner (I lived with his mum,brother and him)
he made my life hell (I did walk away in the end)

I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with my first-my waters broke early in the night and I made a mess of the bed (it really couldn’t be helped)

he snatched a glass milk bottle off the side,pinned me down,shoved it into me and told me he would smash it so I’d have to have a c-section

she stood in the doorway smirking at me screaming and him shouting
(he didn’t smash it in the end)

she refused to let me go to hospital-so my baby was born a day later than if I’d just gone in (while smirking saying I’d get an infection and we’d both die)

a few days later my milk came in and I was very full and very sore-I dared to disagree over a snake being cold blooded meant it had cold blood-it means they eat weekly not daily

i dared to disagree saying it meant they eat once a week not everyday

he leapt up,whacked me right on my boob and the old cow sat there smirking and told him not to do it as it would give me cancer

she tried to take over with my baby which really dented my confidence as a few mum-nothing I did was right-and she tried to have a fag in one hand my baby in the other

she took her to the shop without asking-leaving me to phone the police in a panic

she stole from me

she broke my pram by letting her golden grandkids sit in it

she would hide my babies bits and not let me use what I’d paid for

she once went on holiday and took my clothes rather than hers

she put my baby outside with no shade so she got sunstroke (I’d gone for a bath and my ex said he’d have her for an hour)

she broke my babies bath-and would wander in while I was in the bath myself

many many more stories about her but what really hurt is she walked away from her grandchildren and when my daughter saw her working in a supermarket years later she walked up to say hi and who she was-and was told to ’go away’ only not as politely

I’ve not spoken to that witch in 20 years and if I ever see her again I’ll deck it

 

[Blackbird]

Hmmm ... a problematic sister-in-law seems a recurring theme here ...

 

[Itsallaboutmememe]

My ex boyfriends mum used to back him up when he battered me and she said I knew how to “push his buttons” and that really annoyed me because his dad used to batter her, I told her that she and his dad were the reason that he had turned out that way and that she chose to stay in that violent life due to the fact they had a nice big house and the father had good money, when my ex was 7 years old she asked him if she should leave his daddy! She also said “the next time he is kicking your door in then don’t phone the police, phone me”, she has no car and lived 40 mins away on a bus and the police station was around the corner from me, she also used to take him uptown and buy him something new the day after he been lifted for being violent with me!!!

I’ve had the same thing
im sat with two black eyes a broken cheekbone and god knows how many bruises
she rings me to ask why I’d rang the police on him and why had I had him arrested ‘for fun’
she then informs me I should just ‘put up and shut up’ and ‘stop winding him up’
er,he kept telling me I was cheating-which hand on heart I never did-and when I pointed this out she laughed and told me I should stop seeing my males friends!
the friends that refused to come near me in case they made it worse?!
she then got all his siblings to hound me on every sm platform I had
81 times this happened-on the 81st I binned him
fake cow-I hope she drops dead