Alfie Deyes #3 Definitely NOT Gifted

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Clean the supermarket sushi from your veneers and get posting...
 
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thanks to @Bythesea for this screenshot. I love the fact that you can read "ESEL" on his merch which means "donkey" in German and is usually referred to someone really stupid. Very fitting.
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Yel

Moderator
That ruddy sky outsmarting Alfie again!

His teeth always look so silly even from a small picture. He's going to really regret getting them done so young. Can't go back to natural teeth and he'll be spending a fortune of his own money getting them redone when they start falling out.
 
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That ruddy sky outsmarting Alfie again!

His teeth always look so silly even from a small picture. He's going to really regret getting them done so young. Can't go back to natural teeth and he'll be spending a fortune of his own money getting them redone when they start falling out.
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He's literally wearing that shit merchandise every day now - does he think hes subcontiously planting it into our minds so we're gonna be desperate to buy it when it's out.
 
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He never has a jacket or sweater
If he has a child how would be remember to dress it adequately????
 
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He never has a jacket or sweater
If he has a child how would be remember to dress it adequately????
That things he learnt video, where he spouted a load of Alfiestotle bollocks, hasn’t learnt to take a coat when he goes out. Surely, you walk out the door feel it’s a bit chilly and go back inside and grab a coat if you don’t take one anyway. It’s March in the U.K. what the hell does he expect the weather to be like.
 
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That things he learnt video, where he spouted a load of Alfiestotle bollocks, hasn’t learnt to take a coat when he goes out. Surely, you walk out the door feel it’s a bit chilly and go back inside and grab a coat if you don’t take one anyway. It’s March in the U.K. what the hell does he expect the weather to be like.
He doesn't need a coat... he's SAVAGE????⚡⚡?????
 
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That things he learnt video, where he spouted a load of Alfiestotle bollocks, hasn’t learnt to take a coat when he goes out. Surely, you walk out the door feel it’s a bit chilly and go back inside and grab a coat if you don’t take one anyway. It’s March in the U.K. what the hell does he expect the weather to be like.
Since Alfie doesn't care about climate change, he probably thinks hoodies are sufficient to wear all year long. He's been alive for 25 years and he's still this dumb. His parents raised him well...

The futureself merch looks so stupid and is tone-deaf. No one is going to buy his ugly and underwhelming merchandise. All this talk about a future and he's only accelerating to dire global conditions with all the waste he throws out.
 
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I don't know if anyone else has noticed or wondered but I've thought sometimes that he might have ADHD. Just the way that he describes things by repeating the same words or phrases or being redundant and sometimes has a hard time getting a point across ( well, if he even has one that is) and the fact that he seems to have ALLLLL these motivations to do things that NEVER get done. I'm sure a big part is pure laziness because of the spoilt lifestyle he's been able to have, but also I think he's one of those that have big pipe dreams and think they're gonna make a name for themselves in something else and then can't make it happen. And each day or couple of days, it's a new idea. I've dated several guys with these tendencies and it's helped me realize it in others.

Maybe not, but it's a possibility. NOT excusing him. He still wouldn't help himself even if he knew there was a way he could ie if he knew he had it he wouldn't get any help about it because he wouldn't have the motivation to do it + he's the type who can't admit things are wrong.
 
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They had pizza to celebrate 1 year of the office


But what have they ACTUALLY achieved????
Joe and Casper Margravine management has done more in a year. A to Z barely have a functioning website.
 
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They had pizza to celebrate 1 year of the office


But what have they ACTUALLY achieved????
Joe and Casper Margravine management has done more in a year. A to Z barely have a functioning website.
Despicable bastards?????
 
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7384


Hopefully he’s talking about losing Zoe ?
Praying for this breakup!!!! ???
 
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View attachment 7384

Hopefully he’s talking about losing Zoe ?
Praying for this breakup!!!! ???
Why oh why is he thinking he's some great philosopher???????. He's a bloody idiot. He thinks he's so cool and aware of the world. NO MATE, you're a total tosspot, and you've no bloody idea. The wealth you've gained has come from poor kids who have hung on to your every word, bleating a load of shite and not fulfilling what you promised. Such a waste of space with your drivel. What an easy life you've had???
 
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Yel

Moderator
He's literally wearing that shit merchandise every day now - does he think hes subcontiously planting it into our minds so we're gonna be desperate to buy it when it's out.
One of the most infuriating comments on his feed was praising him for releasing a a Fjallraven clone bag at a much cheaper price.

Fjallraven's products are high quality, environmental, use cutting edge technology, sustainable, care about animal rights, worker rights and generally a very socially conscious company. Alfies copy would be bad quality, cheap materials and ultimately a bad investment.

People in Sweden talk of inheriting a kanken bag from their grandparents and it has a 30 year guarantee. Alfie doesn't even use his own bag design after the launch and instead uses a Gucci bag. Alfies bag is hideously expensive compared to the real thing.

He's still got lots of the old merch that he can't sell even discounted.

This new merch is nothing more than a typeface, he would get laughed out of shark tank.
 
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Did anyone see this video? I quite like Hadassah, she shows what a twat Alf really is

 
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7423


Look who Alfie is sitting next to ?
His crush.
I also find it lovely that the girl behind them, her shirt I think says I do not like Mondays lol aka I do not like working here
 
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Did anyone see this video? I quite like Hadassah, she shows what a twat Alf really is

I've watched a few of her others but I think this may be a solid favorite. She makes every good point in this and keeps her train of thought with all that to say, not sure how she does it. And she doesn't have to rant or curse to make it resonate.
 
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He's wondering if the next people on his fake sitdown where he awkwardly giggles at sex podcast have leaked?

Leaked? Really? He actually thinks people give a shit about him?
 
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More like they're so stupidly predictable because he can't get any real stars on it.
 
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The fact that he turns 26 in a few months and cant even say the word sex without giggling like a school boy says it all really.He's the one thats a massive prude,not Zoe.He hates any kind of pda,romance or any meaningful gesture.
 
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